D&D games and distractions

[DM_Jeff]

What I’m asking for is general advice or fellow gripers to sound off, so I know I’m not alone. Also accepting “stinks to be you” messages as well.

Anyone’s D&D games suffer from distractions? If so, what kind and how do you deal with them?

I’ve been playing D&D for 24 years, and have slowly refined my games to avoid most obvious ones. A dedicated game room, no TV, no cell phones, predetermined restroom and snack breaks, and the like. I don’t even answer our home phone anymore during games.

On the other hand, I seem to be completely powerless to prevent distractions from kids. Usually not my own, but they contribute too. We play a fairly adult-themed game, and so I run a separate game for my kids twice a month. But we have more than a share of couples that game with us who have no place to drop their kids, and so there’s always a minimum of 4-6 kids running around the house, aged 3 to 11 when we game. With all parents playing, there’s no one left to entertain them, so we let them entertain themselves. We have a dedicated kids room with most amenities kids could want, except adult attention, which they could care less about most of the time until it comes time to game. We’ve discussed all pitching in to hire a babysitter, but the prices are pretty horrible. What happens is the game stops 2-3 times an hour to tend the kids, sometimes more, and it hurts the flow and the attention span of the players.

As a result, the game takes on a lighter, non-gritty tone. “The half-orc deceiver grabs the hostage, and whips out a knife…” “Mommy, I have to go to the potty!” Luckily I run another game with no kids in attendance, and it’s a whole different ballgame. Any thoughts or idears?

-DM Jeff

 

[Henry]

My best advice? If you collectively aren't willing to spring for the Sitter, then
talk with the parents in your group, and designate a rotating Baby Sitter from the ranks of the parents. When they game, either their PC sits out of the current session, or is run as an NPC.

If the non-parents are willing to pitch in, then you have an even wider pool. Whoever DM's the game will be, of course, exempt, because his prep time for making the game and running the session is his compensation. When another person DM's, then The former DM is in the rotating pool too (assuming the non-parents volunteer).

My personal opinion (others' may vary) is that, as adults, if someone is wanting to make the time to game, they should be also able to make preparations for their children. A rotating sitter is a compromise between "cheap sitter" and "not getting uninterrupted game time because of children that want attention."

 

[kengar]

Kids can be a real problem in games. My wife & I tried playing in a campaign and brought our baby daughter with us. The DM & his wife (also playing) had 2 daughters, age 4 & 12. The result was a lot of distraction. In the end, my wife & I bowed out of the game due to work issues, but the game itself suffered a fair bit from distraction by kids as well.

The best solution is a sitter, of course. If there are any kids among the families playing that are old enough, maybe they'd be interested in watching the littleuns during the session.

 

[Calico_Jack73]

I'd go with the sitter solution. However, the "Gaming Parent" idea might work but honestly, I would NOT ask one of your non-parent gamers to watch the kids... the children are not their responsibility. If they offer that is one thing but I personally would be offended if someone asked me to sit out a game so I could watch their kid while they play. If you are a member of a church I'd check there for cheap sitters. I know that my church has a list of volunteers to babysit who charge very reasonable rates. If you are lucky the church may even have a "Parents Night Out" night where they watch the children at the Church which would be even better.

 

[MerakSpielman]

Rotating babysitters recruited from the ranks of the parent players seems like the best option.

It's not fair for the non-parent players to have their fun held up because of the others' kids.

 

[Arnwyn]

The parents (and only the parents) must spring for a babysitter. It's the only way you'll game distraction-free.

Otherwise, well... "stinks to be you".

 

[Bendris Noulg]

On top of having 3 kids (1 being Special Needs), I've had to move 5 times in the last 3 years because I tend to take contract work (combined with the economy, this results in short-term contracts as opposed to long-term contracts). Coming up, at the end of this month, my commitments in Florida will be complete, so I'm looking to relocate again. Of course, I don't have a new contract yet, so if/when/how that will happen is still up in the air.

Obviously, this results in more than a few screw-ball situations involving gaming. Particularly since, by the time I find 2-3 players of any worth to join the game, it's time to move again.

Very frustrating.

I think I'll have to resign myself to the fact that I'll likely be a part-time gamer for the next couple of years.

(BTW: Anyone know of any AutoCAD/Database openings in the more northerly regions of the US. Someplace like Alaska, Washington, Michigan, Maine, etc.?)

 

[Calico_Jack73]

(BTW: Anyone know of any AutoCAD/Database openings in the more northerly regions of the US. Someplace like Alaska, Washington, Michigan, Maine, etc.?)

Is Northern Virginia north enough for you? There are a TON of jobs that would suit you with goverment contractors in the Washington DC area. Not to toot my own company's horn but Lockheed Martin has been hiring quite a few DBAs and probably won't be letting up anytime soon. Your best bet is to hit one of the "Tech Expo" job fairs. Even if they say that they only want people with security clearances don't you pay attention. They'll get you the clearance if you are hired.

 

[Cor Azer]

Wow... My group went through almost the same thing a few months ago. I (the DM) don't have kids myself, but several parents were among the players, and as luck would have it at the time, the only convenient place to play was at the home of one set of parents. I agree it can be a major distraction.

In our case, my fiancee and I moved into a new and bigger apartment, so we now game there kid-free. The parents of the kids either hire a babysitter, or rotate the duties themselves. One suggested that the roommate (another player) of one of the parents should take a hand in the rotating babysitting duties, but his reply was, and I quote:

"HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
No."

His reasoning - as much as he enjoys gaming with the parents, it's not his responsibility to look after the kids.

 

[Vindicator]

How do you meet "mature" gamers?

Edit: Urp...posted the wrong message here. Please continue thread as usual.