the reason discussions between fans/players become so heated about edition changes is not due to quibbles about rules; rather they are tied to issues regarding creative control, the means of production over a shared narrative, and how sense is made in both the game and real worlds.
I know it is very fashionable on the internet to fight the battle of "who can care less," to argue that everything basically boils down to personal ego and guys who take things too seriously, to characterize any discussion as heated "wars," to condescend, and act above it all...
...but I think yer onto something.
Discussions about the changes editions bring (whether or not you want to use the term "Edition Wars," with its negative connotations, to describe all of these, or just the subset of them that become overly passionate) are, I'd agree, about what it means to make the game
your own.
It's not a problem unique to D&D, but I think in D&D it is especially distinct, because the game encourages you, from the get-go, to make the game your own. The DM and the players all come up with their own world, characters, and adventures, and this fosters a powerful sense of ownership over the game. You don't just see the rule as a rule, you are invested in the rule, it becomes a cornerstone of your world, or your characters, a cause of a lot of the fun you've had in adventures.
And then someone comes down "from on high" and tells you that the rule, and hundreds of other rules, were no good, were wrong, were in need of revision.
And it becomes very easy to get defensive about it, for a lot of players. For them, this isn't The D&D Game, this is
my personal D&D game, that people who don't know me, who don't know my table, are suddenly telling me, is not good enough to continue to support.
It feels like outside interference of the worst sort.
For me personally, the only thing really at stake in any edition discussion is the principles behind certain rule choices, and how they reflect the game that I personally want to play. For instance, I am a fan of the earlier editions' choice to have the dungeon be the basic challenge in play, and I am not so much a fan of the recent editions' choice to have the encounter be the basic challenge in play. I like to get at the actual cause and effect of certain rules choices, to see what they were meant to achieve, what they do achieve, and which ones I would like to use in my own games.
Edition discussions, especially heated ones, reflect much more than the personality defects of those who participate in them. I think that dismissing the "edition wars" as the work of trolls and fanboys is disingenuous.
It's a little like telling a little girl who is upset over her dead puppy that the only reason she's upset is because she cares too much about some dumb animal.
There's something different going on there.