What if real life was like D&D?

[WarlockLord]

Musicians can not only talk their way out of a fight, but convince career mass-murderers to buy them drinks.

QUOTE]

I play the violin in real life.

 

[jeffh]

People with house-cats would obey their every whim in fear of mortal peril.

How is this different from real life?

 

[cattoy]

the crazy cat lady would be more feared than the local drug lord.

 

[Hypersmurf]

You can't coup de grace yourself? Hmm.

You can only CdG a helpless target, and if you're helpless, you won't be taking any full round actions...

-Hyp.

 

[(Psi)SeveredHead]

No they couldn't, their Fort Save would be so high that anything but a 1 would save them.

"I'll just insert the barrel into my ear and... *bang bang bang* Oh god oh god... that really hurt!..." [insert Family Guy clip of Peter shoting himself for the news camera]

You can choose to fail saves.

the crazy cat lady would be more feared than the local drug lord.

It depends on whether the cats listen to her.

 

[Fishbone]

No, trained riding dogs would be used to control the cat menace.
Riding dogs are scary to 1st level characters.

 

[Knight Otu]

You can choose to fail saves.

And of course a high-level character wouldn't use a run-of-the-mill 2d6 damage pistol - he'd use his trusty +1 flaming frost shock corrosive thundering pistol.

 

[Rabelais]

An experienced soldier only needs a night in a comfy bed to heal the wounds from several stab wounds.

 

[(Psi)SeveredHead]

No one would ever die of physical trauma on a hospital bed. Every doctor would be a 2nd-level expert (or more) with a Heal +10 score and nurses to use aid another. You couldn't bleed to death on the bed; the DC to fix that is always 15. In fact, you probably wouldn't need a doctor to fix the bleeding; the ambulance attendant can easily do that.

Having said that, ambulances would need to be fast. A two minute response time is still twice the time it could take for a regular human being to bleed to death. A mortal would is always caused by severing an artery, never a vein... but arteries heal really fast under the care of a medic.

 

[Whizbang Dustyboots]

And of course a high-level character wouldn't use a run-of-the-mill 2d6 damage pistol - he'd use his trusty +1 flaming frost shock corrosive thundering pistol.

I'd prefer my trusty +1 distance seeking pistol of speed, myself.