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We D&D- Tyranny of Dragons Part 2: The Rise of Tiamat #24b Strike Team 1 Part 2 A Ton of Undead.
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<blockquote data-quote="Goonalan" data-source="post: 7954006" data-attributes="member: 16069"><p style="text-align: center"><strong>We D&D.</strong></p><p></p><p><strong>Session #55b The Rise of Tiamat #14b Hefty with War Phallus and Plentiful Loving Sack.</strong></p><p><strong></strong></p><p><strong>Brothers of the First Light.</strong></p><p><strong>Lummins (played by Rob) Male Half-Elf Cleric of Lathander Lvl 11</strong></p><p><strong>Lux (played by Sandy) Female Human Warlock Lvl 11</strong></p><p><strong>Watt (played by Jackie) Male Human Bard Lvl 11</strong></p><p><strong>Sgt Bobby Markguth (played by Pete) Male Human Fighter Lvl 11</strong></p><p><strong>&</strong></p><p><strong>Hotlips Houlihan (played by Sandy) Female Halfling Rogue Lvl 11</strong></p><p><strong></strong></p><p><strong>Secondary PCs.</strong></p><p><strong>Left at 8th Level- we’ll get them back if (and when) they’re needed later on.</strong></p><p><strong>Derek Pilch (played by Jackie) Male Human Druid Lvl 8</strong></p><p><strong>Hard Bonk (played by Rob) Male Half-Orc Monk Lvl 8</strong></p><p><strong>Sgt Harald Hardaxe (played by Pete) Male Shield Dwarf Fighter Lvl 8</strong></p><p></p><p>This is session #55 of our game, but only session #14b of The Rise of Tiamat scenario.</p><p></p><p>Earlier in the session, actually right at the very start, Lux (Sandy) told the other Players (and me, of course- I always listen in to their little pre-game chats) that one of things they needed to get done was to investigate the Green Dragon Mask. So, I had my hands full- I’m trying to avoid this happening, I don’t want them to figure out ahead of time that the Mask is a fake.</p><p></p><p>Although, I had a back-up plan if they discovered the lie- but back-up plans are never as good.</p><p></p><p>Also, in this session is a whole chunk of Plot I was levering in, so sorry about that- explanation follows, way below.</p><p></p><p>So (after Pizza), and we’re back in Waterdeep, and immediately into action- well, I am at least- scrambling, again (a little), to prevent the PCs from thoroughly investigating the (fake) Green Dragon Mask.</p><p></p><p>The subject of discussion in the mid-session food break is spells, and their uses- after the last level up (11th) several of the PCs have discovered a slew of divination spells (and similar) that they could be employing. Lummins (played by Rob) reads out (in entirety) mostly through mouthfuls of cheese crust (classy) a variety of spells, including- Commune, Legend Lore, Scry, Planar Ally- and the list goes on. Soon after all of the spellcasters are on it. Why hadn’t they thought to do this before? Is the oft asked enquiry.</p><p></p><p>So, I’m scrambling, like I say- but I’ve come prepared.</p><p></p><p>Yes, the PCs can use any or all of the above spells but, not yet- we’re in Waterdeep and there’s an arrival committee. Actually, less of a committee, more of a well-armed and armoured flock- the Waterdeep Griffon Cavalry are out in force to welcome the Flying Lighthouse home, and to bring Laeral Silverhand (Open Lord of Waterdeep, and head of the Council of Waterdeep) on board.</p><p></p><p>And we’re off and running again, here’s the story- Laeral is overjoyed to see the Brothers of the First Light once more, and to learn that they’ve secured the Green Dragon Mask, and slain the great Green Dragon- Chuth, and the unnamed Wyrmspeaker Cult leader-type (that’s the story King M and the PCs are going with). But… all of that can wait for a while- the Brothers of the First Light are late and for a very important date, as it turns out.</p><p></p><p>Laeral informs the Brothers that there’s a gala ceremony taking place- right now- at Castle Waterdeep, to celebrate the times and trials of the rescued Ice Hunters from Oyaviggaton. Which is universally met with replies of- “What now?”, or similar with added swear words (thanks Pete & Jackie).</p><p></p><p>I remind the PCs (and you the reader) that at the last meeting of the Council of Waterdeep, they (the PCs) asked that the Ice Hunters receive some sort of reward/helping-hand, this mainly because Lummins (Rob) was still feeling really bad about killing half of them.</p><p></p><p>Well, this is it- the Ice Hunter’s reward, exactly what the PCs asked for.