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Say, Gary.... Have you had the chance to check out the "word play game" topic here? Not only is it hysterical, I'd guess it would be right up your alley, given your love of punnery and wordsmithing! ;)

Pismatic Spray- Target is soaked in various shades of urine, each which has a different effect. Burping Hands- Target's hands begin loudly bringing up gas. Bugury- Divination spell cast to determine whether or not you'll get in trouble for "doing it" that way. Lizard Lock- Prevents lizards...

Mirrior of Life Crapping- If you see your reflection in this glass, make a Fort save or spend the rest of your days on the toilet. Cursed Spear of Rackbiting- When a female fighter uses this weapon, it bites her in the chest. Periapt of Foul Rutting- The wearer of this gem attracts, and is...

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! Nice!!!!!!!!!! :lol:

D'oh!!!!!! :p More terms: Amor Class: A measure of how immune your PC is to falling in love. Sex-Sided Die: Another term used to describe those erotic gag dice sold at Spencer Gifts Monster Manuel: This Portuguese guy who sells monsters, cheap! Dungeon Basters Guide: A large book that...

OK, file this one under "Wow..." I find it particularly interesting, given that at least two of us on this board have the name "Smurf" in our handles. ;) I got this off of Yahoo. ============================== It's just another smurfy day in Smurf Village. The perpertually perky blue beings...

James You are absolutely correct. The town won't hold it against them. It's just that my players not only have big consciences, they like solving problems in such a way that it causes the minimal amount of grief to anyone around them (a lot of them are Chaotic Good). I probably should have done...

Morcus- Demon Prince of hyperactive comedians in the 1980's. Na-nu na-nu...now DIE!!!!! Jubileex- Teenage superheroine with powers over slimes and oozes. Excelsior! Domogorgon- Okay, picture this 12' tall scaly thing with two baboon heads and tentacles for arms. Now, picture it wearing a...

These are a riot, esp the Boomeringue and Fistinpantsalot! Well, in the spirit of Dragonlance: Hasslehoff Burrfoot: An annoying kender who sings, is wicked popular in Europe, rescues drowning swimmers, and has at least one level in Knight Rider prestige class.

Time for some Oriental AD&D!!!!! Binja- An assassin who leaps out of garbage cans and attacks the unwary. Tushido- The Japanese warrior art of making an ass of yourself. Katanga- A tramp steamer captain who acts as a samurai's favored weapon. Mu-jen- A Japanese bovine mage. Shuripen- It's a...

My Forgotten Realms group of player characters currently consists of: MARMORAN- A human female middle-aged cranky cleric of Talona with a terminal illness. Think of Slappy Squirrel from Anamaniacs, if she was a priestess of a goddess of sickness and poison, and was slowing dying- 6th level...

Curt Schilling, one of our beloved World Series 2004 heroes, is stubborn, intractable, and has an opinion on everything. Of COURSE he's a gamer! ;) And don't think I hadn't gotten a lot of mileage this past year with my fellows sports fans who are into it way more than me, when they've...

Why, thank you! Thank you very much! :)

And I just need to say, YOU are extremely cool! :D ::Dancing on the freshly dug grave of the Yankees::

Ahhh I forget what the heck it's called. They had it on the President's Council On Physical Fitness Test back in the 70's...it was the 600 yard something or other. But yeah...not a dash ;) I guess I should also pipe in with the fact that I'm in a fantasy football league, and was in a fantasy...

Damn straight... Hey, I'm a Red Sox fan, although I've always been, and always will be, an RPG fan first and foremost. But, if I tell people "Hey I'm going to the Sox game tonight!", I get a lot of knowing smiles and nods, and "Lucky guy!"..If I say "Hey, I'm going to a gaming con," I get a...

Here's my version of being a rat bastard DM. And the players don't know it's happened yet. My campaign's set in the Forgotten Realms, Silver Marches. I've placed a sleepy little town called Fellwood along Evermoor Way. Nice little town, inhabited by around 200 farmers, shepherds, a few...

I LOVE IT!!!!!!!!!!!!! :lol:

Shield Uther- Keeps King Arthur's dad safe. Help Hound- A Saint Bernard, with a cask of brandy round its neck Manic Missile- First level spell fires a bolt of energy, victim commences running around in a hyperactive state. Fund Familiar- Conjures up some spare change for an arcane...

:::bows to Poet::: Many thanks, oh creator of many humorous entries as well!!!!! :cool: