The Wizard class has a lot of problems
Tell me the fundamental difference between a staff wizard and a wand wizard. Yeah, almost nothing. No bonus feats, no powers tied into them, no class changing functionality.
IME it's the magic powers that you can get on different implements that make them feel completely different. And sure, a "wand wizard" can use a staff, but likely their best implement is a wand. Wands give access to new powers without even needing to multiclass. Staves tend to make your AoE spells more powerful. Orbs mostly seem to be about inflicting nasty status ailments. They feel a lot more different from each other than, say, the kinds of enhancements you can get on a hammer vs a sword.
I don't think spellbooks are that hard to figure out and there have already been official FAQ answers on some of your questions, so you should check that out.
Also, Blinding Barrage and Sleep are just very different powers, I don't think it's easy to compare them. Close blast 3 is rather different from Area burst 2 in 20. Unconscious is a much, MUCH nastier status to inflict than blinded, so it's reasonable that it happens less often. But personally I think that while Sleep is great if you build an Orbizard around it, the spell is otherwise a bit average and only situationally useful if you don't, especially at low levels. A level 1 non-orb wizard will probably get a lot more mileage out of Flaming Sphere.