[Exalted] Solar Circle of the West - whole slew of updates 3/8/09

[Ao the Overkitty]

Synopsis of 10/24/05 session - "He Kills Puppies For the Malfeans"

Synopsis of 10/24/05 session

"He Kills Puppies For the Malfeans"


A-dom started the session stuck in a very cramped box, bouncing down the street in a carriage. Jade’s Luck trailed behind, wondering when Jahar was going to get there. She followed the procession to a walled House Mnemon estate (though she didn’t know that). She looked around for a runner or urchin to send another message, but in this pre-dawn time, the streets were pretty much deserted. She could see a marketplace a short distance away, though.

Meanwhile, Jahar was getting ready for the wedding. With the ceremony at dawn, the parties were well placed to only allow minimal time for the groom to get ready, mostly so he would have no time to flee. After the ceremony, a breakfast reception would be held.

Back with A-dom, the box opened and A-dom was hauled out and taken into a nearby building. He had healed a little of the damage from the whipping, but was still in rough shape. The building was a hot, humid Roman style bathhouse with various writings scrawled on the walls. His shackles were removed and he was left with Mnemon Fazil and a large number of slaves, including children. The slaves were all wearing less clothing than A-dom, which was hard considering he was still only clad in his flap. Unspeakable things occurred to A-dom at this point, which lead him to become very, VERY angry. He focused on one particular saying written upon the bathhouse wall and repeated it quietly.

A-dom: Those who feel free when they escape only go from the cooking fire into the volcano.

A-dom got stronger, picked up a slave and swung. Those around him stared in shock as A-dom got even stronger (and angrier), yanked a pillar out of its support position, and smashed it down on Fazil. He then proceeded to swing the pillar around at head level to take out some stunned and fleeing slaves.

Outside, Jade’s Luck head one of the buildings in the compound collapsing.

Back with Jahar, he was brought into where the ceremony was going to take place. This was in a large courtyard in the largest Cynis compound in the city. The courtyard was covered in flowers, silken sashes and all sorts of vibrant colors; especially a lot of red (House Sessus) and a lot of greens and browns (House Cynis). Jahar was led around to greet several important people; far too many rattled off in succession to transcribe. Jara’s father was a wood aspect dragon-blood and looked like Rurouni Kenshin wearing a big flower. There was at least one member from each of the four Houses that had representation on Atlantis. The judge, Peleps Mog, waved him over to where his blushing bride was waiting, clutching her GoreMaul.

A-dom found the bathhouse falling down around him, so he ran out through a wall. He headed for the main house, because there were likely more people there. Seeing three guards running towards him, he shifted his pillar into one arm and upright so he could clothesline the lead guard with his free arm.

Once that guy was down, A-dom jumped on his head to make sure he was dead. To Jade’s Luck, this looked like a pillar emerged from a crumbling building, bobbed across a courtyard, then stopped briefly to bounce in one place. Getting to the main house, he made his own door and continued slaughtering and destroying. After hearing the smashing and the screaming Jade’s Luck leapt the wall and went to investigate. His pillar came to its ultimate demise when threw it down on some guards.

Back at the wedding, the judge began the ceremony.

Peleps Mog: We are brought here today at dawn, to see the glorious beginning of a marriage between the great houses of Cynis and Sessus. Like the wood and fire their families represent, they will work together to create something more powerful then each element alone.

Gareth: (mutters quietly) A burning stick?

Gareth got elbowed by a couple of people around him.

Peleps Mog: But beyond that it is the first steps of this loving couple into adulthood.

A-dom, now pillar-less, had to improvise. He lifted up half of the remaining house and smashed it onto the other half. With no more immediate victims, A-dom headed for the wall. Ripping a large chunk out of it, he strolled towards the marketplace. Jade’s Luck activated Terrifying Apparition of Glory and took the long was around to get ahead of him. Luckily for her, she was hurrying and A-dom was strolling and stopping to crush puppies. Jade’s Luck got ahead of him and yelled for everyone to run in the opposite direction for where A-dom was coming from. Seeing all these people fleeing just made A-dom angrier. He flung his wall section at the fleeing townspeople, catching the stranglers. Getting annoyed at Jade’s Luck, he picked up some of the road and threw it at her. But something about Jade’s Luck made him subconsciously not want to hit her. So, when he threw the road at her, he missed. This just made him angrier.

Peleps Mog: They are finally taking up their responsibility, not just to their families, but to the realm and to the Scarlet Empress,

Crowd: Long reign the Empress

Peleps Mog: And to the entirety of Creation. The greatest responsibility of any citizen is to ensure that more Dragon Blooded Children are born, and raised by the great houses.

A-dom monkey leapt onto Jade’s Luck. She quickly dodged and ran away from him, in a direction not concurrent with the other fleeing people (roughly towards the wedding). A-dom followed after her. He hurled a stall at her, but again missed her (smashed another stall and there was some screaming). A-dom found a horse stable. He hurled a man into the stable. Unfortunately, the man went through an opening and not a wall. Blood and hilarity ensued.

Peleps Mog: The couple must set aside their childish past, petty personal goals, as well as dreams of domination, and take up the rolls they were fated to play, as husband and wife, father and mother. They must give up their greedy dreams of jade and gold. Overcome their petty desires of conquest. Give up wasteful vices. Abandon so called friends who do not support the goals of their marriage wholeheartedly. By doing these things they will have more room in their hearts and time in their lives for the compassion and caring needed to organize their household to raise their children for them.

A-dom swung some horses like clubs and threw some others. Jade’s Luck cramped his style by telling more people to run away. A-dom smacked her with a horse. She ran away. He hurled his horse at her. A-dom was found by a squadron of soldiers and made merry sport of them. Jade’s Luck found someone to send to tell Gareth.

Peleps Mog: Even though one may pass into death before the other, what is important, is what you do with your time together. For what you do in each life affects the path of your soul on it's way to enlightenment.

Now the couple will say their vows.

Cynis Jara: I, Cynis Jara, take this step into adulthood and marriage with all the seriousness and gravity that it deserves. I will make sure we do our best to serve the Realm and the Empress for the entire length of our lives. I will also insure that we do our best to serve both of our families with loyalty and devotion. With all these people as my witness I take this Sessus as my lawful husband.

A-dom finished playing with the soldiers by flipping the road they were standing on upside down, crushing them.

Sessus Jahar: I, Sessus Wejin Jahar, am proud to walk firmly into adulthood, to take my responsibilities to the Realm and to my family in the most utmost sincerity. I will joyfully work with my new wife to bring as many exalted children to this Realm as our loins will bear. I gladly do this out of loyalty to the realm, my family, and to further the wishes of the Dragons. Through our future children I shall become a far greater servant of the Realm than I could have otherwise achieved. I am certain our intelligence and good breeding will bring great success and progeny to House Cynis. With honor and service in mind, I take this Cynis as my lawful wife.

Peleps Mog: And now they are wed!

Crowd: *Cheers*

Peleps Mog: Now to the reception and breakfast!

A-dom decided that those houses had to go. So, A-dom got even stronger and, in a feat of strength, played dominoes with some row houses. He knocked out an entire block and managed to have a house jump a street to continue the chain for two more houses.

Back at the wedding banquet, Tiger was the only one to notice the distance rumbling. Jahar was currently engaged in opening presents (one item of note was a smoking blue liquid from Cujag labeled ‘For the Wedding Night’). Tiger went over to Gareth to ask if he had heard it, but Gareth passed it off as Tiger’s stomach.

As A-dom is sitting down for a moment to enjoy the spectacle. A little boy ran down the street yelling Grandma! A-dom chucked a brick at him, killing the child. Jade’s Luck was running back towards him at this point and witnessed the death of the small child. That sight twisted inside of her. A-dom got up and knocked down some more buildings. Jade’s Luck thwacked him with her chakram to get his attention.

Back at the banquet, Tiger was standing atop a building, looking at the destruction in the city. He noticed that the destruction was very selective. He also saw some troop movements, but no individuals. He got down and told Gareth.

Gareth: Isn’t that supposed to be the Dragon-bloods’ job?

Tiger: Yeah, but aren’t we supposed to be heroes or something?

Gareth: I guess we should go investigate.

Jahar noticed this conversation, but thought nothing of it. He was currently looking at a nice reading chair from his father-in-law.

Tiger felt he should stay and keep an eye on Jahar to make sure he stayed safe, so Gareth grabbed a tray-full of bacon and headed off into the city.

Jade’s Luck proved difficult for A-dom to hit, but he managed to amass some coincidental damage. A-dom yelled a lot at her.

A-dom: YOU DIE NOW!

Jade’s Luck responded by making faces at him and running away.

Ryan: I know how Wile E. Coyote feels now.

As Gareth is strolling down the street eating bacon, a fourteen-fifteen year old kid stops in front of him.

Kid: You only have one eye.

Gareth: Yeah.

Kid: Are you Gareth?

Gareth: Yeah.

Kid: Were you at a wedding?

Gareth: Yeah.

Kid: Oh good. A-dom lost his temper at Mnemon Fazil’s house. Is breaking everything. And oh my god, I need help. I’m going to flee the city now. Goodbye.

Gareth set down the bacon in the street and ran back to get Tiger. He remembered that different incarnations of A-dom have lost their temper. He didn’t remember how bad that was, just that it tends to happen. He discretely got a hold of Tiger and told him once they were outside.

A-dom quickly got frustrated chasing Luck and ran full steam into a building to kill people inside. This time, he noticed Jade’s Luck throwing her chakram and grabbed a wall to block her weapon.

Gareth and Tiger got close enough to the destruction to hear Jade’s Luck’s yells to flee. They managed to ignore her commands and caught up to her. Gareth stopped to ask her what was going on while Tiger ran on to face A-dom. A-dom grabbed another wall to defend himself against Tiger’s attacks (which weren’t with Diplomacy). Faced with Tiger, and the others, A-dom tried to flee. He almost got away, but Tiger managed to seriously pummel him into unconsciousness. Gareth picked up the unconscious A-dom and the Circle jumped down one of the many holes in the ground, into the sewers.

Jahar mingled at the banquet, trying to make acquaintances and alliances at the party. He got his father-in-law to really like him.

Tiger led the Circle to a decent little room in the sewers with a bed/pallet. Tiger plopped down on the bed, then got up when the rest of the Circle prompted. Laying A-dom down, Gareth noticed he was armed with a sword he had picked up from one of the soldiers. Gareth took the sword and bent it around A-dom’s wrists to form makeshift manacles. When A-dom awoke, he groggily looked around, then activated Vanish From Mind’s Eye. Everyone forgot who A-dom was. The Circle became very confused since their memories became swiss cheese.

There is no A-dom: (meekly) don’t kill me.

As the Circle questioned him, he repeated his statement.

Gareth: Apparently his name is Don’t Kill Me.

Jade’s Luck latched onto the idea that he must have gotten frisky with one of her charges and he didn’t have the money to pay her, so he was in her servitude.

There is no A-dom: (meekly) kill me.

Jade’s Luck led him to knock himself unconscious again. The Circle then proceeded as they usually do to discuss things endlessly. It took a lot of convincing to get Jade’s Luck off of the ‘he owes her money’ idea. I’m not sure they did. Gareth unbound his hands and rebound them behind his back, to make sure he couldn’t hurt himself again.

The naked brown man woke up again and accused Jade’s Luck of hitting him. She denied that, but his story was magically plausible. She accused him of trying to kill a puppy, since she wouldn’t harm someone without a reason.

There is no A-dom: No! I love puppies! And give children candy!

He stated that he was running from the dragon-bloods cause he had started shining and didn’t know why.

Jade’s Luck: You must have been doing something naughty or I wouldn’t have hit you.

There is no A-dom: (whiny) No. You’re mean.

Gareth: Strangely I believe him and not you.

He accused her of knocking over buildings, or at least he thought she helped. He couldn’t see. He finally latched on the idea that it was a Penguin knocking over the buildings and the Wyld.

Gareth: The Wyld is encroaching on Atlantis. We are so screwed.

J-mal, formerly referred to as There is no A-dom, continued to go on about shrabbits and helped the Circle convince itself that Jade’s Luck thought he was a penguin when she beat him up. Since the Wyld messes with people’s heads, this was entirely plausible. J-mal also blamed his being brown on the Wyld.

Jade’s Luck suggested contacting Jahar’s new wife, since she was good at dealing with the Wyld.

J-mal: No. No. Jahar was one of the names I heard. He’s scary. We shouldn’t talk to him.

They decided to let J-mal rest for a little so he would be able move more easily. So, they rested for two hours and eighteen minutes for J-mal to put up Body Mending Meditation and get out of Incapacitated.

Meanwhile, Jahar was chatting at the banquet with an old friend, who was a member of Jara’s adventuring troop. They discussed how to the marriage would affect their adventuring and how Jahar got suckered into this and stuff.

Tiger led the Circle back to a sewer entrance near Gareth’s shop. Once there, Gareth quickly cleaned off and told Jade’s Luck she got to clean J-mal off, since he had to carry him. Gareth went out front and sent his slave off to Sara’s house to make sure she was okay and work with her for the rest of the day. The troops were gathering and patrolling, so he made a quiet and safe journey. Gareth returned and, once the rest were cleaned off, Gareth grabbed a pair of his own pants and gave them to Jade’s Luck to put them on J-mal.

J-mal told more confusing stories about being born a poor brown child and meeting Opec and touching it.

Jade’s Luck: Rule Number One. Don’t glow around Dragon-bloods.

J-mal: I didn’t know! I made a mistake and started glowing and they started chasing me and buildings were falling down and you hit me. I was saving a puppy.

Liz: Do I really have to believe I was saving a puppy? You are so dead when you drop this charm.

J-mal: I was saving a puppy and I started glowing.

As the reception wound down, Jahar and Jara got shuffled off to a little cottage outside of town. Jahar drank his potion and woke up three days later in bed next to an exhausted Jara.

