The Closed Eye (DM: Halford, Judge: garyh)
- Thread starter Graf
- Start date
OOC: Noooooooo!
[sblock=Things to do in Daunton before you're Dead]After we get this bit sorted, Palindrome will memorize Sleep. And he's going to take a needle-and-thread and sew the bag of holding with a big snap-covered pocket on the inside of his overalls--right around the groinal region to discourage potential player-character pickpockets.
And he's going to snatch a couple of mousetraps out of the attic and stick them in his jacket pockets.
And maybe some broken glass and rusty nails, too!
You know, because of the THIEF that just joined our party.
He's a THIEF, guys![/sblock]
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Atriden
First Post
When Palindrome enters, the stranger rises from the armchair and makes a small nod towards Palindrome and Woe, but is uncertain if he should salute Tander or not for some unknown reason. " I am Atreus D'torian, not ' Cookie Mugger ' and I believe there are worse jobs Dod could make you do. I once heard of some unfortunate souls that got sent in the sewers. It is beyond me that someone would go there, unless there was a pile of unlimeted gold hidden down there, which is highly unlikely. Dimwitted fool's I say, but I guess a job is a job, no matter what the details are. Don't you agree?" and the stranger accepts Woe's gracious offer with a strange smile and coldly throws down the drink without making a face. He then snatches the letter elegantly from Woe and shoves it in is pouch again. " My purpose has been explained to your partners and it is suffice for you to know that I am here to aid your case. I wish to know what matters you are working on for Lady Glasston and what the plan is" He glances for a moment at Palindrome and notices the gash but makes no remarks. He crosses his arms and awaits the groups answer
OCC: Don't worry Palindrome, this good thief will find a way to your pockets
, muahahaha
OCC: Don't worry Palindrome, this good thief will find a way to your pockets
, muahahaha
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"Whatever you say, Cookie Mugger."
With a wave of Palindrome's hand, a spectral mage hand appears ten feet distant from Palindrome, points at the ground, and slowly revolves around the mage, describing a circle. "This is the I-know-you're-a-dirty-thief-with-nothing-better-on-his-mind-than-picking-my-pockets-so-you'd-better-stay-away-from-me zone. Pickpockets within the zone are subject to immediate magic missiles, acid arrows, etcetera and so forth. Don't blame me if it happens. I don't make the rules. I just follow them."
The mage hand stops pointing at the floor and waves for Palindrome's attention.
"What's that Mage Hand? You have something you want to tell me?"
The hand makes a fist and nods.
"Very well. You have the floor."
The hand performs an elaborate gesture, equivalent to a formal bow.
The hand makes several convoluted, perhaps profane, movements, often pointing at Atreus.
"Oh... You're saying that the Cookie Mugger is dirty nasty sneak-thief with nothing better to do than rifle through my pockets?"
The hand makes a fist and nods.
"Thank you, but I already knew that."
The hand performs an apologetic wave. Then, it claws the air and rushes towards Atreus. It restrains itself, and instead begins hopping about, making vulgar gesticulations.
It is a surprisingly expressive hand!
"Now, now, little hand. There's no need for such bad manners."
The hand droops, suitably chastised. It rushes back to Palindrome's shoulder.
A tiny voice sounds from Palindrome's vest pocket. The mage pulls back his jacket and opens his vest. The voice is a bit louder, but still incoherent.
"What's that, little bugbear eye?"
The voice grows more insistent.
Palindrome pulls the eye out of his pocket. The voice is louder still.
Palindrome points the eye at Atreus. The Palindrome brings his eyes to the level of the bugbear eye and squints. "Oh! I see what you mean."
The eye responds in its tiny high-pitched voice.
"Yes. His soul IS stained with stoogery for our 'beloved' master and does have a certain smallness of scope. Never you mind, little friend. If he proves too troublesome, he can always... Oh, nevermind."
The eye laughs a very tiny, very nasty laugh.
"Say, would you do me a favor?" Palindrome asks the eye.
"Sure!" shouts the bugbear eye.
"How about you and Mr. Hand keep watch out for the nasty sneak-thief?"
The bugbear eye cheers. The mage hand grasps it and floats ten feet away from Palindrome, right between the mage and Atreus.
"Back off, bozo!" says the bugbear eye, now quite audible since it is so close.
