Biggest Hero Blunders?

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Ciliphan Galaril calmly watches as his more missile-inclined companions help stave off the gnoll invasion... Upon the hillock, the army of Little Dell and Band of Twilight fire arrows, bolts, and spells at the dogmen--dropping them like goblins...

Suddenly from the forest caves, roaring into the fray come gnoll-trained girallons! Four-armed, savage, albino gorillas! They storm up the hills tearing through the peasant armies--dropping them like goblins...

One particularly fierce girallon rushes the Band's hill, with hot rage burning in its eyes...

This is my chance to shine...and show the party what I'm made of, thinks the newly recruited Ciliphan. He hefts his falchion in his oak-colored, elven hands--muscles taut with the adrenaline of battle. The mutant gorilla's hackles raise as it sniffs the air and tosses aside a ragdoll peasant...

This is my chance... Ciliphan charges the girallon, whose enormous simian head turns to face its foe... The calm, focused wood elf manages a potent cut through the creature's thick abdomen, and he thinks:

Why rely on bows and spells? A fine sword and strong arms--

Strong arms... The enemy girallon's four powerful arms thrust vicious claws at Ciliphan, ripping through his leather armor and drawing blood. Ciliphan guards against what he can, but the beast is simply too strong to block! Each claw then grabs an elven limb....arm, arm, leg, leg...and PULLS...

Ciliphan shrieks as he is rended limb from shredded limb, and the Band of Twilight share a collective wince.


Poor, poor Ciliphan...he was only a 4th level fighter, and decided to full attack a girallon. Just one example of a hero blunder...

What've you got? :)
 
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"Ok, so its just subdued right? Alright, I'm the Paladin, I crawl into the Chimera's Dragon mouth to provide full cover to the party in case it wakes up!" (1 in 10 chance each minute) ...
it woke up...

"Scrying? Bah, who cares if we're getting scry'd upon! We teleport to the Lich and attack!" (almost a TPK)
...

"The Paladin is raging and out of control? I walk past him to the door, he won't attack me he's Lawful good!" (threat, crit, -14hit points = dead wizzy elf)
...

"The Drow is waiting on the other side of the room and laughing at us and gesturing for us to fight him? We run across the room!" (2 dead PCs and 4 unconcious ones who made their drowning checks later...)
...

"Right. So the Paladin is in the subdued Chimera's mouth right? And we need to take it alive? I cast Heal on it." (Cleric of said earlier Paladin example)...
...

"I throw them on the bon-fire!!" (Barbarian whos is the only one not passed out from fear during the parties attempt to "Kill a dragon!" at 2nd level. He rolled Heal check to see if they were alive, got a Nat1, had -3 Wisdom, and seeing that they were dead, threw their bodies on the fire to keep them from becoming Undead)
...

"I'm tired of waiting for you to answer the Sphinxes riddle! I step into the room with the 2 glowing Symbols of Death!" (Paladin)
...

"Ok, you kill those two heads of the hydra, and I'll kill these two! No, we don't need fire!? Who ever heard of a hydra regenerating back heads?"
...

"Um. You realize the Paladin is the only one who can kill this thing before it destroys us??.." (Rogue to Cleric after the Paladin was killed by willingly failing his "save" vs. the Chimera's breath weapon in order to shield the party) :D
 

Hm.

"If I can't squeeze past my ally in this narrow Tunisian alleyway, I'll jump over him to attack the villain!" "Oof!" THUD. "He's getting away." "I can see that. Get off me."

Then there are spoilers I won't share. Things like "Why to never fight a Death Knight at low levels" and "I prise open the metal iris".
 

I've got a trillion of these. How about this:

It's an epic level campaign. We're invading hell. On a Halruuan airship specially modded for the war, the party is ambushed by a greater mummy imp riding a paragon advespa. They dispatch the advespa rapidly, and the imp proceeds to blast the party with spell after powerful spell. After disabling half of the party and severly wounding the other half, the rogue/assassin/ninja has finally finished studying the imp and prepares to show off his newly aquired feat of death attacking the undead. He rolls and hits!...
But he should have turned off his ring of blinking. Went incorporeal just as the blade swung.

Demiurge out.
 

So that last one was more of a simple "bad luck" gaffe then a total screw-up. This one, however...
The scene is in Rokugan. The party has tracked the ghost of the Blood Sorcerer Iuchiban to the Festering Pit of Fu Leng, where he intedns to release Fu Leng from his prison in Gekido to destroy Rokugan.
The party manages to get the drop on him, sneaking up along a cliff overlooking the pit. Iuchiban is too busy casting the summoning spell to notice them. The fighter/rogue (why is it always rogues in these stories?), who happens to be wearing a cursed ring that is slowly turning him into a cat, decides that the best way to dispatch the threat is to leap from higher ground onto Iuchiban, tackling him and disrupting the spell.

