COPS & ROBBERS

An hour or two quickly goes past and the first guests of the ceremony start to arrive.  The other seven guildmasters are the first on the scene and they gather around in one group, probably discussing some Guild issues and the running of the Union of Free Cities.  As the other guests arrive, guildmembers and ambassadors from neighbouring lands, the guildmasters scatter. 

One, the youngest one, the one named Qter,  walks over to the players.  He is tall but slender, in his late thirties but one might’ve thought he was even younger.  He’s sporting shoulder long black hair and a small, very tidy and well groomed beard.  He wears a dark blue silk suit and a fine silver-embroidered black cape.  He smiles a wide smile and raises his wineglass at the players.  “Ah, you are Carp’s boys aren’t you, yes?”

The players can’t do anything but agree.

“The orc... you were the one to jump aboard Grunt’s own ship, am I right?”

“Erm.. yeah.”  Kurk looks suspiciously at Qter.  “Why?”

“Oh, just curious, I heard about that.”

Kurk smirks slightly.  “Yeah, dat was good.”

Qter empties his wineglass into his mouth and then carefully examines it for a moment.  He then looks at the players and says: “I’m going to  get me some more wine, would you care for some?”  The players accept and he goes to find the nearest waiter.

Just about then the priests who will see to the ceremony start to enter the hall.  At first some lowly disciplines start carrying in big drums and then following them come some lower priests all clad in rather plain black robes.  Last in is the bishop of Serpent City himself clad in the traditional white bishop robes.  He’s covered in jewellery and all kinds of holy symbols. Following him are two higher priests, clad in plain black and white robes.  They sit down in their designed seats on the stage and seem to be discussing something amongst themselves.

Incognito feels that something is not right about the guildmaster’s curiosity and asks him as he returns with their glasses:  “What do you care about some small fish like us?”

“What, I’m not allowed to pay any interest  to my subjects?”

“Of course, but it’s a bit... unusual.”

“Hmm.”  Qter sips on his drink.  “Indeed.  You are right of course.”  He point in the direction of a couple of the other guildmasters. ”None of them cares about the wellfare of the Union.  All they care about is the weight of their money pouch.”  He frowns in disgust.  “The diplomatic tension between us and the Dracani Dynasty has never been as strong as now.  If we don’t do something quick to smoothen things out it might result in war.”  Qter seems to have become quite heated while preaching  this.  “And as you know, the Union has no real army to speak of, if it comes to war we are destined to loose!”

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

As Qter releases the last word, Ztorialim enters the hall.  He has a long grey beard running down his chest and thick dark eyebrows.  He’s nearly completely bald.  He’s wearing a dark red ceremonial robe embroidered with golden and black threads.  As he walks through the hall, everybody fall silent and look in the direction of the golden stage, formerly the place of the former king’s throne. 

Picture of Ztorialim
ztorialim.jpg


Ztorialim slowly walks up the golden steps as the bishop starts mumbling something in ancient Kentaari.  The priest disciplines start hitting the drums:  BAM-BUM-BAM-BUM-BAM-BUM.  As Ztorialim reaches the highest step and halts, the lesser priests start echoing the mumbling of the bishop.  Ztorialim goes down on his knees and touches his forehead lightly.  Immediately the disciplines stop hitting the drums.  The bishop steps forward and Ztorialim looks up at him and says, loud and clearly:  “I wish to serve.”

The bishop nods and places his hand on Ztorialim’s bald head:  “So you do, but are you ready?”

“I am ready.  I stand before God and promise, I am ready.  I swear to the old ones, I am ready.  I vow to the Guild and their subjects, I am ready.”  It’s quite clear from Ztorialim’s voice that the whole scene has been rehearsed countless times.

“So be it.”  The bishop nods again turns to one of the disciplines who hands him a bowl of holy water.  The bishop dips his hand into the water and again lays his hand on Ztorialim’s head.  “Then stand up and declare your vows to the world.”

Slowly, Ztorialim stands up and turns to the crowd behind him:  “I vow to you, the people of the Free Cities, I am ready.  I am ready to rule wisely, to rule by the wishes of the people, not my own.  I am ready to follow the teachings of God and his messengers.  I am ready to stand against evil and corruption in all forms they might come, and ready to uphold truth and justice.  I vow to serve the people until my days on earth are over.  I am ready if you see so fit to honour me.”