Palindrome nods once. Satisfied.
"Now would someone INTERESTING please tell me what happened to Adie?"
[sblock=Oh!]And I reckon Palindrome should do an identify item on the floating quill just in case it does something additionally cool, like take dictation or have infinite ink or writes on air (Now that would be freaking cool!) or somesuch.
Yes, I know I'm a very silly player. I get all goofy for non-combat, non-stat effecting items.[/sblock]
With a wave of Palindrome's hand, a spectral mage hand appears ten feet distant from Palindrome, points at the ground, and slowly revolves around the mage, describing a circle. "This is the I-know-you're-a-dirty-thief-with-nothing-better-on-his-mind-than-picking-my-pockets-so-you'd-better-stay-away-from-me zone. Pickpockets within the zone are subject to immediate magic missiles, acid arrows, etcetera and so forth. Don't blame me if it happens. I don't make the rules. I just follow them."
The mage hand stops pointing at the floor and waves for Palindrome's attention.
"What's that Mage Hand? You have something you want to tell me?"
The hand makes a fist and nods.
"Very well. You have the floor."
The hand performs an elaborate gesture, equivalent to a formal bow.
The hand makes several convoluted, perhaps profane, movements, often pointing at Atreus.
"Oh... You're saying that the Cookie Mugger is dirty nasty sneak-thief with nothing better to do than rifle through my pockets?"
The hand makes a fist and nods.
"Thank you, but I already knew that."
The hand performs an apologetic wave. Then, it claws the air and rushes towards Atreus. It restrains itself, and instead begins hopping about, making vulgar gesticulations.
It is a surprisingly expressive hand!
"Now, now, little hand. There's no need for such bad manners."
The hand droops, suitably chastised. It rushes back to Palindrome's shoulder.
A tiny voice sounds from Palindrome's vest pocket. The mage pulls back his jacket and opens his vest. The voice is a bit louder, but still incoherent.
"What's that, little bugbear eye?"
The voice grows more insistent.
Palindrome pulls the eye out of his pocket. The voice is louder still.
Palindrome points the eye at Atreus. The Palindrome brings his eyes to the level of the bugbear eye and squints. "Oh! I see what you mean."
The eye responds in its tiny high-pitched voice.
"Yes. His soul IS stained with stoogery for our 'beloved' master and does have a certain smallness of scope. Never you mind, little friend. If he proves too troublesome, he can always... Oh, nevermind."
The eye laughs a very tiny, very nasty laugh.
"Say, would you do me a favor?" Palindrome asks the eye.
"Sure!" shouts the bugbear eye.
"How about you and Mr. Hand keep watch out for the nasty sneak-thief?"
The bugbear eye cheers. The mage hand grasps it and floats ten feet away from Palindrome, right between the mage and Atreus.
"Back off, bozo!" says the bugbear eye, now quite audible since it is so close.
Palindrome nods once. Satisfied.
"Now would someone INTERESTING please tell me what happened to Adie?"
[sblock=Oh!]And I reckon Palindrome should do an identify item on the floating quill just in case it does something additionally cool, like take dictation or have infinite ink or writes on air (Now that would be freaking cool!) or somesuch.
Yes, I know I'm a very silly player. I get all goofy for non-combat, non-stat effecting items.[/sblock]
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Dunamin
First Post
[sblock=Adie]
“Anyway, I know you don’t like to play with girls, P, so I connected the dots and got you this one instead. It says in the letter that came with him that his job is to pamper to your every need. Enjoy.”
Woe gives a wink to Atreus, then another for Palindrome for good measure, before slumping down in a padded chair with the bottle of vodka in his hand.
[sblock=Potions]Perhaps Tander or Atreus should take a potion as well? I know none of them are “built” to stand at the frontline for long but accidents do happen, as we’ve learned.[/sblock]
Sounds reasonable. I considered questioning her some more, but I’m thinking it would just eat up game time with little chance that it’ll get us anywhere down the plot highway.[/sblock]
“Comely means when you just want to grab the girl against a wall and…” Before he can finish, they are interrupted by the mage’s giggling entrance. Woe greets him with a toast of his drink, noticing that he can remember Palindrome's name now.