</p><p></p><p>The Players are still not impressed- “Do we have to go?”</p><p></p><p>Yes, as it turns out because they are the guests of honour, and furthermore all of them have to give a speech- that’s right, a sure-fire way of getting PCs/Players off the scent (if you can swing it) is to make them do some work for a bloody change. So, the guys have twenty minutes (or-so) to come up with 100-200 words each, then it’s all aboard the Griffons and onto Castle Waterdeep, just in time for their orations.</p><p></p><p>They hate me at times, I can feel it.</p><p></p><p>Actually, some of them just tell me to my face.</p><p></p><p>Pete (Sgt Bobby) really isn’t happy- good, Lady Laeral Silverhand makes sure he knows that he’s last to the podium- the finale, and therefore the star of the show, and he’ll be giving an award to the hero of the hour- that’s right, the mighty Orcaheart.</p><p></p><p>So, it’s smiles all round, particularly as the rest of the Players have now assumed their default positions- laughing at a fuming Pete. But the Players all comply- mostly because they buy into this charade and are prepared to put up with my t(r)eacherous madness. The Players therefore scribble their mostly trite (although some are also backhandedly insulting) ‘thanks’ to the Ice Hunters (and specifically Orcaheart, get that Pete) and then we fly.</p><p></p><p>Just to say Pete really liked Orcaheart when he first got to know him, this after he beat the big lad down (sorta, thanks to Lummins’ Radiance of the Dawn) back at Oyaviggaton in the Ice Hunter settlement. He thought he had a bond with the big-boned Ice Hunter, or else the man-mountain followed Sgt Bobby around like a lost puppy. Then Orcaheart stole his thunder by keeping the White Dragon, Old White Death at bay, basically the Ice Hunter did the Fighter’s job for him- what’s the fuss all about, anyone can do this.</p><p></p><p>So, Pete’s doubly unhappy- which, of course, makes my heart sing.</p><p></p><p>Next up Castle Waterdeep and the Ice Hunter Gala, apparently the survivors of Oyaviggaton are being given houses and jobs in Waterdeep, and some form of recognition (a state pension, of sorts). It’s all very liberal and modern in the City of Splendours apparently, or else the PCs are being bought off some more.</p><p></p><p>Anyway, everyone’s here- or else lots of the big-wigs including a few members of the Council of Waterdeep (Lady Laeral Silverhand, Ontharr Frume, Delaan Winterhound & Sir Isteval), and the adjoining Waterdhavian nobility et al. There’s a buffet and entertainment- the latter mostly coming courtesy of the PCs, who arrive fashionably late to the soiree and are on stage moments later.</p><p></p><p>Speeches- delivered presentation style (as in standing before me, your glorious DM, and the other Players). It goes a little like this-</p><p></p><p>Laeral introduces each of the PCs, there’s loud whooping from the crowd (me and the other Players) the biggest cheer is of course saved for when Sgt Bobby comes on- because we all know he’s going to say something bad.</p><p></p><p>First up is Lummins (Rob) the self-proclaimed High Priest of Lathander (the ‘Shining Light, if you will’) who’s all contrition and soft-soap (in translation- ‘I didn’t mean to do it- to kill the rest of your families’). He’s very sorry- mixed in with the 200-or-so word apology are several adverts for the Light of Lathander, he never gives it a rest.</p><p></p><p>Next comes Hotlips, who contrary to the DMs instructions (but Sandy’s playing two PCs so I’ll let her off) hasn’t really got a speech, the Halfling Rogue instead goes a little Bill & Ted, recommending (repeatedly) that those present ‘be excellent to each other’. Still, it’s lots funnier than Lummins’ weaselling effort.</p><p></p><p>Then comes Lux (also played by Sandy) her speech doesn’t mention the Ice Hunters (or Orcaheart) once, instead it concentrates on the actions of the Brothers of the First Light, and specifically the group’s (self-proclaimed) leader- yeah, that’s right- Lux talks about how great Lux is. Or else tells the Brother’s tale while all the time emphasising the great decisions/orders/spells/actions/etc. she contributed to the cause. Basically, Lux is carrying the others- it’s actually a great speech (in-character). The other Players are not sure whether to applaud or to hiss and boo her.