D&D General [rant]The conservatism of D&D fans is exhausting.

[ezo]

"Dissatisfied" counts "unhappy" as one of its synonyms in essentially every thesaurus I can find.

NOTHING in your prior post mentions unhappy and dissatisfied as synonyms. In fact, your own synonyms don't list unhappy:

Synonyms: vexation, indignation, dislike, distaste".

They may be subtly distinct things, but because their meanings are very similar and will (very frequently) be used interchangeably, saying "compromise always leaves everyone dissatisfied" will make a LOT of people think "oh, if I compromise, I will be unhappy."

I agree they are similar words, but they are measures of degrees, as I mentioned. But your claim that it makes a LOT of people think that is just that... your claim. Many people are dissatisfied with things but not unhappy about them.

I also disagree that happiness is exclusively about "joy". It can also be about being pleased with something. So if you aren't happy...you are displeased. Which is used, repeatedly, in the definition of "dissatisfied." Hence, the two are much more closely linked than you give any credit for.

Did I say "exclusively"? No, I didn't. Again, degrees.

Content is one degree, joy is another. Dissatisfied and unhappy are degrees as well. One does not automatically, or even likely, lead to the other.

People are 100% guaranteed to hear "dissatisfied" and think "unhappy." Not everyone! But lots and lots. Far too many to write it off as an inconsequential nothing.

LOL really??? You're a mind-reader now?! 100% guaranteed, huh, and then backtracking to "Not everyone!".

No, not everyone, not many people IME. And frankly many people are only willing to compromise on something if they really don't care much in the first place. If they do care about it, then any compromise will often (not always, but often) lead to being unhappy.

Anyway, this has been fun, but gotta run. We can continue it later if you wish.

 

[Belen]

No, not everyone, not many people IME. And frankly many people are only willing to compromise on something if they really don't care much in the first place. If they do care about it, then any compromise will often (not always, but often) lead to being unhappy.

This is learned or taught behavior though. People are being told that they have a right to their happiness and that compromise is bad.

Compromise should lead to a place where both parties can live and be happy with the outcome. People should not live expecting that they must get their way to be happy.

If happiness is that narrow, then they can never be happy.

I try to live my life within a range or spectrum that allows for compromise.

However, sorry, Ezekial, I still will not run 4e.

 

[Bae'zel]

Bad gaming might be worse than no gaming, but there's a pretty broad spectrum of "good enough" gaming before you reach that point.

"Good enough" is subjective, yeah, but I'm past the point of "tolerating mediocrity".

I am old enough to have no patience for activities that do not bring me immediate joy. Enough scary health issues to appreciate what little life I have left.

It took me years to reach that point, for sure. I've had enough bad, or simply BORING sessions to have the bar set very low for my tolerance levels.

 

[ezo]

People are being told that they have a right to their happiness and that compromise is bad.

Who is being told this? And by whom??

Compromise should lead to a place where both parties can live and be happy with the outcome. People should not live expecting that they must get their way to be happy.

I agree, but often people are not "happy" with an outcome, but might be satisfaied or content with it. But then you have to ask why? Is it because they don't care enough to "fight for what they want" and are willing to compromise? Is it because they can accept "Well, nobody got what they want so I can live with that"? Or was it something else...

Because why they can compromise will often determine where the ultimately end up. Satisfied, happy, unhappy, resentful, or what.

If happiness is that narrow, then they can never be happy.

I see your point, but I suppose that is up to the person. I think a lot of it is about picking your battles, so to say, and if a person does feel like everything is a battle--well, then you're probably right.

I try to live my life within a range or spectrum that allows for compromise.

Personally, I don't compromise probably as much as I could, but I'm okay with that and (frankly speaking) enjoy my "me time."

 

[James Gasik]

no, they're not trolling, they're making a good point and i can see exactly where they're coming from, "a good compromise is where both parties are dissatisfied" absolutely is an awful perspective, because it implants in people the idea that 'if you compromise you're going to be unhappy with the result' so it doesn't actually incline people to want to compromise on things, it inclines them to dig in and fight tooth and nail to get things done their way because they're primed to think their experience is going to suck otherwise.

a far better line would be 'a good compromise is where both parties get everything that they needed but not everything that they wanted'

That reminds me of what the philosopher Jagger once said...

 

[Micah Sweet]

Yeah, I thought about that, and I keep meaning to try solo RPGing myself at some point (mostly because of the broad library of RPGs I'll never get to play otherwise), but I personally think of solo RPGing as a related but separate hobby from the main TTRPG space. Midway between the TTRPG space and the journaling/creative writing space. The interaction (and compromises ) with other people around the table (virtual or physical) in a shared imaginative world is what really makes the hobby for me.

I'm really interested in Solodark. Seems like a fun way to pursue solo gaming.

 

[BrokenTwin]

I'm really interested in Solodark. Seems like a fun way to pursue solo gaming.

Right now I've got Ironsworn, Thousand Year Old Vampire, and Celestial Bodies on my "try solo" shortlist. But I do really prefer playing with a group.

 

[CreamCloud0]

That reminds me of what the philosopher Jagger once said...

reference not understood

 

[Swarmkeeper]

That reminds me of what the philosopher Jagger once said...

Yes!

And, I think a key part of that philosophy is in the “if you try”. It’s not automatic that it will happen, only “sometimes you get what you need”. Complaining and expecting change without continuing to put in the effort is not a success strategy.

 

[Staffan]

reference not understood