“Awww, you shouldn’t have…” Woe looks at the potions, then looks at his vodka, and a moment of inner conflict battles inside him. Sighing, he fixes a few of the vials in easy-to-reach positions. “You better hold on to one of them yourself, though. We don’t want a repeat situation of that time Tander was out of town and Dod summoned a dire mongoose that immediately turned on you.”
“Didn’t pay attention to what happened to Adie. New girl came along; you know how it is… Thought you claimed Adie as familiar, though? See, that’s why Dod won’t let you keep any pets, there’s some vague idea of responsibility involved.”
“Anyway, I know you don’t like to play with girls, P, so I connected the dots and got you this one instead. It says in the letter that came with him that his job is to pamper to your every need. Enjoy.”
Woe gives a wink to Atreus, then another for Palindrome for good measure, before slumping down in a padded chair with the bottle of vodka in his hand.
[sblock=Potions]Perhaps Tander or Atreus should take a potion as well? I know none of them are “built” to stand at the frontline for long but accidents do happen, as we’ve learned.[/sblock]
Palindrome winces at the mention of the mongoose incident, especially as it occurred around the time of Doddoddod's dubious interest in the sport of ferret-legging--and the mongoose appeared inside Doddoddod's robes--and *someone* (meaning Palindrome) had to retrieve the mongoose.
[Hmm. Replace the word 'winces' with 'vomits in the back of his throat'.]
The wizard stuffs a potion bottle in his vest.
"Nooo," Palindrome says.
He presses the back of his right hand to his forehead and swoons. "Oh, Adie, I could have loved you--or at least demonstrated some abstracted interest in you until I found you inconvenient and therefore disposable."
He shrugs. "Very well. I claim you, little short person, as my new familiar. Your new name is Meatshield. You must immediately practice reading my thoughts and responding to my subtle telepathic cues, such as the cue to hurl yourself upon the blades of my foes thereby stalling their attacks."
"See, this is where we always run into semantic difficulties. When 'play' means 'insert reproductive apparatus into any female you meet' -- of course I don't like to 'play' with girls. I'm saving myself for the right woman. Specifically one able to provide me with godlike power at no peril to my immortal soul."
"Oh, reeeeally," says Palindrome with a sly look, "Then I apologize for calling you Cookie Mugger. Your new name is Expendable Joe. And I need a cucumber sandwich with no crusts POST HASTE! CHOP CHOP!"
Atriden
First Post
Atreus seems to like palindromes little show and even pull's forth a little chair to enjoy it. When the display ends, he says " Perhaps you should become a puppet master, it would suits you in many ways. Don't worry, I wont touch your things or your pockets. I don't want to find anything unpleasant, like a brain or other squishy body parts. "
Expendable Joe nod's and leaves the room. After a short while he returns with a cucumber sandwich with no crusts as Palindrome ordered. He gives palindrome the sandwich on a plate with a bottle of red wine " I thought some good wine would be appropriate with the sandwich. I carefully selected one of Dod's finest ". Atreus goes back to the armchair to relax and then turns to face Palindrome " Enjoy "
[sblock=OOC]If Palindrome decides to take a bite of the sandwich, he actually tastes a pretty decent sandwich but suddenly he discovers that there is more to it. Suddenly his mouth starts to burn and sting, and it is unbearable. You need something to drink, and fast! And there you stand with a bottle of red wine in your hand. Do you dare to drink it? Well if you do, I hope you like vinegar mixed with wine.[/sblock]
Expendable Joe nod's and leaves the room. After a short while he returns with a cucumber sandwich with no crusts as Palindrome ordered. He gives palindrome the sandwich on a plate with a bottle of red wine " I thought some good wine would be appropriate with the sandwich. I carefully selected one of Dod's finest ". Atreus goes back to the armchair to relax and then turns to face Palindrome " Enjoy "
[sblock=OOC]If Palindrome decides to take a bite of the sandwich, he actually tastes a pretty decent sandwich but suddenly he discovers that there is more to it. Suddenly his mouth starts to burn and sting, and it is unbearable. You need something to drink, and fast! And there you stand with a bottle of red wine in your hand. Do you dare to drink it? Well if you do, I hope you like vinegar mixed with wine.[/sblock]
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covaithe
Explorer
As Atreus is returning with the sandwich, Doddoddod's rolling voice can be heard echoing through the halls as if from the bottom of a stairwell, getting closer. There is someone with him. As they get closer, their voices become clearer.