The bishop walks to Ztorialim’s right side and asks the audience:  “Is there anyone here who objects to his crowning as a Guildmaster?  If so, speak now or forever hold their peace.”

The great hall is silent.  Someone coughs in the distance.  Stickler turns to Incognito and asks:  “We might have been wrong.”  Incognito nods in agreement.  The bishop again starts to speak:  “Very well, bring me the crown.”  One of the disciplines walks over to the bishop, the small ceremonial silver crown lies on a small pillow in his hands.  As the bishop prepares to pick it up, an angry voice calls from the balcony: “ I object!  I object to the idea of the holy lands of man being ruled by witches, I object to the corruption that this city is drowning in and I object to that the people of the realm close their eyes and act like they see nothing.  It’s time for them to see, to understand!”  There on the balcony stands Gerald the Witchhunter in all his glory, clad in tattered leather armour, which is covered in various holy symbols and trinkets, and sporting a large crossbow in his hands and a old rusty longsword strapped to his back.

Picture of Gerald the Witchhunter
gerald.jpg


The many capes guarding the hall start running to the stairs that lead to the balcony, weapons drawn.  Ztorialim just looks at Gerald in a queer way, says:  “Sorry about all that, I’ll try to do something about all that once I’ve been sworn into office.”, and signals the bishop to keep going.  Gerald goes nuts and screams at Ztorialim: “You frickin’ witch!”  He fires a bolt at the Guildmaster-to-be: “Try to do something about that!”  The crowd gasps in terror and excitement, everybody except Ztorialim who remains calm.  The crossbow bolt, which was heading straight at him, burns up in a white flash just a meter from his chest.  Ztorialim just starts laughing: “You fool, didn’t you think a great scary witch like me comes here without any means of magical protection?!”


Gerald lets out a cry of pure fury and hastily tries to reload the crossbow.  The first wave of capes come storming over him, two guards, one grabs him from behind while the other grabs his crossbow.  Gerald tries to wrestle from the grasp of the guy holding him and kicks the other one in the face, who falls backwards down to the floor.  Then, he swings the one trying to hold him over his shoulder and down from the balcony, down to the crowd below.  He grabs his old rusty sword and chops the head of the other cape while he’s trying to stand up.  The other capes, including the players, are closing on him so he throws away the sword and jumps out a nearby mosaic window, which shatters into thousand bits, and down onto the roof one level down.  After a second or two of rest he jumps up on his feet and starts running.  The players jump after him out the broken window, onto the roof and start chasing.
 
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|------|>  MUSIC = “Smack my bitch up” by Prodigy  <|------|

Incognito doesn’t enjoy these kinda chases.  “STOP, YOU ARE UNDER ARREST!”  He gets no reply from Gerald, who is reloading his crossbow while he runs.  “I SAID STOP!!”

Even though the palace is big, Gerald soon runs out of roof to run after.  He jumps down off the roof, spins around in the air and fires a bolt from his crossbow  at the players which hits Incognito in the shoulder.  Incognito falls back on his back in a groan of pain.  Gerald lands on a balcony two floors down and quickly swings himself off it down onto the roof below (yep, more roof, see the map of the palace roof).  Kurk and Stickler jump after him and Icognito stands up and starts running to the edge of the roof.  Stickler lands safely on the balcony but Kurk seems to have miscalculated a little and misses, he falls down but Incognito (who has reached the edge) casts Levitate on him and levitates him back up on the roof.  Stickler swings himself down off the balcony and onto the roof below and immediately starts running after Gerald who has reached the end of this roof and prepares to jump to the next one. 

When Kurk gets back onto the roof above he grunts nastily as Incognito pokes fun at him: “Heh, you’re gonna make a habit of this aren’t you?”  Kurk frowns and answers in a grumpy voice:  “Ya nitwit, ya should’ve levitated me down, not up, so I could keep on chasing da bastard!”

Gerald jumps over to the next roof with Stickler closely on his trail.  Stickler is able to grab on to one of the holy trinkets on Gerald’s armour, but Gerald jumps into the air, disbalancing Stickler who falls down onto his face.  Gerald keeps running but finds out that the distance to the next roof is too great to jump over.  He looks over the edge but there he sees Sergeant Carp and a large group of capes coming around the corner.  He’s stuck, Carp and the capes down below and Stickler (who’s standing up, wiping his broken nose) blocking his other way away (with Kurk and Incognito gaining on them).

|---------------|> END MUSIC <|-----------------|

Stickler sees the worried expression on Gerald’s face:  “Give up Gerald, there’s no way out of this.”

