Is the DM the most important person at the table

[doctorbadwolf]

Thing is, the DM has gobs more material* to haul around than do any of the players; making it far easier to just run at the DM's place - which also makes the DM the host.

* - board, minis, props and supplies, game notes past and present, rulebooks, character sheets**, dice, etc.
** - standing rule here is that character sheets stay with the DM between sessions.

If I'm DMing a full session "on the road" the stuff I have to take with me nearly fills the trunk of my car...except the board, which doesn't fit and has to go in the back seat.
Actually it does, in that if he* decides he doesn't want you there you're stuck looking for a place to play.

* - or someone else living there who's not involved in the game, which IME is more common.

yeah, you and I have very different games and friend groups.

 

[hawkeyefan]

I do.

As a player I can focus on my own character and on whatever's going on around it, and otherwise switch my brain off - particularly if I'm playing a dumb Fighter and-or when my PC isn't involved in the action of the moment.

But as DM I have to always be aware of what the party - and each PC - is doing, of what the game world is doing around them, of where the PCs are on the map, and of the personalities and reactions of any NPCs they meet. I also have to know the mechanics of whatever foes they're fighting and play those foes as best I can.

Add to this I also have to take notes on proceedings (my memory's not that good!), while at the same time trying to "read the room" and assess how the players are responding to whatever's going on. And sometimes be a referee.

In short, I need to be "on" a much higher percentage of the time when DMing than I do when playing.

Further, while a player can largely ignore the game between sessions if s/he wants, the same isn't usually true of a DM. Sure there's some who can wing everything on the fly, much like a rapper who makes up the words as he goes along, but those are a rare breed: most DMs, like most rappers, have to prep what they're doing at least to some extent.

This presumes having players who are willing to take on these sort of tasks. Not all are.

To me most of this sounds like choices that people are making that make things harder.

A DM chooses to keep copious notes. Players choose to turn their brains off when playing. Or choose to not pitch in to help the game.

These are exactly the kinds of things that I’m talking about that can be changed and make the game easier for the DM.

I guess I should give a bit of context to my remarks above: I'm used to systems where a lot of rules and mechanics are not player-facing, which - both as player and DM - is how I like it.

DMing would, of course, be somewhat easier if running a system where a greater proportion of the mechanics are player-side; by the same token, playing in such a system would likely be a bit harder.

What mechanics are not player facing that you’re worried about sharing? Initiative? Something else?

 

[Lanefan]

To me most of this sounds like choices that people are making that make things harder.

A DM chooses to keep copious notes.

My notes are anything but copious, but I find keeping even the bare-bones ones I do throws me off all the other stuff.

Players choose to turn their brains off when playing. Or choose to not pitch in to help the game.

Which is their right. As long as someone's doing the mapping and someone's doing the party-side treasury, we're good.

What mechanics are not player facing that you’re worried about sharing? Initiative? Something else?

We use a simplified initiative system, players and DM alike.

Saving throw charts (for characters and items), to-hit matrix (in 3e, BAB), fumble and wild magic tables, xp calculation, properties of unidentified magic items, and a whole bunch of other less-common things are strictly DM-facing in our games. Players roll and add their bonuses, DM worries about the rest.

As a player in 3e, where BAB and some saves are shifted to player-side, I found them annoying.

 

[hawkeyefan]

My notes are anything but copious, but I find keeping even the bare-bones ones I do throws me off all the other stuff.

Which is their right. As long as someone's doing the mapping and someone's doing the party-side treasury, we're good.

We use a simplified initiative system, players and DM alike.

Saving throw charts (for characters and items), to-hit matrix (in 3e, BAB), fumble and wild magic tables, xp calculation, properties of unidentified magic items, and a whole bunch of other less-common things are strictly DM-facing in our games. Players roll and add their bonuses, DM worries about the rest.

As a player in 3e, where BAB and some saves are shifted to player-side, I found them annoying.

Okay, that’s a lot of cognitive load that could be shared that you’re choosing to take on. Which is fine, if that’s your preference, but it’s a choice that you’re making.

Even if those things were the default expectation of a DM these days, I’d still tell a DM who was learning to share that load.

Perhaps a player not knowing their saving throws or chance to hit has some benefit to play that you enjoy, but that’s not how most editions work.

I take more notes as a player than as a DM, and I ask my players to do the same. So this way I don’t have to worry about that. Same with initiative and other similar things.