The Circle hunkered down in the shop during this time. J-mal rested and healed. Gareth switched J-mal’s makeshift manacles for real ones, then worked on some weapons. When J-mal woke up, he yawned and the manacles fell off. Gareth put J-mal to work helping with making weapons. The others got put to work helping around the shop. Gareth took the time to redo the second weapon he had made for Jahar, feeling that it could be done better. Gareth took Jade’s Luck aside and convinced her to stop blaming J-mal and maybe she owed him for hitting him in the head with her chakram. The morning after, Jade’s Luck brought J-mal an I’m Sorry muffin.

When Jahar returned to the city he found out something had destroyed chunks of it. Most of it was Mnemon property, so no one he talked to was too sad about that. People remembered a little woman running around telling people to run away. Jara’s troop was eager to go investigate this and was waiting for her return. When he returned to his room at the Sessus estate, he found a note for him from Gareth saying his sword was ready.

Jahar got to Gareth’s shop and found the Circle, plus a brown guy he’d never seen before.

J-mal: Oh thank god! This has been driving me freaking nuts.

The Circle explained who J-mal was to Jahar.

J-mal tricked Jade’s Luck out of the way and moved behind Jahar. He then dropped the charm and everyone remembered who A-dom was again. Jade’s Luck and Tiger went ballistic.

A-dom: It’s okay.

Jade’s Luck: It’s not okay. You bricked a baby in the head!

A-dom: It seemed like the right thing to do.

Jade’s Luck lost the use of coherent though as she sputtered words and kept trying to start a sentence.

A-dom: (holding Jahar in front of him) Let’s put that aside for a second.

Jade’s Luck got redder and redder.

A-dom: Small armies of dragon-bloods outside looking for me.

Jade’s Luck continued to sputter while Jahar and Tiger tred to make sense of the situation.

Gareth: Why don’t we go to O-pec’s island for a while.

A-dom, of course, latched onto that idea and agreed whole-heartedly. Jade’s Luck went into a rant about A-dom’s atrocities. Gareth tried several times to get her attention by saying her name.

Gareth: Jade…Jade’s Luck… We’ll discuss this on the ship.

Jade’s Luck: No. No. No. I don’t think so!

Gareth then picked the little, red faced, furious woman a foot off the ground so she couldn’t attack A-dom physically. She squirmed and swung, but couldn’t get free. She tried beating on him, but Gareth’s skin was too tough for her blows.

Jahar: You do realize that my wife and her brother are currently trying to figure out what caused this destruction.

Gareth: This is why we’re going to get on the ship and visit O-pec RIGHT NOW.

A-dom: We need to leave the island and I need to find some Wyld. I need to turn purple or orange or anything not brown.

The Circle discussed this some more, despite the urgency of the matter.

A-dom: What do you want me to say? I was hiding! Really well.

Gareth: A-dom. Go to the boat as sneakily as possible.

A-dom walked out of the shop and ceased to be A-dom once again. Gareth was still planning on going to the island, but no longer had the sense of urgency. He also forgot why he was holding Jade’s Luck off the ground and put her down. Jahar decided he wanted to stick around Atlantis for a week to catch up on things and find out about what was going on with the destruction. Gareth said he could come back to pick him up in a week.

Gareth went and explained to his slave that he was going to go on a business trip for about a month. The shop was restocked, so he’d have stuff to sell again.

Once A-dom got to the boat, he dropped the charm and hid himself like an invisible statue. Jade’s Luck took off towards the boat to find A-dom and beat the crap out of him.

 

[Ao the Overkitty]

Synopsis of 11/07/05 session - "Candy From God"

Synopsis of 11/07/05 session

"Candy From God"

Gareth, Tiger, A-dom, and Jade’s Luck spent majority of their time on Hoen-ba Island. Jahar was otherwise engaged at the moment and didn’t bring A-dom his stuff. This made A-dom sad. Now that Both Tiger and Gareth spoke the Hoen-ba barbarian language, conversations with the locals were much easier. They now had a third convert at their temple; a six year old. Jade’s Luck and Gareth took to handing out candy to the followers, which made them happier followers.

Gareth: The Unconquered Sun grants candy to good followers.

Paul: Ooh. We might be able to get more children with this theory.

A-dom: There is going to be a problem. If we convert all of the children, the adults are going to get upset.

Gareth: Bah. Tiger, A-dom. We’re going to need more candy.

A-dom: No.

And thus the candy and anti-candy sects of the church of the Unconquered Sun were formed.

A-dom: If we’re going to do this, we’re going to do this right. If you’re going to convert people to a religion, you don’t just get the children. It doesn’t work.

Gareth: Why not? We’ve got time for them to grow into adults.

Tiger: Get them while they’re young.

A-dom: The way we should really be doing it is by making their lives better and not by giving them round children. We should be impressing them and like giving them nice things and improving their life. Like making them a big well, which they have. But something they want, we give them, cause we’re nifty.

Gareth: But, I’ve already given them canoes and I gave the chieftain a sea-worthy boat.

Tiger: But if we convert them, they’ll grow up and convert their children and then we’ve got the island.

Jade’s Luck: I don’t think we have to worry about round children from one bag of candy.

A-dom: But, in six months, we’ll have twelve children standing around going ‘Candy?’

Jade’s Luck: I gave three of them candy cause they’re children and they’re cute.

A-dom went on to try to pin the ‘candy from god’ concept on Jade’s Luck while Gareth fully admitted it was his idea. After all, Gareth was never good at the whole religion thing and seized what he thought was a profitable idea. A-dom made some good, intelligent points.

Tiger: When did you get so smart?

*A-dom holds up his black book*

This devolved into Jade’s Luck saying this was just the evil necromancer talking. A-dom rebutted that there was no separate necromancer personality and it was just a hobby, anyway.

Gareth: (to Jade’s Luck) He was just trying to annoy you. You do realize this, right?

A-dom: I did not spend all that time and experience just to annoy her.

Gareth: No. When you said you were an evil necromancer.

A-dom: Oh. Yes. This is true.

Jade’s Luck: So you’re a fluffy, puppy necromancer? Is this what I’m getting?

A-dom: If the puppy is fresh enough.

Jade’s Luck: Like the one you stepped on?

A-dom: Yeah, well, after killing those dragon-bloods and smashing up their house, I was seeing a bit of red, but after you kill about thirty people, you try stopping. It’s really hard. Gotta kill them all.

They eventually got back to the topic at hand, which was giving candy for god. Jade’s Luck expressed a desire to send kids to the city to sell candy to raise money.

A-dom: Yeah, cause that will go well. Dragon-bloods will see them and go ‘Aww how cute! *Squish* No more Unconquered Sun.’

Conversation continued as it does with this group, meandering in strange directions. Jade’s Luck commented that she still needed to hit that necromancer that led her to Exalt.

A-dom: I did. A number of times. That was when he was all chained up and such. Was fun.

Jade’s Luck: Huh?

Gareth: She wasn’t there.

A-dom: Oh yeah. I got him for ya.

After a quick discussion about the fluffy, puppy death lord Bodhisattva, Jade’s Luck commented an how the Circle should go and try to find the book of all knowledge. It was funny to listen to her say Underworld Opec wasn’t dark and evil, but just really nice when A-dom had just used something very similar to describe the Bodhisattva. She went on to talk about the book and how it was really smart and could even talk.

Gareth: Probably has a condescending attitude. Cause, you know, things that know everything usually do. Cause they’re all with the knowledge and you aren’t. They like to lord it over you. At least, I think that would be the fun part of making an all-knowing book. The condescending attitude. Cause then you key it to only be not condescending to you.

The group wasn’t latching onto the book idea, mostly because they had no clue where to look. Tiger expressed a desire to go and find a Manse. He wasn’t sure exactly how they gave you back essence faster, but knew they did and he wanted one. Taking Jahar’s dad’s manse was very briefly discussed, but discarded. Mostly because Tiger said the only way to keep a manse involved killing the dragon-blood and its family and they weren’t sure how Jahar felt about his father. So, they set about trying to make a magical compass to find a manse. A-dom, Luck, and Tiger went to Opec’s island to ask him some questions about Manse and finding them. Gareth stayed behind and gave children candy. They found out they’d need a perfect crystal as part of a divining device for magical energy. Tiger suggested just going back to Atlantis to buy a crystal. Jade’s Luck suggested picking up Gareth first.

Tiger: Who cares about Gareth? He’s busy spending time handing out candy to children. Do you really want to interrupt that? That’s important work. In bizarro world.

They decided to go back to Hoen-ba instead. Jade’s Luck wanted to find the interpreter guy to go talk to Hoen-ba-ba-den.

Tiger: Oh, uh, I can actually talk to these people now. In their own language.

A-dom: TELL THEM TO STOP EATING THE CANDY!

Tiger: But it’s magic candy...

Talking to Hoen-ba-ba-den, Gareth bartered a nicer hut in exchange for a pure crystal.

He asked A-dom if he would get him some wood for the hut.

A-dom: What’ll you give me?

Gareth: …candy…

A-dom fetched some trees and flared around the villagers. They thought it was neat (ooh, shiny). A couple children tried to roast candy in it. A couple of ladies tried to bake some dough near him. They were disappointed when it didn’t work. A couple more asked him if he could come by in a couple weeks for a festival at night, to save then on bonfire expenses. Some more women held up laundry to dry by him.

A-dom: This is a power granted to me by my god, goddamn it! I am not a light source!

Gareth: umm, actually…

A-dom grabbed some corral out of the sea to use for the fireplace. With his newfound architecture knowledge, Gareth whipped up a perfect excellent hut in thirty hours. He glowed a lot. Villagers thought it was neat. The hut ended up having a waterfall, rock garden, koi pond, guest rooms, two levels, and a fireplace with smokestack. Hoen-ba-ba-den really liked it, so gave him two crystals. Gareth gave one crystal to Jade’s Luck and one to A-dom.

Jade’s Luck decided to try and tie the crystal onto her hair without detaching it from her head. A-dom distracted a kid with candy while Tiger lopped of a chunk of hair discretely. A-dom made a very good divining crystal (he got the long range special edition). Jade’s Luck’s was kinda sad in comparison.

They got on the boat and followed A-dom’s crystal. After three or four days, they got to a large island (several hundred miles) covered in dark rain clouds. They sailed around the island and found three settlements along the coastline. One of them was large enough to be called a town. A-dom’s and Luck’s crystals both pointed towards the center of the island, which was between two volcanoes. They sunk the anchor and went ashore at the town.

Random Villager: Hey. How’s it going? Here to trade?

Jade’s Luck: Master Gareth here is a tradesperson. He is excellent at repairing all manner of things.

Random Villager: Do you know how to rainproof huts?

Gareth: Sure.

Tiger: Does it ever stop raining here?

Random Villager: Last time it stopped raining was twelve years ago. It stopped for an afternoon.

Some people thought it had rained for fifty years, but most people didn’t know. When asked why, the random villager responded cause he thought the rain gods hated them.

A-dom: You know what they need here? Sun!

Gareth: Sure.

A-dom: But no candy. No candy is needed here. Do you need candy?

Random Villager: Uhh… No?

A-dom: See. No candy.

Gareth went off to discuss his rates. It was pretty simple. They had jade and were willing to pay.

A-dom, Tiger, and Luck went off to the inn to pass the time. It was cold, muddy, and rain was leaking through the roof in several places.

Tiger: (shouted out the door) GARETH! COULD YOU GET THIS ONE FIRST?

Another Random Villager: (whimpering) No. He’s fixing my roof first. I am so sick of the rain…

Tiger: (shouted out the door) Well, then go faster!

The trio asked if dragon-bloods came around to help them with problems and the villagers responded no. A-dom ordered a beer. It was watered down.

Inn Patron: The dragon-bloods used to come around, but they haven’t been by since the demons took over.

A-dom: An Athema? Two Athemas? Multiple Athemas?

Inn Patron: I don’t know. They come and they take our money and punch holes in our roofs. Pale white face with demon marks on the forehead in blood. Circle with a dot in the middle.

Tiger: Did they have names?

Inn Patron: Yeah. We were supposed to memorize it. I forgot. I’m old.

Turns out the demons killed the local dragon-blood. The trio tried hard to look sad about that. Well, maybe they did.

Tiger asked the innkeeper and he said the one that comes to the town to collect tribute was The Porpoising Worm of Hate. The demons worshipped the dark ones from the great beyond or something. He said he’d be by in a couple of days. He wore black armor.

Tiger: Has anyone resisted?

Inn Keeper: Yeah. There used to be a village about twenty miles inland. They ate it.

A-dom: SWEET! A whole village? Wow! They must have really great . Why do we need to wait for them. They don’t bring their neat with them. Lets go to them.

They waited around town for a couple of days. Gareth repaired all of the roofs and, in his spare time, made A-dom a Perfect Excellent Club. Even put a spike in it for him. A-dom wasn’t impressed.

Gareth: I thought you’d like it better than a sword. You favor your club.

A-dom: That’s cause I have a magical club. If I had magical poop, I’d favor the poop.

Gareth: So, how are you guys planning on attacking this guy?

A-dom: With a wall.

Gareth: Do you want me to fashion you a wall?

A-dom: Yes.

Unfortunately, Gareth lacked the supplies to do that at this time.

When The Porpoising Worm of Hate came to town, Gareth was on top of a house, repairing it. Tiger had set out on another rooftop to keep watch. When Porpoise boy walked by, Gareth leapt off the roof, clad in his armor and armed with his sword.

Gareth: YARR! (squishy thud)

Sadly, Gareth landed face first in the mud behind Mr. Porpoise. Battle was entered by the others. Jade’s Luck yelled something along the lines of Your reign of terror is at an end! Mr. Porpoise sucked some life out of everyone in the area. All the extras in the town died, leaving one heroic mortal. A four on one fight was hardly fair, so Mr. Porpoise was quickly dispatched. Jade’s Luck incinerated the body to make sure it couldn’t come back. This annoyed A-dom cause he didn’t get the armor off first.

