Game Derailment

[fba827]

I wish I had something nearly as amusing to add (any stories I have would take way too much typing to explain the context).

But, I had to still post to say everything on here is hysterical! Thanks for sharing!

 

[fuzzlewump]

We were inside of a vast temple trying to solve a puzzle that involved pressure switches that operated large stone doors that slid up to open and crashed down to close. Well, the DM would make the crashing noise himself every time we let off of a pressure switch, and when we described pressing in rapid succession the noise the DM was making became almost like a song. The whole group broke down into a harmony of door crashing in a style that rivaled the popular Nike basketball commercial that used the sound of screeching shoes and bouncing basketballs as impromptu music.

 

[Dannyalcatraz]

Yeah, it happens to everyone once in a while...but never to me!

1) We had a game session end when one guy scanned his character sheet and uttered "Hey, my character speaks Elvis!" (He had also, just 20 minutes previous to that mangled "Hornet Darts" into "Hanet Dorts.")

2) A similar double play ended a session when a player warped "Cannoness Yday" into "Canyoness Yday" and struggled with "water elemental." He kept saying "watermelon ental" instead.

3) My protestations above aside, I have participated in some play stoppages, though not due to MY malaprops- the culprit was my sharp tongue.

* A DM protested the way our low-level party utterly abused some harpies by using the Druid's entire complement of Entangle spells- this after it was pointed out that the party was rolling abysmally for attacks and damage. I asked him what he wanted the Druid to do, "...Purify Food and Drink them to death? They'll be 'Oh no, we're wet and well fed!' while we shoot at 'em..."

* The same DM (and same campaign) had our party encountering a tribe in the wilderness, and he was struggling with the Chief's welcoming speech, which had a part something like "We are a tribe of hunter-gatherers...well, more hunters than gatherers...um...well we gather a lot too..." And I lept in (mimicking his "Chief voice") with "Argh! "more hunters than gatherers?" Who wrote this speech? Bring me the royal speechwriter's head! This is CRAP!"

* We were playing RIFTS, and the player from #2 above had lost track of the fact that someone else had already found what the party was looking for and was bugging out. He burst into the camp's mess hall, all fierce, black and deadly in his captured SAMAS armor...only to encounter unarmed kitchen workers. They had no clue as to what he was looking for, despite his demands and threats, backed up with displays of physical violence (breaking tables, firing his weapon, etc.) FINALLY, someone in the group got his attention and told him we had accomplished the mission and he left.

We chose that moment to break to get drinks for the kitchen, and I started with: "Imagine these guys, 10 years from now...(w/Mexican accent- we're in Texas, after all) "Miguel, Lupe and I were just minding our business, when some madman burst into the mess hall firing his big gun and making threats. We had no idea what he wanted...I think he was high!" "Yeah...maybe he had the munchies something fierce...and he was all like "Where are the Oreo Cookies? C'mon M-F! WHERE ARE THE OREO COOKIES!"

At that point, everyone lapsed into similar accents and "role-played" aspects of his attack as a stoner in SAMAS with the munchies...with him supplying the appropriately altered dialog for his PC.

We laughed like it was a Cheech and Chong movie, and didn't game for the rest of the night.

 

[Dannyalcatraz]

FWIW, every last story in this thread has made me at least chuckle. Good stuff! Eventually, I'm going to be rewarding them all...

That DM I mentioned with the befuddled Chief? He routinely stops game night with stories of his job or RW love life (he's married)- he has almost a professional comedian's mastery of timing and storytelling, so its almost like a private comedy show.

 

[MrFilthyIke]

In an Eberron game, our party's Warforged Wizard created a legendary gag when he proclaimed he was casting "Scootching Ray!" instead of the far more situation appropriate Scorching Ray.

It still come up too this day, especially when wizardry is involved.

 

[El Mahdi]

As a DM, while reading some player text out loud, I once pronounced brasier (brā’ zher) as brassiere (brä zēr’). Pretty much stopped the game for the next 30 minutes.

edit: looks like Eccles encountered a DM with the same problem.

 

[Dannyalcatraz]

C'mon- its a given that THAT mispronunciation happens at least once per campaign with new gamers. It may not have been you, but SOMEBODY will goof that one.

The question is...what happens afterwards?

I mean, is the mis-speaker the only one who makes the error, which is then quickly corrected (with humor), or are you the only one who realizes the mistake?

In the latter case, your guffaws could seem quite awkward...

 

[weem]

@Danny

* The same DM (and same campaign) had our party encountering a tribe in the wilderness, and he was struggling with the Chief's welcoming speech, which had a part something like "We are a tribe of hunter-gatherers...well, more hunters than gatherers...um...well we gather a lot too..." And I lept in (mimicking his "Chief voice") with "Argh! "more hunters than gatherers?" Who wrote this speech? Bring me the royal speechwriter's head! This is CRAP!"

* We were playing RIFTS, and the player from #2 above had lost track of the fact that someone else had already found what the party was looking for and was bugging out. He burst into the camp's mess hall, all fierce, black and deadly in his captured SAMAS armor...only to encounter unarmed kitchen workers. They had no clue as to what he was looking for, despite his demands and threats, backed up with displays of physical violence (breaking tables, firing his weapon, etc.) FINALLY, someone in the group got his attention and told him we had accomplished the mission and he left.

We chose that moment to break to get drinks for the kitchen, and I started with: "Imagine these guys, 10 years from now...(w/Mexican accent- we're in Texas, after all) "Miguel, Lupe and I were just minding our business, when some madman burst into the mess hall firing his big gun and making threats. We had no idea what he wanted...I think he was high!" "Yeah...maybe he had the munchies something fierce...and he was all like "Where are the Oreo Cookies? C'mon M-F! WHERE ARE THE OREO COOKIES!"

Laughed so hard at these - too funny - I'm wiping the tears away, haha

 

[Dannyalcatraz]

Glad I could make you laugh!

We actually had people on the floor with those...

 

[weem]

Glad I could make you laugh!

We actually had people on the floor with those...

I'm telling you, I almost was - I was crying laughing - I have a headache now, haha.

I don't have any good ones myself (that I can remember). I'll have to think about that - maybe keep track of them more often.