Dungeon 169 - Oasis of the Golden Peacock


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I've read about 1/3 of it so far, and this is a very cool adventure. There are several stand-out encounters that look like a lot of fun. Nice work!

My once/month group probably won't be level 7 until late 2010, but I'm looking forward to running this whenever they get there.
 

Shroomy -

Would you be interested in taking some time to talk about the process in getting the adventure published? Like how much discussion you had with the editor(s), how long from pitch to draft to complete, etc.

I'm one of those nerds who really enjoy the "behind the scenes" stuff. I don't know if other people are interested in that kind of minutiae...
 

Shroomy -

Would you be interested in taking some time to talk about the process in getting the adventure published? Like how much discussion you had with the editor(s), how long from pitch to draft to complete, etc.

I'm one of those nerds who really enjoy the "behind the scenes" stuff. I don't know if other people are interested in that kind of minutiae...

Sure. The adventure was largely inspired by a pair of Dragon magazine articles. The first was Wolfgang Baur's "Dreams of Arabia: Creatures from Antiquity" from issue 334. In my original pitch, Hazar was actually the adventure's main villain and Emrett (she had a different name up until recently) was her apprentice (though they still hated each other). Also, Hazar was not a sphinx; instead she was an evil simurgh (a monster from Persian myth that appeared in the Dragon article), which is where the peacock and bird themes originally came from. The second Dragon article was from the "Class Acts: Druid" article from Issue 339 that introduced a more scholary, fey-orientated variant druid called a sidhe scholar. Emrett was originally a sidhe scholar, which is were the fey and academic themes originated.

With all that done, I submitted my initial query to Paizo in late September 2006 and I waited, not knowing until later that WotC was reassuming control of the magazines. After they did take them back Paizo transferred the slushpile to Wizards and Chris Youngs contacted me in late July 2007 and told me he was interested in publishing the adventure. We had numerous discussions about the adventure and it changed multiple times as we went back and forth until it was largely similar to what you see today (by that time, 4e had been announced, so I was actually incorporating some of the new ideas regarding the newfangled "Feywild" into my adventure).

I had about two months to write the 3.5e draft and turned it in on 11-30-2007. Originally, it was going to appear that winter, but then it got delayed again until the spring, but the impending release of 4e and the resultant changeover in the magazines seemingly did not bode well for me. However, after 4e came out and I got a full look at the system, I asked Chris if I could convert it to 4e, and after a while, he agreed. There was some back and forth with Chris (and through him R&D) about what 3.5e elements to keep and what needed to be changed (Emrett was a perfect fit for a fey pact warlock and I'm much happier with her in 4e, as in 3.5e she was a bit of a glass cannon who needed to cast a long list of spells before she could survive combat, much less be effective at it), and then he turned me over to Steve Winters, who worked with me again.

Again, there was a lot of discussion and then I set out to essentially re-write the adventure. I handed it in early June 2009 and then there were some more changes that had to be made due to space considerations. Luckily, some of what got cut is going to appear in a Side Trek in the near future.
 



Hey Shroomy,

Congrats on getting published and thanks for sharing your process on getting published. I'm wondering if you could provide some more insight on your query. In the past, I've sent a few querries to Paizo (when they were running things) and they weren't interested. My biggest struggle has always been, how to make the pitch. Any chance you can share your pitch to WotC? Perhaps an example of it (if you still have it).

Thanks.
 

Hey Shroomy,

Congrats on getting published and thanks for sharing your process on getting published. I'm wondering if you could provide some more insight on your query. In the past, I've sent a few querries to Paizo (when they were running things) and they weren't interested. My biggest struggle has always been, how to make the pitch. Any chance you can share your pitch to WotC? Perhaps an example of it (if you still have it).

Thanks.

I didn't have to re-pitch The Oasis of the Golden Peacock to WotC, they went off my initial query sent to Paizo, which was written using their submission guidelines. I haven't had any success with my queries sent using WotC's guidelines, but I think being persisent, knowing what both the editors and readers are looking for, and have well-written, strong ideas is the way to go. At least, its the method I'm going to keep using.
 

Read it, like it. :)

Well, except for the skill challenges, but I've really only seen one of those that I really like, so you're in good company there. They're actually not horrible, but I don't think we've hit on the best way of using them yet.

The desert setting, the trigger, the extra unexplored material? Oh, love that a lot.

More on my blog.

Cheers!
 

The choice of monsters: Quicklings, spriggans, and a fang golem just felt... out of place. I know there's a fey portal at the bottom, but those monsters just didn't seem to .. fit. The satyr, though, seems to fit.

That first encounter, with three soldiers? Ouch. There's also very little in the way of giving PCs clues to where to go - unless they Skill Challenge it out of a captive. Which side of the Dune is the leeway, and which is the Wind side? Also, 'it's difficult terrain, but if you succeed in a skill check, moving is normal'; it becomes normal terrain if you succeed in the check, or remains difficult terrain?

You give a PC an automatic arcana check for the corralaxes, right? I doubt a PC would instinctively check the threat of birds sitting in the tree.

The lovers nest is indeed a great encounter. The only problem I find with it is that if the PCs don't attack Taalah, then a lot of things don't happen (Saqr doesn't get to use some of his powers, the Quickling and Taalah stay out of the fight). Because I doubt most PCs would attack a naked and defenseless woman, the above outcome is likely. At which point the encounter (aside from the situation) isn't that interesting; Saqr by himself, without his cool Taalah protecting powers, is rather boring.

Really like Hazar's stats. However, her tactics are BRUTAL. It will be a pain in the butt given her flight to hurt her for any non-ranged PCs. Also fighting her in the nest is very bad, given that the party is going to get a sentinel patrol up in their face.

06: What are the red lines on the map for?

I agree with Merric's observation on his blog that this is difficuilt and curious, as it makes a great use for a campaign. Wiggling it in earlier, with Voor. Emrett makes a great villain purely by her personality and actions in combat, so it's sad that the PCs only encounter her once. And as Merric points out, given that it's a desertadventure with an arabic feel, you gott ado some work to make it "work" in your setting. :)

However, this adventure is great. Especially teh arabian feel of it. A lot of work was put in and it's got several gems.
 
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