D&D General How you would have done the Dungeons and Dragons' movie - 80's edition

[R_J_K75]

I'm surprised that we've gotten this far about a movie made in the 80s and no one has mentioned ninjas yet. It would have to have ninjas. Especially since OA would have just come out.

Yeah because what kid growing up in the 70s and 80s didn't want to be a ninja when they grew up?

 

[Meech17]

I think if I were in charge I'd only try to hire one big name actor for it. Perhaps cast them as the villain. Maybe Christopher Lloyd would make a good lich in a family friendly action-adventure flick.

Following in the theme of flashing back and forth from the "Real Life Players" to the "Heroes in the Game" Just use the same actors for both parts.

Have a fun cheesy ending, like the Lich is about to finish his ritual and plunge the world into un-ending darkness! The party's rogue, who didn't even want to play D&D is no-where to be seen. He's been a jerk the whole session. Stealing stuff from the party in-game.. Pressuring the DM, who's hosting, to show him where his dad stores his liquor.. But in the final hour when all seems lost, the rogue lands an amazing sneak attack on the lich, severing his hand right before he's able to cast the final sacrificial reagent in the brazier. Everyone cheers! Our rogue hugs the wizard, who despite being bullied by the rogue in and out of game, was the one who showed him how sneak attacks worked earlier in the movie.

The next day it shows our motley crew all hanging out together in the lunch room at school. Jocks and nerds, hanging out together.. It's absurd! But even crazier we see the mean school principal enter the room, played by none other than Christopher Lloyd, and he has a cast on his arm!!

 

[Sacrosanct]

Yeah because what kid growing up in the 70s and 80s didn't want to be a ninja when they grew up?

And the ninja would be portrayed in the least historical manner as possible.

 

[Dioltach]

I'd knock off The Princess Bride. Replace grandpa reading a book to his grandson with a group of kids playing D&D.

Have one kid be the reluctant one who didn't want to play, and ends up being the hero in the end.

And at the end of the epic adventure, the movie returns to the players, who by now are in their forties and wondering what happened to the time...

 

[sevenbastard]

Yeah because what kid growing up in the 70s and 80s didn't want to be a ninja when they grew up?

Not me, I just kind of fell into being a ninja to pay for a car as a teenager and by happenstance the job turned into a career. By my 30 I was trapped with nothing but ninja experience and too old to start over.

 

[KYRON45]

And at the end of the epic adventure, the movie returns to the players, who by now are in their forties and wondering what happened to the time...

I suggested this once not long ago. A movie Like Princess Bride or the Never Ending story. I was laughed out of the room and people picketed my house with torches.

D&D has no recognizable IP outside of the fact that its a game (and maybe its affiliation with satan). Sure, gentlemen of a certain age might know what "insert old timey module name here" is but very few others would. I'm of that age and never played a single published adventure.

We here know Drizzt, and Raistlin and Strahd (why wouldn't we, were adults commenting on message boards during work hours) but would the average movie goer? I'd be willing to bet that there are people who are fairly big fans of Salvatore and Hickman who have never played the game at all.

Any attempt at a D&D movie in any decade will fall short unless they lean back on the fact that the real value of the IP is that its friends creating their own drama and action based on their living experiences. Terrible British accents, swords and prophecies do not a D&D movie make.

OK...open the flood gates.

 

[payn]

They could have gotten anyone to be a new Terminator just based on the nature of the franchise, but they chose to opt for Arnold in lieu of a good script three times since T2. Even though Conan the Destroyer sucked, it's really hard to believe they couldn't get a decent script for a 3rd installment with him in 40 years.

While I think original Conan was much better, I didnt think Destroyer sucked. I actually, to this day, think its the best D&D like movie out there.

 

[payn]

I suggested this once not long ago. A movie Like Princess Bride or the Never Ending story. I was laughed out of the room and people picketed my house with torches.

lol, i'm sure I was one of them. I think this idea really depends on the timing. Then, it would look derivative of Princess Bride, now, it would look derivative of Jumanji. Of course, you have a whole host of folks who take their D&D very seriously, and want a Lord of the Rings type seriousness and tone., which would bomb too. I think the recent flick chose the right tone, but got clobbered by a bunch of blockbusters released around it. The story of D&D media is one of constantly getting its lunch eaten by other properties.

 

[R_J_K75]

While I think original Conan was much better, I didnt think Destroyer sucked. I actually, to this day, think its the best D&D like movie out there.

I have them both on DVD, but only watched the original when I bought the boxed set. I don't remember much about the premise of Destroyer, only that I thought is wasn't good. Perhaps I'll have to give it another watch sometime soon.

 

[TiQuinn]

lol, i'm sure I was one of them. I think this idea really depends on the timing. Then, it would look derivative of Princess Bride, now, it would look derivative of Jumanji. Of course, you have a whole host of folks who take their D&D very seriously, and want a Lord of the Rings type seriousness and tone., which would bomb too. I think the recent flick chose the right tone, but got clobbered by a bunch of blockbusters released around it. The story of D&D media is one of constantly getting its lunch eaten by other properties.

I think the latest D&D movie was a victim of people still being hesitant to go back to theaters after COVID. There weren’t a whole lot of blockbuster movies at the time. I think Spider-man had come out in Dec and then don’t recall anything big after that. Just bad timing IMO.