Gerald grabs for a bolt to reload his crossbow but he finds that he has lost his crossbow bolts on the run. He looks down again and moves closer to the edge:  “Don’t come closer you pig, I’m warning you.”

“What are you gonna do? Jump? Be my guest.”  Incognito and Kurk have now reached them and Kurk swings his axe around threatingly.

“Screw you!”  Gerald’s expression changes from terror to anger.  “Why can’t you all understand?!  He’s a witch fergawdsake, he’s evil!  He’s got you all under his spell, he and his demonic kin!”  Gerald looks down again, hesitates for a second and then just casually jumps down.  He lands on the street below with a big thump. 

Sergeant Carp runs over to the body.  “Eww!” He says as he steps in the pool of blood that’s starting to surround the body.  He bends down, checks for pulse and then shakes his head slowly.  “He’s dead.”  He looks up to the roof at the players and says loudly:  “Good work guys.  Now come down and help in cleaning this mess up.”

Guildmaster Qter, who just entered the scene, objects:  “On the contrary sergeant, if anything, our heroes should be rewarded, not to be forced into such activities.”  He raises his glass.  “I salute you, the very pride of Serpent City.”

A couple of the other guests join the salution as well as the rest of the capes raise their weapons into the air.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

They finish the ceremony  and Ztorialim is crowned into office.  The players are sent to the healers, where they spend the night.
 




Act 5 – The Bank Robbery

Tholin was just a plain little born and bred city gnome. He didn’t really like the city that much though, in his dreams he lives in the country. In a little cottage somewhere on the edge of Forkwood. He really liked the country, peaceful and quiet, fresh air and nothing but friendly neighbours (and if they weren’t that friendly, they at least probably lived some distance away). It’s not like that in the city. It’s loud and people are rude and everything smells of mud and thunderstone smoke. Bah!

The first thing Tholin would do when he would raise enough money to move away would to be to give mister Lipschulzt, his boss, the finger. He hated his job as a cashier, people are always rude to him and he’s surrounded by nothing but limitless greed all day long and he really, really hates his job when stupid gun wielding orcs storm in and demand the combination to the safe. This was the third time this year.

“Give me da numbers to open da safe ya gnome vermin!! This is yer last chance!”

“I already told you, I don’t have ‘em! Only Mr. Lipschulzt has access to the safe.”

The orc growls in annoyance and looks at Tholin as if he’s wondering whether or not to blow his head off. He seems to decide against it as he says: “Pah, gnome insect!” and then calls to his gang partners: “Get da thundersticks! We’re gonna have to blow da door up!”

Just then a loud explosion goes off somewhere outside over the bank. The chief orc seems a bit worried and yells again over to his partners: “Argh, that would be da bank’s flare, da capes will be here in no time. Hurry!!”


* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

One of the City Guard’s watchers saw the flare from the Golden Ox bank and some capes are sent to help. The players and two others.

A small crowd is gathering around the front of the bank but when one of the robbers shoots a couple of rounds from his shotgun though the main entrance the crowd suddenly scatters. Kurk waves his axe around to discourage anyone who’d try to return.

Stickler sneaks silently to the door and quickly looks through the big hole the shotgun blast left behind. He counts eight orc thugs, two armed with shotguns, one with a rifle and the remaining five just with ordinary pistols. One is holding the cashier, a small tidy well dressed city gnome, down with his foot and points his pistol at him. He’s ordering some of the other orcs around, he seems to be the leader. Behind the cashier’s desk there is a big round thick steel door, about 2 ½ metres in diameter. It’s probably the door to the safe. Two of the orcs seem to be doing somethingto the big door, but Stickler can’t see what. They are probably trying to open it.

Suddenly one of the shotgun carrying orcs notice Stickler. “Argh, the capes are here!!” He shoots at Stickler and Stickler just barely jumps away from the door as a new big hole is formed in it. He runs into cover to the other capes.
 

The capes arm themselves, Incognito and Stickler with two pistols each while Kurk and the other two capes are all armed with shotguns.

