Lanefan
Victoria Rules
In 1e the Cleric is not far behind the Fighter in terms of what it can do in melee...anything goes for armour and shield, the only real limitation is allowable weapons. I'm playing a Cleric in a 1e-ish game right now in fact; he recently came by some useful items to help with the damage-dealing so his tactics have changed a bit, but before that his main focus was to get in there and keep some opponents glued up trying to hit him (he has close to the best AC in the party) until the damage dealers could relieve him, and if he managed to give out any real damage in the process so much the better. Worked great! (and turned out oddly similar to the way Defenders are in theory supposed to work in 4e) Party is 8th-10th level, if it matters.By and large in most editions? Yeah, you're pretty weak in melee. 1st/2nd you got one attack with a crummy THACO for d8 damage. It was unlikely you had a damage bonus (a mighty +1 at 16 str).
He rarely if ever worries about healing anyone until the fighting is over.
It's possible Clerics are worse at fighting in 2e than in 1e, I wouldn't know.
As for refusing to use a resource, to me that comes down to the individual character. One would think a Paladin, being in theory a Goodly sort, *would* normally use his healing on other party members without issue. But a Cleric who maybe isn't so Goodly can pick and choose, using his healing resources when - and on whom - it suits him. Also, if there's any significant previous history (for good or bad) between the healer and the healee that might also play into it regardless of alignment: "You're hurt, but this time you'll live; and let the pain be a reminder to you to pay your own gambling debts next time we're in town."
Lanefan