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Who doesn't HATE Van Helsing?


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Bad, stupid movie. It meets most or all of the criteria necessary to be considered among the all-time bad.

* Essentially unlimited budget -- no excuses about how I couldn't do the effects I wanted, or shoot on the locations I wanted
* Written and directed by the same person -- clearly someone else needed to smack him once or twice and stop him from doing some of the most egregious things. A pet project gone horribly awry. Kind of a shame, since 'The Mummy' was good, the sequel was ok, and 'Deep Rising' is a guilty pleasure
* Tried way too hard to be to be too many things -- sometimes it wanted to be camp, sometimes spoof, sometimes tongue-in-cheek romp, sometimes horror, etc. A really inconsistent tone, it failed at all of them.
* Way to many things that were stupid, over the top, or just plain nonsensical when they didn't have to be. Contrast Bruce Willis using the fire hose to swing down from the roof with the Spiderman-esque swinging in Van Helsing, for example. One is over the top, but still plausible and consistent with the setting of the movie. The other is just stupid and lazy.

I saw this with a bunch of my friends (gamers and genre fans all) for my birthday last year, and every single one of us hated it. And we're the ones that just watched Highlander 2, Speed 2, and Caddyshack 2 in one sitting, so you know our tolerance for bad cinema is legendary :D
 

Perspective, dude, perspective.

Exactly.

I thought it was an ok way to spend a couple of hours. Yes, the heroin death was forced, yes the howling at the moon in the end was cheesy. Yes, fighting in high heels is probably not the best way to go about. BUT, I thought the weapons were cool, in a Deadlandsy sort of way, and I loved the vampire ball scene.
 


BryonD said:
I enjoyed the over-the-top fight stuff in the first twenty-minutes or so.
The it suddenly became a really boring dumb waste of time and just stayed there.


I agree (and I saw it for free). There were a couple of interesting things, but overall, I thought it _was_ a video game. If I wanted to watch a video game, I'd stay at home in front of my computer... blah. hated it.
 

I'm one of those that thought it was okay.

But I went in with very very (did I mention 'very'?) low expectations. (Pretty much: if they put the pointy hat on him, I was sold.)
 


Another for the "I Like it, not loved it" Chorus.

The actors did a good job, the sets were awesome, the CGI looked well done, and I enjoyed the jokes. It ended on a bit of a downer with the death of Beckinsale's character, but Richard Roxburgh's performance was FANTASTIC!!!! He chewed the scenery and stole the show, which is what a major villain is supposed to do in a film like this (Like what Wesley Snipes did with Demolition Man 15 years ago).

Something I didn't notice till jsut now -- Robbie Coltrane did Hyde's voice in this one! Excellent choice.
 

Turanil said:
Well, until now, every time someone spoke of the Van helsing movie, it was to say how awful it is.

Well, it was pretty bad but it wasn't a total waste of time. There were some good scenes with the crazy female vampires and the werewolf fight scenes. I wouldn't say I hate it; I'd probably see it again if I caught it on TV and nothing else was on.
 

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