Jade’s Luck: GUYS! It’s safe to come… out… now… oh.

Everyone in town was fallen over where they stood. They found the sole surviving townsperson, a little old lady, in the Inn drinking heavily. Gareth had his caste mark glowing.

Little Old Lady: Are you a demon too?

Gareth: I’m not a demon, I’m a good guy.

Jade’s Luck: We killed the demon. Unfortunately he killed everyone in town. Sorry.

Gareth: On the plus side, he didn’t wreck any of the roofs.

Tiger: And he won’t be taking anymore of your money.

Little Old Lady: (dripping sarcasm) Oh joy.

They asked how she’d feel about moving to Hoen-ba island, where all the people were nice and had coconuts.

Little Old Lady: Yes. Somewhere different would be nice. Cause everyone here is DEAD.

Jade’s Luck set about laying the bodies out respectably so they could be buried. The little old lady went around to the various houses, collecting stuff and putting it with the bodies.

Little Old Lady: You’re much nicer demons than the other ones.

A number of graves got dug eventually, since the dead don’t like mass graves.

A couple of days later, they set off towards the center of the island. The little old lady tagged along. She said she was going to head towards another village.

Little Old Lady: I figure if you’re going that way, I might as well have the demons, I mean nice people, accompany me as far as I go.

They talked to her about their god while they walked. Jade’s Luck said the Unconquered Sun was the opposite of rain. The little old lady said she liked him, then. They traveled through a dense, thick jungle. There were an abnormal amount of dangerous and carnivorous plants in the area. The Circle wanted to turn back and sail around. The little old lady was crotchety and went on. The Circle followed her. Gareth activated Touch of Blissful Release on her. She felt much better. He applied it as needed to keep her feeling okay.

Gareth: This would be a great place for Jahar to practice Death of Obsidian Butterflies.

After walking for three days, they got to a split in the path. After discussing, the little old lady decided to show them to the big building between the volcanoes, which seemed like where the Circle wanted to go.

As they approached the building, Tiger decided he wanted to be sneaky and move through the jungle to get a better look. A man-eating plant tried to eat Tiger. He dodged out of the way and made some salad. Thus, he decided the path was a good idea.

Little Old Lady: So, are you going in or what?

A-dom: Boy you’re a pushy old broad.

Little Old Lady: Don’t have long to live.

A-dom: How long?

Jade’s Luck: A-dom. Stop being a bastard.

*Old Lady thwacks A-dom with her stick*

A-dom: (takes one bashing) Oww! Cut that out, old lady! (pause) I can stand here longer than you!

Gareth left A-dom to his verbal fight with the old lady and went up to the door. He didn’t think A-dom would actually hit her. Well, Jade’s Luck and Tiger should stop him if he tried, at least. The door was a big, stone gargoyle with closed eyes and a lot of arms.

Gareth: Hey. I’d like in.

Gargoyle: (pops open an eye) And who (pause) are you?

Gareth: Gareth.

Gargoyle: (little tiny pair of arms popped out of the door and pulled out a list) No. No no. I don’t see a Gareth on the list.

Gareth: Do you like candy?

Gargoyle: Um, I’m a gargoyle. No.

Gareth: Rock candy?

Gargoyle: Funny, but no.

Gareth: Do you like jade?

Gargoyle: Jade is kinda tasty, but not needed.

Gareth: Is Evening Tide of Autumn on the list?

Gargoyle: Yes. Yes she is. Is she here?

Gareth: Kind of.

Gargoyle: You’re not her.

Gareth: Kind of.

Gargoyle: You’re not her.

Tiger: Wasn’t Evening Tide of Autumn a man?

Gargoyle: Yes. You’re not him. If you were him, you’d have his stuff.

*Gareth summons his sword and armor*

Gargoyle: Oh. You’ve got some of his stuff. Doesn’t mean you’re him. If you were him, you’d have all of his stuff.

The conversation went on like this for a while. When asked what else EtoA had, the gargoyle refused to divulge the information. A-dom tried to be crafty. The gargoyle asked him if he was Pieter. When A-dom said yes, the gargoyle tried to stab him. Gareth’s caste mark flared and he dove in between the two of them. The gargoyle failed to harm Gareth. A confused A-dom moved away from the door.

A-dom: I didn’t know you could do that?

Gareth: Now you do.

Gargoyle: (to A-dom) The gargoyles union has lists for you too. You bastard.

A-dom: Is A-dom on there?

Gargoyle: No. No A–dom. We’ll use that as an alias for Pieter.

A-dom: Good. Yeah. Make sure you write that down. And make sure you put Jade’s Luck on there too.

The gargoyle wouldn’t.

Gareth: What has Piter done?

Gargoyle: Well, you see. There was this incident with a gargoyle guarding a door, and obsidian butterflies in a ten foot by ten-foot square room. He killed a gargoyle this way. And the gargoyles union will not tolerate this.

Gareth: He can’t cast, well he can cast magic, but he can’t cast that kind of magic.

Gargoyle: Well no. Pieter didn’t cast it, he talked someone into casting it. He was a crafty, evil bastard.

Jade’s Luck: He’s not really a crafty, evil bastard, he’s just a bastard.

Tiger: He’s evil.

Jade’s Luck: Well, yeah. He’s an evil bastard. But he’s really not that smart. He couldn’t talk Jahar into doing that.

Gargoyle: People who cast obsidian butterflies on ten by ten foot rooms aren’t that smart either. It’s him. Well, none of you are on my list, none of you know the magic word, so go away.

Circle in near unison: There is a magic word?

Gargoyle: Damn it!

They found out Wretch of Winter was on the ‘Do Not Admit’ list. The Gargoyle used that as an alias for Pieter. Gareth figured out to try and use please. Tiger figured out to say it in Hoen-ba dialect. The gargoyle had to let them in.

The inside was kind of dusty and went along as a large corridor for a while until it ended at some large doors.

A-dom: So, we built this? You built this?

Gareth: Probably.

A-dom: Why?

Gareth: Isn’t it neat?

Gareth pushed open the big doors to reveal a large (100ft square) room with a doohickey hanging from the ceiling and some sort of symbol on the ground that was covered in some sort of black and purple moss that looked like it was oozing blood (smelled like vile blood). The doohickey was about ten feet off the ground. The lever hanging at the bottom contained rocks. The one not at the bottom but hanging lower had water in it. The other three appeared to be empty.

There were design frescos on the wall, but they were all blackened and tarred to the point of not being able to read them. Gareth was put on top of A-dom’s head to look at the device. He worked on trying to figure out how it worked. He disconnected the silver bowl on the red beam and took it with him to fill it with fire.

They continued on down through the West doors into another corridor. After going downhill a little, they heard the sloshing of footsteps in water and a little humming. They sent the old lady back to the chamber for her safety.

They went forward and met a large, nice Water Elemental. Jade’s Luck talked to it. It really liked rain (and making it). She was unable to convince it to make it stop raining. They went further down the corridor and it went towards the chamber. They found a couple of soggy side rooms and some stairs down. The stairs led into a large cave-like area that was about four feet deep in water. In the center of the cavern was a diagram that Tiger identified as a binding circle for an elemental (probably water). Tiger said all they’d have to do is push the Elemental into the circle for it to work again.

They went back to the chamber with the doohickey to find the Water Elemental scrubbing the floor.

Water Elemental: Scrubby Scrubby Scrubby!

Jade’s Luck suggested that the walls were dirty too. The Water Elemental scrubbed the walls too, which weren’t as sturdy as the floor. The floor design was the symbol of the five dragons. The stuff on the walls talked about being good worshippers and attending church, worshipping the Sun, and how to grow crops.

The Water Elemental said it didn’t like the circle, cause it wasn’t comfy. It liked being out, where it could come out and clean everything. It blamed Earth for the goo on the floor. It said it got rid of Fire. Fire bad.

The little old lady was doing a good job of staying in the corner opposite the Water Elemental. A-dom got the Water Elemental to make it rain inside. Bad A-dom. She asked everyone but the Elemental go behind a stone door. Then she activated Terrifying Apparition of Glory and ordered the Elemental to go back and sit in his circle. The Water Elemental cried all the way back to the circle. Jade’s Luck felt bad.

 

[Ao the Overkitty]

Synopsis of 11/11/05 mini-session - "Jahar is the Hoen-ba word for plant food"

Synopsis of 11/11/05 mini-session

"Jahar is the Hoen-ba word for plant food"

After a week on Hoen-Ba Island, Tiger and Gareth went back to Atlantis to collect Jahar. He brought along A-dom’s armor and weapon, but didn’t bother to tell A-dom this. Jahar then spent the next month or so secreted within the hold of the ship, reading. No one noticed him. Clearly he had learned Vanish from Mind’s Eye or something.

Jahar woke up on the ship and heard rain outside. He found the ship was parked offshore from an island where it was pouring rain. He found a couple canoes missing, but not all of them.

Jahar: Skelly, where did they go?

*Skelly points*

Jahar looked to land to see if he could see any people. He saw the canoes, but no people.

Jahar: Skelly, do you know how to row?

*Skelly nods*

Jahar: Skelly, if you row me to shore, could you row back to the boat?

*Skelly shrugs*

Jahar: Skelly, go get your bucket?

He grabbed A-dom’s club and armor and waited for Skelly. When Skelly returned with his barrel, they put it in the canoe and rowed to shore. Once there, Jahar had Skelly get in his barrel and closed the lid. When he heard the clicking of Skelly twiddling his thumbs, Jahar told him to be quiet. Skelly twiddled his thumbs slower.

Jahar walked through town and found a black smear on the ground. It was kind of slimy and dusty and reminded him of when Jade’s Luck ashes a body, but gooier. He found shoddy houses with nice roofs.

Jahar: Gareth has been here.

The tavern still had mugs on tables, partially filled with water. Behind the bar, he found a stack where there used to be kegs, but only one remained.

Eventually, he found the burial ground, where there were thirty freshly dug graves.

Jahar: (shakes head) A-dom…

He found the only path leading inland, which was somewhat recently plowed up by travel. He followed the path for two miles, then got bored. He called upon immense power and unseen forces to turn himself into a flock of swallows and flew up. He found that he was in a densely packed jungle, there were two volcanoes and a lot of clouds and it was incredibly rainy.

Jahar then looked around a little to try and find the path he was on. When he thought he had found it, he landed and reformed into Jahar. He had the leather armor wrapped around the club and dragged the tip of the club in the mud behind him.

While walking along, a whole bunch of vines lashed out and grabbed hold of him. He dropped the club and armor and unsuccessfully tried to get away. As the vines dragged him towards a large flower, he drew his sword and pitifully swiped at vines. As he was dragged towards the flower, it leaned forward and spewed pollen at him. Jahar held his breath. He freed himself and slammed into the ground. As more vines came at him, he fled into the jungle.

He was now completely off the path, but he was moving faster now that he didn’t have the extra weight. Jahar wandered around the jungle trying to find the path again. He managed to not step on the giant centipede. In an effort to get a feel for the essence flows of the island, he pulled out his thing on a string and it went horizontal. Jahar went in that direction.

Unfortunately, Jahar wasn’t doing a good job of paying attention to his surroundings today. One second, he was walking along and the next second he was inside something. He was pretty sure his legs were outside of whatever he was in and it was trying to bite him off at the abdomen. It was doing a decent job of that, too. He slashed at the plant till it dropped him, then ran away. When he stopped, he noticed he was near another of those plants, but this one came pre-cut up. Through investigation, he found it had been done in one swipe and was done with a poisoned sword.

In a ‘restful’ spot, Jahar now flared up his anima to scare away the plants and make himself visible to the rest of the circle (unfortunately, they were inside a building at this time). He then made himself really loud.

Jahar: (shouting) I wouldn’t mind a bit of help here.

Within the building, both A-dom and Gareth heard Jahar.

A-dom: Damn it, it’s Jahar. He’s probably deep inside a plant by now.

Jahar: (shouting) These plants keep attacking me.

Gareth: I suppose we should go get him.

The two of them discussed A-dom’s chances of being able to get out and back in and what the gargoyle would like to do to him.

Gargoyle: I can hear you, you know.

Gareth: So, would you prefer that I get him out or that he just starved to death in here?

Gargoyle: Get him out of here.

A-dom: I’m going to come back, you know.

Gargoyle: Then I can stab you again.

Gareth: No, you really can’t. You’ll just be stabbing me. And is there really a point to that?

*Gargoyle makes sounds like he is sharpening his spear*

A-dom: You’re a grumpy golem.

Gareth: Gargoyle

A-dom: Gargoyle. Whatever.

Gareth: Don’t annoy him more.

A-dom: Do you have a name?

Gargoyle: Course I have a name. Idiot.

A-dom: Nice to meet you, Idiot. (to Gareth) Shall we go rescue city boy?

The two exited.

A-dom: (to the Gargoyle) Thanks for letting us out. We’ll be back in a few minutes, Idiot.

*Eight hands flip A-dom off*

Gareth: You just have to provoke, don’t you?

A-dom: That’s his name.

Gareth: No, its not. He was calling you an idiot and you know it. (to Gargoyle) What’s your name?

Gargoyle: Ralph

Jahar: (shouting)Still waiting.

A-dom: Maybe we should go back to the town first. Just to be sure.

It wasn’t hard to spot Jahar. He was a huge bonfire about twenty feet off the path, forty feet from the building. A-dom flared his anima at him.

Gareth: (yelling) Why the hell did you go off the path, you idiot?

Jahar started walking in their direction.

A-dom: Don’t you have a rock on a stick?

Jahar: It’s a string and mine is in the middle of a plant now. Oh yeah, your club and armor are back on the path. I couldn’t find the path again, so…

A-dom: At least it is on the path and not in the middle of the jungle, never to be seen again.

Jahar was whiny about being hurt while he investigated Ralph. Eventually, an eye opened up, then closed again.

Ralph: Oh great, another one.

Jahar wasn’t on the list. Neither was Lightbringer, surprisingly.

Jahar: How did you get here?

