I think it is too reductive to say that if a compromise is not reached then at least one person must have acted in bad faith. Sometimes people just have very different preferences that are too far apart for a compromise.
for the longest time they did, many still do
So every marriage that doesn't have one is guaranteed to eventually hit irreconcilable conflicts?
no one is talking about always calling the shots,
They
literally are.
Not sure why you call that the DM calling the shots or why you expect the DM to always cave in order to not be accused of it
For the umpteen-millionth time,
I DON'T AND NEVER HAVE.
Will you please stop putting words in my mouth? It'd be really nice.
no, it means it usually goes both ways and an actual compromise is found, but in those cases where it is not, what do you expect to happen?
Such cases are rare in the extreme. It then becomes "rare in the extreme" squared that such a thing happens where absolutely no one is behaving fully in good faith.
Since folks have spoken so derisively of hypothetical and theory: When does this actually happen? What are these alleged incredibly common utterly irreconcilable conflicts?
Are you forcing the DM to accept something they are not willing to accept?
Nope! Because both sides have to be willing to meet somewhere in the middle.
How is that any different from the players calling the shots at that point?
Because nobody is calling any shots. That's the point. You talk it out like reasonable people.
Also, good luck with that, so yes, if no compromise is reached, that player is out since they cannot very well force the DM to accept their wish regardless
So we're exactly back to where we were before: The DM forces
their will on everyone else. Because that's somehow wonderful and beautiful and awesome. But a player hoping for even the tiniest bit of reciprocity is an offense, an enemy, something to be driven out like the horrible awful monster it
oh so obviously is.
Do you not see this? As soon as someone asks for reciprocity, for the DM to compromise too, they're immediately told, "OH, SO NOW THE DM IS THE PLAYERS' SLAVE HUH? HOW IS THAT FAIR?"
It's not fair. Because that's not what they're asking for. They're asking for EVERYONE to approach the table expecting to
talk things out. Expecting to be heard fairly, and to hear fairly. Expecting to get perhaps not 100% perfectly exactly what they originally wanted, but to get something they can happily work with.
Instead, the only alternatives you offer are "DM dogmatically forcing their will on everyone else" or "DM sitting alone at their table because all the players left." How is that good? How is that helpful? How is that even remotely
better than being reasonable people and having a real conversation where you expect to listen AND be listened to?