Yeah, My Rejection letter is here

[RangerWickett]

And yep, here's my letter. Ah well.

 

[BiggusGeekus]

I got mine!

Dear Biggus Geekus,

You suck. Never send us anything ever again unless it's a story about really hot drow amazons or something.

Signed,

Your Betters

 

[MrFilthyIke]

Dear Biggus Geekus,

You suck. Never send us anything ever again unless it's a story about really hot drow amazons or something.

Signed,

Your Betters

I'd prefer a letter like that.

 

[Ankh-Morpork Guard]

I got mine!

They didn't even at least say you were sexy?! Wow, that's harsh...

 

[tarchon]

They didn't even at least say you were sexy?! Wow, that's harsh...

That can usually be inferred by whether or not they return the naked pictures of yourself that you include in the submission.

 

[Old Fezziwig]

That's why you didn't use second person; because you knew second place is the first loser.

Third place, though, appears to be the second winner.

This made my day. Thanks.

 

[John Morrow]

If you're complaining about this, you haven't had many rejections by major publishers. Which means you're either very inexperienced, very lucky, or very, very good.

I once worked at a major publisher and let's just say that most new authors probably don't want to know who could be reading a slush-pile submission. Heck, they let me read some slush-pile submissions to clear out a backlog once and I was a production assistant at the time (my job was helping to get the books printed -- I had nothing to do with editorial work). You also don't want to know how many pages those people often read before rejecting a story. Let's just say that you better grab their attention in the first page or two and, ideally, in the first paragraph.

 

[BiggusGeekus]

You also don't want to know how many pages those people often read before rejecting a story. Let's just say that you better grab their attention in the first page or two and, ideally, in the first paragraph.

That does it.

My next submission really is going to be about hot drow amazons. Maybe even in leather.

 

[Cthulhu's Librarian]

I once worked at a major publisher

John, where did you work? I used to work for HarperCollins, and my wife used to work for Tor.

 

[kenobi65]

That does it.

My next submission really is going to be about hot drow amazons. Maybe even in leather.

Just so long as you make sure you mention all that in the first paragraph, you're golden.