</p><p></p><p>We move on…</p><p></p><p>To Watt (played by Jackie), and another great speech- and I mean a properly great speech- a bit of Churchillian sounding “we shall never surrender”, a bit about Orcaheart and his titanic effort keeping Old White Death from eating the rest of the party. The finale a cross between Nike’s ‘just do it’, and Coke’s ‘we are the world’. I swear I heard Pete blow his nose (and dab at his moistening eyes). It’s a great effort and brings the house down.</p><p></p><p>Which just leaves Sgt Bobby (or as he has become known to me, you and everyone that has ever met him- ‘bloody hell, it’s Pete’).</p><p></p><p>So, strap in, because Sgt Bobby/Pete is grinning as he steps up to the (imaginary) podium to do his thing, and more than a little drunk (or else he’s acting the part, for insurance reasons). The speech starts well, mostly a recap of events- emphasising Orcaheart’s bravery and courage et al- although indicating to the audience throughout that the Ice Hunter hero was just subbing for him. Eventually we get to the crux of it- which is, if he was there (Sgt B) then Old White Death wouldn’t have got away from the gang. In summary- the fat lad did well, but I do it better.</p><p></p><p>Then, as he has the stage to himself, Sgt Bobby decides to say a few more (less than helpful, but entirely in character- for Pete) things. In precis- he tells everyone how great he is some more, calls Lux a few names, lets everyone know that he heartily approves of Hotlips (‘she’s a menace, and I like that’- is I think how he put it), forgets to mention entirely Lummins or Watt, and then lays in to Orcaheart a bit- ‘a fat freak who got lucky’, or something very similar. Remarkably he refrains from swearing- which, I think, is progress.</p><p></p><p>Obviously the other Players (and me) hiss, cheer and clap at all the appropriate points- some of us may have even goaded him on a little (well, I like to stir the pot every now and then- in truth they’re all getting on so well these days- there’s hardly any verbal spats or sulking any more).</p><p></p><p>Laeral Silverhand has to step in towards the end of Sgt Bobby’s oration, but he manages not to go too far with it, which is fortunate because next up… yep, there’s a next up- as it turns out Sgt Bobby isn’t the star of the show, is… the Ice Hunter’s response.</p><p></p><p>Bonecarver says a few words (actually very few) the Ice Hunter chief (& Shaman) is still not very happy it seems, gracious- thanks for all the help and that, but not delighted to be in Waterdeep- with a much reduced clan, and away from the place he calls home (Bonecarver is a Druid in a city, remember- and he’s watching his tribe disintegrate). I keep it short, mostly just a surly ‘thanks’.</p><p></p><p>Which brings us to Orcaheart- the real finale, who has leant a few more words of the Common tongue, I wrote a speech you see.</p><p></p><p>All of it, of course, in praise of the heroes- the Brothers of the First Light- Watt’s “wiseness beyond the ancients”, Hotlips is described as a “stab-stab-smiley-sneaky-bastard”, while Lummins (and Lathander) are “the Light of No-Ledge, and Underhanging, and all that is very much Holy (sic)”, while Lux is “fiery with bastard-clever-eyes”. Then Orcaheart gets to the great man, Sgt Bobby, the rest of his speech (actually about 50% of it) is a semi-homo-erotic paean to the magnificent beast that is Sgt B. Key phrases include- “I very much admiring his manly thighs”, and, “he is like god of war and lovely in one big chunky breast”, and, “he is hefty with war phallus and plentiful loving sack”, and finally, “he is like walrus-man, like walrus-man-beast- he is engorged Beachmaster!”, the latter is repeated (often) and at increasing volume (mostly by the other Players). It’s all delivered in a strange pidgin Common (actually cod Russian/English in-game).</p><p></p><p>There is much hilarity.</p><p></p><p>I get by far the biggest laugh, by far far- then again it took me about an hour (over a period of a week) to write the 500 or so words of Orcaheart’s speech.</p><p></p><p>Then, after the Players finally admit to actually enjoying this short interlude, two strange-ish things take place.</p><p></p><p>First up, Sgt Bobby gets to meet Orcaheart’s sister, that’s right- you heard me, Orcaheart has got a sister. Remember Orcaheart is a seven-foot-tall sumo sized fellow. His sister however is a young, raven-haired beauty, petite but with a full figure, and she’s all over Sgt B like a rash. Her name is Elsa (like in Frozen).