Gareth: Took a boat.

A-dom: I have a stone on a string.

Jahar: How the hell did you get one of those?

A-dom: I made it.

Jahar: You’ve been listening to me too much.

A-dom: I figured it out. When you asked me for the virgin’s hair. And the crystal… We built a really big hut.

Jahar decided he’d rather investigate the garden he was in. He noticed it was a binding circle with a lot of sod and grass.

Jahar: Is this thing keeping you here?

Ralph: No. Of course not. I’m a gargoyle.

He asked what was in the circle. Ralph said that there used to be a wood elemental in there, but he got let out. The dark guys decided it would be funny to stick a demon in there instead. Jahar asked if the demon had a name. Ralph said the demon didn’t. Then Ralph whacked the ground with his spear. An eyestalk came out of the ground and looked around.

Ralph: Do you have a name?

*Eyestalk shakes*

Ralph: See. No name.

Jahar inspected the circle and talked about destroying the demon sometime. The forest moved closer, as if to protect the circle.

Jahar: What dark guys?

A-dom: Oh, there are some of those guys here.. uh. Death lords.

Gareth: Death knights.

A-dom: Yeah. Them. We killed the porpoise.

Jahar: Oh. And A-dom. Why did you kill all those people in the town?

A-dom: That wasn’t me! That was the porpoise. He yelled really loud. Everyone got hurt. The rest of them pretty much died except the old lady inside.

Jahar: Do you want to go get your club? As I think Gareth wants to go inside and the forest getting closer is starting to scare me a little.

A-dom: I vote for club.

Jahar was whiny some more about being hurt. Gareth used Touch of Blissful Release. Jahar felt better and was his usual spacey self. Maybe a bit more so.

Gareth: I’ve been medicating the old lady too. She likes it.

Jahar: Old lady?

A-dom: We rescued an old lady. She apparently, actually, I don’t know why she didn’t die.

Gareth: She is definitely worthy of exaltation.

Jahar: Well, if she exalts, we can have her first. (long pause) for our society.

A-dom: So, how’d you find us anyway?

Jahar: Skelly told me.

A-dom: He talked?

Jahar: He tipped his hat and pointed.

A-dom: Ah. Good. Cause, if he started talking, I’d be freaked.

Jahar: He’s on the beach. (pause) In his bucket. I needed to get to land somehow.

A-dom: You don’t know how to row? Do you know how to follow a path?

Jahar: I did follow the path. Plants chased me off it.

Gareth went back inside and told Tiger they were going to go get A-dom’s stuff off the path. Then the trio spent over a day wandering back up the path.

Jahar: Why is it raining here?

Gareth: The Water Elemental makes the rain.

Jahar: Do I get to meet him?

Gareth: If you want. You’ll have to go down to the circle to talk to him now. Jade’s Luck made him go back in. But, anyway, we’re here cause Tiger wanted a manse. They briefly discussed killing your father, but we didn’t know how you’d feel about that.

Jahar: I’ve been looking for a manse for months. How did you find one?

Gareth: A-dom has a rock on a string. It’s a really good rock on a string. Hoen-ba island.

Jahar: It led you here from there?

A-dom: Yeah. It’s a really good rock on a string. Maybe you wrapped yours wrong.

Gareth: He did a lot better than Jade’s Luck. She decided she didn’t want to cut off her own hair, so she just tied it into her hair.

Jahar: Jade’s Luck is a virgin?

A-dom: She is a whore reject, my friend.

Gareth: It works. Nowhere near as well as A-dom’s. It started working about forty feet from the building. (pause) So, we came here. Oh, and Hoen-ba-ba-den now has a really nice hut. We needed the crystals and she had them, so I bartered with her and she wanted a new hut. So I made her a nice little hut. It has a koi pond, rock garden, waterfall, two levels, fireplace, guestrooms.

A-dom: Monkey butler.

Gareth: No. No monkey. She’d have to go find one of those. But it looked really nice. She gave us two crystals for it. Oh, we’ve got three followers now. She’s a little young, but she’ll grow into it.

A-dom: And what were you giving our followers?

Gareth: Oh, yeah. We actually came up with part of the religion. It revolves around candy.

Jahar: I’m not too sure about that one.

A-dom: Thank you.

*Gareth hands Jahar a piece of candy. Jahar doesn’t take it*

Gareth: The Unconquered Sun rewards good worshippers with candy.

Jahar: The Unconquered Sun rewards good worshippers with NO RAIN!

Gareth: We’re working on that.

A-dom: Yeah, see, I’m worried the children are going to come back very round and the parents are going to get upset and then we won’t have ANY followers.

Jahar: I’m surprised you wouldn’t just kill the parents.

Gareth: Don’t give him any ideas.

A-dom: That doesn’t sound very religiously.

Jahar: Did Jade’s Luck try to kill you yet?

A-dom: That’s a daily thing.

Gareth: You know how those two are. Bicker. Bicker. Bicker. Jade’s Luck is convinced they were sisters in a former life. She didn’t like it when I reminded her she was naughty sometimes.

A-dom: Yeah. Apparently, when I was a little girl, she was all evil and stuff.

A-dom asked Jahar about what his wife knew about him and such. Jahar didn’t know.

Jahar: Oh. By the way. There is a series of plants with vines near your club.

A-dom: Oh. okay.

When they got to where Jahar thought he dropped the club, it didn’t look the same. Jahar cast his spell again and turned into a flock of sparrows. He found a separate path nearby that he thought was where the club was. A-dom flared to let Jahar know where to land. He landed and reformed as Jahar.

After being told where the path was, Gareth drew his sword and told them to stay a bit behind him. He took out his sword and flared into a bonfire. The runes on his sword jumped off the sword and danced around, cutting up all the plant life around him. Lots of salad. He then walked through the forest at A-dom and Jahar’s directions. It took them several hours, but they eventually found the other path. A bit later, they found the club and armor. Vines tried to grab him, but they were quickly chopped up too.

A-dom did a little ‘I found my stuff’ dance.

 

[Ao the Overkitty]

Synopsis of 11/14/05 session - "Extreme Home Makeover – Manse Edition"

Synopsis of 11/14/05 session

"Extreme Home Makeover – Manse Edition"

Jade’s Luck and Tiger went outside because she wanted to learn monkey leap in the clearing. But, when they got out there, they found it gone.

Tiger: Did we heal the wood elemental without realizing it?

Ralph: Uhh, no. They wandered over yesterday after that guy, Wejin, threatened the demon.

Jade’s Luck: Do you know why it wandered over?

Ralph: I think the demon made it.

Jade’s Luck proceeded to insult Ralph by calling him a door.

Jade’s Luck spent the two days the trio were gone bouncing around the large room with the doohickey. Tiger spent that time getting friendly with the water elemental (his words, not mine).

Once they got back (carrying exceptional umbrellas), A-dom noticed that all the plants in the clearing were poisonous or man-eating or aggressive in some shape or form. Gareth’s idea of just mowing them down with his cuisinart sword were dampened by the pollen that would be kicked into the air. He didn’t feel like dealing with tactile poisons or delivering nasty things to the villagers downwind. A torrential downpour might do the trick, though.

A-dom: You’re going to want to avoid the area of Death! That one is poisonous, that one shoots barbs, and that one, I think Jahar knows intimately.

It took a little convincing to get Jahar to not Obsidian Butterfly the clearing (and possibly Ralph). Instead, they just made their way around the clearing to the door. Ralph denied A-dom’s positive actions in preventing the butterflies.

A-dom: So, what do gargoyles like, anyway?

Ralph: Keys. Passwords. Riddles. Occasionally getting to stab people to death; that’s fun. Kittens.

A-dom: What are you going to do with a kitten?

Ralph: Pet it and call it George.

Jahar: Do all gargoyles like kittens?

Ralph: No. What kind of a stupid question is that? Do all Solars like necromancy?

A-dom: Yes… umm… (pause) No. No!

Ralph then proceeded to confuse them by trying to explain what Gargoylesevania is like. He said he’d need a patch of pure Wyld to truly show us what it was like.

Gareth got bored and asked Ralph to let him in. Jahar continued to stand around questioning Ralph.

Gareth: You’d better get in here before the door closes, cause you can’t say it.

This hastened Jahar to move along. Once in the doohickey room, they found Jade’s Luck bouncing around the room.

Gareth: A-dom is now armed and armored.

*A-dom growls and roars dramatically*

Gareth: (to Jahar) Mind the vile moss. Now, this over here is.. uh, what is your name?

Old Lady: Cindy.

Jahar, of course, was intently staring at the blood moss and ignoring the rest of the Circle. Jade’s Luck got his attention by yelling in his ear. She then questioned him about Squishy, since she felt bad about sticking him back in his circle.

Jahar: If someone put YOU in a barrel, and you weren’t a skeleton, would you like it?

Jade’s Luck: Oh, so THAT is where he is hiding! Thank you.

A-dom: Damn it, Jahar!

Tiger bound a pact between A-dom and Jade’s Luck that Jade’s Luck couldn’t kill Skelly if A-dom got her a muffin. They probably would have liked it better if he had done it with their consent.

Jahar: A-dom, can I borrow your rock thingy?

A-dom: If you give me a muffin.

Jahar held the rock on a string and it started spinning around wildy.

A-dom: We’re in the center of a magic building, dumbass.

Jahar felt non-Creation energies coming from the East and the South and a complete lack of energies coming from the North. There was Creation energies in the West and from below. He told Luck that he was going to go have a conversation with Squishy, and then promptly walked back to Ralph.

When Jahar eventually got to Squishy, the conversation consisted of Squishy saying RAIN!!! and Scrubby Scrubby a lot. They did manage to get out of him that he let Air out of his circle. Someone let Squishy out a long time ago. They also found out that he now had orders to make it rain. Before he had orders not to. He didn’t know what happened to Wood, because Ralph wouldn’t let him go out. He got rid of Fire because he made Squishy boil with anger.

Jade’s Luck tried to expedite matters by dunking Jahar under the water to get him to look at the binding circle. Squishy got the bright idea to make the water swirl around in a vortex. This dragged Jade’s Luck underwater too.

Back up in the doohickey room, A-dom broke out the keg and mugs he swiped from the inn back in town. A-dom, Tiger, Gareth, and Cindy proceeded to drink heavily and sing.

Jade’s Luck managed to get her head back to the surface and yell at Squishy to stop. When Jahar got a good look at the circle, he found that Squishy was partially powering the Manse. He explained to Jade’s Luck (away from Squishy) that Squishy didn’t have a whole lot of self awareness and or actual feelings and that he needed to stay in the circle. She told him that the Fire Elemental area was filled with water. They went back to Squishy and asked him if he was keeping the water inside the Fire Elemental room. He said he had only filled it. When she asked him if they could just poke a hole in it to let it drain, he got a terrified look on his face and told them they didn’t want to do that. When asked why, he didn’t know, and told them to just go talk to Rocky.

They eventually headed back up to the doohickey room to find the others drinking and singing. Cindy was rather drunk by now. Jade’s Luck tried to convince Gareth to make a bucket to hold some water, but he told her he didn’t have the materials. An argument ensued about procuring the materials from the forest, which A-dom refused to do.

Jade’s Luck: You don’t have a problem being told to go fight with stuff when it’s a six year old child.

A-dom: Yeah, but a six year old child doesn't explode into poisonous gas.

After a lengthy discussion about mountain building, they headed down to go speak to Rocky. Gareth put together some bedding for Cindy so she could sleep it off. While going through a lengthy corridor, they came to a large, stone door on the east side of the hallway. Inside was a long dining room with a big double table. There were a whole bunch of ghosts sitting around and a guy sitting at the other end. He was a pale-faced man with black hair and was holding a muffin in his hand.

A-dom: Can I buy that muffin from you?

Muffin Man: Who the hell are you?

A-dom: We’re Adventurers!

Muffin Man: Get rid of them!

*Ghosts all stand*

A-dom: Can I have a muffin?

Muffin Man: No!

A-dom: (quietly) Please?

Big battle ensued. The Muffin Man escaped through a back door while the Circle dealt with the ghosts. A-dom smashed ghosts with the table, which had the unfortunate affect of destroying the muffins on it. Jahar did a leg-sweep, taking Gareth down. Most of the ghosts dematerialized once Gareth went into ginsu mode. Tiger ran along the wall and on top of ghosts’ heads to follow behind the Muffin Man.

Tiger found a smaller room beyond this one. Inside along one wall was a smaller door that started about waist high on one wall and a larger, normal door along another. When A-dom came in right behind Tiger, Tiger told him to take the larger door while he took the smaller one. A-dom smashed through the door, splintering it. Water started spraying from some pipes immediately after he smashed the door to the pantry. Water was getting all over the flour, so A-dom crimped the pipe to stop the water. Tiger dove into the small hole in the wall and started climbing down. He found a rope going down the center of the hole and a box farther down. Jade’s Luck entered the room and yelled at A-dom for the piping. Gareth entered the room and thought what A-dom was doing was okay, so he dived down the hole in the wall. Jahar entered the room and told A-dom to stop or he’d blow up the Manse.

In the dumbwaiter shaft, Tiger looked up to see Gareth filling up the shaft above him and rapidly approaching. He flattened himself against the wall. As Gareth went scraping by, Tiger was wedged between him and the wall, scraping him along a little. Gareth was much too heavy for the roof of the dumbwaiter. When Gareth came to a stop at the bottom, he was wearing a wooden dumbwaiter like a shirt, wedged underneath his armpits. Gareth wiggled down out of dumbwaiter, making more cracking and crunching sounds.

Jahar: Stop that before we all die!

Gareth: I found the hole.

Jahar: I think you made the hole!

Gareth found himself in a large cavern with a couple of doorways going off in various directions. There were also a bunch of monkeys walking around.

Gareth: I found monkeys!

One of the monkeys walked up to Gareth. He offered it candy. The monkey took the candy.

Head Monkey: Thank you. Do you want something?

When questioned, the monkey told them there were no more muffins, that another guy did just come down there, and which way he went.

