Ever had a game stolen from you?

[Olaf the Stout]

I had a similar situation occur. 3 players quit my game about 18 months into the campaign and then asked to join the game that another player in my group (Garry) was running. Garry (the player in my group who was running the other game) was really good about the situation, making sure that I was ok with the situation before he let the 3 who quit join his game.

I told Garry it was ok, but to watch out as they might do the same thing to his game that they did to mine. In the end I got 3 players to replace the 3 that left my game (including 2 players from Garry's game) and we've been playing together for over 2 years now.

The new group works so much better now and I'm very happy that the 3 players decided to leave the group. I actually spend the sessions running the campaign, rather than arguing with a player who wants me to change the way rules work.

As an interesting side note, the 3 players that quit my game then did the exact thing to Garry's game, quitting the game after about 6 months because Garry refused to run the game the way that wanted him to. I think he is happier now that they left too!

So you can see that sometimes situations like this occuring aren't always a bad thing. It certainly worked out better for me, despite the fact that did result in an 18 month campaign coming to an abrupt end without a proper conclusion.

Olaf the Stout

 

[S'mon]

To top it off, I decided to cancel the game today because of bad weather, and they decided to run anyway, without me.

This hasn't really been addressed - if it's physically possible for you to get to the venue, then barring a major family emergency or *serious* illness you really should not be cancelling. You are the GM, the group depends on you. I really can't stand GMs who cancel games willy-nilly, and if I thought a GM was cancelling for a trivial reason I'd certainly leave his game or do what your players did. There are a couple at my Meetup who seem to cancel rather casually, and I would not play in their games.

 

[Holy Bovine]

This hasn't really been addressed - if it's physically possible for you to get to the venue, then barring a major family emergency or *serious* illness you really should not be cancelling. You are the GM, the group depends on you. I really can't stand GMs who cancel games willy-nilly, and if I thought a GM was cancelling for a trivial reason I'd certainly leave his game or do what your players did. There are a couple at my Meetup who seem to cancel rather casually, and I would not play in their games.

Before I respond to this could you define what makes a 'major' family emergency or 'serious' illness?

 

[Vyvyan Basterd]

You know, I don't have to be introspective. I am currently running a very successful Thursday night game that the players in that game rave about and I have a very large number of successful games under my belt since I began running back in 19*cough*cough*. I know I am a good Storyteller and I've never had anyone walk out of my games, let alone have anyone do anything like this. I have talked to another ST who ran for them (after the fact) and said he had the same problems and those two eventually walked out on him even when everyone else was enjoying the game, and I ran a game that they enjoyed almost two years ago.

The problem is they don't like this one. And that's OK. Like others have said, you are lucky they are being honest and upfront about this. There have been many threads about problem players. Many of those stem from a player disliking their GM's game, but being too immature to bring the problem to the forefront. I'm assuming the two players you are painting in a bad light aren't that bad because your two "good" players want to continue playing with them. It is merely a clash of styles. And even if they liked your style two years ago, they may be in the mood for something different now. So either change your style to accomodate them or let someone else take the reigns until the group is ready for your style again. You are veering really close to gaming snobbery and onetruewayism here and it could cost you some good gaming buddies if you can't find a way to compromise to others tastes and current gaming desires.

 

[Raven Crowking]

No DM is duty-bound to run something they don't want to or at any given time.

No player is duty-bound to wait for any given DM to run what they like or when they like.

That, in a nutshell, is all there is to it.


RC

 

[Snoweel]

Before I respond to this could you define what makes a 'major' family emergency

Infidelity.

or 'serious' illness?

Cholera.

 

[S'mon]

Before I respond to this could you define what makes a 'major' family emergency or 'serious' illness?

Major family emergency - eg a loved one is in hospital, or they're suddenly ill and you had to go with them to casualty/ER right before the game. Obviously if your wife says "It's me or the game" you may need to cancel, but if it happens often don't be surprised if you lose players.

Serious illness - something that leaves you physically unable to GM (bad swine flu on up), or something both serious (not a cold) & infectious.

A hurricane, bridge washed out etc might also be a reasonable excuse - extreme weather that makes getting to the game siginificantly dangerous.

Not a good excuse, IMO: "I have an exam tomorrow", "My friend is visiting", "The Northern Line is closed and it'll take me an extra 2 hours round trip" - the last happened to me, I sucked it up and got on the bus.

Edit: This is the standard I hold GMs to, including me. If I'm GMing and players want to blow off the game to revise or spend time with their friends/family etc, it can be mildly annoying, but whatever. I won't chuck them out of my game, I'll just run without them.

 

[Aberzanzorax]

The "when is it ok to cancel" is an interesting discussion...so interesting, that I'm starting (forking?) a new thread that's less specific to this one to ask about it.

Edit. Linky: http://www.enworld.org/forum/genera...ession-not-attending-session.html#post5129395

 

[Oryan77]

This hasn't really been addressed - if it's physically possible for you to get to the venue

I was wondering the same thing. I'm sure there is a good explanation because the OP doesn't sound like the kind of DM that would just cancel a game without a good reason. It sounds like he loves playing D&D, so I'm sure he felt he needed to cancel.

But what I'm wondering is; if the weather was bad enough to cancel the game, then how were the other players able to get together to run their own game? It's usually the players that cancel for any old excuse...and that's usually because they are actually just wanting to play some WoW or whatever.

For me, some rain or lightning ain't stopping me from making it to a game...I love playing D&D during stormy weather!

 

[Tewligan]

Not a good excuse, IMO: "I have an exam tomorrow", "My friend is visiting", "The Northern Line is closed and it'll take me an extra 2 hours round trip" - the last happened to me, I sucked it up and got on the bus.

Weird - I would consider all those to be perfectly valid excuses.