</p><p></p><p>I just want to say that around the table (even for oldies like us) its slightly odd (as a DM) when you’re trying to roleplay a femme fatale, who is attempting to pick up your real life ‘best mate’, when all the while his wife is watching on. Alternatively, tense, and then (thank god) hilarious- there were some awkward moments to be had here, but I braved it out- and Pete went for it.</p><p></p><p>Good, that’s a bit of Plot done, we’ll come back to this in a bit.</p><p></p><p>Although…</p><p></p><p>But, while we’re at it have you noticed in this write up previously that Bonecarver (the Ice Hunter Shaman who became chief when the PCs (actually Hotlips) <s>killed</s> assassinated the previous chief- Barking Seal) has always been a bit of a grump. While the Ice Hunters have been aboard the Flying Lighthouse I have given the PCs plenty of opportunities to talk with them, or else for the PCs to involve the Ice Hunters in some way in their ongoing plans. This stuff mostly took place during the Downtime sessions, although I have presented the PCs with the option to meet with Bonecarver several times, they’ve always been too busy doing other things. So, and whisper this because it’s also Plot-related.</p><p></p><p>Orcaheart isn’t an Ice Hunter, he’s not part of the tribe- neither is his sister, Elsa. The pair turned up one cold day in Oyaviggaton, about six months before the PCs put in their appearance (and wrecked the place). So, Orcaheart (& Elsa) show up- the big lad challenges, and then kills, the previous Tribal Champion, and then claims the position for himself. At the time a few of the tribe’s Warriors were less than happy about this situation- so, Orcaheart killed a few of them too. At which point Barking Seal (now RIP) declared Orcaheart to officially be the Tribal Champion. The then chief and Bonecarver figured out between them that Orcaheart (and his sister) were Old White Death’s eyes and ears, the pair are agents of the Dragon.</p><p></p><p>If any of the PCs had taken time to get to know Bonecarver (or any of the other Ice Hunters, probably), well… some of this (undoubtedly) would have come to light, but it didn’t… so, I’m running with it.</p><p></p><p>Oh, and last bit- Orcaheart wasn’t/isn’t working for the Dragon- Old White Death.</p><p></p><p>The big lad has a much nastier boss.</p><p></p><p>You’ll see.</p><p></p><p>And…</p><p></p><p>The other strange thing that happens is that Ambassador Connerad Brawnanvil, complete with entourage- jogging to catch up, makes an appearance- just as the party is coming to a close. The surly Dwarf however is frantic, desperate in fact to ‘hire’ the Brothers of the First Light- the story is Connerad’s (only) brother is in trouble big- he’s the Chief Engineer at Boltus Pit, a massive coaling station in the Spine of the World Mountains, about fifty miles north of Mirabar.</p><p></p><p>Connerad’s brother- Argonite Brawnanvil is also a Priest of Dumathoin (the Keeper of Secrets under the Mountain- every Dwarven miner’s favourite deity), anyway Connerad received a Sending message from Argonite- “Mine attacked- taken? Slaughterhouse- Dragon Cultists, we retreat Deep Forge Nine- come quickly, my brother. Stone Circle west working. Beware much Danger. Quickly- they come.”</p><p></p><p>Connerad further explains that ‘Stone Circle West’ refers to an ancient (& permanent) Dwarven Teleport Circle (yes, Dwarves hate magic but sometimes it’s just easier to Teleport places rather than trek for days through snows, ice and hazard) about three miles outside of the back door to Boltus Pit. He further explains the location, he thinks, of Deep Forge Nine- and everything else he thinks the Brothers need to know.</p><p></p><p>However, the Brothers haven’t said that they’re going yet, actually Connerad hasn’t got around to asking them- he just presumed. Ten seconds later however and the deal is done- Connerad will agree to anything, and everything, within reason- certainly his full support at the Council of Waterdeep, if only the PCs will rescue his brother- NOW.</p><p></p><p>Obviously, there’s a Dwarven Mage on hand to make this happen (in a quiet room away from prying eyes).</p><p></p><p>The PCs are, of course, up for it and less than five minutes later en route, and ready for more action- they love their fighting.</p><p></p><p>Oh, but it’s 2 AM when the PCs depart, the third Council of Waterdeep is in 7 hours’ time, at 9 AM. So, they’re against the clock- and quite frankly loving that too.