Gareth: Get down here quickly!

As Gareth and Tiger went after the guy, Jahar carefully went down the dumbwaiter, making sure not to break anything. Jade’s Luck also went down carefully. A-dom, however, took the Gareth approach to getting down.

*CRUNCH! *

Jahar bitched some more at A-dom. They ran after Gareth and Tiger. Luckily for them, Gareth is slow enough that they would catch up. Gareth and Tiger came to an intersection, where one path led back up and another led down. They chose down.

The others caught up as they ran down this tunnel. The tunnel went up again and down and squiggled, but mostly went south until they reached water. The room looked like Squishy’s, but it was filled to the top inch with water. The water itself was a placid, foul blackish green. Jahar picked up a rock and chucked it in the water.

A-dom: Hello Mr. Demon come out.

*Strange bubbling/hissing noise comes from the water*

Tiger: I’m pretty sure that was demonic.

While Water Elemental sounded like a weird amalgamation of Sea tongue and Old Realm, this sounded like a foul bastardization of High Realm that just sounded like a long string of curses.

Jade’s Luck: Wash your mouth out with soap!

Tiger stuck his head in the water and saw a red, fiery guy sitting in a binding circle.

Tiger: I’ll help you out of this. Have you seen anyone else come down?

Fire Demon: No. Letmeoutletmeoutletmeout.

Tiger: I need to talk to my friends to figure out how to get the water out for you.

Fire Demon: Break the circle.

A-dom: Do you have candy?

Fire Demon: Nooooooooo.

A-dom: Okay. We’re not going to break the circle if you don’t have candy.

Fire Demon: I’ve got candy.

A-dom: Yeah, that’s what I thought. (to Circle) That’s a demon.

They backtracked to the intersection and went the other way. It led back up some stairs to an intersection with a hallway they had been in before. They raced back to the doohickey too to check on the little old lady. Gareth ran over to Ralph and found out the Muffin Man had run outside. Apparently the Muffin Man was a recent addition to the list. This annoyed A-dom. Gareth, A-dom and Tiger ran the way the guy had gone while Jahar and Jade’s Luck discussed. They found the guy’s path, which ended in a giant gopher hole. After fetching the other two, Jahar figured out that the guy had burrowed through the Earth to get away. Must have been the Porposing Worm of Hate.

Jade’s Luck: Hmm.. If we got Squishy to make it rain really hard for about half an hour…

Jahar: We need subjects, not water zombies. We’re not going to catch him. Lets go inside.

Back in the monkey room, three monkeys were huddled around the dumbwaiter trying to fix it.

Talking with the talking monkey, they found out his name was Jeeves. This amused A-dom and he asked Jeeves if he knew how to make more of himself. Jeeves responded with pelvic thrusts. They explored the storage rooms before going on to talk to Rocky.

They found another water filled cavern down a hallway. Jahar stuck his head in to see a pile of mud within a binding circle.

Jahar: Are you happy like that? You don’t look happy.

*Mud grumbles*

Meanwhile, Jade’s Luck was having a conversation with Tiger and A-dom in the background.

Jade’s Luck: I am not a sorcerer!

When Jade’s Luck spoke, the mud stood up in a vaguely human form.

Muddy (gravely voice): Familiar! (pause) You sorcerer! (pause) Contract over! Let me out!

Jade’s Luck: (meekly innocent voice) I’m not a sorcerer. I’m only seventeen.

Jahar: And she’s a virgin.

Muddy: Summoned for year and a day. Been here… *pulls out chalkboard* . Me been here 367,682 days longer than necessary.

Jade’s Luck: (meekly innocent voice) I don’t want to argue with you, but I’m only seventeen. I don’t remember doing any of this. (to Gareth) Do you?

Gareth got a vision of himself, with breasts, talking to a really handsome looking guy named Tellus the Fierce. Tellus was talking about sticking elementals into binding circles to run a magic building that his wife designed. Gareth then said that that was a bad idea.

Gareth: I remember a conversation, well, I had boobs, which was weird, with a guy called Tellus the Fierce, about sticking elementals in binding circles to run a magic building. I thought that was a bad idea.

Jahar found out from Muddy that his job in the Celestial Court was to be an island. If he wasn’t in the circle, he would leave and the island would cease to exist.

A-dom: We want things to be in the circle.

Muddy: (gravely voice) No! Bad!

They left Muddy to go back to the monkey area. Tiger and Gareth stuck around there while A-dom, Jade’s Luck, and Jahar went to check out the Air area. Gareth went around fixing the broken stuff (dumbwaiter, door, water pipe)

At an intersection, the trio found a plaque on the east wall.

The loving home of Tellus the Fierce and Cindy

Jahar got a vision of himself as a very ugly woman (Wejin the Hideous) talking to some guy who was very self righteous and annoying and handsome and always talking about all of the women he could shag.

Jahar: (to Jade’s Luck) There was a time when you liked whores.

Jade’s Luck: I don’t dislike whores.

Jahar: You liked to use them as much as you could.

The plaque did nothing for Jade’s Luck.

Jahar: I don’t remember who Cindy was. You were Tellus the Fierce.

A-dom: I wanna remember stuff..

Jahar: You’d remember being a compassionate little girl..

Jade’s Luck: Did I shag him a lot.

Jahar: You remember how I said Rosewind was a little girl. Well, Tellus was Rosewind’s father.

Jade’s Luck: (hysterical laughter) I’m your daddy! Ha ha!

A-dom: Right… My daddy is back on the island, somewhere.

They continued on until they heard some demon summoning going on upstairs. Jahar recognized it as being the fast and loose, uncontrollable way of summoning.

Jade’s Luck: Umm. That’s bad. We need to go get Gareth and Tiger now.

The chanting stopped and then started again. To Jahar, it sounded like the demons were helping to summon more more quickly. Jade’s Luck ran back while Jahar had A-dom protect him.

Jahar: I need you to protect me from the demons, but don’t get in front of me cause of the butterflies.

When Jade’s Luck was a reasonable distance away, she started yelling for help.

Jade’s Luck: Demons Coming! Demons Coming! Help! Help!

A-dom and Jahar snuck closer to get a closer look at the summoning. They saw a big room with an upright stone circle. There was one guy in purple and four ugly demons (two small, two bigger) dancing around and chanting.

Gareth was the first to hear Jade’s Luck yelling.

Gareth: Hey Tiger. Demons.

The two ran off in her direction.

*Clankity Clankity Clankity Clank*

Gareth: I need to remember to yell at Jade’s Luck about all these stairs.

When Jahar heard the clanking of Gareth’s armor, he began casting. Jahar started to glow as he began sucking huge amounts of energy from the surrounding area. Three demons broke off from the chanting to head towards A-dom and Jahar. Jade’s Luck did some fancy back flips, diving through Jahar’s legs, and chucking her chakram. She also jumped on Jahar’s shoulders and tried to scare the demons.

Jade’s Luck: Cease Your Naughtiness!

Ryan: Cute Puppies Do Not Appreciate This!

The demons botched their summing and created a hole in the building. The raging bonfire that was Gareth dove in front of Jahar to protect him from a poison dart. A second later, a giant octopus with flailing tentacles formed around Jahar as Obsidian Butterflies came over his shoulders. Gareth drew up his sword to block the butterflies from hitting him. As Gareth dropped to the ground, a Golden Bear appeared around him. Jade’s Luck leapt off of Jahar’s shoulders and onto his head to avoid the butterflies. Tiger folded out of the way. When the dust settled, Garath was buried four feet deep beneath the butterflies. The guy was decently hurt and standing waist deep in butterflies. There were a couple of demons standing their seriously hurt. The stone circle was gone, as well as the far wall. Both rooms were filled in obsidian butterflies. There was an image of an obsidian monolith off in the distance behind Jahar giving off the impression of smiling.

The demons dematerialized, leaving the guy along. Jahar ran across the butterflies with his swords drawn, kicking up obsidian butterflies at the guy’s face with the tips of his swords. Gareth luckily took no damage as Jahar ran overtop him. He just worked on digging himself out. The guy glowed darker and darker as he wiggled out of the way of several attacks. Before Tiger dealt the killing blow, the guy was had a Vampire Bat glowing around him.

 

[Ao the Overkitty]

Synopsis of 11/26/05 session - “30 Minute Manse (repairs)”

Synopsis of 11/26/05 session

“30 Minute Manse (repairs)”

As the Circle was standing on top of (well, Gareth was still crawling his way out from underneath) four feet of obsidian butterflies, Essense started flaring off the walls and fires started popping up all over. Monkey Ninjas appeared out of the walls and landed on Jade’s Luck and Tiger. The second was an impressive feet, since Tiger was standing on the ceiling. Still, they’re monkey ninjas; they do that.

Head Monkey Ninja: WHAT ARE YOU TRYING TO DO?

Jade’s Luck: We killed the bad guy.

Head Monkey Ninja: WE’RE ALL GOING TO DROWN!

*Random sputtering from Jade’s Luck and Tiger*

Head Monkey Ninja: ACTUALLY WE’RE ALL GOING TO BLOW UP BEFORE WE DROWN. THIS IS VERY BAD!

Jade’s Luck: How do we fix it? He cast the spell. Maybe he knows.

Head Monkey Ninja: SOMEBODY HAS TO BE THE MASTER!

As Jade’s Luck and Jahar tried to extract more information from the monkey ninjas, the monkeys got very irritated. Apparently the dead Death knight Jade’s Luck was standing on was the former master. And, apparently Tiger killing the guy didn’t automatically make him the master. After a monkey ninja helped Gareth out of the butterflies, Jahar got the ninjas to tell him that becoming the master had something to do with the Master Room. The head monkey ninja instructed them to take the important stuff off the body before pointing them towards the Master Room (he couldn’t get down on the floor because the butterflies would hurt is feet).
They collected a multifaceted-gem that was about an inch and a half in diameter and made out of five materials (Ruby, Sapphire, Diamond, Emerald, & Gold) all fitted together. The other item was a bird egg-shaped stone that was made out of five different colors of Jade (Black, Red, Blue, Green, Ice Blue) all swirled together.

Each member of the Circle started to regain Essense at an enormous rate since it was bleeding out of the walls and soaking into everything. They weren’t sure why, but they knew it couldn’t be a good thing if they absorbed too much Essense.

The Master Room was at the top of the building. It was a large room with clear walls (like big thick glass) so one could observe the areas surrounding the Manse. In the center of the room was an S-shaped loveseat (so a couple could sit and face each other). There was a pedestal on each of the armrests (one was faceted and the other was smooth). Gareth found the chairs were amazing and he couldn’t possibly make something this nice. The chair looked like it was a single polished uncut diamond, but comfy. Tiger and Jahar sat down and tried to attune to the Manse, but couldn’t figure it out.

Head Monkey Ninja: FASTER! WHY CAN’T YOU DO THIS FASTER? WE’RE ALL GOING TO DIE!

Jahar noticed the word Cindy written in Old Realm on the side he was sitting on and Tellus was written on the side Tiger was sitting on. Jahar felt it working, but felt something was wrong. Gareth stood around with nothing to do. He offered to rebuild the wall, but Jahar didn’t think that was a good idea.

Jahar: Jade’s Luck! Sit in Tiger’s chair!

Jade’s Luck sat down in Tiger’s lap. Monkey ninjas slapped their foreheads. Once Tiger got up, Jade’s Luck properly sat in the seat. Jahar got up and let Tiger sit in the spot he had been in. This time, it seemed to work right. The head monkey ninja then started referring to Tiger as Mistress and Jade’s Luck as Master. The group (Circle & monkey ninjas) then all went to talk to Rocky to see how they could fix this. As they ran through the rubble room again, a monkey ninja (Bob) went up in flames. Gareth sent away his armor. Several Circle members started activating charms willy-nilly to burn essense.

Once they got to Rocky’s room, Tiger asked him to tell him how to make the Manse not go boom.

Rocky: Unh-unh. I’ve been stuck here for 367,682 days longer than necessary. And I’m not going to help you unless you get me out of here.

Tiger got Rocky to promise that the island wouldn’t disappear when they let him out of the binding circle and he agreed to let Rocky out. While Tiger waited for Jahar and Jade’s Luck to verify this, Gareth started burning with light and let out a scream of pain. Tiger sanctified the deal and they let Rocky out.

Rocky instructed them on how to summon an Earth Elemental the fast and dangerous way. Jahar, Tiger, Jade’s Luck, and Rocky formed a circle around the binding circle and started summoning. Gareth went outside the room. When a new Earth Elemental splorted into the binding circle, Rocky apologized to him and told the Circle to go to the wood circle.

Tiger and Jade’s Luck, with their lightening speed and monkey leaping, were the first to arrive. Rocky, having passed through the earth, was already waiting for them. Once Gareth got there, he screamed out in pain as his body burst into flames again.

They could all see huge flames of essence were shooting into the building from all four directions, riding up the sides of the building and shooting out the top in a big pillar making a miles high light show. Gareth then pointed out to the others exactly which plants were the binding circle and which were the nasty plants. A short fight ensued where the others squished the demon before Gareth could join the fight.

Rocky, Jahar, and Jade’s Luck then summoned a new Wood Elemental while Gareth wandered inside to check on what he suspected would be Cindy’s remains. The building stopped burning as the new Wood and Earth Elementals repaired the Manse. While Jahar and Gareth wanted to get rid of the Fire demon, they were outvoted by Tiger and Jade’s Luck, because they wanted time to heal and regain willpower. Gareth and Jahar really didn’t like the fact that the other two were now connected to a demon, but couldn’t convince them that time was of the essence. So, they decided to sit around till the second morning to heal and regain willpower. Gareth’s normal damage healed, but the aggravated burns across his body resisted his healing charms. The last time he remember feeling this bad was when he was stabbed by something more powerful than a god.

Gareth: Guys, I really don’t like the fact that the rest of this isn’t healing. Let’s not do that again. No more obsidian butterflies inside the house.

