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Message: <blockquote data-quote="S'mon" data-source="post: 6773420" data-attributes="member: 463">>>1. You are invited to a party. Your host and some of his/her friends don't <fill in the blank (smoke, drink, eat gluten, listen to rap, whatever)> and request that people not bring such things to the party.Would you consider the that the host is being a jerk or out of line by not allowing certain things at his party?<<I'd think the gluten-free host was being a jerk to ban other people from bringing gluten-ous products. Just don't eat them. Alcohol ban is a bit iffy, I've been in parts of the US where it's taboo and I guess I'd accept the quaint local customs. It would seem really weird in England, not quite so much in Northern Ireland where I'm from. If the drinking culture is such that alcohol is likely to lead to people getting wasted & unpleasant, fair enough. Likewise Muslims who think pigs are descended from polymorphed Jews (so eating pork is like cannibalism), I'll not bring pork to their house. My brother in law had an orthodox Jewish girlfriend who brought her own food to my house, presumably to avoid spiritual contamination. Didn't bother me - likewise would not bother me a guest bringing their own food. Would bother me if a guest told me not to eat the food I liked, though - I'm not going to not serve pork just because I have Muslim or Jewish guests.Smoking & rap music have obvious direct impact on those around you and the host is certainly fine to ban them.>>2. You are invited to a themed-party (costume, birthday, Super Bowl, Star Trek, etc). The host asks you to bring your <fill in blank with appropriate implements of recreation>.If it were a Star Trek party on Super Bowl Sunday, would you ask people to turn off Star Trek so you could watch the Super Bowl? If it were a Super Bowl party, would you start DJing your "best of Star Trek" collection in the background? Would you feel the host was being a jerk if he asked you to stop?<<Host sets the rules here. Guest who breaks the rules is being a jerk.>>3. You and a bunch of friends meet up "to hang out and have some fun." One of you is driving. The driver insist on going where he wants to go, and tells anyone who doesn't want to do it that he'll drop them off at their home, but it's his car and he's driving it to where he want to go.Would you consider him to be being a jerk?<<This is too culturally alien to me to answer - my culture doesn't really do 'casual driving around'. I'd have to know what the cultural expectations were re 'hang out & have fun' in a car. I expect there's an expectation of discussion & mutual agreement.I think a lot of it is cultural expectations - typically one expects the host to set the rules, guests who seek to impose their own rules are rude, but a car trip is different from hosting at one's home.</blockquote>

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