Comfort withcross gender characters based on your gender

[Eltab]

"I couldn't find a dwarf bard mini."

I want a male half-elf wearing chainmail wielding a whip (my Tiamat campaign Ancients Paladin doing 'steer the crowd away from us') who does not look like a priestess of Loviatar.

 

[Riley37]

One more time for the slow of reading. SO LONG AS THE PEOPLE AT YOUR TABLE RECOGNIZE THE SALIENT FEATURES OF YOUR CHARACTER I AM HAPPY. How you achieve that is totally up to you.

Fair enough. Thanks. No further objections.

 

[ExploderWizard]

I use a miniature.

DM: "What's your race?"
Me: "Look at the mini."
"What's your gender?"
"Look at the mini."
"Hair color?"
"Mini."
"Weapon?"
"Mini!"
"Armor?"
"MINI!"
"Class, let's see... fighter."
"Nope, bard."
"But you're wearing full plate?!?"
"I couldn't find a dwarf bard mini."

Here you go!

https://www.stonehavenmini.com/products/SH0009

 

[Lanefan]

I want a male half-elf wearing chainmail wielding a whip (my Tiamat campaign Ancients Paladin doing 'steer the crowd away from us') who does not look like a priestess of Loviatar.

And with the wonders of modern tech you can have it: there's various places now that'll take your specs, whatever they may be, and based on those they'll 3D-print you a mini.

You're still on your own hook for painting it, however.

 

[billd91]

One more time for the slow of reading. SO LONG AS THE PEOPLE AT YOUR TABLE RECOGNIZE THE SALIENT FEATURES OF YOUR CHARACTER I AM HAPPY. How you achieve that is totally up to you. Heck, something as simple as actually using a female miniature at the table would be good enough. ((Granted I always play on virtual tabletop, so such a thing is pretty bloody easy to achieve))

And the salient features of the character are what now? Are we in agreement what they are? Are you in agreement with the rest of your table (of virtual table)? Are they what I, as the player of the player character, choose to make prominent in my portrayal or are they imposed externally by you?

 

[ccs]

I use a miniature.

DM: "What's your race?"
Me: "Look at the mini."
"What's your gender?"
"Look at the mini."
"Hair color?"
"Mini."
"Weapon?"
"Mini!"
"Armor?"
"MINI!"
"Class, let's see... fighter."
"Nope, bard."
"But you're wearing full plate?!?"
"I couldn't find a dwarf bard mini."

Sounds like you need https://www.heroforge.com/ !
No more excuses!

 

[aramis erak]

I am male.
I am slightly uncomfortable with cross gender characters played by others.
I am more uncomfortable with playing them myself.
Neither enough to rule them out.

As a GM, i don't limit gender provided
(1) when I'm running a game with a setting with gender roles, and social effects of breaking them, players accept and play accordingly.
(2) when I say fade to black, it's not pushed by the player past that point.
(3) one isn't making a parody of it.

 

[Sunseeker]

I'm going to foolishly wade into this thread once more and see if perhaps, I can be more clear.

I come to the table with a character (we have, at this point, reached Hussar's "cypher" point). Through simple introduction, I explain the character is an elf, and female.

NOW! I have established that my character is not myself (a male human), from this point forward, the presentation of this elf female is largely in my hands. If I am playing a fairly culturally-normative elf female, then per @MechaPilot this character should uphold certain established cultural norms and values. I may need some assistance from the GM from time to time since me, the IRL male human, wouldn't know the ins and outs of the elf society I come from, or how women are treated and behave in that society.

BUT! It is highly common for adventurers to be exceptions rather than norms. Perhaps I have a particularly stronk elf, who is a bit of a pyro that likes getting drunk and generally being loud. Most people, regardless of the particulars of any homebrew elf-culture, would compare that to traditional elf cultures (such as portrayed in Tolkein) and agree that's not normative. In fact, that's probably not even normative for IRL human female culture (though it's certainly more possible now than it was before). But more to the point, being strong, enjoying lighting things on fire, getting drunk and being loud are not elements that most people would immediately identify as female.

So this is where I come back to question [MENTION=22779]Hussar[/MENTION]: We know that adventures are a mixed bunch. How does one properly portray that their character is female, when their player is not, without ascribing traditional gender-binary hetero-normative elements to them? Or, in the context of the elf described above, is it your assertion that I shouldn't be playing a female character if they have no traditional gender-binary hetero-normative elements?

Or, is it simply enough that I have stated my character is an elf, and female? Because from before, I thought I asked that, and your response seemed to me(and I may have misunderstood) that this was unsatisfactory?

 

[pming]

Hiya.

Male here. Indifferent; I really don't care one way or the other. I almost chose "Comfortable", but...well, I seriously just do not care enough one way or the other. I figure if someone can pretend to play a ultra-wise 225 year old dwarven cleric who worships the dwarven god of metalworking as he casts spells and battles creatures of nightmare 12 kilometers under the surface of the land....saying "Oh, I'm a chick" is pretty far down on the list of things that I have to "imagine".

^_^

Paul L. Ming

 

[Riley37]

I figure if someone can pretend to play a ultra-wise 225 year old dwarven cleric who worships the dwarven god of metalworking as he casts spells and battles creatures of nightmare 12 kilometers under the surface of the land....saying "Oh, I'm a chick" is pretty far down on the list of things that I have to "imagine".

Where by "imagine" you mean "suspend disbelief"? This might be the first time I agree with you on EN World, and it might be the last - so, while the moment lasts, thank you!