Jahar wandered off to the dining hall to be alone. After Jade’s Luck had healed up, she went off in search of Jahar and muffins to destroy (she didn’t want to destroy Jahar, just the muffins).

Tiger made a note to have muffins made once they had restored the Fire Elemental and cooking staff, as right now, the cooking staff would be demonic cooking monkeys. This would be funny, but dangerous.

After discussing with Jahar, Luck and Tiger set the monkeys to the task of emptying the water from the fire elemental’s room and the wood elemental to the task of making more buckets for the monkey bucket brigade. As Gareth laid down in the doohickey room on the bedding he had put together for Cindy, he watched monkeys walk past with clearly inferior buckets. If he was in less pain, he’d have cared more.

The night before they went to take care of the Fire Elemental, Jahar approached Tiger.

Jahar: I assume you are expecting me to help with this?

Tiger: Might be a good idea. We’re going to need help with the summoning, at least.

Jahar: Then I’m going to have to use sorcery and rest afterwards.

Tiger: Okay.

In the morning, after Jahar had cast Bones of Stone and regained the essence from it, a grumpy Gareth, a slightly sulky Jahar, a peppy Jade’s Luck, and an eager Patient Tiger gathered outside the Fire Elemental room. Tiger took a certain sadistic pleasure in powering up in front of the demon.

Dan: I’ll be making eleven attacks the first round.

Alex: Do I really need to be here?

Paul: It’s possible he might miss and the demon might attack him for you to take the blow.

Alex: Nah, I’ve taken enough damage and he’s really good at dodging. I’m going to leave my sword in its sheath, though.

Tiger blurred in a flurry of blows (punches, kicks, head butts and then sword blows). Amazingly enough, the demon was still standing when he was finished. Jade’s Luck tried to slash an X in the demon’s face with her war fan, but it ended up being more of a Y. The demon attacked Jade’s Luck before Gareth drew his sword and lopped its head off.

Gareth: Okay. Go about your business of summoning. I’m going to go and see about laying down.

One banishing and summoning later.

Fire Elemental: (waves) Hello. Sorry, I’m talking to some monkeys. They apparently want orders. I’m a little confused. Give me a little bit to get used to the job.

Jahar wandered off to find the Air Elemental place. Once he got there, he sat down and waited for the others. Jade’s Luck wandered back to talk to Ralph and get him to take all of the Porposing Worms off the list. She then dragged Gareth (probably not literally, since he can way a ton when he wants to) off to find the Air Elemental circle with Tiger. They found Jahar outside on a big deck with a nice view and railings all around and a hole in the deck, which Jahar was looking at.

Jade’s Luck: Hey, what’s that?

Jahar: It’s a hole.

Jade’s Luck: Well, why are you looking at it?

It was a wooden circle with lots of runes around it and a big crack through it on one side (don’t ask me how a circle has sides). Jade’s Luck tried to get Wood to fix it, but he couldn’t. Strange how Elementals don’t know how to make Elemental Binding Circles.

Tiger: So, we need to wait to summon an air elemental until after Gareth can fix the circle.

Gareth: Umm. I’m not Magical Mojo Boy. I don’t know how to fix this.

Tiger: I know, but you’re Mr. Fix It, so I figure it will take a combination of the two of you.

Jahar: I know how it can be fixed.

Jade’s Luck: So you’re good on the theory but light on the actual know-how.

Tiger: He has the know how, just not the ability. I think that’s what he is trying to say.

Tiger then proceeded to change the subject, ignoring Jahar.

Tiger: So, who was the guy we killed [on the second floor]?

Gareth: Don’t know. We killed the Porposing Worm of Hate. The Porposing Worm of Vengeance got away. Lets call the third one The Porposing Worm of Lust.

Paul: I don’t even want to think about the Porposing Worm of Lust.

Liz: Too late.

Jade’s Luck questioned Gareth about acceptable weather patterns. He explained to her how the island was now mostly a tropical rain forest and how she could go about changing it to something else gradually, if she wanted. She and Tiger wandered off to check on the monkeys’ progress on the water and butterflies. Gareth looked around, remembered he was in a good amount of pain, and went back to laying down. Jahar stayed up there and sulked.

Jade’s Luck and Tiger figured they’d talk to Squishy about rain later and, with the now active volcanoes, talk to Fire about no lava. The monkeys had finished removing the water from the Fire Elemental room and were mostly done with throwing the butterflies into the forest around the Manse. Jade’s Luck told the cooking staff not to make muffins and Tiger told them to make them. The result was the monkeys made muffins, but made sure Jade’s Luck didn’t see them. She then told them that there shall be no muffins in her presence. Every once in a while, she saw a monkey running away from her with a covered platter.

The two wandered down to the former butterfly room to look at the destroyed vertical arch. Wanting to repair it, Luck went to go talk to Squishy to find out what it looked like so Earth could repair it. She negotiated with Squishy, conceding a part of the island he could always rain on and occasional escapes from the circle so he could wander around. She then let Squishy out so he could now talk to newRocky and describe it. Rocky physically fixed it, but the magic was another story.

Jahar wandered by and, upon seeing it reconstructed, remembered walking through it and ending up somewhere else. He had a clue of how to re-enchant it, but it would require a lot of rare components. Then he wandered back to the Air Elemental circle.

Gareth brought Jahar up some beer, then went to teach monkey how to properly create furniture. Some indeterminate time later, Jade’s Luck went back up to the Air Elemental place to find Jahar sitting there with an empty tankard next to him.

Jade’s Luck: You’ve been up here a while. Find anything more out about the circle?

Jahar: Not since I was first here. (pause) Easy enough to fix.

Jade’s Luck: How do we fix it?

Jahar: Just need Gareth.

Jade’s Luck: Gareth knows how to fix it?

Jahar: I need to tell him what to do.

Jade’s Luck: Oh. Well, You should have said that.

Jahar: You all wandered off.

Jade’s Luck wandered off to find Gareth. Down in the monkey caverns, she found Gareth trying to get the monkeys to not stick a square peg into a round hole. She told him Jahar needed his assistance in fixing the circle.

Gareth: One second. Nono NO! You. THIS way. NoO. …I need a whip…

He decided what he was doing was probably a hopeless cause anyway and went up to see Jahar. He found Jahar exactly where he left him.

Gareth: Did you want more beer?

Jahr rattled off a list of much more wood than he actually needed. He asked for multiple cubits of certain types and a couple of whole trees. Gareth came back with all the wood Jahar requested. Jahar instructed Gareth which tiny sections of the wood he brought back they actually needed and exactly how they needed to be cut. He then filled in the crack to complete the circle, as instructed by Jahar.

With all this extra wood, Gareth had lots of fun. He made himself a walking stick out of some of the silvery wood. He also made a perfect excellent carving of Jeeves.

Jahar: How do you get the monkeys to cart this wood away?

Gareth: I don’t get the monkeys to do anything.

Jahar got the attention of a wandering monkey.

Jahar: You there! Can you put the wood somewhere better than up here?

*Monkey shrugs*

Jahar: Stupid monkey.

Gareth proceeded to start chucking the trees off the balcony a la caber toss. He went for style for half of them and distance for the other half.

While Jade’s Luck and Tiger were roaming the grounds around the Manse, they heard lots of crashing in the distance. They had several ‘good’ ideas while out wandering around. Jade’s Luck wanted to make a little pond near the Manse with a miniature ship so they could have monkey pirates. Tiger wanted to get Squishy to make a rain clock (three columns of rain that rotated at different speeds).

Jahar started getting impatient while watching Gareth have fun.

Gareth: Yeah. Okay. I did that stuff. Now what?

Jahar: Well, once you get the monkeys to move the wood off the roof we can continue.

Gareth: I can’t get the monkeys to move the wood off the roof. Sides, this is fun.

Jahar: Well, I figure Jade’s Luck or Tiger will wander by eventually and they can get the monkeys to move the wood off.

Gareth went back downstairs and talked with Chef, giving him the idea to make sundrop candy. They thought it was a good idea, so made a small batch. Gareth then took a nap.

Eventually Jade’s Luck and Tiger came back. A monkey offered Jade’s Luck candy. Gareth got around to informing Jade’s Luck that Jahar was looking for them. Just as Jahar was getting impatient enough to go down and find them when Jade’s Luck was coming upstairs.

Along with Tiger, Luck and Jahar went up and summoned an air elemental. Tiger found the head scout monkey and instructed him to look for the Porposing Worm of Vengeance and any other Porposing Worms. They didn’t find the Porposing Worm. They didn’t find the Friendly Maiden. They didn’t find the canoes. And, finally, there was no barrel on the shore.

Jade’s Luck had Gareth make a little stone urn for Cindy’s ashes and took them outside to bury them. While she was outside burying, a muffin appeared in her hand with A-dom standing next to her.

Jade’s Luck: Hi A-dom.

A-dom: Ha Ha.

The muffin was alright. Jade’s Luck added the rest of the Circle to Ralph’s list. Ralph still wouldn’t add A-dom to the list, though.

Eventually Squishy came up to complain to Jade’s Luck cause the Air Elemental kept messing up his rain patterns.

When the Circle got together, they discussed searching out the other villages to inform them of the management change. Gareth wandered off to draw up new boat plans.

 

[Ao the Overkitty]

Synopsis of 12/12/05 session - “Debate Club”

Synopsis of 12/12/05 session

“Debate Club”

Since Gareth wandered off to go build some boats, the others decided to take their time doing things. Jade’s Luck talked to the Elementals to get a feel of what the island looked like. Wood told her that there were clearings to the north and to the east. He was concerned with all of the poisonous and nasty plants in the area. The Fire Elemental told her that he had two volcanoes and he wanted more. The Air Elemental was annoyed with the lack of power coming from his direction. The Earth Elemental was freaking out because the other Elementals were much more powerful than he was. They found out that the island wasn’t a mountain from the ocean floor but a pillar that mushrooms out to become and island that was being held up by the Earth Elemental. They discussed for a while what to do about that problem, but got nowhere.

Somehow they got on the subject of Jahar’s mother.

A-Dom: You hated this woman so much you wanted to sneak inside her womb and burst out of it from the inside. She's your mom, but you thought it was very important to be inside her to take her down.

They then discussed getting other manse and who would be the husband and wife. It was all very disturbing. Even more disturbing than the discussion about building an Elemental Hotel.

A-Dom: An importer exporter art gallery type thing. With weapons.

Jahar: And stables. Maybe zombie horses.

A-Dom: Oooh.

Jade’s Luck: No! No horses! No stables!

Jahar and A-dom then went into a discussion on the merits of non-equine zombie mounts. A-dom actually got Jade’s Luck to agree he could have a zombie centipede mount and Tiger sealed the agreement.

While they were discussing, a small creature with four wings flew up to them. Strangely, only Jade’s Luck saw him.

Freaky winged thing: Greetings!

Jade’s Luck: Well hello. That is a remarkable colorful neck decoration.

Freaky winged thing: Thank you. My name is Spinky and I’m from the Central Fluxful Department of Audits for the Misuse of Divine Powers. I am here to audit you. Tellus the Fierce, alias Jade’s Luck. Let’s see here. *pulls out a little briefcase and rifles through some papers* An audit was filled against Tellus the Fierce some three hundred and sixty six thousand nine hundred thirty three days ago by the Western Spirit Court of Bala-Lalala regarding the inappropriate imprisonment of one of their Earth Elementals, commonly referred to as Rocky, for well over three hundred and sixty days more than his year and a day contract.

Jahar began to respond, but then was reminded he could neither see nor hear the creature.

Jahar: I can’t hear you.

Jade’s Luck: Huh?

Spinky: The audit was authorized by the Celestial Department of Audits for the Misuse of Divine Powers over two hundred and sixteen thousand days ago. The subject of the audit was found to be hiding at the time.

Jade’s Luck: I’m sorry. I don’t think I was alive.

Spinky: Not an excuse. Your Celestial Representative was unable to provide your whereabouts at the time and was unwilling to provide a full proxy for you.

Jahar tried to interrupt the creature he neither saw nor heard again, but was rudely told to stay out of it.

Jade’s Luck: I’m sorry, what manner of creature are you? I’m afraid I don’t rec...

Spinky: I’m a Celestial Auditor. He did, however, insist that you would be returning at some point, so the item was shelved until you could be found. A few weeks ago we received a message from the Western Spirits Courts of Bala-Lalala that Rocky has finally returned to his family and friends who were missing him so. The audit was then modified from the previous three hundred and sixty days to a three hundred and sixty six thousand nine hundred thirty three days of unnecessary and unwanted imprisonment. An item claim of inelemental boarding and cruel conditions was added to the charge. Now, if you will just escort me to the prison where Rocky was being kept so I can judge the appropriateness of the claim of inelemental and cruel living conditions we can move along to your confession.

The Circle ‘quickly’ discussed squishing the auditor. A-dom thought it would be fun. Jahar thought it would be ineffectual and bad. He did suggest to have Squishy testify in her defense.

Ryan (impersonating CA): What were the conditions in here?

Ryan (impersonating Squishy): Raaaaaaain.

Ryan (impersonating CA): How do you feel about that?

Ryan (impersonating Squishy): Raaaaaaain.

Jade’s Luck and group led Spinky down to the Earth Elemental’s binding room.

Spinky: Awfully small binding circle. *tisks* (inaudible comment) And Rocky was confined to this space, oh hello there. (more inaudible comments)

Jade’s Luck: That’s what he said. We only got here a couple days ago. Apparently it was a different incarnation of me that I don’t remember.

Spinky: So you just left him here unattended three hundred and sixty six thousand days.

Jahar: I think we’re approaching this the wrong way. I also don’t think we should admit to a lot of these things.

Jade’s Luck: What he said.

Jahar: You’re recording everything we’ve said.

Spinky: Of course not. I have a perfect memory.

