1,001 ways they could screw up 4th Edition D&D...

[Aloïsius]

77. The DMG is all about random dungeon, wandering monsters and looting them. 224 pages full of random tables, including the "100 adventure hooks".

 

[TheCrazyMuffinMan]

78. PHB partially ghost-written by the White Wolf team (The WoD games have their strengths for sure, but their writing... YEESH!).

"Slay living calls the anger of the gods into your mere vessel, stealing the life from a deserving victim and adding it to the ether. The gods will not raise him, but resurrection is possible with a fervent enough plea."

 

[Andor]

79. Weapon speed factors return.

 

[Pale]

80. Requiring a monthly fee and a computer to play.

 

[Thurbane]

81. Making Demons and Devils morph back into beings with less socially inflammatory names.

82. Assume that ALL D&D fans are into Wuxia and Anime - combat that doesn't include 50 foot leaps and mountain shattering blasts of energy with each attack will be a thing of the past.

83. Vancian casting is finally and unceremoniously taken behind the woodshed and "put to sleep". All casters are now spontaneous and use Charisma as their casting stat.

84. All of the new mechanics introduced in supplemental material in 3/3.5E become core (psionics, stances, maneuvres, invocations, incarnum, pact magic, shadow magic, truename magic etc.)

 

[Aloïsius]

84. All of the new mechanics introduced in supplemental material in 3/3.5E become core (psionics, stances, maneuvres, invocations, incarnum, pact magic, shadow magic, truename magic etc.)

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85. The 288 pages PHB is written in size 5 time new roman

 

[Thurbane]

86. Having Marlon Wayans reprise his "Snails" role as the spokescharacter for 4E!

 

[Ulrick]

87. 4e is just 3.5 without all the errata and repackaged to look different, but the text is just the same.

 

[Thurbane]

88. D&D 4E is even less proofread and playtested than 3E - glaring statblock errors and text contradicting tables.

89. Two words: classless roleplay.

90. The basic "fighting man" no longer exists - all forms of warrior have pseudo-magical abiltities.

 

[Ulrick]

88. A Jar-Jar Binks-like character becomes an iconic.