Does this make you want to keep reading?

[Herobizkit]

Here's a [ame=http://www.amazon.com/Underneath-Kathi-Appelt/dp/1416950583]really good book[/ame] that features animals predominately. They're not anthropomorphic, but the language that is used through the book suggests they are far more intelligent than common animals.

 

[Umbran]

- First person, but the dog is a regular dog. This strikes me as fun to imagine and it's where I started, but am clearly struggling with how to adequately project myself into an alien mind. How do you adequately convey the point of view of a being whose primary sense is scent, with hearing and sight secondary (and both much different than ours)?

I think more important is the fact that dogs aren't verbal creatures. Using 1st person to describe an alien mind is doable, so long as you can think of the narrative as a fairly direct translation. While dogs have emotions and thought processes, they cannot be cleanly represented by an internal monolog or dialog.

 

[Umbran]

Beyond Zelazny? It's not an easy format, I think.

It depends on what you call "good fiction", I expect. I think Jim Butcher does a good job of first person in the Dresden Files books, but I know not everyone calls them "good fiction".

I recently picked up "The Hunger Games", and I noticed something about 1st person narrative - it is a touch weird when the speaker does not have an assumed audience that plausibly doesn't know what is happening.

The Dresden Files works from the conceit that there's this secret supernatural world under your own, so you, the reader, can be this audience. You don't know that supernatural world, so Harry can plausibly spend a lot of effort explaining it to you.

In "The Hunger Games", so far, the main character's universe lacks any people who aren't part of the main character's society. The reader cannot be that audience - our world is gone before hers arises - I'm *dead*. Nobody she can be talking to would need the explication. It irks me.

 

[Thunderfoot]

Obviously I'm the only one here who recognizes an airborne operation.
The ramp is down, because they are departing a perfectly made aircraft with a 50 cent handkerchief. The "hawk wind" is that rushing blast of air that assaults you when you are traveling at speed in an open cockpit (or cargo bay in this case).

Your verb-age is really about your target audience. I got it, most folks didn't. If this was being marketed towards a Military crowd, like W.E.B. Griffiths or Tom Clancy, it would work fine as is. If you are targeting a general audience, including an appendix of jargon might be helpful (ala Robert Jordan) or try to use everyday P.F.C. speech. (I know you'll get that).

I like it, I'm intrigued, I think the dog angle is awesome and could be adapted to many cross platform book formats. I notice I'm in the minority, but that doesn't mean it doesn't have wings, it just means you might have to know how to earn those wings in order to "get it". HOOAH!

Eric "Thunderfoot" Stearns
CHAIRBORNE!!!!

 

[Olgar Shiverstone]

Obviously I'm the only one here who recognizes an airborne operation.
The ramp is down, because they are departing a perfectly made aircraft with a 50 cent handkerchief. The "hawk wind" is that rushing blast of air that assaults you when you are traveling at speed in an open cockpit (or cargo bay in this case).

Thought someone might pick it up eventually. But I'll certainly have to balance the use of jargon for a less "tuned-in" audience. Though since the dog's the neophyte he gets to explain everything the first time around.

The visuals might help everyone else:

/Olgar - CJTF-82 OEF 09-10