</p><p></p><p>That however is the end of this session (another short one- we didn’t get much done), although nicely set up for the start of the next. Just to note in the intervening period- between this session and the next, two of the PCs got in contact with me to ask- “Are you trying to stop us from examining the Green Dragon Mask?” To which I replied “No, of course not…” and then, when pressed- “Yes, I am- will you please play along?”</p><p></p><p>They’re good people my Players, salt of the Earth- certainly co-conspirators, although tbh there’s very little Green Dragon Mask divining they can do know- it’s going to be all action until the start of the third Council of Waterdeep, that’s a guarantee.</p><p></p><p>See you next time.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Goonalan, post: 7954006, member: 16069"] [CENTER][B]We D&D.[/B][/CENTER] [B]Session #55b The Rise of Tiamat #14b Hefty with War Phallus and Plentiful Loving Sack. Brothers of the First Light. Lummins (played by Rob) Male Half-Elf Cleric of Lathander Lvl 11 Lux (played by Sandy) Female Human Warlock Lvl 11 Watt (played by Jackie) Male Human Bard Lvl 11 Sgt Bobby Markguth (played by Pete) Male Human Fighter Lvl 11 & Hotlips Houlihan (played by Sandy) Female Halfling Rogue Lvl 11 Secondary PCs. Left at 8th Level- we’ll get them back if (and when) they’re needed later on. Derek Pilch (played by Jackie) Male Human Druid Lvl 8 Hard Bonk (played by Rob) Male Half-Orc Monk Lvl 8 Sgt Harald Hardaxe (played by Pete) Male Shield Dwarf Fighter Lvl 8[/B] This is session #55 of our game, but only session #14b of The Rise of Tiamat scenario. Earlier in the session, actually right at the very start, Lux (Sandy) told the other Players (and me, of course- I always listen in to their little pre-game chats) that one of things they needed to get done was to investigate the Green Dragon Mask. So, I had my hands full- I’m trying to avoid this happening, I don’t want them to figure out ahead of time that the Mask is a fake. Although, I had a back-up plan if they discovered the lie- but back-up plans are never as good. Also, in this session is a whole chunk of Plot I was levering in, so sorry about that- explanation follows, way below. So (after Pizza), and we’re back in Waterdeep, and immediately into action- well, I am at least- scrambling, again (a little), to prevent the PCs from thoroughly investigating the (fake) Green Dragon Mask. The subject of discussion in the mid-session food break is spells, and their uses- after the last level up (11th) several of the PCs have discovered a slew of divination spells (and similar) that they could be employing. Lummins (played by Rob) reads out (in entirety) mostly through mouthfuls of cheese crust (classy) a variety of spells, including- Commune, Legend Lore, Scry, Planar Ally- and the list goes on. Soon after all of the spellcasters are on it. Why hadn’t they thought to do this before? Is the oft asked enquiry. So, I’m scrambling, like I say- but I’ve come prepared. Yes, the PCs can use any or all of the above spells but, not yet- we’re in Waterdeep and there’s an arrival committee. Actually, less of a committee, more of a well-armed and armoured flock- the Waterdeep Griffon Cavalry are out in force to welcome the Flying Lighthouse home, and to bring Laeral Silverhand (Open Lord of Waterdeep, and head of the Council of Waterdeep) on board. And we’re off and running again, here’s the story- Laeral is overjoyed to see the Brothers of the First Light once more, and to learn that they’ve secured the Green Dragon Mask, and slain the great Green Dragon- Chuth, and the unnamed Wyrmspeaker Cult leader-type (that’s the story King M and the PCs are going with). But… all of that can wait for a while- the Brothers of the First Light are late and for a very important date, as it turns out. Laeral informs the Brothers that there’s a gala ceremony taking place- right now- at Castle Waterdeep, to celebrate the times and trials of the rescued Ice Hunters from Oyaviggaton. Which is universally met with replies of- “What now?”, or similar with added swear words (thanks Pete & Jackie). I remind the PCs (and you the reader) that at the last meeting of the Council of Waterdeep, they (the PCs) asked that the Ice Hunters receive some sort of reward/helping-hand, this mainly because Lummins (Rob) was still feeling really bad about killing half of them. Well, this is it- the Ice Hunter’s reward, exactly what the PCs asked for. The Players are still not impressed- “Do we have to go?” Yes, as it turns out because they are the