My Critical Fumbles Deck is POWERFUL!

[fireinthedust]

My Critical Fumbles Deck is so powerful I tore the box when I opened it the first time!

The Deck itself reeks of natural 1s, dipped by its odious makers in liquid failure by only the most butteriest of fingers, then left to dry on the wrong side of the bed while its masters posted its picture on Failblog.

 

[Heathen72]

That's nothing! My old critical fumbles deck* was made from the patches of skin torn from the stubbed toes of a thousand failed skateboarders. Any skin ripped cleanly off was discarded. Only where some feeble attempt at first aid ended in a white, soap like patch of clammy flesh being held to the tip of the toe (by a grotty band-aid and some string like sliver of skin) were the remains kept.

These remains were then ground into a paste called iSnack 2.0 that even people who like vegemite hated, and spread across pieces of toast. These pieces of toast were then dropped from waist height onto a kitchen floor. Only those which fell with the paste side down were kept.

To turn the pieces of toast into cards, they were placed in the bag of a young mountaineer golfer (see below). The already somewhat flattened toast was then removed from the bag and hidden in Oprah Winfrey's couch, ready for the episode where Tom Cruise Jumped the Couch, flattening them further and making them finally ready for delivery.

[ame]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kR8scQ7888I[/ame]




*I lost it

 

[Dungeoneer]

Speaking of decks... anyone have any ideas on how to (cheaply) make your own custom deck of cards? Doesn't have to be fancy, I'm just looking for something a little more advanced than handwritten 5x7" notecards.

 

[I'm A Banana]

A critical fumble deck?

Um...I have never smelled a Natural 1, how does it reek?

 

[jonesy]

Speaking of decks... anyone have any ideas on how to (cheaply) make your own custom deck of cards? Doesn't have to be fancy, I'm just looking for something a little more advanced than handwritten 5x7" notecards.

They sell laminators pretty cheap these days (29 dollars):
[ame=http://www.amazon.com/Scotch-TL901-Thermal-Laminator-Roller/dp/B0010JEJPC/ref=sr_1_1?s=office-products&ie=UTF8&qid=1297952838&sr=1-1]Amazon.com: Scotch TL901 Thermal Laminator 2 Roller System: Office Products[/ame]

Print the cards on light cardboard (making sure it'll go with the laminator), then laminate. Of course, if you don't have a printer and would only use them for making the cards that might still be a bit pricy.

 

[Umbran]

Um...I have never smelled a Natural 1, how does it reek?

The only way to smell them is to fumble so bad that not only does the character have problems, but the die winds up the player's nose.

 

[Random Axe]

Speaking of decks... anyone have any ideas on how to (cheaply) make your own custom deck of cards? Doesn't have to be fancy, I'm just looking for something a little more advanced than handwritten 5x7" notecards.

You can make your own fancier deck on godeckyourself.com

 

[El Mahdi]

A critical fumble deck?

Um...I have never smelled a Natural 1, how does it reek?

It's a combination of elderberries and bad cheese...