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Message: <blockquote data-quote="Ruin Explorer" data-source="post: 9114723" data-attributes="member: 18">This is such a funny 1980/1990s viewpoint.Like, you're character is allowed to know how to do things you don't, like be an expert in history, religion, lockpicking, hand-to-hand combat, spellcasting, whatever, EXCEPT not talking or convincing or whatever. That's off-limits!It's also an extremely ableist PoV, and I'm sorry to say that but it straight up is ableist in the worst way because some people just aren't great talkers, some people just aren't very convincing, many of them because of being neurodiverse. I've played with players on the spectrum who had some social issues, and particularly issues role-playing entire conversations (to be clear, many others on the spectrum do not have these issues, I'm not trying to suggest that), but who often had quite good ideas for what approach their character might be taking, and if we don't have any social skills or CHA stats or the like, then they're really out in the cold.To me it's incredibly perverse than we can casually let a genuinely kind a thick guy play an INT 18 Wizard, or clumsy oaf like me play an 18 DEX lockpicking acrobat, but we can't allow someone who isn't great socially to be a smooth-tongued CHA 18 Bard.A player accidently brought this home to me with incredible clarity in like, 1992 or so, when he came to me proposing an RPG which was basically D&D but didn't have INT/WIS/CHA because all three would be down to the player and roleplaying and their plans and so on. Ever since then I cannot take anyone saying "Get rid of CHA because role-playing!" remotely seriously (ironically this was a guy who thought he had about 18 CHA and actually had about 8).The trouble is you need some kind of mechanics for moving people around the battlefield, and genuinely for grappling with people.If you don't have them, it's just entirely up to how permissive your DM is, which means it varies insanely.The Sage Advice issue isn't because there are grappling rules, it's because those rules suck.</blockquote>

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