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<blockquote data-quote="Quickbeam" data-source="post: 692232" data-attributes="member: 635"><p>Well, here it goes...</p><p></p><p>One of my favorite Kung Fu movies of all time is <em>Five Deadly Venoms</em> -- a cult classic that includes the phrase "poison clan rocks the world." How can you not like a movie with dialogue like that?!? Anyway, after seeing the list of ingredients, I really didn't want to create a story around the hydra as a monster...it just seemed too obvious and boring. So I went online and did a little reading about the <strong>Lernaean Hydra</strong>, and found a variety of stories connected to this mythical beast.</p><p></p><p>**sidebar** FWIW, I need to take issue with some of the Judge's remarks here. Incognito says that hydrae are not poisonous and that the Lernaean version grew back TWO heads for every ONE that was severed. In many of the renditions of this tale, the hydra's heads were indeed venomous. Also, some versions had one head growing back, while others had two. The point is, we did not get a MM hydra, but rather the beast of mythical lore as I read things. <em>That</em> hydra fit my story's metaphorical use depending on which version you chose. **/sidebar**</p><p></p><p>It was the venomous heads that inspired my version of the "poison clan" for this adventure. The <strong>frenzied, elven monk</strong> was perfect as the clan's (nearly) immortal leader and central figure, and finding a way to make him frenzied wouldn't be tough.</p><p></p><p>I wanted my clan to have insidiously worked their way into positions of control and power within the setting's city, and the idea that they might have begun smuggling sounded plausible and deviously fun. To create another layer of intrigue, I designed a noble Sheriff, basically above suspicion within Trumbull, who has stumbled onto this lucrative illicit venture. He becomes my primary vehicle for someone with a <strong>hidden agenda</strong>, although it would not be unreasonable to say that everything about the hydra clan's existence and motives were part of Lucien's hidden agenda.</p><p></p><p>I loved the idea that the Sheriff's ceremonial chain mail could provide an excellent clue for the party, while seemlessly incorporating the <strong>brass ring</strong> element. And once drawn into the mix, I thought it was pretty reasonable that my hydra clan monks would seek to deal with the snooping PC's in <strong>single combat</strong> by way of ambush and misdirection. Remember, they don't communicate frequently with one another, so a concerted attack wouldn't fit logically. Add to that, their various position's within Trumbull, and luring the party members into private meetings made the story appear dark and mysterious to my mind.</p><p></p><p>That left the <strong>cycle of life</strong> which leads me to another...</p><p></p><p>**sidebar** If we are to suffer the scrutiny of our estemeed Judge's (Nemmerle and Incognito), then they need to answer ours on occasion -- fair is fair <img src="https://cdn.jsdelivr.net/joypixels/assets/8.0/png/unicode/64/1f609.png" class="smilie smilie--emoji" loading="lazy" width="64" height="64" alt=";)" title="Wink ;)" data-smilie="2"data-shortname=";)" />. During this tournament I was left confused by the misuse of several phrases. The common sayings are <em>circle of life</em> and <em>viscious cycle</em>, not the other way around. Truth be told, in my Round 2 entry, I was sorely tempted to create a cursed bracelet as my <strong>viscious circle</strong> that animated once worn and would then attempt to bite clean through its wearer's limb <img src="https://cdn.jsdelivr.net/joypixels/assets/8.0/png/unicode/64/1f600.png" class="smilie smilie--emoji" loading="lazy" width="64" height="64" alt=":D" title="Big grin :D" data-smilie="8"data-shortname=":D" />!! **/sidebar**</p><p></p><p>Back to my expo, this ingredient stumped me for awhile, until I pulled a "Quickbeam" by going old school and digging up another bizarre monster of yesteryear, in the Berbalang. At the time, I thought this was a cool use of the ingredient because this beast actually has a unique life cycle. Furthermore, its attack on Cyrn Po's corpse would help the Sheriff cover his tracks and perhaps mislead the PC's for a short while -- both good things IMO. On reflection, though, I should have used this ingredient as a tie in to Lucien's recruitment of new clan members based on his human pupil's shorter cycles of life. This theme element was poorly used, and Incognito was totally justified in slamming me here.</p><p></p><p>In reviewing the Judge's remarks and criticisms at length, I want to respond directly to a few more.