You say this is "fair" but immediately I see something that frustrates me. "In your honest opinion" FR is a kitchen sink, and therefore a mess.
But, didn't you say in your first point that there is no right and wrong for individual tables? Yet, one style is a mess. Messes aren't good. So, your honest opinion is that there is a better way. Your way. Because the other way is a mess.
So, in one part you present yourself as the reasonable party who doesn't judge the other side... and then you judge us. And I know it is just your opinion, I know it is just your preference, but maybe you could try to stop judging us while at the same time you say you aren't judging us?
Show me where I judge your table please. I stated FR, a world you had no hand in, was a mess. I said FR, a product of the game company, is a mess. If a table (which I am one of them), chooses to play it, that is okay. There is nothing wrong with that. It is fun. But, imo, it is a mess. I have not called anyone's creations here or their tables a mess. In fact, I have insisted that most of the people on here probably clean FR up.
So if you read it that way (that I am judging someone's table, you misinterpreted.
Here is the question you keep asking:
That one I bolded and underlined? That is the single reason being asked about. Every single other thing you listed? Pointless to the question because the question was "Is the reason "Because I don't like it" a good reason to ban something?".
When have I not answered this. I even answered it in my list. I believe if the guidelines are not clear and the DM is just banning it because they don't like it, that's wrong. I have stated this many times.
What I see from you is, that gets stated, and then you switch the debate to something else, like suddenly now, many of those reasons are "poor." Which really brings me to this:
Not sure why you think this is "deep down" when I have flat said that as a DM I try to accommodate my players. Do you think you are revealing some secret to me about my own preferences?
I am not revealing any secret. I am noting in my response that you change your answers, and when they change, they always lean towards the DM changing, not the player. Like I said, we agree on most of it. The DM should be clear. People should communicate. The DM should listen and be open. The player should respect the DM's work. The DM should respect the player's work. But once you go down the road of debating every single reason a DM can give for excluding a race, then you are not being open. You just want the DM to bend.
I admit a DM that has put in the work should be open minded. I also admit that they have the final say, and if it doesn't work for them, case closed. The player can make a different character.
But this forum has had that debate too. Players only being able to follow one character concept. I feel for those players. That has to be difficult. But, in D&D, the DM has the final say, especially if they are running their world.
But we have shown this by quoting the DMG, the PHB, Tasha's and Xanathar's. Yet, somehow, the DM not bending has been called "edgelord," "unimaginative," "pissy," "poor," "tapped," "diluted," and "dicks."
So take those words and go back to me calling FR a "mess." A mess because there are so many things in it. See if those words have the same connotation as, "unimaginative" or "pissy."
As a DM, why is it wrong of me to bend? Just because I put in a lot of work, work I did not need to put in?
I mean, if I didn't want to build my world.... I wouldn't. There are worlds that exist, or I could run in "Generica". I've got tons of options. But, because I put in unnecessary work for my own sake I need to suddenly become inflexible? That I need to know make my players "wrong" for even asking to change the things I built, which I build solely for my own sake?
I don't get it
For the hundredth time, it is not wrong for the DM to bend. They can and should - whether they put in the work or not. But, a DM that truly has put in the work, and a DM who hasn't, also has the right to say no to a race. I personally prefer the reasons where a DM has logic based on their work. But, I accept no from a DM who has not done that.
And if you are also asking why it's wrong for the DM to bend because the DM put in hundreds of hours of work into their world - why would a player want them to? Why would a player who is considerate of work and imagination, want their DM to have to do twenty more hours of work so they can play a single race for one campaign? Who is being selfish? It sounds like the player.