The Hobbit in Limbo: No Mo Del Toro

[Goodsport]

How about Michael Bay?


-G

 

[Dannyalcatraz]

I think having so few source-material reasons to have things explode- with the possible exceptions of the effects of Smaug's atttacks- would simply drive him insane.

As a result, we'd wind up with some horrible mish-mash of his past films, so Smaug would be some kind of Decepticon, Bilbo would be played by Martin Lawrence, and the city Smaug attacks would be a fortified island with all kinds of alchemical weapons on it...

 

[RigaMortus2]

I don't think Uwe Boll is doing anything. Maybe get him to direct?

 

[ssampier]

I think having so few source-material reasons to have things explode- with the possible exceptions of the effects of Smaug's atttacks- would simply drive him insane.

As a result, we'd wind up with some horrible mish-mash of his past films, so Smaug would be some kind of Decepticon, Bilbo would be played by Martin Lawrence, and the city Smaug attacks would be a fortified island with all kinds of alchemical weapons on it...

That sounds like a good movie idea!

However, don't call it the Hobbit.

Bad Dragon Island?

 

[Dannyalcatraz]

Actually, I think Michael Bay would recast that movie. Martin Lawrence simply isn't up to the job.

I'm thinking...Ice Cube. Not only can he play Bilbo a bit more convincingly (being a bit rounder of face, etc.), he could deliver the soundtrack, especially if he hooks up with Dr. Dre again.

Gandalf? Samuel L. Jackson...in whiteface!

Thorin? Danny DeVito.

Smaug could be voiced by James Earl Jones...but that would be too obvious. And Sean Connery has been down that road already. Perhaps they could electronically string together the relevant syllables from the performances of Don LaFontaine and process it a bit to make it more...dragon-y.

 

[Plane Sailing]

how about michael bay?

aaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrggggggggggghhhhhhhh!

 

[Deset Gled]

...what is Terry Gilliam doing these days?

I still have not forgiven Terry Gilliam for Tideland.

How about Joss Whedon?

I'd wonder what the Hobbit would look like if John Carpenter or Clive Barker took a whack at it?

 

[Phaezen]

According to Ian McKellen's twitter feed the sets and scripts for the Hobbit are ready and casting is happening this month. No mention of director though.

Twitter / Ian McKellen: "Hobbit" sets are ready, s ...

Twitter / Ian McKellen: The films will get made. I ...

 

[Mark]

What a great guy to twitter such a salve for the fans.

 

[Dannyalcatraz]

How about Joss Whedon?

I'm not ready for hobbits cursing in Chinese and Orcs disappearing in puffs of smoke.

John Carpenter

Bilbo would have an eyepatch and Smaug would be a shapeshifter.

Clive Barker

The One Ring would be black & gold and would be mutable in form. Gandalf would have pins sticking out of his hat, and his robes would be leather.