Golden Bee
The cool guy of online
Hello/Versailles!
Je suis le chasseur et tu es la proie.
In the world of pulp, there’s a direct correlation between the stakes and the level of competence. At least this week.
The session started with what was supposed to be a cakewalk. The group (secret MI-X agent Mary Willard, millionaire industrialist Rafe Lancaster, Appalachian honey "Cousin" Clara Tate, and Yugoslavia smuggler Ivan “Ivo” Kochev) were in a railcar diner in New Jersey. Some local tough guys, the Hot Rods, were threatening to beat up a former member. Mary read the situation: this was a distraction so one of the Rods could rip off the register.
That's when ‘planning’ went out the window. Rafe tried to use his money to intimidate the punks, but they made fun of him.
Mary stood by the door and… stood by the door. Clara tried to be close to the register, but went over to help Rafe, who went back to his booth and sulked. Clara’s attempts to physically intimidate the crooks was interpreted as flirting. The robbery was only foiled because Ivo made a scene and everyone but Rafe was kicked out.
***
After that showing, the group was nervous about their next assignment: Versailles! The 2300-room mansion was being rented out for a historical dress-up weekend, and they had been hired as chaperones for the Honorable Association of Girl Socialites. (Except for Clara: she was the oldest member of the HAGS.)
The group split up into different roles: Ivo was a natural philosopher, Rafe represented the aristocracy, Clara joined the Scottish mercenary guard, and sneaky Mary Willard disguised herself as a valet. She had a clandestine mission: find who at the retreat was secretly royalty, and protect them to prevent an international incident.
The many, many teenage girls in attendance were vying to be crowned the Sun Queen. Rafe was torn between supporting his niece Anizah ( related to him, but very annoying) and the much more genteel HAG, Polina Orlova. How to pick?
The group faffed about, investigating rivals and trying to make the event profitable. Ivo refused to stop two German smugglers from looting the hall of paintings, figuring that the mansion was big enough for everyone. Clara caught wind of this however, and pressed him into service catching the crooks before she got blamed.
Meanwhile, Mary tried to solve the mystery of the Jester. Whoever it was had assigned themselves their own role, and was wearing a full disguise. The Jester used their anonymity order to mock participants and engage in intense frivolity. Mary, in order to suck up to some of the well-heeled rich teens, started putting up wanted posters for the prankster.
Rafe, who had brought some of his European employees to the party, was all about schmoozing. He was at a cigar party when he noticed someone trying to hide from him. It was Mr. Dudley, a former client. And more importantly, Regent of Arthur, teenage Prince of Borgovia!
Arthur had infiltrated the event as the Jester in order to impress his on-again and off-again girlfriend Devika. (Unfortunately, she wasn't even in attendance, but was instead in Paris modeling for fashionista Bea Bingen.) The group had to cause a distraction so he could change disguises and leave the festivities, before he was scandalously discovered or kidnapped!
Meanwhile, the mean girls picked on poor Anizah, putting rats in her bed. Since the adults were too busy to do anything about it, the HAGS planned to drop rats on their rivals during dinner! Ivo had to tell some fabulous lies to clear the area, while Rafe disabled the trap. Since there was an actual risk, the group worked together and succeeded. (Pollina, who had previously been proclaimed the Czarina of Russia in exile, had mixed feelings about being crowned Sun Queen. Clara reassured her pal that she was perfect for the role, being a ballerina and everything.)
***
Mary was recalled to England, and the group decided to have a relaxing and free retreat in Inverness. (It was comped after the group last’s visit, which involved aliens, a disappearance ray, and strange gray giants out of Scottish folklore.)
There, they had thorough relaxation, and ran into their old acquaintance: Rose-of-Sharon Thisby. She buried them in local gossip; the eccentric visitors of Lord Bracknell of Eilean Donan; the rumor that Irish gangsters were looting castles in the Highlands; that royal scientists were coming up any day now, to find Nessie with the power of sonar.
