D&D 5E [Merged] Candlekeep Mysteries Author Speaks Out On WotC's Cuts To Adventure

In an event which is being referred to as #PanzerCut, one of the Candlekeep Mysteries authors has gone public with complaints about how their adventure was edited.

Book of Cylinders is one of the adventures in the book. It was written by Graeme Barber (who goes by the usernames PanzerLion and PoCGamer on social media).

Barber was caught by surprise when he found out what the final adventure looked like. The adventure was reduced by about a third, and his playable race -- the Grippli -- was cut. Additionally, WotC inserted some terminology that he considered to be colonialist, which is one of the things they were ostensibly trying to avoid by recruiting a diverse team of authors for the book.

His complaints also reference the lack of communication during the editing process, and how he did public interviews unknowingly talking about elements of an adventure which no longer existed.

"I wrote for [Candlekeep Mysteries], the recent [D&D] release. Things went sideways. The key issues were that the bulk of the lore and a lot of the cultural information that made my adventure "mine" were stripped out. And this was done without any interaction with me, leaving me holding the bag as I misled the public on the contents and aspects of my adventure. Yes, it was work-for-hire freelance writing, but the whole purpose was to bring in fresh voices and new perspectives.

So, when I read my adventure, this happened. This was effectively the shock phase of it all.

Then I moved onto processing what had happened. ~1300 words cut, and without the cut lore, the gravity of the adventure, and its connections to things are gravely watered down. Also "primitive" was inserted.

Then the aftermath of it all. The adventure that came out was a watered down version of what went in, that didn't reflect me anymore as a writer or creator. Which flew in the face of the spirit of the project as had been explained to me.

So then I wrote. Things don't change unless people know what's up and can engage with things in a prepared way. So I broke down the process of writing for Wizards I'd experienced, and developed some rules that can be used to avoid what happened to me."

He recounts his experiences in two blog posts:

• What happened? Writing for Wizards Part 1
• What Happened? Writing for Wizards Part 2

The author later added "Wizards owns all the material sent in, and does not publish unedited adventures on the DM Guild, so there will be no "PanzerCut". I have respectfully requested that my name be removed from future printings. "

 

[Charlaquin]

I can see the author's outrage at adding words and descriptions that he didn't intend. No argument there.

That being said, I find the particular outrage at the word in question hard to understand. Is primitive a bad word somehow?

primitive
1. relating to, denoting, or preserving the character of an early stage in the evolutionary or historical development of something.
"primitive mammals"

This definition is where the issue lies. Denoting “an early stage in the development” of human civilization is an inherently Euro-centric, colonialist concept.

How should rudimentary dwellings be described? What if the dwellings really are, you know, primitive?

Call me crazy, but I think rudimentary is a pretty good word to use to describe rudimentary dwellings. Radical, I know.

 

[Morrus]

How should rudimentary dwellings be described? What if the dwellings really are, you know, primitive?

I pick "rudimentary"!

 

[Greg Benage]

I pick "rudimentary"!

Shares its etymology with "rude." I offer "differently constructed."

 

[Bacon Bits]

"Rudimentary" is a pretty good synonym, for one.

I mean, they're described as mud huts. Do you really have to also describe mud huts as "primitive"? Are players going to think you've got whitewashed, two-story, timber frame, wattle and daub mansion without calling them "primitive"?

Ironically, the one example I can think of that shows how a mud walled shelter might be built with stone tools is from a YouTube channel called Primitive Technology:


Of course, the difference here is that his work isn't tied to a contemporary people or a culture, so it's not a value judgement on a people or a culture. He's just building things only with what he can make himself as an experiment in technology and old construction methods.

 

[Greg Benage]

Of course, the difference here is that his work isn't tied to a contemporary people or a culture, so it's not a value judgement on a people or a culture.

What if we're talking about frog-people who are pressed for time?

 

[Charlaquin]

We can rank them by in many ways and get value out of it. As I mentioned, we could rank them on how easy it is to build them, how comfortable they are, how well suited they are for certain climates. And yes, as part of the history of architecture, we also sort them by time periods. Does that seem that far fetched?

Not at all. These are all actually useful ways of categorizing buildings. What period of architectural history does “primitive” denote though? None that any historian or anthropologist I know would recognize.

 

[Greg Benage]

What period of architectural history does “primitive” denote though?

The Schmaltzy Period

Shop Farmhouse Style Home Decor Online - Items On Sale Now!

Piper Classics is your one-stop shop for country, primitive and farmhouse style home decor. Shop our inventory of curtains, quilts, rugs and more!

www.piperclassics.com

 

[Justice and Rule]

I mean, they're described as mud huts. Do you really have to also describe mud huts as "primitive"? Are players going to think you've got whitewashed, two-story, timber frame, wattle and daub mansion without calling them "primitive"?

Ironically, the one example I can think of that shows how a mud walled shelter might be built with stone tools is from a YouTube channel called Primitive Technology:


Of course, the difference here is that his work isn't tied to a contemporary people or a culture, so it's not a value judgement on a people or a culture. He's just building things only with what he can make himself as an experiment in technology and old construction methods.

I mean, what's the big difference between a sod house and a mud hut?

What if we're talking about frog-people who are pressed for time?

I mean, given that the author specifically didn't want them to fall into the trope of underdeveloped tribesmen (which has a bunch of problems) and wanted to present a civilization that was different rather than inferior, it feels like word choice would be important.

 

[TheSword]

They weren't badly built, but they were hastily built.

Spoiler: Minor spoilers for the adventure

The adventure starts when the PCs find a Grippli trading post whose residents recently fled their original village, relocated, and had to start over. The homes they have had to be built quickly.

However, it doesn't really matter, because they use the same word again.

Spoiler: Another minor spoiler

When you get to their original village the adventure describes the hunting trophies used to decorate that village as "primitive". By describing the decorations and artwork as primitive, they pretty clearly imply the culture of the Grippli is what's primitive.

The temporary shelters are also described as ramshackle and makeshift... so yes they are badly built... As opposed to the fortified mud brick main buildings that survived.

As I said, I don’t feel strongly about the word in this specific context either way. Offensive seems like a very strong way to describe it. Though I know enough to know by I don’t know enough.

I do think it’s worth considering that just because a word isn’t appropriate for academic anthropology doesn’t mean it doesn’t have a wider context. It’s also acceptable that not everyone agree on language.

Graeme is similarly allowed to ask for his credit to be removed. Though I think that is sad.

This adventure saw good Yuanti, and a sophisticated monstrous humanoid community under threat. I’ll consider those wins.

The fact that the adventure didn’t end up featuring details about a ancient time that Forgotten Realms authors have only barely alluded to, is probably just one of those things.

I also suspect 1300 words on an alternative route to the adventure site, unique Yuanti artifacts and a lot of exposition to explain why Yuanti are evil (that only the DM will know) is probably expecting too much.

As I said it’s sad, and a little bit disappointing that Graeme has resorted to ‘making noise’ and asking for the credit removal. It’s not exactly paving the way for future work, that he could have used to develop better relations and improve on things. I don’t think change was every going to come from one book... it was a start.

I’d be very interested to understand Daniel Kwans experience of the process. Particularly as he was a vocal critic (constructively) of how things could be done better. I wonder if he felt his voice was listened too.

[Edit- Found the second use of the word at the end of the section]

 

[Charlaquin]

What if we're talking about frog-people who are pressed for time?

If anything, the idea of comparing their architecture to real-world human history is even more absurd. It’s problematic enough to apply the path of European cultural change over time and prop it up as a standard for all human cultures. Applying it to fictional species in a fantasy setting is even more nonsensical.