Iron Sky
Procedurally Generated
DON'T TRY TO DECEIVE US WITH YOUR AMIABLE MANNER, FOUL WARLOCK... WHICH ONE OF YOU IS THE WARLOCK ANYWAY? CLEVER HOW YOU USE CHILDREN TO SHIELD YOU - BUT I SEE THROUGH YOUR TRICKS; THEY ARE ZOMBIES IN DISGUISE!
In a few quick strides Sir Exsixten is across the room, one child held aloft as he stares at it.
HM, NO, THIS ONE SEEMS TO BE A CHILD, Sir Exsixten says, carefully setting it down and patting it on the head. DON'T GROW UP TO BE EVIL OR YOU WILL SOME DAY FACE ANOTHER CHAMPION OF THE LORDS OF AWESOME BREAKING INTO YOUR PUNY TOWER AND SEARCHING YOUR CHILDREN FOR SIGNS OF ZOMBIE!
He kneels in the midst of the children, hoisting each one individually to make sure they aren't zombies then dispatching a useful bit of advice with a pat on the head when he determines they aren't.
AHAH, THIS ONE IS CUNNINGLY DISGUISED AS A... NO, IT'S A CHILD... DON'T PICKPOCKET A LEPER, CHILD, YOU'LL PROBABLY END UP WITH MORE THAN YOU WANT...
WHAT PUTRID ZOMBIFICATION HIDES BENEATH THIS BUTTON NOSE AND HUGE CUTE EYES... HM, THIS ONE MIGHT BE A ZOMBIE, BUT IT EXCEEDS ALL KNOWN CUTEIOSITY LEVELS, NO HARM MUST BEFALL IT... STAY SAFE SON, STAY AWAY FROM SORCERY, DOING IT TOO MUCH CAN MAKE YOU GO BLIND AND GROW HAIR ON YOUR PALMS... OR WAS THAT SOMETHING ELSE...
PESTILENCE! THIS ONE UNLEASHED A BREATH WEAPON OF FOUL PLAGUE UPON ME... <DEFINITION: SNEEZE - ANALYZING...> AH, TAKE BETTER CARE OF THIS ONE BEFORE ITS LITTLE DISEASE GROWS UP AND BECOMES A DEATH PLAGUE... TINY FILTH PROJECTOR! SHOULD YOU FIND YOURSELF TRANSFORMING INTO A CONTAGION-BEAST, I ADVISE YOU TO PERFORM A COST-BENEFIT ANALYSIS ON YOUR NEW STATE TO DETERMINE IF MORE MEMBERS OF THE GENERAL POPULACE WOULD BENEFIT OR DIE WRITHING FROM YOUR PRESENCE AND TAKE APPROPRIATE PERSONAL ACTION BASED ON YOUR FINDINGS!
In a few quick strides Sir Exsixten is across the room, one child held aloft as he stares at it.
HM, NO, THIS ONE SEEMS TO BE A CHILD, Sir Exsixten says, carefully setting it down and patting it on the head. DON'T GROW UP TO BE EVIL OR YOU WILL SOME DAY FACE ANOTHER CHAMPION OF THE LORDS OF AWESOME BREAKING INTO YOUR PUNY TOWER AND SEARCHING YOUR CHILDREN FOR SIGNS OF ZOMBIE!
He kneels in the midst of the children, hoisting each one individually to make sure they aren't zombies then dispatching a useful bit of advice with a pat on the head when he determines they aren't.
AHAH, THIS ONE IS CUNNINGLY DISGUISED AS A... NO, IT'S A CHILD... DON'T PICKPOCKET A LEPER, CHILD, YOU'LL PROBABLY END UP WITH MORE THAN YOU WANT...
WHAT PUTRID ZOMBIFICATION HIDES BENEATH THIS BUTTON NOSE AND HUGE CUTE EYES... HM, THIS ONE MIGHT BE A ZOMBIE, BUT IT EXCEEDS ALL KNOWN CUTEIOSITY LEVELS, NO HARM MUST BEFALL IT... STAY SAFE SON, STAY AWAY FROM SORCERY, DOING IT TOO MUCH CAN MAKE YOU GO BLIND AND GROW HAIR ON YOUR PALMS... OR WAS THAT SOMETHING ELSE...
PESTILENCE! THIS ONE UNLEASHED A BREATH WEAPON OF FOUL PLAGUE UPON ME... <DEFINITION: SNEEZE - ANALYZING...> AH, TAKE BETTER CARE OF THIS ONE BEFORE ITS LITTLE DISEASE GROWS UP AND BECOMES A DEATH PLAGUE... TINY FILTH PROJECTOR! SHOULD YOU FIND YOURSELF TRANSFORMING INTO A CONTAGION-BEAST, I ADVISE YOU TO PERFORM A COST-BENEFIT ANALYSIS ON YOUR NEW STATE TO DETERMINE IF MORE MEMBERS OF THE GENERAL POPULACE WOULD BENEFIT OR DIE WRITHING FROM YOUR PRESENCE AND TAKE APPROPRIATE PERSONAL ACTION BASED ON YOUR FINDINGS!
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