A DM who only awards XP for killing monsters is not a good DM, period.
DMing like that encourages murderhobo behaviour.
Let's be clear here: I have no criticism of your criticism that the particular game you were playing did not give XP for "seeking alliance and attempting to find out more about what was going on to try to minimize casualties of innocent people." Maybe it should have. But it didn't, apparently.
My criticism of your statement is that you see a lack of reward as a penalty when you presumably knew what you needed to do to get the reward. That's a weak argument worth abandoning in my view.
IMHO, lack of reward is a penalty. There is a tradition (right or wrong, not universally) in D&D of rewarding only violent solutions to problems. That's why I prefer ignoring XP and advancing based on story and overall achievements.
It has nothing to do with my not accepting responsibility, not wanting my PC to face risks or any of the other BS. I simply think my PC should be rewarded for doing what they would do, even if sometimes being a hero means not killing everything that moves.
Yeah, that's fine. As I've said several times now, I think it's fair that you would like the game to reward you for non-violent approaches to problems and to choose to do that in your own games. I do that in my own game, depending on what I'm going for. But that's not the game you were playing, right? In my opinion, if your goal was to gain a level, then the smart play was to do the things that allow you to level. Not doing those things and then complaining about being penalized is, to me, pretty weak provided you were aware of what you needed to do.
Maybe instead of going to work tomorrow and being rewarded for doing so with a paycheck, I will sit home, get no paycheck, then loudly proclaim that I've been penalized.
We're just talking past each other. I knew what I needed to do to get XP. My point is that I don't like the default assumption that you only get XP for killing.
I don't blame my DM, he was just following the rules.
We're just talking past each other. I knew what I needed to do to get XP. My point is that I don't like the default assumption that you only get XP for killing.
I don't blame my DM, he was just following the rules.
We're coming at it from several different angles, but I think it's safe to say that most DMs here would agree that awarding XP just for killing enemies - and only for killing enemies - would not be our chosen way to run a campaign.