guests of honour, and furthermore all of them have to give a speech- that’s right, a sure-fire way of getting PCs/Players off the scent (if you can swing it) is to make them do some work for a bloody change. So, the guys have twenty minutes (or-so) to come up with 100-200 words each, then it’s all aboard the Griffons and onto Castle Waterdeep, just in time for their orations. They hate me at times, I can feel it. Actually, some of them just tell me to my face. Pete (Sgt Bobby) really isn’t happy- good, Lady Laeral Silverhand makes sure he knows that he’s last to the podium- the finale, and therefore the star of the show, and he’ll be giving an award to the hero of the hour- that’s right, the mighty Orcaheart. So, it’s smiles all round, particularly as the rest of the Players have now assumed their default positions- laughing at a fuming Pete. But the Players all comply- mostly because they buy into this charade and are prepared to put up with my t(r)eacherous madness. The Players therefore scribble their mostly trite (although some are also backhandedly insulting) ‘thanks’ to the Ice Hunters (and specifically Orcaheart, get that Pete) and then we fly. Just to say Pete really liked Orcaheart when he first got to know him, this after he beat the big lad down (sorta, thanks to Lummins’ Radiance of the Dawn) back at Oyaviggaton in the Ice Hunter settlement. He thought he had a bond with the big-boned Ice Hunter, or else the man-mountain followed Sgt Bobby around like a lost puppy. Then Orcaheart stole his thunder by keeping the White Dragon, Old White Death at bay, basically the Ice Hunter did the Fighter’s job for him- what’s the fuss all about, anyone can do this. So, Pete’s doubly unhappy- which, of course, makes my heart sing. Next up Castle Waterdeep and the Ice Hunter Gala, apparently the survivors of Oyaviggaton are being given houses and jobs in Waterdeep, and some form of recognition (a state pension, of sorts). It’s all very liberal and modern in the City of Splendours apparently, or else the PCs are being bought off some more. Anyway, everyone’s here- or else lots of the big-wigs including a few members of the Council of Waterdeep (Lady Laeral Silverhand, Ontharr Frume, Delaan Winterhound & Sir Isteval), and the adjoining Waterdhavian nobility et al. There’s a buffet and entertainment- the latter mostly coming courtesy of the PCs, who arrive fashionably late to the soiree and are on stage moments later. Speeches- delivered presentation style (as in standing before me, your glorious DM, and the other Players). It goes a little like this- Laeral introduces each of the PCs, there’s loud whooping from the crowd (me and the other Players) the biggest cheer is of course saved for when Sgt Bobby comes on- because we all know he’s going to say something bad. First up is Lummins (Rob) the self-proclaimed High Priest of Lathander (the ‘Shining Light, if you will’) who’s all contrition and soft-soap (in translation- ‘I didn’t mean to do it- to kill the rest of your families’). He’s very sorry- mixed in with the 200-or-so word apology are several adverts for the Light of Lathander, he never gives it a rest. Next comes Hotlips, who contrary to the DMs instructions (but Sandy’s playing two PCs so I’ll let her off) hasn’t really got a speech, the Halfling Rogue instead goes a little Bill & Ted, recommending (repeatedly) that those present ‘be excellent to each other’. Still, it’s lots funnier than Lummins’ weaselling effort. Then comes Lux (also played by Sandy) her speech doesn’t mention the Ice Hunters (or Orcaheart) once, instead it concentrates on the actions of the Brothers of the First Light, and specifically the group’s (self-proclaimed) leader- yeah, that’s right- Lux talks about how great Lux is. Or else tells the Brother’s tale while all the time emphasising the great decisions/orders/spells/actions/etc. she contributed to the cause. Basically, Lux is carrying the others- it’s actually a great speech (in-character). The other Players are not sure whether to applaud or to hiss and boo her. We move on… To Watt (played by Jackie), and another great speech- and I mean a properly great speech- a bit of Churchillian sounding “we shall never surrender”, a bit about Orcaheart and his titanic effort keeping Old White Death from eating the rest of the party. The finale a cross between Nike’s ‘just do it’, and Coke’s ‘we are the world’. I swear I heard Pete blow his nose (and dab at his moistening eyes). It’s a great