DM's head explodes, film at 11

[twistedoliver]

Love This!!

Have someone else play important NPCs. It works wonders for player fear levels.

I have used this a few times instead of having a player create a one night PC, i use them as NPc's. It makes my job as a DM much easier. And much deadlier to the PC's. My badguy player tried to coup-du-grace each player he dropped. He only got once chance, but boy did my players cringe.

Scott

 

[iwatt]

"I need anything but a '1'."
Of course, the outcome of the roll will be a '1'!

In the 3.0 campaign I play in I have a Cleric/Brb/Warpriest of Tempus. With a Fort Save up in the middle 20's (can go upt o hightwenties when raging). He also has a really high AC.

We're facing a Naga with alot of spellcasting ability and 3.0 Haste. The other PCs are having trouble hitting the damn thing, so I decide to walk past him and get into flanking position, in order to give the Other memebers a better chance. This of course will provoke an AoO. By the way, we use the rule that a nat 20--->30 and a nat1--->-10

DM: " That move will provoke an AoO, sure you want to do it"
Me: (confident grin since the DM had missed all of his last 6 attacks) " Davon heroically rolls through the reach of the foul beast in order to trap him."
DM: " Ok....the Naga attacks with it's posionous tail"
Me: (Still Grinning)
DM: "...roling...a 20...Critical Threat!! (evil glint in his eyes)..."
Me: "No problem ...there's no way you're confirming..."
DM:"...another 20...let me see, that's a natural weapon....x2..18 hps.roll for Fort Save DC 17"
Me: (Grin still going strong) " No problem...with my +26 fort asve I'll only miss on a 1......roll a 1."
...... 1...... (grin slips, panic begins to set in).
DM: " OK the naga does 3d8 Con damage...that's a 8 + 7 + 4 = 19. What's your Constitution like now?"
Melooking at the big fat 18 under Constitution on my Character Sheet) "..... "
DM: " Come on, how's Davon doing"
Me "...."
DM: (throwing me a bone) "well since the poison is happening during your action, and it isn't instantenous, I guess you have time to finish your action.
Me: "....."
Dm: "Well...:"
Me: " What the .... how did that happen"
DM: "we'ew waiting..."
Me " Well If I'm going down I'll go down swinging....Activate Rage..that gives me a +25 to hit...roll...1"
DM: "hehehe"
Other Player :" Hey doesn't rage raise your Con..."
Me: "....YES!!!"



I lucked into that one, but the DM never forgave himself for giving me that extra shot.

 

[Patryn of Elvenshae]

Wo... [/keanu]

3d8 Con damage? Crap on a Crutch, that's a lot!

Did you die anyway halfway through the fight, or live to fight another day?

 

[RithTheAwakener]

LOL!
Actually we had the EXACT same thing happen the other day, except against a PIT FIEND.
The pit fiend (who was controled by a crazy mage with the Crown of Horns and Staff O' Power), grappled our mage and flew around with him in his tail for...oh...about 8 rounds. Then the cleric focuses on the pit fiend, DESTRUCTION! Pit fiend gets a 1 on the save, and is completely wiped from existance, then the enemy mage broke his staff of power and most of us ALSO were wiped from existance.

 

[iwatt]

Wo... [/keanu]

3d8 Con damage? Crap on a Crutch, that's a lot!

Did you die anyway halfway through the fight, or live to fight another day?

Lived to die another day. But my cheesed out War cleric had to meekly step out and watch this fight from afar. Which gave the DM time to call me a wimp. Of course I did roll like a 17 on the seocdndary damage spell, but it was scary.

Anywho, after that my Cleric belieevs he is immortal... He touches doors with Slay lioving Wards on them, laughs at beholders with their measly desitegrate etc... It's just that The GIDs did all in their power (almost), but munchkin 3.0 melee clerics are downright scary.

 

[Crass]

I had a little episode of this today.

Three PCs ganged up on my poor little battlemage BBEG. Okay, it's a Gargantuan battlemage BBEG with stupid attack bonuses on account of giant size (OA/CArc), but still, hardly that bad.


Hong [DM, slightly paraphrased]: "FOOLISH MORTALS! YOU WILL DIE!"

Player: "Arjuna casts harm on him!"

Hong [slightly paraphrased]: "He laughs at your feeble attempt to cast a spell!"

[HONG ROLLS SAVE]
[HONG ROLLS NOT A 1]

Hong: "HAHA! He takes half damage!"

Player: "Thea also casts harm on him!"

Hong [slightly paraphrased]: "He laughs at your feeble attempt to cast a spell!"

[HONG ROLLS SAVE]
[HONG ROLLS A 1]

Hong: "... AH !"

[FX: BBEG DIES WITH A SURPRISED LOOK ON HIS FACE]
[PLAYER MAKES MANY OBSCENE GESTURES IN HONG'S GENERAL DIRECTION]

...

Player: "What's that evil mage at the back there doing?"

Hong: "HAHA! You don't know this, but he's readying to countersp--"

[HONG'S HEAD EXPLODES]

[ROLL CREDITS]

You should have seen your face when that '1' came up - unless it was the half a beer you'd drunk in the 45 minutes preceeding that point in the session

BTW, you ARE aware that Arjuna has about half his memorised spells as Inflict X (as he can spontaneously convert to healing), and that Thea has about 90% of her spells as Cure X - as she spontaneously converts to inflict spells - aren't you? Whose idea was it to give one of the players with a divine spellcaster PC a divine spellcaster NPC to control, anyway?

 

[hong]

You should have seen your face when that '1' came up - unless it was the half a beer you'd drunk in the 45 minutes preceeding that point in the session

It's karmic payback for the time I harmed you to death twice in two sessions, that's what it is.

BTW, you ARE aware that Arjuna has about half his memorised spells as Inflict X (as he can spontaneously convert to healing), and that Thea has about 90% of her spells as Cure X - as she spontaneously converts to inflict spells - aren't you? Whose idea was it to give one of the players with a divine spellcaster PC a divine spellcaster NPC to control, anyway?

Well, since you seemed to take a liking to her....