Jade’s Luck tried to get out of it by telling Spinky how many days old she was and had memory of. Spinky didn’t seem to care and told her to speak to her Celestial Representative about her faulty management. She told him she was trying to make things better with what limited knowledge she had. Spinky said that would help her with future crimes, but not the case in question. She asked who her divine representative was and how she got in contact with him. He responded that it was the Unconquered Sun.

She found out that if she gave a full confession, they’d drop the inelemental charge for her. The punishment would be seizure of all of her assets and property, which would be auctioned off and given to the representatives of the effected parties.

Jade’s Luck: Do I have any assets?

Jahar: You’re standing in one.

Spinky: Of course, should you refuse to confess, we’ll be forced to do a full and detailed audit of every celestial power you have ever used in your entire lives. Which is a process, which I’m told, has produced an unnaturally high rate of suicides in Solars, so I would advise against it. Full confessions are best.

Tiger: Decline confession. I want to see what happens.

Jade’s Luck tried to find out about an appeal, but it didn’t sound like a good way to go. She did find out that they’d just be seizing her property and assets in heaven, which she found out she had. She took to referring to that stuff as imaginary to annoy the auditor (the note to God).

She signed the confession, stating she had no memory of that time. She wrote a very silly note to her Divine Representative. She closed it with saying she didn’t really confess and that she was signing the confession under threat of a full audit. Jahar started to annoy the auditor with stupid questions.

Jade’s Luck: You know, he could probably find an audit for you if you annoy him enough.

Spinky: What was your name again?

With that taken care of, they proceeded to discuss how to make the new Earth Elemental’s job easier. They talked with Fire to see about expanding the pillar with lava to better support the island. They also discussed making more pillars, which Fire said he could do with more volcanoes. Jade’s Luck expressed the desire for him to be careful because to keep the mortals alive.

Jahar: But you could have your very own village of charred black people.

A-dom: That’d be awesome.

They sent monkeys out to survey the island. Three days later, the monkeys came back. They discussed some more, until Jade’s Luck suggested they discuss things while they walked to a settlement. So, they left the Manse heading north and continued talking. Jade’s Luck actually had a vision of the past, which she found a little freaky, but cool. She remembered standing on the very same island yelling, “Why won’t you give me any clue?”

A-dom: Please worship the Unconquered Sun. We don’t know HOW to worship the Unconquered Sun, but, you know, make something up.

Jahar: With all the literature gone, we obviously have to make it up, so lets start.

A-dom: Okay, what we do is we line them up and we make them all worship a different way. And, the one that doesn’t get smote, is the right one.

They started wondering where they were going to build the temple on this island. Then Tiger got the idea that the Circle just needed a ship big enough that they could cart around prefabricated temple parts for easy construction when they arrived at an island. Then they got into the topic of prefabricated followers, which A-dom liked cause that would involve zombies.

When they got to the north beach, they found that there was power coming from the north, but it was being rooted underground, where it stopped. They immediately blamed the Porposing Worm of… Whatever (they couldn’t seen to remember Vengeance’s name). So, they snuck up towards where the power was going to investigate and kick ass. A-dom and Tiger played ‘who is stealthier.’ Since it was the middle of the day and there were people milling about, Tiger couldn’t go everywhere he wanted to. A-dom made it so others didn’t notice him and just walked behind everyone. Clearly A-dom was the winner. He found the people here were praying to a rain god. They were all very pale-skinned people who were now very sunburned.

Crazy People: Please take away the evil light in the sky who burns us! This the Evil One Eyed Sky Demon with his burning rays of Hate. Please come back to us! Please do not forsake us! Bring forth the Goat!

The guy leading them was in hooded robes, but seemed to be one of them. They finished the animal sacrifice and all but one shuffled into a very small building (analogous to clowns and a car). The one left outside went back to sorting fishing nets. A-dom checked out the building and found a long staircase going down into the earth. Jahar found the power from the north going down there. A-dom snuck down and found a small cavern with a sacred flame and paintings on the walls and more stairs going down. There was also a barracuda bird on a perch. A-dom noticed that his crystal was pulsing light. Then the string it was on turned into a snake.

When A-dom returned to the others, he was carrying a lump of coal attached to a snake.

A-dom: It still works!

Jahar: A-dom, it’s dead.

A-dom: But it was the best whatsit ever!

Jahar began casting sorcery. The guy casting nets saw this, screamed, and ran inside. When Jahar finished, he said, ‘oops.’

Jahar: We should probably go down sooner than later, cause they know we’re here.

Of course, knowing the Circle, sooner wasn’t going to happen. They stood around discussing instead of acting. Jahar kept trying to direct them down the stairs, but the Circle inherently resists leadership. They got distracted by making sure a fisherman didn’t get help.

Eventually Tiger went downstairs alone, with the others eventually following. They found a distinct lack of torches for light, but Jahar was glowing with a coruscant aura, so it was all good. After all, Jahar was glowing with the power of the sun, so what could go wrong?

Tiger got down there first and found the villagers trying to organize and passing out spears. He relayed this info and the others discussed/argued about what to do until the villagers had plenty of time to organize and move up the stairs. Jade’s Luck was the only one to notice this.

Jahar: Ideally we won't have to kill them all.

Jade’s Luck ordered the approaching villagers to put down their weapons. Some of them obeyed. Luckily, the rest of the Circle either didn’t hear her or didn’t obey her. She met with limited success again when she ordered them to stop where they were.

Jade’s Luck: (to A-dom) I hear people coming up the stairs.

A-dom: (happy) Grrrr!

Jade’s Luck: (to A-dom) Don’t kill anyone!

A-dom: (confused) Aru?

Poor A-dom had to obey that order.

Battle was joined. People were kicked. People were punched. People were tossed. Some fell over the side of the staircase and fell down to the waterfall below.

Paul: Wow. The wonderful world of mortals with a spear. (pause) I need more dice.

Ryan: (counts dice) One two three four. Wait a second. You’re trying to kill me!

There was the yell of Damn Sun Demons! as one guy ended up in the drink. Some ran away. It was all very confusing.

 

[Ao the Overkitty]

Synopsis of 01/02/06 session - “Surprisingly Productive Little Solars”

Synopsis of 01/02/06 session

“Surprisingly Productive Little Solars”

Gareth returned to the island after a trip to Atlantis on The Grumpy Craftsman II, a small vessel (about 20ft x 5ft) built for speed. He wasn’t sure where the others were, so he sailed around the island. He saw a big glowing pillar of light near a small village that he recognized as the casting of a spell. As he sailed up towards the docks, he saw the glowing figure and several others all run into a building. As he pulled up to the dock, he noticed a guy laying on it, unconscious. He clearly seemed to have been hit in the head with a rock.

Gareth: A-dom…

He took a little bit to look around the village, just so something didn’t come back to bite him in the ass later. He found a sacrificed goat and it appeared a number of people had been praying by the goat. Then everyone went into a little tiny building, which was a little strange. He lazily summoned his armor and strolled over towards the building. Opening the doors, he found a long staircase going down and started descending.

He then heard Jade’s Luck yell, “And Don’t Kill Them!” Whoever them were, Gareth wasn’t going to kill them. He also heard clanging and yelling and other battle sounds coming from down below.

Gareth: Ah. Clearly they’ve stopped arguing.

Gareth didn’t bother summoning his sword as he made his way down the stairs. Tiger heard someone coming down the stairs, while A-dom showed he was far too perceptive (9 successes).

A-dom: Gareth’s coming!

By the time Gareth got down there, they had thoroughly whooped the mortals and were standing around. Then, a big, multi-prismatic tongue lashed out from the darkness, grabbed Jahar’s foot, and dragged him further into the cave. Reactions to this varied, with the most common one being the activation of Integrity Protecting Prana. Following after him was done when they got around to it.

Gareth looked around to see a lot of people standing around, a lot of inferior weapons laying on the ground, and some people fishing others out of the waterfall.

Gareth: So, I take it these are the people we aren’t supposed to kill.

Tiger: Yeah. We’re here to deal with the sun hating bastards and the Wyld they worship.

Jade’s Luck: They’re not bastards, they’re just misinformed. I’m sure of it.

Gareth looked over the people and found a guy with a third eye on his neck.

Gareth: You’re not supposed to have that.

A-dom: (picks up a sword and heads for guy) Right! I’m on it.

Gareth: (stern voice) A-dom!

Jade’s Luck: I’m not sure you should be removing parts of their throats. That generally leads to people dying.

The guy rather liked his third eye, since it allowed him to look at woman without them noticing. When asked when he got it, he said it was when he went into the holy cave (which was the glowing cave over there). That was the first time a tongue had emerged from it, but they had seen an unarmored penguin before.

They found out who the leader was and A-dom told him he’d better be nice to them, because they could make the rain come back, or make the sun shine more. The leader didn’t believe that the island belonged to the group, saying it belonged to the Rain God. The leader called down the power of the rain god to smite the Circle. It didn’t work. A-dom threatened him with a volcano.

Jade’s Luck: I’m personal friends with the rain god.

A-dom: We call him Squishy.

The leader guy was adamant that they didn’t worship the Wyld, just the Rain God. The eventually headed down the sacred cave. It was shiny like it was illuminated by an invisible light source.

Gareth: Hello Mr. Sacred Cave.

*Sacred Cave emits a loud belch*

Gareth: I think the Sacred Cave just ate Jahar!

They walked past a sign that said Welcome to the Sacred Cave and came to a saloon style door blocking their passage. Off to the side was a barracuda-bird sitting on a porch. Gareth offered it a fish, which is happily gobbled up. Jade’s Luck asked the fish where Jahar was, but it just shrugged. A-dom asked it if there was anything they should know before they went it, but it just shrugged. He thanked it and went on through the door. For some strange reason, the others just stood there watching.

Once through, A-dom found the floor moved on the other side, guiding him down the cave.

Echoing Announcer Voice: Welcome welcome welcome to the Sacred Cave! The cave of tomorrow, showing you the world today! Everyone now worships the sun god!

A-dom: Guys, come on in and check this out. There is a video and everything!

Gareth and Jade’s Luck followed. Tiger opted to stay behind, since he wasn’t protected from the Wyld. Silly git kept putting it off, thinking they wouldn’t have to deal with the Wyld again for a while.

Echoing Announcer Voice: Welcome welcome welcome to the Wonderful, Fabulous cave of tomorrow!

Images started flashing up on the wall of temples and shiny people in a field and happiness and A-dom on an undead centipede. Jade’s Luck then went on and on about blandishments.

Echoing Announcer Voice: All blandishments will be outlawed!

Pictures of a gallows and people being hung. Jade’s Luck said that that wasn’t very nice and asked for another future. The pictures changed to show people being drowned. She demanded another different one, saying she didn’t want people to be killed at all. The picture changed to that of people being thrown into a giant, bottomless pit. A-dom told her to stop arguing with the Wyld. She went on again about blandishments.

The tunnel ended in a large room with couches and chairs. A goat was sitting on the couch, smoking a cigar. The furniture didn’t look carnivorous. The goat was trying to get the sacrificing one goats stopped and promote the sacrifice of ostriches. He felt ostriches could be shipped around for this. A-dom thought there could be money in it.

Goat: Ever met an ostrich? s, every one of them!

Jade’s Luck went on again about blandishments. This was starting to really annoy A-dom. It is times like this that Gareth likes that he has learned to mostly tune them out. The goat wanted to know what a blandishment was. They were no closer to figuring out why she kept going on about them once she defined them. A-dom asked the goat if he had any more cigars. He handed A-dom a cigar, which tasted like rutabagas. They found out there was a guy here that helped with stuff, like the stopping of the sacrificing of goats. The goat was very helpful and gave them the idea of going to heaven to talk to the Unconquered Sun.

Gareth: You know, you’re supposed to light those.

A-dom: Bleh! That’d taste like burnt rutabaga!

Booming Announcer Voice: Now Serving Number 3082!

A squirrel came running out from underneath the couch and ran through a little door. A-dom stuck his hand underneath the couch and got stabbed. Looking underneath, he saw a dust bunny with a dagger. They argued. A-dom ended up getting another cigar from the goat and giving it to the dust bunny. Smoke started billowing out from underneath the couch. A-dom switched couches. When Jade’s Luck looked, there was a whole family of dust bunnies.

Eventually, Jade’s Luck noticed a little ticket dispenser. The goat told her they were to go see the guy. They did find out that the tongue came out the door and brought back Jahar (a strange glowing guy screaming put me down). Above the door, it read ‘No Admittance Until Number is Called.'

A-dom took a number (3,800,000) while Gareth walked through the door. Gareth went flying back, down the hallway, through the saloon doors, through a front window of a flower shop and landing on some flowers. Gareth bought some flowers from the little old lady. He then talked to Tiger for a while.

In the room, A-dom dove behind a couch and found himself crouched over a sleeping mummy. He then made himself look like one of Jahar’s family members. When he emerged from behind the couch, Jade’s Luck confronted him.

Jade’s Luck: Hey! What’d you do with A-dom?

A-dom: He’s napping.

She found the mummy and proceeded to disturb him, thinking he was A-dom, having turned himself undead. A-dom tried to stop her. Like that was going to happen. When asked, A-dom said he was Z-dom. The mummy wasn’t amused with being woken up and was adamant that he was not A-dom. She demanded to know why Z-dom was wearing A-dom’s stuff.

Gareth headed back down through the cave of tomorrow.

Echoing Announcer Voice: Welcome welcome welcome to the cave of tomorrow! The announcer talked about the wonders and technologies and how much better things will be when the builders take over. The only true leaders are the ones who build things.

Gareth got back to find Jade’s Luck beating on Z-dom. He wasn’t amused and tried to stop her by giving her a flower. Didn’t work. She wanted to beat up this guy whom she claimed said he killed A-dom (he never did). She clearly has some unresolved issues. Various creatures in the waiting room started moving away from those two.

The announcer called the next number and a little frog ran through the door. A-dom went up and demanded the door open in the name of house Cynis (which is funny, because he was claming to be Jahar’s long lost brother, who is of House Sessus). A-dom took a trip down the hall and into the flower shop. A-dom paid for some squished flowers.