effort and brings the house down. Which just leaves Sgt Bobby (or as he has become known to me, you and everyone that has ever met him- ‘bloody hell, it’s Pete’). So, strap in, because Sgt Bobby/Pete is grinning as he steps up to the (imaginary) podium to do his thing, and more than a little drunk (or else he’s acting the part, for insurance reasons). The speech starts well, mostly a recap of events- emphasising Orcaheart’s bravery and courage et al- although indicating to the audience throughout that the Ice Hunter hero was just subbing for him. Eventually we get to the crux of it- which is, if he was there (Sgt B) then Old White Death wouldn’t have got away from the gang. In summary- the fat lad did well, but I do it better. Then, as he has the stage to himself, Sgt Bobby decides to say a few more (less than helpful, but entirely in character- for Pete) things. In precis- he tells everyone how great he is some more, calls Lux a few names, lets everyone know that he heartily approves of Hotlips (‘she’s a menace, and I like that’- is I think how he put it), forgets to mention entirely Lummins or Watt, and then lays in to Orcaheart a bit- ‘a fat freak who got lucky’, or something very similar. Remarkably he refrains from swearing- which, I think, is progress. Obviously the other Players (and me) hiss, cheer and clap at all the appropriate points- some of us may have even goaded him on a little (well, I like to stir the pot every now and then- in truth they’re all getting on so well these days- there’s hardly any verbal spats or sulking any more). Laeral Silverhand has to step in towards the end of Sgt Bobby’s oration, but he manages not to go too far with it, which is fortunate because next up… yep, there’s a next up- as it turns out Sgt Bobby isn’t the star of the show, is… the Ice Hunter’s response. Bonecarver says a few words (actually very few) the Ice Hunter chief (& Shaman) is still not very happy it seems, gracious- thanks for all the help and that, but not delighted to be in Waterdeep- with a much reduced clan, and away from the place he calls home (Bonecarver is a Druid in a city, remember- and he’s watching his tribe disintegrate). I keep it short, mostly just a surly ‘thanks’. Which brings us to Orcaheart- the real finale, who has leant a few more words of the Common tongue, I wrote a speech you see. All of it, of course, in praise of the heroes- the Brothers of the First Light- Watt’s “wiseness beyond the ancients”, Hotlips is described as a “stab-stab-smiley-sneaky-bastard”, while Lummins (and Lathander) are “the Light of No-Ledge, and Underhanging, and all that is very much Holy (sic)”, while Lux is “fiery with bastard-clever-eyes”. Then Orcaheart gets to the great man, Sgt Bobby, the rest of his speech (actually about 50% of it) is a semi-homo-erotic paean to the magnificent beast that is Sgt B. Key phrases include- “I very much admiring his manly thighs”, and, “he is like god of war and lovely in one big chunky breast”, and, “he is hefty with war phallus and plentiful loving sack”, and finally, “he is like walrus-man, like walrus-man-beast- he is engorged Beachmaster!”, the latter is repeated (often) and at increasing volume (mostly by the other Players). It’s all delivered in a strange pidgin Common (actually cod Russian/English in-game). There is much hilarity. I get by far the biggest laugh, by far far- then again it took me about an hour (over a period of a week) to write the 500 or so words of Orcaheart’s speech. Then, after the Players finally admit to actually enjoying this short interlude, two strange-ish things take place. First up, Sgt Bobby gets to meet Orcaheart’s sister, that’s right- you heard me, Orcaheart has got a sister. Remember Orcaheart is a seven-foot-tall sumo sized fellow. His sister however is a young, raven-haired beauty, petite but with a full figure, and she’s all over Sgt B like a rash. Her name is Elsa (like in Frozen). I just want to say that around the table (even for oldies like us) its slightly odd (as a DM) when you’re trying to roleplay a femme fatale, who is attempting to pick up your real life ‘best mate’, when all the while his wife is watching on. Alternatively, tense, and then (thank god) hilarious- there were some awkward moments to be had here, but I braved it out- and Pete went for it. Good, that’s a bit of Plot done, we’ll come back to this in a bit. Although… But, while we’re at it have you noticed in this write up previously that Bonecarver (the