Don't You Hate It When...

[Olaf the Stout]

Don’t you hate it when…

I found this web page that has quite a few funny “Don’t you hate it when moments in it. I’m sure we could add a few more though. I’ll start us off.

Don’t you hate it when…

Your Periapt of Health catches a cold
Your Sun Blade clouds over
You can’t catch your Boots of Speed to put them on
You can’t lift up your Belt of Giant’s Strength to put it on
You wish that you knew where your Ring of Wishes was
Your Cloak of Charisma has more friends than you do

Olaf the Stout

 

[Raylis]

Don't you hate it when

Your immovable rod gets stuck...
Your rod of lordly might revolts...
Your bag of tricks runs out...
you can't find your hat of disguise ...
your well of many worlds backs up...

 

[shadowbloodmoon]

I have a few...

Don't you hate it when:

Your Sword of Dancing has two left feet...
Your Staff of Striking..goes on strike...
Your Cloak of Resistance refuses to let you wear it...
You lose your Dust of Disappearance...
You Intelligent Sword is smarter than you are...and tells you about it...

 

[Olgar Shiverstone]

... Disguise Self always looks like you.
... you can't move your portable hole.
... you try to turn undead, but just keep on living.
... your Mordenkainen's Faithful Hound runs away.
... the gelatinous cube is more rhomboid.
... you're the last cleric of Mystra to be Chosen.
... 10 ranks in tumble, and you still slip on banana peels.

 

[Slife]

Your Cloak of Resistance is futile


(had to be said)

 

[megamania]

Don't you hate it when....

Your Favored Enemy is X and you see only Y

Every Drow you meet is a CG ranger

Your Decanter of Endless Water runs dry

Your Lawful Weapon gets finiky

Your Rat familiar is eaten by the party's other mage's familiar- a cat

a familiar is smarter than the sorcerer that empowers it

your barbarian enjoys watching Law and Order

 

[mythusmage]

...your Secure Shelter has anxiety attacks.
...your Tome of Wisdom can't get a clue.
...your Everfull Purse has only plugged nickels.
...the BBEG retires and hires you to get rid of his stuff for him.
...troglodytes complain about your smell.
...kobolds refuse to face you in combat because fighting you is so patently unfair.
...dragons ask if your parents are around.
...ogres check to see if you're chipped.
...halflings talk down to you.
...you learned magic from Dweomers for Dummies
...your sword has the legend on the hilt, "Hold by this end."
...you've reached tenth and you're still subject to curfew.
...you can't drink potions of healing because you're underage.
...you keep getting tickets for having an unlicensed Wand of Wonder

 

[MarkB]

Your Cloak of Resistance is futile


(had to be said)

...your Bead of Force turns to the dark side
...your Handy Haversack is out of reach
...your Eversmoking Bottle quits on you


Incidentally, was I the only one to get Alanis Morisette's Isn't it Ironic playing in his head while reading this thread? And how do I get it to stop?

 

[Evilhalfling]

- your potion of tounges licks you

 

[megamania]

In my campaign they sometimes do!