What makes stupidity fatal?

[NoOneofConsequence]

Something a lot of people have said on the TPK thread is that TPK should only result from party stupidity (or some paraphrase of this principle). The question is, how stupid is TPK-fatality-Darwin Award-stupid?

I'm not talking about ignorance here - "Hey dude, so it's a floating ball with eyes. Doesn't sound too dangerous! What'd you call it again...a beholder?"

What I'm looking for is stories of the time the party was monumentally moronic - tell us about your dumbest moment, those times when you did something that even brain donors could see was bad.

For example, I had a 1st level character (2e) who went toe-to-toe in a battle of wills with Lord Soth after being accidentally teleported into that temple of Takhisis where all the evil dragonlords had met at one time. I even whined about being killed (I was young.).

So please, speak up.

 

[megamania]

In Darksun I had a third level Rogue think he could outwit/trick a Sorcerer-King of 50+ levels. He needed 50000mgs of asperin after the mind-bending Hamanu gave him. I went waaaaay too easy on him.

 

[Mouseferatu]

Ah, yes. The old "dumbest thing you've ever done or seen in a game." Let me hearken back to a game of 2nd edition I was running in, umm, 1994, I believe.

The party is in a large cave complex in an arctic area, and they have engaged a remorhaz in combat. Now, for those who don't, the remorhaz generates insane amounts of heat from its body.

So the paladin strikes it with a sword, and I gleefully described the sword melting.

That's an important point, so I'll restate: I specifically described the sword melting. I know everyone heard me describe the sword melting.

The next round, as the paladin reaches for a spare weapon, what does the druid do?

He wildshapes into a ram and headbutts the remorhaz!!!

It's sheer luck of the dice that he didn't die then and there, because I was absolutely not going to go easy on him. To this day, we still rib him about that...

 

[Berk]

Hmmm, never had a TPK because of player stupidity, just because of lucky rolls and all. But the most stupid thing I ever saw one of my party members do was when the wizard walked up to the nishruu (those magic eating creatures from FR) and started attacking it with a sword!!!! A mage attacked a nishruu with a sword!!!!! Needless to say he got engulfed and feebleminded and drained of almost all his magic. A mage attacked a nishruu with a sword!!!!!

 

[Enforcer]

Unfortunately, not enough things make stupidity fatal...oh you mean in gaming.

 

[Berk]

Unfortunately, not enough things make stupidity fatal...oh you mean in gaming.

Nod, I'm all for survival of the fittest. We should evoke dawinianism as a method from ages 13-22.

 

[Zappo]

So this party of adventurers is off to the deepest pit of the third layer of Pandemonium to find the Wand of Orcus (Dead Gods). To go there, they went to the second layer, where a creature has the power to send them to the Wand. The creature did so. Once there, after some unpleasant encounters, they manage to send the Wand away, away, so away that Orcus won't find it. Hurrah! Hurrah!

Do you think they thought of bringing something to come back?

 

[Umbran]

For example, I had a 1st level character (2e) who went toe-to-toe in a battle of wills with Lord Soth after being accidentally teleported into that temple of Takhisis where all the evil dragonlords had met at one time. I even whined about being killed (I was young.).

Hrr. That sounds less a matter of player stupidity as it was of DM showing off. Remember, there are no "accidents" in D&D. You cannot "accidentally teleport to a place. You can only accidentally teleport. The DM decides the place. He decided to put you into a situation you could not handle. It's not terribly reasonable to expect you to get out of that situation alive, going to to toe or not.

When the players willfully seek outy such a situation, it's stupidity. When the DM forces it upon you... well, it's frequently not what I'd call good DMing. YMMV.

 

[Hand of Evil]

MMMM, let me see...

Sleeping dragon, party member and a stick!

Player Stupid to DM: I pick up a stick.

Player two: What are you going to do with that?

Player Stupid: Poke the sleeping dragon with it.

Player two: What! Are you out of your mind? Don't.....

Player Stupid to DM: I poke the sleeping dragon in the eye with the stick!

Reason? Player Stupid wanted to see if the dragon was real!

 

[Drawmack]

8th level party to an avatar of a god

You're an ass.

TPK = 1 round.