</p><p>> I disagree that Jasper and Brother Horace were unnecessary. Without an eyewitness, I would have been completely relying on the PC's investigative skills and luck to solve the mystery. Additionally, Nemmerle and Phoamslinger taught me a valuable lesson in other tournaments: You need several compelling Hooks when crafting an adventure. Otherwise, why would the party care to participate? In my scenario, if the PC's don't bite after the general alarm, Brother Horace approaches and appeals to their sense of justice. If that doesn't work, Lucien can seek to hire the PC's at a hefty price to allegedly protect his trade routes and business interests.</p><p>> I agree the entry was too long, but of late these tales have just gotten away from me. It's the fun of creating an interesting story, and I like details <img src="https://cdn.jsdelivr.net/joypixels/assets/8.0/png/unicode/64/1f642.png" class="smilie smilie--emoji" loading="lazy" width="64" height="64" alt=":)" title="Smile :)" data-smilie="1"data-shortname=":)" />!</p><p>>Finally, I'm not sure how much you counted the fact that I used a movie for base inspiration against me (if at all), but since you've never seen the film I hope it wasn't very much. I volunteered this info <em>because</em> of the problems in my opponent's Round 1 entry. Almost every story in every one of these contests draws on elements of books we've read; movies we've scene; or adventures we've played. That doesn't make them unoriginal IMO, and Nemmerle voices the same thoughts on more than one occasion in judging earlier tournaments.</p><p></p><p>Incognito: I think that I made several key mistakes in this Final Round, not the least of which was appealing to the preferences (or my perception thereof) of a different Judge. I also ignored your request to keep the story length down, and failed to inspire you like my opponent did, even though you liked the way I utilized several ingredients. My job is to win the heart and mind of the Judge, and it appears I came up just short this time out. Thanks for taking the time to review all of these entries.</p><p></p><p></p><p><u>Parting thoughts</u></p><p>1) As I stated yesterday, I thought I had a legit shot at winning back-to-back Iron DM's once the Final Round ingredients were posted. That's why I waited to alter my sig to include any reference to Iron DM competition.</p><p>2) Truth be told, though, I felt fortunate to be in the Finals this time around. My efforts in the Holiday tournament were more inspired...and succinct <img src="https://cdn.jsdelivr.net/joypixels/assets/8.0/png/unicode/64/1f609.png" class="smilie smilie--emoji" loading="lazy" width="64" height="64" alt=";)" title="Wink ;)" data-smilie="2"data-shortname=";)" />. If I'd been judging, Mythago and Nifft would have been in the Finals. I think they both presented more polished entries than either Seasong or I did.</p><p>3) Thanks to everyone who followed this tournament, and for all of the kind words posted in recent days. I love this place <img src="https://cdn.jsdelivr.net/joypixels/assets/8.0/png/unicode/64/1f600.png" class="smilie smilie--emoji" loading="lazy" width="64" height="64" alt=":D" title="Big grin :D" data-smilie="8"data-shortname=":D" />!!</p><p></p><p>Oh yeah, I almost forgot -- I'll be back!!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Quickbeam, post: 692232, member: 635"] Well, here it goes... One of my favorite Kung Fu movies of all time is [i]Five Deadly Venoms[/i] -- a cult classic that includes the phrase "poison clan rocks the world." How can you not like a movie with dialogue like that?!? Anyway, after seeing the list of ingredients, I really didn't want to create a story around the hydra as a monster...it just seemed too obvious and boring. So I went online and did a little reading about the [b]Lernaean Hydra[/b], and found a variety of stories connected to this mythical beast. **sidebar** FWIW, I need to take issue with some of the Judge's remarks here. Incognito says that hydrae are not poisonous and that the Lernaean version grew back TWO heads for every ONE that was severed. In many of the renditions of this tale, the hydra's heads were indeed venomous. Also, some versions had one head growing back, while others had two. The point is, we did not get a MM hydra, but rather the beast of mythical lore as I read things. [i]That[/i] hydra fit my story's metaphorical use depending on which version you chose. **/sidebar** It was the venomous heads that inspired my version of the "poison clan" for this adventure. The [b]frenzied, elven monk[/b] was perfect as the clan's (nearly) immortal leader and central figure, and finding a way to make him frenzied wouldn't be tough. I wanted my clan to have insidiously worked their way into positions of control and power within the setting's city, and the idea that they might have begun smuggling sounded plausible and deviously fun. To create another layer of intrigue, I designed a noble Sheriff, basically above suspicion within Trumbull, who has stumbled onto this lucrative illicit venture. He