They burst through the doors, guns blazing and start shooting and Stickler hits and kills one of the shotgun orcs.
Just then, the safe blows up in a light blue thunderstone explosion and the safe’s heavy steel door comes flying in the direction of the capes. First it literally knocks one of the orcs’ head off his shoulders and sends it flying to the far corner of the room, then it crushes the cashiers desk and now heads directly in the direction of Kurk, Stickler and one of the extra capes. Stickler just barely is able to jump out of danger but Kurk and the extra get the door’s full weight upon themselves. The door takes them with it through the wall and out onto the street. When it finally stops, landing harshly on Kurk and the extra. Kurk falls unconscious and the extra is crushed to his death.

After a minute or two of confusion after the blast, the orc leader grabs the cashier by the neck and point his gun at his head, screaming: ”Try something and da gnome gets it!!” When he’s sure the three remaining capes aren’t gonna do anything drastic, he commands the other orcs: “Go into da safe and empty it!”

The thugs start emptying the safe, carrying chests full of coins and gold bars onto a carriage who just appeared outside. Without looking away from the capes, the chief thug asks a orc who’s carrying a large heavy chest: “Did ya find the gem? Grunt needs da gem!”

The orc grins and nods.

“Good.” The orc chief says approvingly. “Otherwise, Grunt will not be happy.”

The orcs finish loading the loot onto the cart and signal their leader to get the heck the out of there. The leader quickly shoots the other extra cape into the chest, killing him and throws the cashier at Incognito before he got a chance to shoot, knocking him off his feet and onto his back. The leader runs for the doors, out to the carts, but Stickler shoots him in the back, killing him.

Incognito throws the gnome off him and jumps onto his feet. Then Incognito and Stickler run out the door after the other robbers. The thugs don’t wait to chat and blast away as fast as the horses can drag them. Incognito quickly grabs Kurk’s shotgun that is lying on the ground and shoots one of the wheels under the carriage. The wooden wheel splinters into hundred bits and the carriage goes out of control, breaks away from the horses that are pulling it and it crushes into nearby wall. The orcs seem unharmed, dazed but not seriously hurt.

Incognito and Stickler try to lift the heavy steel door off Kurk but it’s too heavy for them so they reload their weapons and advance to the bankrobbers. The thugs jump off the carriage and prepare to defend themselves.

One of the orcs screams out to his comrades: “Crap, where’s the gem?! Grunt needs the gem!” Then he notices the big emerald lying on the street and quickly grabs it. He runs away as fast as he can.

Now, the four orcs and two capes stand in the middle of the street, facing each other, guns blazing. Incognito says, “Give up scum.”

The orcs laugh. “Yeah right.”

The firefight starts. Stickler and Incognito are quicker and immedietly shoot two thugs. The remaining two both fire at Incognito and one hits him in the leg but the other misses. Incognito falls to the ground in agonizing pain, but Stickler quickly revenges his friend, shooting the orc.

The one last orc sees that he’s not on the winning team here and throws away his gun and runs away. Stickler shoots him in the foot before he’s ten metres away. The orc howls in agony and falls straight onto his face into the mud.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Just about then more capes arrive, a bit too late. The players are once again sent to the healers and spend the next two or three weeks there, except for Stickler, who is out the next day. He and Sergeant Carp discuss this seriously as it’s evident that Grunt planned it. They wonder why that gem could possibly mean so much to him and curse over the fact that one of the orcs got away with it.
 

Hey, good story!

I has begun reading it in the old forum, but after a while I lost it.

Now I think it will be another of the (too big) handful of stories I read everymorning...
 

OK, I'll admit it's taken me a while to get to this story hour. But this is good stuff MM! I really like the world feel you've got, part steam punk, part Anhk-Morpork.

More please.
 

Horacio said:
Hey, good story!

I has begun reading it in the old forum, but after a while I lost it.

Now I think it will be another of the (too big) handful of stories I read everymorning...
Wow, thanks mate.

KidCthulhu said:
OK, I'll admit it's taken me a while to get to this story hour. But this is good stuff MM!
Again, thanks.
I really like the world feel you've got, part steam punk, part Anhk-Morpork.
Ankh Morork eh? hadn't really considered that, but now when you say it I think you're right. I'm a big Terry Prachett fan so it isn't strange that it inspires my worldmaking (consciously or not).
More please.
Coming up.
 

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