Ice Hunter Shaman who became chief when the PCs (actually Hotlips) [S]killed[/S] assassinated the previous chief- Barking Seal) has always been a bit of a grump. While the Ice Hunters have been aboard the Flying Lighthouse I have given the PCs plenty of opportunities to talk with them, or else for the PCs to involve the Ice Hunters in some way in their ongoing plans. This stuff mostly took place during the Downtime sessions, although I have presented the PCs with the option to meet with Bonecarver several times, they’ve always been too busy doing other things. So, and whisper this because it’s also Plot-related. Orcaheart isn’t an Ice Hunter, he’s not part of the tribe- neither is his sister, Elsa. The pair turned up one cold day in Oyaviggaton, about six months before the PCs put in their appearance (and wrecked the place). So, Orcaheart (& Elsa) show up- the big lad challenges, and then kills, the previous Tribal Champion, and then claims the position for himself. At the time a few of the tribe’s Warriors were less than happy about this situation- so, Orcaheart killed a few of them too. At which point Barking Seal (now RIP) declared Orcaheart to officially be the Tribal Champion. The then chief and Bonecarver figured out between them that Orcaheart (and his sister) were Old White Death’s eyes and ears, the pair are agents of the Dragon. If any of the PCs had taken time to get to know Bonecarver (or any of the other Ice Hunters, probably), well… some of this (undoubtedly) would have come to light, but it didn’t… so, I’m running with it. Oh, and last bit- Orcaheart wasn’t/isn’t working for the Dragon- Old White Death. The big lad has a much nastier boss. You’ll see. And… The other strange thing that happens is that Ambassador Connerad Brawnanvil, complete with entourage- jogging to catch up, makes an appearance- just as the party is coming to a close. The surly Dwarf however is frantic, desperate in fact to ‘hire’ the Brothers of the First Light- the story is Connerad’s (only) brother is in trouble big- he’s the Chief Engineer at Boltus Pit, a massive coaling station in the Spine of the World Mountains, about fifty miles north of Mirabar. Connerad’s brother- Argonite Brawnanvil is also a Priest of Dumathoin (the Keeper of Secrets under the Mountain- every Dwarven miner’s favourite deity), anyway Connerad received a Sending message from Argonite- “Mine attacked- taken? Slaughterhouse- Dragon Cultists, we retreat Deep Forge Nine- come quickly, my brother. Stone Circle west working. Beware much Danger. Quickly- they come.” Connerad further explains that ‘Stone Circle West’ refers to an ancient (& permanent) Dwarven Teleport Circle (yes, Dwarves hate magic but sometimes it’s just easier to Teleport places rather than trek for days through snows, ice and hazard) about three miles outside of the back door to Boltus Pit. He further explains the location, he thinks, of Deep Forge Nine- and everything else he thinks the Brothers need to know. However, the Brothers haven’t said that they’re going yet, actually Connerad hasn’t got around to asking them- he just presumed. Ten seconds later however and the deal is done- Connerad will agree to anything, and everything, within reason- certainly his full support at the Council of Waterdeep, if only the PCs will rescue his brother- NOW. Obviously, there’s a Dwarven Mage on hand to make this happen (in a quiet room away from prying eyes). The PCs are, of course, up for it and less than five minutes later en route, and ready for more action- they love their fighting. Oh, but it’s 2 AM when the PCs depart, the third Council of Waterdeep is in 7 hours’ time, at 9 AM. So, they’re against the clock- and quite frankly loving that too. That however is the end of this session (another short one- we didn’t get much done), although nicely set up for the start of the next. Just to note in the intervening period- between this session and the next, two of the PCs got in contact with me to ask- “Are you trying to stop us from examining the Green Dragon Mask?” To which I replied “No, of course not…” and then, when pressed- “Yes, I am- will you please play along?” They’re good people my Players, salt of the Earth- certainly co-conspirators, although tbh there’s very little Green Dragon Mask divining they can do know- it’s going to be all action until the start of the third Council of Waterdeep, that’s a guarantee. See you next time. [/QUOTE]
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