The next morning, a messenger pigeon arrived. Lord Bracknell had heard of their mighty deeds and wanted to discuss a security job related to gangsters. The group rambled over, and despite the incoming storm and poorly maintained roads, arrived before nightfall.
The castle itself was gorgeous but weatherworn. It was on a peninsula between three lochs, imposing and austere.
Inside, the well-informed lord peppered the group with questions and tried to play down his eccentric reputation. He expounded upon his worldview: that the Earth is a joy for the strong. Hadn’t all three guests proved their skill at dispatching the weak? After dinner, he plied them with 300-year-old Scotch …That's the last thing they remembered.
The mad lord chained them up in the dungeon. Assuming they didn't drown in the rapidly pooling deluge, they had three hours after fleeing his property before he would give chase. Next to the trio were the dead bodies of two O'Rourke gangsters.
As soon as he left, Ivo called on his smuggler instincts, using shims of old bone to free himself. The others wanted to flee immediately, but he had been mentally mapping the castle.
The group clambered over wet stones, avoiding the patrols and the hounds. They fed the poisoned scotch to the latter, retrieved their weapons, and headed towards the front door.
Rafe had a better idea though. The best way to flee the castle was by boat. Especially if they unchained all the other boats and dragged them into the currents to prevent pursuit.
Repairing the complaining motor, the trio headed north. Certainly the neighboring town would be under the influence of the madman, but Rafe had an ace up his sleeve. Or more accurately, a Breitling watch.
The drenched adventurers found a nearby pub. Bursting in, Clara pointed her rifle at anyone who dared to move. None dared. Rafe won over the crowd of scared Scots like it was an investor pitch. By the time he was through, his watch was traded for the only car in the village, and they had let him use the phone to call his European branch. Ivo snuck the group back to their inn. He then snuck away himself, because sitting in the dining room room was Majá Malgorźo, of the League of Nations Police Force!
Because of Lancaster's extreme wealth and connections, she planned to petition the Scottish government for an inquiry. The lord had lost the most dangerous game of all: politics.
Pulp in a nutshell. When the stakes were high, the group displayed nothing but skill.
Je suis le chasseur et tu es la proie.
In the world of pulp, there’s a direct correlation between the stakes and the level of competence. At least this week.
The session started with what was supposed to be a cakewalk. The group (secret MI-X agent Mary Willard, millionaire industrialist Rafe Lancaster, Appalachian honey "Cousin" Clara Tate, and Yugoslavia smuggler Ivan “Ivo” Kochev) were in a railcar diner in New Jersey. Some local tough guys, the Hot Rods, were threatening to beat up a former member. Mary read the situation: this was a distraction so one of the Rods could rip off the register.
That's when ‘planning’ went out the window. Rafe tried to use his money to intimidate the punks, but they made fun of him.
Mary stood by the door and… stood by the door. Clara tried to be close to the register, but went over to help Rafe, who went back to his booth and sulked. Clara’s attempts to physically intimidate the crooks was interpreted as flirting. The robbery was only foiled because Ivo made a scene and everyone but Rafe was kicked out.
***
After that showing, the group was nervous about their next assignment: Versailles! The 2300-room mansion was being rented out for a historical dress-up weekend, and they had been hired as chaperones for the Honorable Association of Girl Socialites. (Except for Clara: she was the oldest member of the HAGS.)
The group split up into different roles: Ivo was a natural philosopher, Rafe represented the aristocracy, Clara joined the Scottish mercenary guard, and sneaky Mary Willard disguised herself as a valet. She had a clandestine mission: find who at the retreat was secretly royalty, and protect them to prevent an international incident.
The many, many teenage girls in attendance were vying to be crowned the Sun Queen. Rafe was torn between supporting his niece Anizah ( related to him, but very annoying) and the much more genteel HAG, Polina Orlova. How to pick?
The group faffed about, investigating rivals and trying to make the event profitable. Ivo refused to stop two German smugglers from looting the hall of paintings, figuring that the mansion was big enough for everyone. Clara caught wind of this however, and pressed him into service catching the crooks before she got blamed.
