Turnabout Is Fair Play - Female Gamers

[theredrobedwizard]

Playing with women is trouble. They don't care about roleplaying, just like to hack and slash, swear too much at the table (which tends to embarrass male players and make it difficult to add new ones to the group), and tend to always have sex on their minds and manage to find really crude innuendos in everything.

Trouble, I tell you.

QFMFT. Once you've met my girlfriend, that stereotype of the "only into the social interactions, not the powergaming and combat aspects of the game" girl gamer is shattered.

I wish I could find more female players, though. They generally tend to be way more open to bizarre plots that make no sense to the sane; as well as looking much better in a chainmail bikini at GenCon.

Just my 11500gp, though.

-TRRW

 

[Merkuri]

I wonder if one of the reasons more women aren't in gaming is that it's scary for a woman to go over a stranger's house that you know will be full of strange men. Most groups are harmless, but the sad truth is that the chance of women being accosted when meeting strangers is much higher than men in the same situation.

Personally, I'm in a situation where I don't know too many people in the area, and even back in my home town none of my friends were into roleplaying games, so if I wanted to join a live group I'd need to go out on a limb and meet with strangers. Honestly, that's scary for me. I'd definitely have to bring my boyfriend along were I to go over a stranger's house for a D&D game, but most women in my situation probably don't already have a gamer boyfriend who'd be willing to go with them.

Of course, the stereotype of geeky, pimply, male teens sitting in a dark basement playing D&D probably does not help get females interested in the game. :\

 

[theredrobedwizard]

There are gamer girls who date non-gamer guys? This phenomenon is alien to me, please explain further.

No, seriously. I've *never* seen it happen. Well, maybe they were non-gamers at first, but only for like 3 weeks.

-TRRW

 

[Goldmoon]

My last boyfriend had and wanted nothing to do with gaming. I prefer it that way as it will only lead to trouble when I DM a game in which he is a player.

 

[Thornir Alekeg]

I know you meant this in jest, but of the 5 women that I have gamed with for any length of time, 4 seemed irrationally bloodthirsty.

My wife, when she first started playing did not want to kill things, so she created a Magic User with specialization in Enchantment spells - she would charm the bad guys rather than kill them.

First session, the entire party has been knocked unconscious in a fight. She has no spells left and a wererat is coming after her. She pulls out the magic dagger she has and stabs it - Natural 20! The DM describes the strike and its effect in gruesome detail. My wife responds with "Cool!" and immediately dropped the pacifist thing.

 

[Oryan77]

I'm one of those "keep my gaming on the down-low" gamers. I never wanted to scare a girl away by telling her I pretend to be strange characters in an imaginary world. After dating my fiance for about 2 years and not having a D&D group for several years due to moving across the country, I started getting a few 3.0 books to see what the D20 rules were about.

For some strange reason, she was interested in this D&D stuff and asked me about it. Then she wanted me to solo her in a game. I felt really weird because I thought she'd find it really weird. Boy was I wrong. She loves the roleplaying aspect of D&D. Five years later and we have a solid group of people that we became friends with.

I never thought a really hot girl that was class president both in high school & community college and is now working full time at a law firm and about to go to law school would be interested in pretending to be a Half-Elf Sorceress on the weekends. She probably wouldn't keep playing if I wasn't playing, but she looks forward to each session.

 

[Yami no Hon]

I'm a girl gamer. It started like this: my brother saw this computer game called Baulder's Gate at afriends house, and bought the game. We both liked the game, so when he was at the bookstore and saw the nice shiny new 3.0 PHB, he bought it.

We looked through the book, familiarized outselfs with the rules... and did nothing for a couple of years. Then, in high school, a couple of my friends from NJROTC had the books with them, and were discussing a game. I sort of invited myself to the converstation, and eventually became the group's first female player. No I never dated any of them. Yes, we were unstopable combat monsters. Even my bard.

I got to college, joined the gaming club, and have been rolling ever since. The majority of the school's population is female, so most of the groups I've been a part of have been female-dominated. For us, a campaign lasts one semester, or at the most one full academic year. Then we break for the summer and reform as an entirly different campaign.

My experince: girls can be just as crude and stab-happy as the guys. Sometimes even more so, sometimes less.

 

[gm4hire]

I wonder if one of the reasons more women aren't in gaming is that it's scary for a woman to go over a stranger's house that you know will be full of strange men. Most groups are harmless, but the sad truth is that the chance of women being accosted when meeting strangers is much higher than men in the same situation.

This is exactly why we meet all potential players in a public neutral place before we invite them to a game.

Personally I don't want some strange person I've never met before to know where I live if I think they're creepy and if I were going to join a group that wouldn't meet me somewhere else first I wouldn't feel comfortable going blind to one of their homes.

That said I've done it before when I was younger and stupid. But I made sure several people knew where I was going beforehand and when I'd be back. Nothing bad ever happened thankfully. Actually I met my husband in one of those groups.

I've said this before on other boards when this comes up. Female gamers are just like male gamers. They come in all types and there are a lot of them out there.

 

[Thomas Percy]

It depends of person.
Some my she-players are looking for husband, some for fun (in the game terms).

 

[Winterthorn]

Lovely thread to read!

I DM an all-male group of 4 grognards - old friends but kinda predictable and stale in their gaming style; and I just play in another group of 6 - one of the 2 women is the wife of the DM, and one of the male player's is a Catholic Priest with an excellent sense of humour (which I think is kinda neat ), and I am the gaymer who is single and not "out" in either group.

I like having women present at the gaming table, regardless of my "leanings", and I feel strongly that mixed company makes a better game - conditional upon generally respectable attitude and behaviour. I'm not a father, doesn't look it like it'll happen for me, and I admit to feeling a little envious of groups where gamer's can include SO's and their kids. But I am very encouraged to see that happening too.

Getting back to the OP: it's funny how facts defy the fictions of stereotypes!