He forgot that ol' Iuchi was incorporeal.

Having a catman pass through your body is distracting though, and Iuchiban's spell was disrupted. Of course, this was cold comfort to the rogue as the creeping doom ate the flesh from his bones.

Demiurge out.
 

"We sneak past the giant mutated dire tiger"
rogue makes it, ranger makes it, fighter...makes it, paladin *CLANK* *CLANK**CLANK*
Tiger wakes up
Paladin: I run into the hall the others are safely in, I can move through their 5ft. square, no one takes up a 5ft by 5ft square, except you of course (directed at me, strike 3 :D).
Ranger: no you aren't, I take an action to stop him from getting past me.
Tiger: Roar, claws paladin, doesn't start a grapple
Paladin: I make a bull rush, get's past ranger, fighter stops him from advancing.
Tiger: Claws paladin again, doesn't start a grapple
Paladin: bull rushes past fighter "finally, I'm out of his reach"
Tiger: extends long sticky tongue, grapples, and bites.
chomp, chomp, chomp
Paladin: I attack it
Tiger: chomp chomp chomp
Paladin: Hoping to get some sympathy, I heal it with my most powerful healing spell.
Tiger: Chomp chomp, gulp.
A bit long but hey.

"Let's walk down this 200ft. corridor without searching."

"Hey, an illithid with a giant sword, a bunch of mutants, and a portal, let's attack him"

I had a great one, I'll add it later.
 

Most classic and seemingly most popular blunder...i made a paladin! The fact that he was stupid only compounded interest instantly for the last five years.
 

The party enters into a bar which is full of orcs. As it so happens, one of the characters is a rabid anti-orc bigot. Can't stand the sight of all those orcs so he decides to waste them all with a fireball. Unfortunately, said PC did this while the party WAS STILL INSIDE THE BAR!!! And of course, our PC failed to take into account the combustive nature of alcohol, which was flowing freely in said bar.

Suffice to say, the other players weren't to happy with the player of that character once the fire got put out.

*whistles innocently*

* * * * * *

And yet more fun with fireball, though with a different player. This player thought it'd be a dandy idea to lob a fireball down a cavern. He should've paid more attentions to the DM's flavor text, though. Especially to the part where the DM mentioned the methane emissions in the cavern...

* * * * * *

The above player had some more chances to disgrace himself in later games. This time he was a Fighter who apparently picked the wrong fight. With who, you may ask? An orc barbarian? A hill giant? A troll? Nope.

He picked a fight with a horse. And the horse won.

One round, two hoof attacks, a critical with each, and BOOM! The result? One Fighter stone cold dead on the ground.

* * * * * *

This was in an evil campaign. Myself, as a Necromancer, and another player decided to take advantage of my Necromantic abilities. Namely the raising of the dead, which we could then use as cannon fodder. Use them to set off traps, help us fight monsters, etc. Great idea, right? But did we go to a cemetary and just raise some corpses? NOOOOOOO. That would've required some actual thought processes on our part. And besides, we were evil and wanted to hurt people in the process, so we instead decided to find the nearest pack of hobos and murder them, then raise them as zombies.

So we travel through the seedier parts of town til at last we find a pack of hobos. Specifically a family of homeless. Sweet! We'd get the chance to murder an entire family! So we leapt to the attack, expecting a slaughter.

Oh, there was a slaughter, alright! Just not what we were expecting.

The homeless family turned out to be a family of friggin' wererats! And we, being 1st-level characters, didn't have +1 or better weapons. We tried desperately to escape, but no such luck. Suffice to say, that family of homeless wererats went to bed that night with full stomachs...
 

Here is an old pic I did of cilophin vs. the girralon from the first post...
 

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Ok, dumbest thing my Charecter's have done while IN charecter. Grey Elven Wizard, doesn't know common that well. Hasn't been outside of his Home City until 2 weeks ago (for the current adventure). The rogue opens a door, and to his surprise finds 4 gnolls and a evil cultist. The rogue wearing a robe of the cult, shouts "Help! I am being chased!" and thinks he passes his bluff check. My charecter, from behind shouts "Hey. Who is it that you speak to! I am back here!"

DM: Roll initiative.

No deaths, but its still early in this charecters career. I guess thats what happens with a low wisdom, new adventurer :)
 

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