D&D5e (2014) Out of the Abyss

Harpers Session 4

Having been sucked through a portal to the Abyss, our heroes are unceremoniously deposited in a desolate wasteland of grey ash. Intermittent geysers of molten rock erupt from dark cracks in the barren ground. A half dozen bandits were also pulled through the portal, dazed and disorientated by the alien hellscape. Karnock the Legend is nowhere to be seen, perhaps being temporarily diverted to some other plane of existence. A pair of passing Glabrezu demons spot the new arrivals and wander over to greet us. Sorry, EAT us.

Without Karnock to dish out the big damage, taking out the demons is a debacle. Fortunately, one of the Glabrezu is occupied with the bandits, so we only have to worry about the other one. Lia takes it out with what will quickly become her signature move; running up to a group of enemies and casting Fireball on herself to immolate everything in a 20ft radius. She emerges from the smoking crater with a wide grin and a thumbs up to the rest of the party. We slip off quietly while the other demon splashes around happily in a puddle of bandit entrails.

We take shelter in a cave. Only Fapp can see in the dark, so he is sent to scout things out. It seems safe enough, although the cave does continue on for some distance. We make camp for the night. In the morning, Lia can commune with her goddess to seek guidance, re: getting out of this dogshit dimension. Being a halfling, Robin is (always) hungry, and nobody else is getting any rest while he is bellyaching about his belly aching. Grumbling, Fapp heads deeper into the cave to hunt bats and/or cave lizards to feed the party.

Hundreds of eyeless albino bats dangle from the roof of the cave. The colony seem skittish, indicating the presence of a predator. A baleful red eye opens on the surface of a stalagmite and writhing tentacles whip out to grapple the feckless elf.

"Aggghhhh!!!" Fapp cries, "I'm being attacked by some kind of hentai-monster!"

Fapp's screams echo throughout the cave, disturbing the bats and sending them into a frenzy. A particularly large bat hits Harper d'Ajent in the face. Robin pounces on the stunned animal and starts eating it raw. Somewhat nauseated, Harper and Lia go looking for Fapp. They turn up just in time to watch him get eaten by the Roper. Harper dashes forward, reaches into the monster's mouth and casts Dimension Door to teleport himself and Fapp's mangled body back to camp.

The rest of the night passes uneventfully. With a nice full tummy, Robin sleeps like a baby. As whatever passes for a sun rises over the Abyss (I'm pictuing a screaming face that orbits the plane), Lia communes with Selune.




"Blessed Moonmaiden," Lia prays, "How do we return to the material plane?"

'Heed my words, child of silver. You must gather 6 crystals -"

"Oh, we're doing the 6 crystals thing. That's cool. Hey guys, we're doing the 6 crystals thing to get outta here."

"I still have some crystals left over from the last time."
Fapp offers, producing a handful of gleaming stones from his pack.

Sadly, those crystals don't count. Selune puts a quest maker on our map and we set off for the first challenge. We meet a fancy-looking gentlman sitting on a rock. Harper pauses to compliment the stranger on his impeccable fashion sense. The fancy gent transforms into a hulking gorilla demon and punches Harper in the face. Two more Barlgura demons jump out from behind the rock, and a horde of Dretches rise up from the ashen ground to surround us.

Harper casts Hypnotic Pattern. The Barlgura demons are transfixed. Lia brandishes her Wand of Fireballs and runs toward the nearest cluster of Dretches. The rest of the party scramble to get out of her way. We survive the ambush and defeat our adversaries. As the last demon falls, a quest crystal appears. One down, five more to go!

TBC
 

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Harpers Session 5

A sudden flurry of black feathers and Karnok the Legend re-appears, gripping a squirming mephit in one clenched fist. He is accompanied by a strong/silent human man wearing a cowboy hat and dusty poncho. This is Sundown Shane Anderson. He tips his hat to the party.
"Howdy."
"I found us a Ranger!"
Karnok announces.
"We already have a Ranger!" Fapp protests (pause to register expressions of confusion across the party), "Me!"




Hoping the mephit will lead us to the next waypoint, Lia commands the elemental to "sniff [my] crystal!" Shane deftly ties a lease for the creature, then hands the rope to Fapp, like the world's shittest balloon animal.
"Hold that for me, would ya' champ?"
Fapp seethes. The mephit slips its collar and flies away. Fapp blames Shane's sloppy knot, but the rest of the party shake their heads and refuse to meet his eye.

Karnok detects the intoxicating scent of fermented grains drifting from the entrance to the Screaming Maw tavern. The door is unpleasantly slimy, and the entire building appears to be alive. Ignoring this, the party head inside. A winged cambion tends bar, whilst an assortment of abyssal denizens nurse strong drinks; two Barlgura demons, four Hezrou demons and a half dozen flayed wizards. A band of terrified musicians shackled to the stage play lively honky tonk beats like their lives depend on it.




Harper joins the band. Robin wolfs down a plate of Nalfeshnee bangers and is immediately sick. Projectile vomit everywhere. The bartender tells us to get out. Adhesive tentacles reach from the walls of the living tavern to grapple the two Rangers, pulling them both inexorably closer to a gaping maw that has opened in the floor of the taproom.

"Not again!" Fapp wails.

Shane just grunts in a cool and manly fashion, stoic in the face of imminent peril.

Robin hides inside a drum and rolls out through the open door. Lia casts Fireball, but is counter-spelled by the flayed wizards. Karnok grapples the bartender and pins him to the wall whilst gulping down a pint of Blackflap. Fapp breaks free of the grasping tentacles and briefly considers helping Shane, before deciding to leave the newcomer to his fate. This Abyss isn't big enough for the both of them. Shane hardly needs the help, he breaks free on his own one round later. The flayed wizards hit the party with a Fireball of their own, then Dimension Door 500ft away. Harper goes down. Shane takes aim at the retreating wizards, rolls to hit (nat 1 on the dice) and shoots Fapp in the kneecap. An explosion rocks the tavern. Lia emerges brandishing her smoking wand. The interior is ablaze.

Time to go. It's safe to assume we are all barred from the Screaming Maw for life.

TBC
 

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