Game Derailment

[MichaelSomething]

"Hi guys! Sorry I was late to the session! Work took longer then I thought. To make up for it, I brought you guys a peanut butter cup, 5 mini brownies, and a Ritz cracker!"

That made my group laugh.

 

[Imperialus]

I once had a group of Hobgoblins who were equipped with tower shields that I described as being similar to Roman Scrotum's

Not a Freudian slip but the DM for our burning wheel campaign recently launched into a five minute description of a "massive tower, with two circular domes at the bottom"...

 

[Dannyalcatraz]

Roman Scrotums?

Greatness!

And your description of the tower? We just had one of those incidents as well.

We were going through RttToEE, and we came upon this section of the dungeon dominated by a towering column of black basalt that had an incredibly phallic description according to the boxed text. (When I can find my copy of the module, I may post the quote.)

Giggles started quickly, but soon turned to laughter when someone started out humming the theme to Shaft, which I then interrupted by suggesting it was more reminiscent of Mandingo.

THAT stopped the evening for a good 10 minutes, and jokes continued for another 30 after that.

One simply must wonder what is going through the minds of the people writing the boxed text for modules.

 

[Ariosto]

"My nads" is actually pretty appropriate.

 

[Orryn Emrys]

I was running Scourge of the Slave Lords back during the days of yore. Given, I'd only been DMing for a dozen or so years at the time, so I was clearly a novice prepared to make a novice mistake... *grins*

There was a segment at the slavers' mountain stockade when the party proceeded into the upper story of the "curtain wall" structure and encountered a hobgoblin guard contingent with their chief, who was calmly feeding cheese to his crow... which I somehow read as "cow" in the description. And once I'd said it, despite how ridiculous it sounded, I stubbornly stuck with... particularly after scanning the paragraph several times and repeatedly coming up with the word "cow".

After the session, which frankly became somewhat ludicrous in the wake of my little faux pas, since the players just couldn't get over the cow, I finally discovered my error when the magical "r" appeared in the creature's description.

I became a tad bit more discriminating after that regarding my perspective on and presentation of boxed text... not to mention my preparation techniques.

 

[Mallus]

This happened over the weekend while playing out an encounter over our campaign's message board... we were trading threats during a climatic fight w/our chief rival.

What I meant to type was "I'm going to blow up your corpse on stage during the finale of my next play!" (which made perfect sense in context).

I neglected to include the word 'up'.

The party mage replied IC with a droll "Oh my".

Instead of correcting himself, my PC (a rather monstrous Dragonborn paladin) decided to go with it and added "Then I'm going to poop out your eyes" -- note: I used a harsher synonym for 'poop'.

I guess it didn't bring play to a halt, seeing as we were playing-by-post, but it would have in person!

 

[ExploderWizard]

We have had a few fun ones over the years. Our group is so silly it doesn't take much to end a play session due to laughter. A few of my faves:

1) A GURPS fantasy game. We were all playing law enforcement types that followed one PC. This player's character was The Defender ( a semi-noble travelling judge/jury kind of fellow) The Defender carried the weapon of his office-a magical sword known as The Valor. This was the first session of the campaign and all of our characters were joining up and pledging our service to the Defender. We roleplayed out the scene where we all introduced ourselves, pledged our service,ect. One player introduced himself, and in a very serious tone of voice said: " Your sword is mine." We were in tears for a good half hour or more. It was so memorable that its become his uername now.

2) A friend was DMing a D&D dungeon adventure. We had discovered the entrance to an underground tomb and proceeded down the stairs. The DM read us the description of the room which contained four large statues. What he actually said was: " You see four traps, would you like to check for statues."

3) I was running a C&C adventure a while back and the PC's had travelled to a village to aid the locals. Several villagers had gone missing recently and the town marshall was explaining the situation to the PC's in an attempt to receive aid. Befuddled by a lack of sleep, what I said was: " The villagers have been missing for quite some time and there has been no demand for thier return".

 

[ArghMark]

Call of Cthulhu.


First ten minutes of the game. I slip out with
'The head cultist behind the counter says..'

With eight years of gaming, there's been so much laughing I honestly can't remember which is best.

We were playing a BESM20 pickup game at one point, and one of the players chose to be Ken from street fighter; the bad guy of the game suddenly became M.Bison.

Cue M.Bison, dramatically unwrapping his cloak at the end of the wackiest session I've ever played, wearing a japanese schoolgirl outfit and carrying a moon star wand. He began his transformation sequence and Ken hadokened him off the wall he was standing on.

 

[Tinker Gnome]

I can not draw a circular(Or even worse a semicircular) room at the end of a hallway without giggles.

Same goes for two circular rooms next to each other.

 

[ExploderWizard]

I can not draw a circular(Or even worse a semicircular) room at the end of a hallway without giggles.

Same goes for two circular rooms next to each other.

It sounds like you have the perfect maturity level to fit in with our group.