"...sure it's been sold by now and is probably on its way to Hzaka, but if you can find me the thief and recover the money he got for it, you can take whatever you see fit as a finder's fee from it. The Catchment was worth at least a thousand gold."
"Very well, I accept your terms. Fear not, old friend; you have acquired the services of Doddoddod, and no mere thief will evade his eyes for long."
Doddoddod's voice is halting and out of breath as he answers, due no doubt to the stairs. He opens the door to the room, ushering in Marco, the hunchbacked halfling shopkeeper, and carefully folds a piece of gray silk around a shard of thick glass smeared with blood, finally tucking it into a leather bag and securing it in an inner pocket of his voluminous robe.
"Ah, Palindrome. You've met my apprentice, haven't you Marco? Promising lad, if only he would apply himself. And Atreus, you're here, too. Good, good. How are you gentlemen faring in that delicate matter entrusted to us by Lady Glasston?" The fat wizard's eyes drift expectantly to Marco has he drops Lady Glasston's name, but Marco doesn't seem to notice. Nor does he pay any particular attention to Palindrome.
"...sure it's been sold by now and is probably on its way to Hzaka, but if you can find me the thief and recover the money he got for it, you can take whatever you see fit as a finder's fee from it. The Catchment was worth at least a thousand gold."
"Very well, I accept your terms. Fear not, old friend; you have acquired the services of Doddoddod, and no mere thief will evade his eyes for long."
Doddoddod's voice is halting and out of breath as he answers, due no doubt to the stairs. He opens the door to the room, ushering in Marco, the hunchbacked halfling shopkeeper, and carefully folds a piece of gray silk around a shard of thick glass smeared with blood, finally tucking it into a leather bag and securing it in an inner pocket of his voluminous robe.
"Ah, Palindrome. You've met my apprentice, haven't you Marco? Promising lad, if only he would apply himself. And Atreus, you're here, too. Good, good. How are you gentlemen faring in that delicate matter entrusted to us by Lady Glasston?" The fat wizard's eyes drift expectantly to Marco has he drops Lady Glasston's name, but Marco doesn't seem to notice. Nor does he pay any particular attention to Palindrome.
"Why, thank you, Expendable Joe," says Palindrome in a magnamanious tone.
The wizard turns to the halfling. "Oh, Meatshield...."
He snaps his fingers. "Part of your duties as familiar include tasting my food."
"Eat."
"Now."
Palindrome's eyes light up at the mention of the value of the floating quill. "A thousand?!" he mouths silently in wonderment and delight, causing the feather to vanish into his sub-pocket.
He pulls out his notebook and begins calculating which enchantments are approximately worth one thousand gold.
He seems to be drooling.
"We found a naked dead chick, master."
"It was awesome."
[sblock=It's going to be a busy night...]Since we're up past Doddoddod's bedtime (i.e. after mid-afternoon), the old fart will go to sleep in a bit. Palindrome will slip back on the amulet, steal the bit of glass (which shouldn't be too hard since Doddoddod makes Palindrome empty the pockets of all his clothing and sort the contents, then take the clothing to the laundry--hopefully it won't involve clipping Dod*3's toenails or picking the bits of food out of his beard), clean the glass, snag some demon blood from Doddoddod's lab, smear the demon blood on the glass, put the glass into Doddoddod's 'evidence closet' (also known as the 'Closet of Things He Will Eventually Get To In a Year or So'), and get back to the business of...
- Sewing the bag of holding into the overalls.
- Divining the feather's magical properties.
- Resting and memorizing sleep.
[sblock=Note to GM]Don't forget: Marco was hightailing it out of town because of the 'mass murders' associated with the Screamer.[/sblock]
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Atriden
First Post
A bit disapointed that Palindrome didn't eat his sandwhich right away he now turns his attention to Doddoddod " Good to see you aswell mr. Doddoddod " and Atreus makes a small bow
" Please elaborate on the dead woman whom you speak of? I was under the impression that this was a simple task, not a murder case " he says with a hint of sarcasm in his tone.
" Please elaborate on the dead woman whom you speak of? I was under the impression that this was a simple task, not a murder case " he says with a hint of sarcasm in his tone.
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