The Funnier Moments (Updated 12/8/04)

[Jeff Wilder]

In The Banewarrens, one PC and an animal companion were turned to stone. (I can't remember exactly how, but it's not important.) The wizard was multiclassed, so once they obtained scrolls of stone to flesh, he wasn't high enough level to cast them himself without a mishap chance. He freed the bear, which made its saving throw, but, yes, needing a 3 or higher, he rolled a 1 on the mishap roll while trying to de-stone the PC. I ruled that the spell backfired on him, but granted him a +2 to the save, giving it a DC of 2. He rolled a 1.

So back the party treks to Ptolus, where they convince an NPC, at great expense, to immediately come cast stone to flesh on their trapped wizard. They lay guidance and resistance on the wizard, so once he's de-stoned he, again, needs a 2 to make his "system shock" save. He rolls a 1 and dies. As an independent event, the mishap and its consequences were a 1 in 4000 chance.

That wasn't so much funny as it was depressing. The Banewarrens is a chew-you-up adventure on its own, so bad luck like that is just a back-breaker. We eventually gave up on the module, skipping ahead in time. The PCs refer to their time spent in Ptolus as "the Dark Time," and avoid speaking of it. Truthfully, none of them are exactly sure what happened, except that the Banewarren's evil has been released and is slowly spreading across the land. (To be handled once they finish Black Sails Over Freeport ... )

 

[Jeff Wilder]

But I think he just wanted to give the poor player one last chance to have his ranger live and made a judgement call. He rolled the dice in front of us and everything...

Yeah, I figured and can respect that. I was just being pedantic. You probably missed it because it's so rare on EN World.


Jeff

 

[Tatsukun]

Well, our party;
1- Valec (rhymes with Phallic) the greatsword guy (fighter 8, Cleric of St. Cuthbert 1)
2- Jabez (Wizard 9)
3- Toren (Cleric of Pelor 8)
4- Marius (Barbarian 2, Fighter 4, Champion of Gwynharwyf 3)
5- Hedgehog the Halfling (Fighter 4, Rogue 4)

We were doing "Return to the Temple of Elemental Evil', and we were in a bad fight. It was close to a TPK when we left off our game. Marius and Hedgehog were fighting a big giant, Toren and Jabez were out of spells and Valec was down. We asked the DM what Valec looked like (dead or unconscious). Valec's player said he was dead. We finished there.

Before the next game, Valec's player noticed that he had made a mistake and Valec was actually alive but unconscious. The DM ruled that he looked dead to us and that we could not check (because we would not normally check if he looked dead).

Then the odd things started…

We actually won the fight and wanted to keep adventuring a little before going back to town. But, nobody could carry Valec's "Dead body". We thought about dragging it, kicking it along, even putting it in a bag of holding (Think "Weekend at Berny's").

The plan was to cast rope trick and prop the body up against a wall, like a scarecrow. But, we just ended up teleporting back to town.

Finally, we found some trouble, and Toren died (for real). We go back to town and go to the Church of Pelor. They raise Toren. We go to the church of St. Cuthbert. They take our money and cast raise dead. Now, keep in mind that nobody has been allowed to notice that Valec is not dead. The spell fails.

At that point Marius demands the money back and a shouting match ensues. Intimidate checks are made, and the clerics attack the party (driving off Marius and Jabez and capturing Hedgehog).

The party runs and gets the guards who suddenly pummel the PC's and throw them in jail. Later, the party pays for Valec to be raised (again) and it works (as Valec has died in the interim). We also find that Marius has been cursed (-4 to attacks, saves and skills) and must made a sacrifice to the Temple of Elemental Evil to remove it, which will violate his Champion of Gwynharwyf vows).

It's not really a joke kind of thing, it's more of a comedy of errors. Odd session

-Tatsu

 

[Tatsukun]

Another odd one. I was DM'ing a group in 3.5. I was using a random treasure generator, and it made "+2 sling stone, 1). So, I put it in. The party thought it was an ioun stone for a long time, then identified it and there were groans all around.

Later, the monk (3rd level) used it, criticaled and killed a BBEG.

It just goes to show you, anything can happen!

-Tatsu

 

[GravyFingerz]

Updated 12/8/04 with a new story, called The Bard's Shining Moment. Not so much funny as really cool

 

[Zappo]

So I'm playing an astral deva in a game where we're trying to destroy some cultists of an evil god. These cultists have invaded a town and raised some zombies to work in the nearby mines. My character, being a bit Old Testament style and more keen on punishing than forgiving, would like nothing more than putting the fear of God in these cultists and then smiting them.

A premise about how the scene worked. An astral deva of my level can cast Invisibility Sphere, and he can also surround himself with a halo of light which works as a powerful magic circle against evil, and also as a lesser globe of invulnerability. This means that 3rd-level or lower spell effects are suppressed, including the invisibility sphere. This particular deva, thanks to a few setting-specific rules, could also turn weak undead; he's powerful enough to destroy 1-HD creatures utterly, but not much more.

So I enter the mines while invisible and locate the main cave. A half dozen priests are watching ten zombies that are working the mine. Invisibly, I place myself in the middle of the room and fly a meter or so above the ground...

Suddenly, the cave is flooded by light. Before the priests can even turn to see what's happening, almost all of the zombies crumble to dust and piles of dried flesh. A heavenly being, clad in silver-gold armor and wielding an engraved warhammer, stands in mid-air in the center of the cave. The voice of the deva fills the mine: "The gods of light will not suffer your works any longer. The day of judgement has come for your kind. Repent now, or burn forever!"

Four of the priests take their maces and charge the angel; their efforts are entirely useless, for as soon as they come close they feel themselves being repelled by the creature's aura of sanctity. Their attacks all miss, save for one - which the deva completely ignores. Not even a scratch or a bruise is left on the celestial flesh. The fifth priest comes close and intones a prayer to his dark god, asking for the power to cast a minor curse. The deva makes no attempt to stop him, but the priests' grin turns into an astonished look as the spell produces no effect at all, without apparent reason. "Your god has abandoned you." The celestial states this as a fact. His voices conveys the tone of inevitability. There will be no fight. There will be no hope for the wicked.

The priests flee in panic, and those that don't kill themselves over common mine hazards get out and warn the rest of the cult. Half of the cult's forces immediately pour into the mines, but when they arrive in the cave, there is no trace of the celestial. A low noise, however, is echoing through the mine, growing louder and louder...

A minute later, the entire mine collapses, killing or burying alive all the cultists within. Out from the airborne dirt exploding from the entrance, the celestial walks away, unharmed.

---

The mechanics of this should be pretty evident, though I also had some serious luck with the dice. In the surprise round, I activated the aura as a free action, suppressing the invisibility, and turned undead. The priests were unable to hit me due to my high AC and the penalty from the double-strength magic circle against evil. One did hit, but his damage was fully negated by damage resistance. The priest tried to cast bestow curse, but he was within the magic circle and nothing happened (bestow curse is 3rd level for clerics). Then my turn arrived, and I figured that, since the priests had been unable to harm me even when hitting, and they had just seen their spell mysteriously fail, I had a great chance of completely destroying their morale. So I roll Intimidate - and a whopping 31 comes out. The rest, as they say, is history, invisibility, high explosive and damage resistance.

 

[DarkSoldier]

Zappo, that is awesomeness personified!