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Message: <blockquote data-quote="Macbeth" data-source="post: 1478724" data-attributes="member: 11259">Well, first of all, thanks for the criticism. Based on the judge's reponses, I'm reconsidering the running story aspect of the plot. It may just come down to the next set of pictures, and how well the fit into the setting and characters. Obviously having a "To Be Continued" worked against me, but I thought the story still stood on its own.As for spelling/grammar errors: what can I say, Mea Culpa. I wrote it from a different word proceesing program then I'm used to, and totally forgot the spellcheck, since I usualy use the spell-as-you-go feature that highlights mistakes. I will do better next time.In defense of the "coils" picture: I didn't actually immediately see a women. To me, at first glance, it looked like a effeminate man who got mugged by an avant garde fashion designer. So I ran with that impression. Apparently, it didn't come across too well. Eh, I feel the picture is not to gender specific, oh well, the story works just as well with a female villian.The humor was a bit all over the place, I agree. I blame it on my recent reading: Terry Pratchett, Neil Gammien, and Douglas Adams. I didn't feel it was that hard to take, that while I was a bit scattered in my types of comedy, they still worked fine as a whole. Thank you for pointing out that this does not work. I'll try to find a single 'feel' in the future, but I would expect to  see more comedy in the future. I just need to find a comfortable voice somewhere between dark humor and farce. I think what really killed any kind of dark humor feel was the "fashion victim" aspect of Isoceles, but I was streching a ibt for the picture, to make evry aspect of it work, which obviously I didn't do.The characters were a bit flat. In fact I started out with a different idea for Sterling, but he took on his own life on the page. In retrospect, with the feel I got for him by the end, I should have edited the whole thing to make him deeper and more in line with the final vision I arrived at. Unfortunately, I'm not good at going back and rewritting, so I didn't. Live and learn...And I can't say thank you enough for the "snappy dialogue" comment, I was shooting for that, but didn't think it would come across. And knowing my dialogue didn't get bogged down too much gives me a nice feeling of accomplishment to go along with all the work I know I still have to do.All in all, thank you all very much for all of the criticism, and for even taking the time to read my little story. I would also like to thank my opponent. Nice job, Thullgrim, you had me a little worried, and for good reason. I hope to see you around future Ceramic DM competitions. And now, On to round 2!</blockquote>

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