riddles, songs and jokes for gnomes

[kirinke]

does anyone know any good riddles, songs and jokes for gnomes? I need material for a character I'm playing.

 

[reanjr]

I recently heard this riddle. It might have to be updated for a polytheistic world, but...

What is greater than God
More evil than the Devil
The poor have it
The rich need it
You will certainly die if you eat it

...
...
...

Nothing.

 

[Brennin Magalus]

What is small, lame, obnoxious, and should have been omitted from D&D?

 

[The Human Target]

What is small, lame, obnoxious, and should have been omitted from D&D?

Hmmmmmmmm........ you?

 

[shilsen]

Why do all gnomish adventurers finally return to the place they came from?

Because there's no place like gnome.

 

[Brennin Magalus]

What is small, lame, obnoxious, and should have been omitted from D&D?

Hmmmmmmmm........ you?

I'm not small.

 

[Snapdragyn]

Old one, but...

A traveling human merchant walks into a gnome city, & sees a gnome jumping up & down on a sewer grating shouting 'Five! Five! Five!'. She goes over & asks the little fellow what he's doing.

'Oh', he tells her, 'I'm playing one of our famous gnome games! It's SO FUN! Would you like to try?'

'Um, sure,' she replies. 'What do I do?'

'Just jump up & down on this grating, shouting 'Five!' & trying to jump as HIGH as you can!'

The merchant gives it a try, but after a couple of jumps she says 'Hey, this isn't that fun.'

'Oh, you have to jump HIGHER to really enjoy it!' the gnome replies.

So the merchant makes a really BIG jump... & the gnome whips the cover off the grate, causing her to fall into the sewer below. Then he throws the grate back on, stands on it...




... & starts jumping up & down shouting 'Six! Six! Six!'