A question for the women...a pregnant PC?

[Oryan77]

This is a question mainly for the female players...

Earlier today I had an idea for our game and although I think it would be very interesting, I've come to learn that anytime the DM alters a PCs situation in a pretty big way, it can cause the player to be very upset even when you thought it would be neat.

A few sessions ago, the Sorceress PC (my wifes PC) slept with a charming & very popular man in a town they just visited for the first time. She has been playing this character for 5 years and this is the first time she has ever been romantic with an NPC other than occasional flirting. The session after that she visited the NPC again.

Today I started to think about this relationship and what she doesn't know. I have a lot of potential plot lines I can pull out of this.

For one, although the other members of the party are leery of this NPC and don't quite trust him, they don't know that he's actually Lawful Evil. He comes across as being a very good guy and every single person in town genuinely respects him. I guess he's sort of like a mob boss without actually having a mob. So if I needed to, I can use him as an antagonist against the PCs...but he has no reason to be an enemy of the PCs at the moment. If he committed an evil act in front of the PCs, it would be a pretty surprising revelation (and my wife would probably be more attracted to him *she's chaotic neutral*).

Then when I thought of her relationship with him, I thought "What if she had his baby?" Being a pregnant adventurer would be a very different obstacle to deal with. I thought a player might hate dealing with that, but then I thought the player might think it's cool having a child that they get to watch grow up as their PC grows up. Then I thought it would even be neat if the player played the child as a PC if her character died or retired.

I thought it would be a good storyline if I had this evil guy try to exploit his child and use it for his own evil purposes. That could turn him into a pretty interesting reoccurring villain if the PCs try to keep him from the kid.

But I'm worried that what I think is a great idea and would definitely be a shock to the group (finding out she's pregnant), would actually be embarrassing to a female player. Do women mostly find this type of situation an annoyance rather than an interesting character development? My wife has also been talking about having a kid in RL an awful lot lately, so she might like this

 

[Alzrius]

So, to be clear, you're not asking about what your wife would think of her character becoming pregnant, but what the other members of your gaming group (particularly female players in the group) would think about it?

Bearing in mind that I'm not female, my character's only reaction would be to persuade her to stop adventuring until she had the kid. Being pregnant carries some rather mean penalties.

 

[Tewligan]

The part of me that slows down to watch car crashes says for you to do this, and make sure that the first she finds out about it is when you announce it in the game. That part also wants you to let us know how it goes, in delicious detail.

The smaller part of me that sometimes tries to give good advice suggests that you raise this possible development with her outside of the game and see if she'd be comfortable with it before you even think of introducing it into the game.

Oh, and I'm not a woman, FWIW. Just thought I'd give my advice anyway. Let's see if the womenfolk agree with me! Ladies...?

 

[Tewligan]

So, to be clear, you're not asking about what your wife would think of her character becoming pregnant, but what the other members of your gaming group (particularly female players in the group) would think about it?

You're not clear. When he mentions "female players" finding it embarrassing, I think he's referring specifically to female players in that situation, i.e., his wife.

 

[Clueless]

There are a number of considerations with this sort of idea that your characters in game would need to consider. For example : would a raise dead spell work on the unborn child? Would a party paladin - not knowing if it would or not - even allow the mother in the danger in the first place? What about babysitting? Or taking an infant into the dungeon? Or hostage risks? There's lots of perfectly good reasons to retire the PC in those circumstances so if you don't want to see that happen you'll need to have a story that accounts for it and gives both reason to continue adventuring and opportunity to find solutions to those problems.

I don't know the sort of time scale you're adventure runs on - but if it's like many I've played in - the entire adventure occurs over the course of a year or less. That's not a lot of 'growing up' time there, and a lot of 'god this is a lot of weight to lug around and Now you want me to hit someone with a sword too!?' kind of time. So you will need to weight the impact of the situation on your game and game scope.

The other difficulty is with your players. This *very much* shouldn't be a surprise for the player of the pregnant PC, it's a potentially emotionally difficult subject. And if she is emotionally invested in the character and given that you've mentioned her interest in real life.. you stand to get unexpected emotional backlash if something goes wrong (see the above re: Raise Dead). She may honestly not want to roleplay the situation as it may cut a little too close to the truth.

The rest of the players are up to your judgement of their personalities for if they'd want to work with it. We don't have enough information on them.

