Well, let's see-
sloppy - I'm actually often accused of being a neat freak, both in appearance and environment.
unwashed - absolutely not
obsessive - Well, I don't know if I'd call 30+ hours/week on geeky hobbies
excessive.

OK, yes, big time.
skinny/fat guy - Yep. I often joke that I'm as large as Jabba the Hut (notice how I even describe my geekiness in geek terms)
poor social skills - actually, my social skills are far better than most "non-geeks"
male - yes
under 30 - not for entirely too many years.
bearded - Yes. Long hair, too.
wears lots of black t-shirts - I don't think I own a t-shirt that
isn't black. The vast majority of them have fantasy motifs, too.
plays Evercrack obsessively - Not Evercrack, but other CRPGs. So it counts.
lives in his parents' basement - Nope. Own my own house. There's actually a good chance that one of my parents or in-laws might need to move in with
me.
doesn't have a job - Professional career type. So no.
never had a girlfriend - Married for over 14 years. Even have a teenage son. However, I am teaching him to paint miniatures, which puts this item on the the geek list for creating "Gamer: The Next Generation."
enjoys geeky hobbies apart form gaming - every sci-fi show from Star Trek to Farscape, science fiction, conventions, costuming, computers - actually, I can't really think of a "geeky" hobby I haven't been into at one time or another.
Overall, I'm not just
a geek - I might just be
the geek.