Gaming and Your Significant Other

[Enforcer]

My wife isn't a gamer, though she has given it a try for me on a couple occasions. I have two married couples who play in my game, however.

 

[mach1.9pants]

My wife points me to the scene in Worcestershire school from Shrek 3.....

"heh heh" **snort** **nose bleed**

 

[Jan van Leyden]

How involved is your sig-o with your gaming lifestyle?

I met my wife at a weekly board game event. She was among the few of that group who went over to the pub when our gaming location closed for the night. In the wee hours after midnight we came to talk about this curious roleplaying game.

She expressed some interest and I invited her for the CoC campaign I was running at the time. She actually did come and was hooked. Three months later we fell in love, were betrothed two months after that and married in the following year.

Since then we maintain our weekly boardgame night, two to three RPG campaigns and far too few weekends for long games like Civi, 18XX, or Britannia.

When our daughter was born nine and a half years ago we had to drop the gaming weekends we organized twice a year at some holiday resort.

Can I imagine a life without gaming? No!

Can I imagine a life without my wife? No!!!

Can I imagine a life gaming without my wife? No!!!

 

[Chaldfont]

My wife's not a gamer. I always joke that she's a closet gamer, since she loves Lord of the Rings, Conan movies and Harry Potter.

She'll play Magic the Gathering, Puerto Rico and Carcassonne, though. She kicks my ass at Carcassonne.

 

[Iron Sky]

Our group seems particularly unlucky when it comes to GFs and gaming.

For me, my ex-GF gamed with us when we went out for the first time in High School and it worked out. When we got back together after college (long story there in itself) she gamed with us for a while in my 2nd Edition Exalted game. I explained the rules poorly too her when I was explaining the character I made for her - mostly because I didn't have a firm grip on the whole thing - and each time afterwards, we'd end up fighting any time I'd try to explain the rules.

Then she'd play and get upset with me while we were playing because she didn't understand how they worked... Yeah. So, after that we kind-of mutually decided that she wouldn't game with us. So instead, she'd just sit in the room while we played and make snarky comments. So we stopped playing at my house. Then she'd call me two or three times during the game trying to get me to come home or, when I started turning off my phone, just lay a massive guilt trip before I left...

So, yeah, that relationship is over (not because of gaming, but the gaming brought some of the issues out that ended it).

One of my friends quit gaming, I think anyway, in part so he wouldn't have to tell women that he played as he went out wife-hunting.

One of my other friends didn't tell women that he played for a long time, then when he finally met one that found out and wanted to play, he wouldn't let her. I think now he's being a bit more open about it, but not sure since he doens't play with us anymore (due to 4e).

One of my friends has a wife that he WoWs with and who tried gaming with us for a bit, but she was a bit too litterally minded and got bored when we weren't rolling dice and killing things.

One of my friends who moved to California WoWs with his wife too, but she's never expressed interest in roleplaying.

My friend in the Navy probably told his fiancee about his gaming, but she doesn't strike me as the gamer sort.

So, group total:

2 single guys(me included as of January 1st).
1 married guy with wife who tried it, but wasn't interested.
1 married guy who games, but wife isn't interested.
1 soon-to-be married guy who games, but fiancee probably isn't interested.
1 dating guy who games, no idea if his current GF games.
1 married guy who quit gaming.

 

[Frost]

My wife dabbled with it a bit when we were dating, but decided it really wasn't for her. She has no problem with me playing though. She wasn't raised in the US, so she never had the "it's for nerds" hang ups. She figures it's better than me blowing cash at the bar or something. I play twice a month and I think that is a good amount for both of us. I couldn't imagine leaving her bored on EVERY Friday night. Ha. Actually, one of my player's brings his "D&D Widow" to our game session, so the two them have fun watching chick flicks and such while we boys sit in the basement guzzling beer, rolling dice, and slaying monsters.

We have two kids too, so that factors into the amount of time I can devote.

It's funny how almost everyone here (myself included) talks about his/her SO "allowing" them to play.

 

[mhacdebhandia]

It's funny how almost everyone here (myself included) talks about his/her SO "allowing" them to play.

Well, those of you who don't game with your partner, anyway.

Unlike some people I don't think it's necessarily a danger sign if your partner wants you to cut back on your gaming or whatever, because relationships involve compromise. If your partner really hates that you game, though, or expresses a passive-aggressive resentment towards the time you devote to the hobby however little, I'd have to wonder why the hell you'd be with them in the first place.

 

[Graybeard]

My wife does not game but is interested in the story. She will ask me what happened after each session.

I did play with a group where the DMs wife was a player. Sometimes it worked well and other times it didn't. When it didn't, it was uncomfortable for the rest of the players.

 

[Frost]

If your partner really hates that you game, though, or expresses a passive-aggressive resentment towards the time you devote to the hobby however little, I'd have to wonder why the hell you'd be with them in the first place.

Right, I agree completely. It's one thing if they aren't interested in it, it's another thing if it bothers them.

I also can't imagine hiding it from someone I was with. I'm not saying I'd bring it up on the first date, but I can't imagine being in a relationship and having to hide it.

 

[Rel]

My wife does not game but is interested in the story. She will ask me what happened after each session.

My wife is similar (except she does enjoy occasional gaming). She always likes to keep up on what's going on in the games I play. And she is an invaluable sounding board and co-conspirator when I run games. She's come up with some of the more evil plots that I've ever inflicted on my players.

Sometimes she scares me a little.

It's HAWT!