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I honestly don't know how Oklahomans manage to do lots of the things they do. But on topic: they apply branded labels to almost everything--tissues are all "Kleenexes," all headache medicines are called "Tylenols," etc.

In Oklahoma, this is a common conversation at mealtime: Joe: Do you want a coke? Bob: Sure. Joe: What kind? Bob: Dr. Pepper. Yep, I grew up referring to all brown carbonated beverages as "coke" regardless of their flavor. Root beer, cola, cream soda, or ginger ale...Coke or Pepsi or Dr...

What do you call this? Image: iStock

Nah, we've been gaming together for 14 years, I have a pretty good handle on what they care about and what they like. They just each assumed that someone else would have a lantern or light cantrip.

SYLVAN SLINGSHOT Weapon (sling), uncommon (requires attunement) This sling is made from supple leather and braided cord, and would be completely ordinary-looking if it weren't for the faint Elvish runes embroidered on the pouch. While attuned to this sling, you know the Magic Stone cantrip and...

For me, it looks like this. In the first adventure of the last campaign I ran, we had a whole party of Humans and Goliaths and Firbolgs...and nobody noticed during Session Zero that none of them had darkvision. So they entered the dungeon, accidentally fell down a chute, and were dropped into...

Thanks for the recommendation. I'm not really looking for a new system; the 2014 edition of D&D suits our group just fine. Until 5E no longer works for us, we don't have any real pressure to switch to anything else. I was a little excited about it when it first was announced, thinking that I...

Ya know, the more I learn about the 2024 rules changes, and the more "just use the 2014 rule for that" posts I come across, the more comfortable I am with my decision to stay with the original 5E.

A Texan took a vacation to New England. He had only been at the hotel for 2 days, but everyone was already sick of hearing about how "everything is bigger in Texas." The toast? "It's bigger in Texas." The trucks? "We have bigger ones in Texas." The tomatoes? "Oh that's nothing, you should...

Here's a matching set of exorcism-related items. The idea is that if all three of them are found and attuned by the same person, they would have a full suite of tools for capturing and exorcising a troublesome fey, demon or haint. THE BELL OF ANATHEMA Wondrous Item, rare (requires attunement...

GIGGLEFIT'S HONKER Wondrous item, uncommon (requires attunement) This small brass horn has a rubber squeeze ball attached where the mouthpiece should be. When squeezed, the horn emits a silly, distinct "a-OOO-gah" sound, followed by a few seconds of distant laughter. While attuned to this...

GIGGLEFIT'S SQUIRTING FLOWER Wondrous item, uncommon (requires attunement) This artificial flower pendant is made from silk and silver wire, and is intended to be worn on the lapel. It resembles a harmless squirting-flower prank, the sort that might squirt people with water when they lean...

GIGGLEFIT'S PALM BUZZER Ring, uncommon (requires attunement) This small round device has a metal finger loop on the bottom, allowing it to be worn backwards on the middle finger and concealed in the palm. By all accounts, it resembles a harmless hand-buzzer prank, intended to surprise people...

SINNING GINNY'S LIPSTICK Wondrous item, uncommon (requires attunement) This red cosmetic ointment was created by a famous local alchemist, as a gift for his favorite local escort. It is always the perfect compliment for your skin tone and outfit, and no matter how many times it is used, the...

SILVER SCISSORS Weapon (dagger), uncommon (requires attunement) These elegant silver scissors are of Elven make, and never tarnish or require sharpening. They may be wielded in combat as a silver dagger +1. While attuned to these scissors, you know the Mending cantrip.