becomes my primary vehicle for someone with a [b]hidden agenda[/b], although it would not be unreasonable to say that everything about the hydra clan's existence and motives were part of Lucien's hidden agenda. I loved the idea that the Sheriff's ceremonial chain mail could provide an excellent clue for the party, while seemlessly incorporating the [b]brass ring[/b] element. And once drawn into the mix, I thought it was pretty reasonable that my hydra clan monks would seek to deal with the snooping PC's in [b]single combat[/b] by way of ambush and misdirection. Remember, they don't communicate frequently with one another, so a concerted attack wouldn't fit logically. Add to that, their various position's within Trumbull, and luring the party members into private meetings made the story appear dark and mysterious to my mind. That left the [b]cycle of life[/b] which leads me to another... **sidebar** If we are to suffer the scrutiny of our estemeed Judge's (Nemmerle and Incognito), then they need to answer ours on occasion -- fair is fair ;). During this tournament I was left confused by the misuse of several phrases. The common sayings are [i]circle of life[/i] and [i]viscious cycle[/i], not the other way around. Truth be told, in my Round 2 entry, I was sorely tempted to create a cursed bracelet as my [b]viscious circle[/b] that animated once worn and would then attempt to bite clean through its wearer's limb :D!! **/sidebar** Back to my expo, this ingredient stumped me for awhile, until I pulled a "Quickbeam" by going old school and digging up another bizarre monster of yesteryear, in the Berbalang. At the time, I thought this was a cool use of the ingredient because this beast actually has a unique life cycle. Furthermore, its attack on Cyrn Po's corpse would help the Sheriff cover his tracks and perhaps mislead the PC's for a short while -- both good things IMO. On reflection, though, I should have used this ingredient as a tie in to Lucien's recruitment of new clan members based on his human pupil's shorter cycles of life. This theme element was poorly used, and Incognito was totally justified in slamming me here. In reviewing the Judge's remarks and criticisms at length, I want to respond directly to a few more. > I disagree that Jasper and Brother Horace were unnecessary. Without an eyewitness, I would have been completely relying on the PC's investigative skills and luck to solve the mystery. Additionally, Nemmerle and Phoamslinger taught me a valuable lesson in other tournaments: You need several compelling Hooks when crafting an adventure. Otherwise, why would the party care to participate? In my scenario, if the PC's don't bite after the general alarm, Brother Horace approaches and appeals to their sense of justice. If that doesn't work, Lucien can seek to hire the PC's at a hefty price to allegedly protect his trade routes and business interests. > I agree the entry was too long, but of late these tales have just gotten away from me. It's the fun of creating an interesting story, and I like details :)! >Finally, I'm not sure how much you counted the fact that I used a movie for base inspiration against me (if at all), but since you've never seen the film I hope it wasn't very much. I volunteered this info [i]because[/i] of the problems in my opponent's Round 1 entry. Almost every story in every one of these contests draws on elements of books we've read; movies we've scene; or adventures we've played. That doesn't make them unoriginal IMO, and Nemmerle voices the same thoughts on more than one occasion in judging earlier tournaments. Incognito: I think that I made several key mistakes in this Final Round, not the least of which was appealing to the preferences (or my perception thereof) of a different Judge. I also ignored your request to keep the story length down, and failed to inspire you like my opponent did, even though you liked the way I utilized several ingredients. My job is to win the heart and mind of the Judge, and it appears I came up just short this time out. Thanks for taking the time to review all of these entries. [u]Parting thoughts[/u] 1) As I stated yesterday, I thought I had a legit shot at winning back-to-back Iron DM's once the Final Round ingredients were posted. That's why I waited to alter my sig to include any reference to Iron DM competition. 2) Truth be told, though, I felt fortunate to be in the Finals this time around. My efforts in the Holiday tournament were more inspired...and succinct ;). If I'd been judging, Mythago and Nifft would have been in the Finals. I think they both presented more polished entries than either Seasong or I did. 3) Thanks to everyone who followed this tournament, and for all of the kind words posted in recent days. I love this place :D!! Oh yeah, I almost forgot -- I'll be back!! [/QUOTE]
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