Meanwhile, Mary tried to solve the mystery of the Jester. Whoever it was had assigned themselves their own role, and was wearing a full disguise. The Jester used their anonymity order to mock participants and engage in intense frivolity. Mary, in order to suck up to some of the well-heeled rich teens, started putting up wanted posters for the prankster.
Rafe, who had brought some of his European employees to the party, was all about schmoozing. He was at a cigar party when he noticed someone trying to hide from him. It was Mr. Dudley, a former client. And more importantly, Regent of Arthur, teenage Prince of Borgovia!
Arthur had infiltrated the event as the Jester in order to impress his on-again and off-again girlfriend Devika. (Unfortunately, she wasn't even in attendance, but was instead in Paris modeling for fashionista Bea Bingen.) The group had to cause a distraction so he could change disguises and leave the festivities, before he was scandalously discovered or kidnapped!
Meanwhile, the mean girls picked on poor Anizah, putting rats in her bed. Since the adults were too busy to do anything about it, the HAGS planned to drop rats on their rivals during dinner! Ivo had to tell some fabulous lies to clear the area, while Rafe disabled the trap. Since there was an actual risk, the group worked together and succeeded. (Pollina, who had previously been proclaimed the Czarina of Russia in exile, had mixed feelings about being crowned Sun Queen. Clara reassured her pal that she was perfect for the role, being a ballerina and everything.)
***
Mary was recalled to England, and the group decided to have a relaxing and free retreat in Inverness. (It was comped after the group last’s visit, which involved aliens, a disappearance ray, and strange gray giants out of Scottish folklore.)
There, they had thorough relaxation, and ran into their old acquaintance: Rose-of-Sharon Thisby. She buried them in local gossip; the eccentric visitors of Lord Bracknell of Eilean Donan; the rumor that Irish gangsters were looting castles in the Highlands; that royal scientists were coming up any day now, to find Nessie with the power of sonar.
After contacting their friend Thaza, the Irish gangster raised-by-apes, group weren’t able to verify the rumors.
***
The next morning, a messenger pigeon arrived. Lord Bracknell had heard of their mighty deeds and wanted to discuss a security job related to gangsters. The group rambled over, and despite the incoming storm and poorly maintained roads, arrived before nightfall.
The castle itself was gorgeous but weatherworn. It was on a peninsula between three lochs, imposing and austere.
Inside, the well-informed lord peppered the group with questions and tried to play down his eccentric reputation. He expounded upon his worldview: that the Earth is a joy for the strong. Hadn’t all three guests proved their skill at dispatching the weak? After dinner, he plied them with 300-year-old Scotch …That's the last thing they remembered.
The mad lord chained them up in the dungeon. Assuming they didn't drown in the rapidly pooling deluge, they had three hours after fleeing his property before he would give chase. Next to the trio were the dead bodies of two O'Rourke gangsters.
As soon as he left, Ivo called on his smuggler instincts, using shims of old bone to free himself. The others wanted to flee immediately, but he had been mentally mapping the castle.
The group clambered over wet stones, avoiding the patrols and the hounds. They fed the poisoned scotch to the latter, retrieved their weapons, and headed towards the front door.
Rafe had a better idea though. The best way to flee the castle was by boat. Especially if they unchained all the other boats and dragged them into the currents to prevent pursuit.
Repairing the complaining motor, the trio headed north. Certainly the neighboring town would be under the influence of the madman, but Rafe had an ace up his sleeve. Or more accurately, a Breitling watch.
The drenched adventurers found a nearby pub. Bursting in, Clara pointed her rifle at anyone who dared to move. None dared. Rafe won over the crowd of scared Scots like it was an investor pitch. By the time he was through, his watch was traded for the only car in the village, and they had let him use the phone to call his European branch. Ivo snuck the group back to their inn. He then snuck away himself, because sitting in the dining room room was Majá Malgorźo, of the League of Nations Police Force!
Because of Lancaster's extreme wealth and connections, she planned to petition the Scottish government for an inquiry. The lord had lost the most dangerous game of all: politics.
Pulp in a nutshell. When the stakes were high, the group displayed nothing but skill.
