LA LA LANDslide!
Two murders, the destruction of 30% of a civic landmark, a bloody foot chase that ended up breaking asphalt, a public scandal, and dozens of traffic violations.
At the end of last session, the players were chased out of Los Angeles. Unfortunately, one of their persons of interest had just been murdered, so the group had to drive back. Laying low, they returned to their home away from home: the old Pasadena residence of former team member Maude Brown. Miss Brown had long ago sold the house to her groundskeeper, Herr Steiner, the Grandmaster of the Church of the Silver Cross. But they were extremely friendly for a cult, and made them welcome. The players were joined by their longtime buddy Zelda Saeki, who had been hired mostly because the group of investigators didn't have anyone good at ‘investigating’. She and Thaza O'Rourke snuck to the crime scene, where they slipped past the lone LAPD patrol officer and examined the area.
Whoever had done-in the victim had been able to hurl them through a glass window, at least 20 yards onto the grass below. Equally odd was the fact that all the footprints at the crime scene were barefoot. Thaza looked down at her feet, noticing that she was also barefoot.
The group was extremely well-connected, and decided to reach out to their sources to find out the political realities of Southern California.
The breakdown:
Mayor Stoner had gotten elected thanks to subliminal images in his latest movie, Seduction.
Nobody told him as an outsider he would be doing the whims of The Combination, which was police chief "Two Gun" Davis and his crooked cops, teaming up with the Bugsy Siegel outfit.
Meanwhile, the O’Rourkes wanted in on the action, with Thaza’s mentor Naomi making a play for the USS Rex, one of the gambling boats that skirted the law in SoCal, sending gangsters and fun-seekers on a joyful tour of International Waters. Thaza got an invite, causing friction when she didn't warn them that one of her pals was a private investigator with a camera in her hat. (Zelda, when discovered, was banished to the nickel poker table.)
Naomi had a surprise for her favorite gangster. As her foot soldiers gathered around the radio, they heard KTLA announce that Bugsy Siegel had been killed exiting the Pantry Diner in downtown LA, by a bearded wild man with a spear! What a crazy coincidence, that the enemies of the O’Rourkes kept dying to a mysterious serial killer who didn’t speak any English.
“Not the worst luck in the world,” suggested Rafe.
Thaza realized who Naomi sent. Back in
THE PAPER CHASE!, there was a wild man being brought into the family. Instead of freeing him, Thaza had convinced him that the criminal life was great. Oops.
This revelation split the group. Saeki and Lancaster wanted to apprehend the killer. Thaza, Lala and Gia, already under the suspicion of the LAPD, were more interested in getting past the roadblocks.
***
Downtown, Zelda and the millionaire followed the trail into Grand Central Market. Dozens of eateries, all under one roof, still busy at this time of night. The bare footprints led to the meat locker of a Jamaican stall.
***
Back west, Lala took her Chevy to the limit, hitting the redline as she reached downtown Santa Monica. The city's finest had numbers on their side though, and were keeping pace…
so Gia tried some psychology. She ordered the stuntwoman to drive more and more dangerously, seeing how the pursuers reacted. When she knew their appetite for risk, she explained her plan. They were going to drive the wrong way up the beach boardwalk.
***
Blood dripped out of the locker, nearly spilling on Rafe's Wels. Atsuko of the Apes was trapped, until he hurled a side of beef into the detective and scampered away. Rafe showed exceptional athleticism, chasing the killer across countertops as passerby gaped. Lancaster dropped back as the two reached the street, pulled out his pistol, and almost took the man out. The wild gangster responded by throwing his spear, which slashed Rafe’s arm and sent up shards of sidewalk!
***
Out on the coast, Lala slalomed between pedestrians and art stalls. Thaza pointed out an alley, and the stuntwoman parked instantly, killed the lights, and watched as patrol cars passed by unknowingly.
***
The next morning, breakfast was tense. Rafe, arm bandaged, demanded they find the killer. Gia, natural confidante, explained the situation. Thaza was a Ferrari, in control of what the mob wanted for her. Atsuko was more like a delivery truck that had been aimed at a brick wall.
“You're not being exploited. He is.”
It was raining hard when they got to their contact: the gorillas in Griffith Park Zoo. Thaza reasoned (correctly) that these were the only people Atsuko could’ve opened up to. The gorillas were helpful, telling New York's best cat burglar that her companion was "swinging on the big shapes”.
What they meant was, Atsuko was doing destructive gymnastics on the back of the Hollywoodland sign! Thaza growled and beat her chest, convincing the man that he needed to run away… Until the damaged N was struck by lightning! Lala dove and rescued the killer, before the L A N & D started careening down the muddy hillside!
Never willing to let a natural disaster go to waste, the players used this opportunity to fake Atsuko’s death!
***
That left only the political problems. It turned out that the mayor and Rafe Lancaster were both Marshall College men, so the group scored invites to a charity golfing event at Beverly Hills Country Club. Once there, they ran into a few obstacles: General Saeki, Cardinal Fuzz, and Chief Davis himself. But our quintet were skilled prevaricators, playing the ends against the middle. and once things were at a boiling point, they brought in their guest of honor: the new number one man in crime, Mickey Cohen. Thaza locked the Chief’s pistols together as Mickey strolled up to the mayor's table, greeted him sarcastically, and put his feet up.
***
The next day, the group was being honored at San Simeon. Hearst couldn't thank investigators enough. This drama was better than getting elected. It was going to sell enough papers to buy a second castle.
As he passed the crépe spade, he cut into the cake shaped like his latest front page. Did anyone want a piece of MAYOR MICKEY?