 

[Ciaran]

The smaller part of me that sometimes tries to give good advice suggests that you raise this possible development with her outside of the game and see if she'd be comfortable with it before you even think of introducing it into the game.

Yes. This is unquestionably the best approach.

 

[hunter1828]

As others have said, don't spring this on her like the other players. Talk to her about it first and if she is ok with the idea, then it's cool to surprise the other players with it.

Several years ago in a game I ran, my wife's female magic-user and an NPC ranger/cleric were a couple. My wife and I decided it would be fun and interesting if her character got pregnant, and she felt up to the challenge of playing a pregnant wizard. It was a surprise to the other players, but they took it well and became extremely protective of her. Well, all but one who couldn't understand why the wizard couldn't ride a horse just because she was 8 months pregnant...

It did result in many fun RP situations, such as when she started craving certain foods and half the party made a trek through deep snow into town in order to get what she wanted. She also took to memorizing several Floating Disk spells each day and used them to get around instead of walking.

It can be a lot of fun, but talk it over with your wife first.

 

[Barastrondo]

My wife would break my kneecaps if I pulled a surprise pregnancy on one of her characters. Other female players may vary, of course, but it would really piss her off. She would be particularly upset if I suggested "Say, if your character dies, you could play her child" — after all, the child isn't her character or even her idea. Her character is the one she created. The result of a DM-mandated pregnancy is pretty much the DM's character, and I know that my wife would feel no sense of personal attachment or ownership to the baby. Her character would, of course — but that would put her in a position of having her character care about something she'd rather not deal with in the game, and probably make her think about retiring her former PC and rolling up a brand-new character without that problem.

Listen to that voice that tells you "Yes, the player may not think it's nearly as neat a situation as you do." She might — but you're better off asking her about it first. If you want to be oblique about it, try asking her "So, does your character regularly use some sort of contraceptive?" You don't have to commit to the pregnancy that way, you can avoid metagaming questions like the point-blank "Would you be interested in having your character get pregnant?" and how she reacts to the question will probably give you a good idea of how to proceed. I had a female player who was very clear when we first started gaming that her character did indeed seek out and use contraceptives conscientiously. That was a good way of letting me know "Not interested in a pregnancy, thanks."

 

[Dark Mistress]

I personally never have nor have any desire to do so. It would be hard to keep playing the PC. At least towards the end she would have to stop adventuring. After the child is born even if family took care of it, it could still cause problems.

It depends a lot on how you run your game if it takes years or decades from start to finish it is less of a issue.

But this is NOT something to spring on a player no matter how much you like the idea. I suggest talking to her, and just tell her you have the idea. Lay out why you think it would be a good thing, listen to her responses and or concerns and go from their. She might like the idea but if she doesn't, she will likely be as POed about it as if you came to the table and said.

Jim's character Targen has a flesh eating disease and their is no cure. Of course you didn't get a save but I thought he would be neat to have him know he is dieing and try to race against time to finish the heroic quest, before he dies.

Not exactly the same thing but you could expect a similar reaction.

 

[Oryan77]

So, to be clear, you're not asking about what your wife would think of her character becoming pregnant, but what the other members of your gaming group (particularly female players in the group) would think about it?

I'm mainly interested in what other women players would think if their DM told them that their PC is pregnant. But I would be interested in hearing what other players might think if they also found out that a fellow female PC is pregnant.

What about babysitting? Or taking an infant into the dungeon? Or hostage risks?

When I thought about this I considered doing things like having longer "down time" periods between adventures. If the PC needed to do a job after having the child, the father could act as the babysitter which initiates the exploitation of the kid. I would definitely adjust the campaign flow to allow her to play her PC during times when it wouldn't endanger the child. As I said though, I haven't given this much thought yet so I'm not sure how that would work out in reality.

raise this possible development with her outside of the game and see if she'd be comfortable with it before you even think of introducing it into the game.

I thought of doing this but the stubborn side of me says, "That would ruin the realism of the world". Realism in a fantasy game? Yeah I know but it's like me warning ahead of time that an item is cursed & asking them if they'd like to put it on. Or like God coming down and asking her if she wants to get pregnant for sleeping with the NPC. I know it's a serious enough angle to warrant an out of game discussion though....what do other people think about asking her before I do it?