Honestly, it may be their prerogative to not have to do any of that, and to not pay attention unless it’s their turn, but that sounds like poor play, to me.

Maybe I’m missing something....easy to imagine since I’m not actually at your games....but it sounds to me like your game demands a lot more of the DM and less of the players than what I’d expect would be typical.

 

[Fanaelialae]

Okay, that’s a lot of cognitive load that could be shared that you’re choosing to take on. Which is fine, if that’s your preference, but it’s a choice that you’re making.

Even if those things were the default expectation of a DM these days, I’d still tell a DM who was learning to share that load.

Perhaps a player not knowing their saving throws or chance to hit has some benefit to play that you enjoy, but that’s not how most editions work.

I take more notes as a player than as a DM, and I ask my players to do the same. So this way I don’t have to worry about that. Same with initiative and other similar things.

Honestly, it may be their prerogative to not have to do any of that, and to not pay attention unless it’s their turn, but that sounds like poor play, to me.

Maybe I’m missing something....easy to imagine since I’m not actually at your games....but it sounds to me like your game demands a lot more of the DM and less of the players than what I’d expect would be typical.

While those are all good things to do if you are looking to lighten your load as a DM, I don't think they are at all typical. It really works best with experienced players who don't mind the added loaded.

I, myself, as a player take much more extensive notes as a player than as a DM. However, I don't expect that of my players, so when I DM I take my own notes. Besides, my players don't know what's important. An innocuous detail that they overlook could be quite important. I like to note things like that so that a dozen sessions down the road I can check back and see whether this was a detail that they've discovered (or not).

Imagine if you were an experienced DM introducing new players to D&D. You almost certainly don't want to offload your work on those players. At least not until they get more comfortable with the game in general. Casual players may also not want those responsibilities.

 

[Morrus]

The DM is currently the one performing the most important role in the game, but is not the most important person in the social group.

 

[hawkeyefan]

While those are all good things to do if you are looking to lighten your load as a DM, I don't think they are at all typical. It really works best with experienced players who don't mind the added loaded.

I, myself, as a player take much more extensive notes as a player than as a DM. However, I don't expect that of my players, so when I DM I take my own notes. Besides, my players don't know what's important. An innocuous detail that they overlook could be quite important. I like to note things like that so that a dozen sessions down the road I can check back and see whether this was a detail that they've discovered (or not).

Imagine if you were an experienced DM introducing new players to D&D. You almost certainly don't want to offload your work on those players. At least not until they get more comfortable with the game in general. Casual players may also not want those responsibilities.

Individually, none of these are all that difficult. What makes it challenging for a DM is to perform all these tasks along with those that are essential to the role.

Sharing them isn’t really asking that much. I think it also helps engage the players and keeps them more involved in the game, and less inclined to stop paying attention.

It also exposes them to elements of the game that maybe they’re not as aware of, which will likely make them better players and more ready to DM.

 

[CleverNickName]

Short answer: no.
Long answer: noooooo.

 

[The Green Hermit]

Individually, none of these are all that difficult. What makes it challenging for a DM is to perform all these tasks along with those that are essential to the role.

Sharing them isn’t really asking that much. I think it also helps engage the players and keeps them more involved in the game, and less inclined to stop paying attention.

It also exposes them to elements of the game that maybe they’re not as aware of, which will likely make them better players and more ready to DM.

My players are my family. I mainly play, because my kids asked to learn the game. However, even though most of them are teens, they are nowhere near ready to take on the role of the DM. I am currently working on getting them to take better notes (a skill some of them GREATLY need in school as well). I am also working on getting them to review certain parts of the PHB before each session. In time, hopefully some of them will be able to take some of the maintenance chores off of me, but for the foreseeable future, I am the only one who does this. And it is a TON of work, especially since I am just as new to this as the oldest kid at home is.

I would LOVE to have another group nearby in which I could just be a player and learn from that end, but even if my very full schedule would allow that, we live in too small of a community. I have thought about finding an online game, but the schedule thing is an issue.

 

[Fanaelialae]

Individually, none of these are all that difficult. What makes it challenging for a DM is to perform all these tasks along with those that are essential to the role.

Sharing them isn’t really asking that much. I think it also helps engage the players and keeps them more involved in the game, and less inclined to stop paying attention.

It also exposes them to elements of the game that maybe they’re not as aware of, which will likely make them better players and more ready to DM.

Maybe for your group. Like I said, I don't think this is nearly as typical or expected as you seem to be suggesting it is (or ought to be).