D&D General D&D Evolutions You Like and Dislike [+]

[Lanefan]

I think a lot of us are coming at this from two very different angles.

It seems like for a fair amount of people on this thread, the game comes first. You decide to start a game, and you look for a group of interested people to play with. Your games might last a while, and it's understood that some people will join, and others will leave.

This is me all the way.

However.....

For myself (and it sounds like @Remathilis and a few other people in this thread), the group of friends is the center of the activity.

My players are also my friends. I don't generally run for strangers other than extremely rare* convention games.

Players can come and go in my game and still remain friends. Also, in theory (though not as much in practice as I'd like) we all see each other outside the game - it's not like the game is our only point of contact - meaning that when we get together on game night the focus is the game we're there for.

I don't think the two angles you speak of are as disparate as you're makign them otu to be.

* - as in, twice in my life so far.

 

[Lanefan]

I literally said I had a player who told me she has a concern with animal and child abuse in.game and @Lanefan suggested that I should have told her "we all want child abuse in our game, go play something else." How else am I supposed to take that?

The way you described it, it seems this player was new to your game but already actively playing when these concerns came up. If I misread that, apologies.

My point is if I've read it right and this was in fact the case, it shouldn't have ever got to that point. Something went adrift in the process of describing the game being run before inviting that player in, leading to what sounds like an uncomfortable situation later.

 

[GrimCo]

Players can come and go in my game and still remain friends. Also, in theory (though not as much in practice as I'd like) we all see each other outside the game - it's not like the game is our only point of contact - meaning that when we get together on game night the focus is the game we're there for.

Same here. We are friend group first, gaming group second. One of the guys will soon become dad again, so he won't be playing with us for at least until end of the year since committing 3-4 hours during the weekend is big ask. Maybe he'll drop in for session here and there. But he is still friend. We might still grab quick coffe, see each other when we have family barbecue or on kids birthdays, our birthdays etc when all of us get together with significant others and our kids and hang out.

I have also another group, who are also friends, but due to scheduling, i had to stop playing with them. Still see them, we grab a drink, go to concert etc. I just don't play with them.