Gareth offered the mummy a flower. The mummy wasn’t amused.

Mummy: People used to be so civilized. Now they let anyone into the Wyld.

On that note, A-dom re-entered looking like A-dom.

Echoing Announcer Voice: Welcome welcome welcome to the cave of tomorrow! When necromancers will take over the world! And worship the Unconquered Sun at the same time!

A-dom: Hey guys. What’s going on?

Jade’s Luck: What happened to the guy who stole your armor?

A-dom: He’s back there.

A-dom walked over to the mummy, pulled out his club, and started beating him.

A-dom: Give me your number!

Mummy: May the lice of a thousand camels rest in your loins!

Everyone who wasn’t A-dom backed away. A-dom just hit the mummy again. Gareth offered the dust bunnies a flower. The big one ate the flower and passed the leaves around. A-dom argued with the Mummy and hit him some more.

Mummy: Don’t make me call security!

A-dom: They have security?

Mummy: Yeah.

A-dom: Couple of big guys?

Mummy: Actually, they’re very small.

A-dom: Give me your number.

Mummy: No!

A-dom: I’ll give you mine.

Mummy: No! Your number sucks! You know how long I’ve been here?

A-dom: But you’re a mummy. You’ll never die. We will. Eventually.

Mummy: This is why you should consider investing in mummification.

The mummy was trying to encourage the practice of mummification and wanted more religions to incorporate it.

A-dom just wanted to hit the guy and told the other two it’d go faster if they helped. Luck and Gareth both didn’t want to hit him. The Announcer called the next number and the mummy went in. Gareth tried to go in with the mummy, but got flung back to the flower shop. He complemented the little old lady on her flowers, then went to talk to Tiger.

A-dom started yelling for security. A small field of maggots crawled into the room. They told A-dom was this close to being eaten from the inside out.

A-dom collected tickets, then ripped one off so it read 3008. When the number was called, A-dom and Jade’s Luck headed for the door, faster than the dust bunnies. But, once inside the door, they waited for Gareth, watching the dust bunnies hop past. A few seconds later, Luck and A-dom ended up in the flower shop. They chatted with Gareth and Tiger for a while.

A-dom: I could just take the whole ticket roll and throw it at the door. ‘The right number is in there somewhere, head. Open up!’

They tried to convince Tiger to come in with them, but for some reason he didn’t want to enter the Wyld.

Tiger: Are you really that clueless without me?

Paul: Yes!

Gareth: I have an idea! It’s… Evil. But it’s an idea. I must be channeling A-dom.

The three left Tiger behind and went back into the room. Looking around, only the goat was visible. Gareth brought his thumb and pointer fingers up so he was looking at the goat’s head through them, then pressed the fingers together. The goat’s head squished together flat. When Gareth separated his fingers again, the goat’s head regained its normal shape.

Goat: Oww! Why’d you do that? That hurt a lot. Oww, my sinuses.

A-dom: What number did they just call?

Goat: 3012.

A-dom: Aww !

Gareth: What number do YOU have?

(pause)

Goat: Uhh… You don’t need to know that.

Gareth: Oh yes I do.

Goat: Oh no. Not again.

The goat held up two of his, um, fingers, in front of him to block Gareth’s fingers from closing.

Goat: I can do this all day!

Gareth brought up his other hand and crushed the goat’s head horizontally instead of vertically.

The goat tried to stop Gareth, but he could only block one direction at a time. The goat’s head reshaped into a square, and then a triangle.

Goat: Oww! Stop! My sinuses!

A-dom: (crazy bucky voice) Give us your ticket and we’ll stop. Muwahaha!

Gareth: What is your number?

(pause)

Goat: (meekly) Three thousand (pause) fifteen?

A-dom: (crazy bucky voice) Give it too us. It is ours now.

Goat: (meekly) No.

A-dom: (crazy bucky voice) Then we’ll stop crushing your head.

Goat: (meekly) Will you talk to him about stopping goat sacrificing?

Gareth & A-dom: Yes.

Goat: Do you have an Eclipse around? Bring him in here and sanctify this.

Jade’s Luck ran out and grabbed Tiger. Somehow, she convinced him to come back with her.

Echoing Announcer Voice: Welcome welcome to the future of tomorrow! Where your brain will be eaten by a thousand monsters.

Only Tiger heard this and saw a thousand monsters trying to eat his brain. He managed to ignore it, though. Once in the room, Tiger grabbed a whole bunch of numbers before getting dragged over to the goat to sanctify the pact. Once sanctified, the goat handed over his ticket and Tiger ran back out of the cave.


Once their number was called, the trio headed through the door. As it shut behind them, they found where they were to be a dark place. For all of two seconds. Then Gareth activated his caste mark. They were in a room above the waiting room, where they could look up and see the waiting room above them. A-dom fell down, because he wanted to.

Gareth: See! Things like this are why I wanted Tiger along.

There were all sorts of knick-knacks and what not around the room. There was a small, grayish, ‘person’ with black oval eyes and no nose sitting in a chair.

Wyld Official: Hello there! And what will we be discussing today?

A-dom: A couple of things.

Wyld Official: Oh. I’ll make a list. Now, what are the orders if business?

A-dom: That would be goat sacrificing. Ostrich sacrificing. Movement of the Wyld. Ownership of the island. The stop sucking of our power.

Gareth: Where our friend Jahar went when some multi-colored tongue snatched him.

A-dom: Oh yeah. Jahar. That can be a footnote. Anything else?

Gareth: Why toes are so great.

Jade’s Luck: What’s with all the blandishments?

A-dom: Oh and artifacts all around. Anything else?

Gareth: Why A-dom should not be allowed any more undead?

A-dom: No. I don’t like that one. Don’t put that one on the list.

Jade’s Luck: How about a quick Q&A at the end?

A-dom: Sounds good.

A-dom made sure it was noted that the goats were against the goat sacrifices and would like it to stop. Especially the goat out on the waiting room (Milo). It was stated Milo was in favor of the ostrich sacrificing. Apparently, no one sacrifices ostriches, which A-dom felt there should be more of that. The Wyld Official said they could work on that. A-dom felt that the Circle could be able to help in the transportation of ostriches for sacrifices, for a small fee, of course.

A-dom: Movement of the Wyld. That would be the physical displacement of the Wyld to a completely different place. Like, say, the middle of Atlantis.

Gareth & Jade’s Luck: No! No. Bad A-dom.

A-dom: Alright. Below Atlantis.

Jade’s Luck: I have family there, thank you very much!

A-dom: Below Atlantis?

The Wyld Official explained that the Wyld does not exist in physical location, it merely borders with it. So, they discussed the relocation of the borders on this particular island. The Official didn’t really want to, stating they had done a good job of not going willy nilly and expanding everywhere. Once the problem was explained, the Official didn’t feel the Wind Elemental really needed power, but agreed to consider moving if a suitable location was found.

A-dom: Like, maybe, O-pec’s island? There is a lovely tomb there.

As Gareth once again told A-dom no, the Wyld Official’s eyes bugged out in terror. He adamantly refused to move to Opec’s island or go anywhere near him. After lots more discussion, A-dom suggested Highwatch. The Wyld Official readily agreed.

Outside, Tiger watched the cave as it stopped glowing. When he looked in, there was just a little, tiny cave there now. Completely normal looking. Tiger began subjugating the nearby mortals. He convinced them that if they worshipped the Unconquered Sun, he wouldn’t burn them anymore. If also told them that, if they spent more time outside, he’d stop burning them, because they’d get used to the sun. he did promise to slowly ween them off the darkness with rain.

When they got to the topic of Jahar, a small purse was brought out. A tongue popped out and it dropped Jahar.

Jahar: Why aren’t we on the staircase anymore? Oooh, shiny!

Jahar seemed perfectly normal, so they let him wander over to the bookshelf to poke at books. The Official couldn’t read his own handwriting, so they had to figure out what the other points were.

A-dom: Okay. There were a few more things on the agenda. We all agree that A-dom is a dick. Yup. No problem there. Umm, Turnips are great. Everyone on board there? Good.

Gareth: Nope. Turnips bad.

A-dom: Oh okay. There. Can you make note of that? Oh and, um, would you like a lemon drop?

Wyld Official: Sure…

*Someone hands over a lemon drop*

Gareth: Worship the Unconquered Sun.

A-dom: There. I believe we’re up to the questions and answers section. Good.

A-dom asked if he could transport them back to the island or if anyone here could. The answer was no. Gareth asked how he could get A-dom and Jade’s luck to stop bickering. He had no idea and suggested godly intervention, other than locking them in a box together until they work it out on their own.

Back on the island, Tiger went outside and found Gareth’s boat. He moved the boat over to the abandoned village side of the island, then headed for the manse.

Jade’s Luck asked him who he was, to which he responded Aylee. He had no idea where Kiki was or who Kiki was. Luck warned him to keep things quiet or some dragon-bloods might show up to try shut him down. He said he had things nice and contained. Plus, he only let in people who wanted to be there.

Luck asked him if he knew where any doors to heaven were. He said he knew where 32 were. They narrowed the list to the closer ones.

A-dom: You know one where it opens up on the Unconquered Sun’s doorstep?

Aylee: You know where the Imperial Manse is? There is a door right in there. Goes right where you want.

Jade’s Luck: Yeah, but that’d be death to us, so we don’t want to go there. Is there one where we’d be slightly less likely to get slaughtered by dragon-bloods? Or death knights or whatnot?

Aylee: There’s one in the Coral Archipelago. It’s in a bar. You have to be drinking whiskey to go through it. I don’t know which bar.

Chorus of ‘Bar hopping!’

Aylee: There is one on Nexia. It’s the closet in the Bodhisattva’s bedroom. He always keeps it closed. *sarcasm* wonder why. There is one in the cave in The Neck. I believe you need to be carrying a burning torch to walk through that one. There is one underwater in a temple in the Bay of Blood. You have to be bleeding to go through it. There is one on a fairly nameless island about halfway between the Bay of Blood and Abalone that is in the well. I don’t know if there is anything special about that one. And there is one in a little old lady’s house in Abalone. It’s right near the volcano, you can’t miss it. You could ask the little old lady if there is a special key for that one.

Aylee had no problem with A-dom being a necromancer. He said it was all how you used it. This seemed to annoy Jade’s luck. She felt that wasn’t right, since he gave her all these powers to zap undead, US must not like them and therefore A-dom shouldn’t be a necromancer.

Gareth: Well, he’s given me many powers to heal, and yet he’s given the rest of you lots of abilities to hurt and squish.

A-dom: Ha!

Jade’s Luck: Well, okay. Gareth has a point. (points at A-dom) You don’t

A-dom: You think that, cause the Death Knight…

Gareth: Lord.

A-dom: Yeah, Death Lord, gave this too me that there would be negative consequences?

Aylee: Probably.

Aylee didn’t know what they would be. A-dom asked him how he was. Aylee said he was okay and that he had a nice tuna sandwich for lunch. Luck asked him about other Exalts. He told them about the Lunars. He said they liked hanging out in the Wyld and were friendly. But they weren’t friendly in general, since they tended to rip people’s heads off in general. When asked what they did in the before time, he said he didn’t even know what Solars did. He had heard of the other guys, but they pretty much just hung out in heaven. He didn’t know anything about them.

Gareth asked him if he had read any good books lately. He said yes. How to Make Friends and Influence Mortals. He agreed to let Gareth borrow it. He’d just have to leave it with security in the waiting room when he brought it back. A-dom asked if they had any more questions to ask. Aylee said they didn’t. He also said they couldn’t get their hand stamped to come back later.

A-dom: Do you think my nether region will be cover in…

Aylee: (cuts A-dom off) Indubitably. Avoid camels like the plague. The moment you get near them, you’re screwed.

They thanked him for his time and Gareth wished him a good century. Before they left, the Purse, Pursey, convinced Jade’s Luck to take it with him. It lashed out and swallowed Jahar again.

Pursey: He wasn’t paying attention.

At least he wouldn’t get left behind. When they exited the cave of tomorrow, they found themselves just outside of Highwatch. Looking around, A-dom decided he didn’t want to be seen. So, in front of Gareth and Jade’s Luck, his face fuzzed over. He faded out and a little old lady faded in (still wearing A-dom’s armor).

A-dom: (high pitched voice) I’m a little old lady!

Jade’s Luck felt this would be more believable if he covered up the armor. He did look a little odd wearing leather armor, but not as bad as if he was wearing Gareth’s.

A-dom: (high pitched voice) I’m rough! Grrrrrrrrrr!

Jade’s Luck patronized him, as is par the course. The town looked pretty prosperous, since the group had left it alone for a while. Since they were two days walk from Atlantis, Jade’s Luck tried to figure out if she could afford a horse. She decided she couldn’t. Gareth could, but he didn’t want one (he tended to fall off of them). A-dom didn’t offer to steal her a horse, so they would walk.

Jade’s Luck worried about returning to Atlantis because she felt Jahar’s family would approach them about Jahar’s whereabouts. Gareth said that he’d been around for a month and no one had approached him about that. Besides, they could then just produce Jahar and let him deal with it. A-dom didn’t want to go Atlantis, just because. He much preferred the idea of sailing back to the Manse island. Jade’s Luck thought this was a better idea once A-dom brought up having to explain how they got back not on a boat. They ignored Gareth’s comment about blaming the Wyld.

So. Gareth went into giving A-dom a shopping list of stuff he’d need to make a boat. He said he’d need a hammer, chisel, material for a sail, some tar (or some other sealant). A-dom made sure he was a little old lady no one would notice. He found bed sheets for a sail and honey for a sealant.

When A-dom returned and handed over the goods, Jade’s Luck snatched up the honey to eat. Gareth quickly took it back and hid it from her. It wouldn’t work as a sealant, but it would be tasty.

A-dom got the idea to just steal an entire boat. He knew a town about a day’s walk towards Atlantis that probably fished. So, they walked. Gareth wasn’t exactly for the stealing of an entire boat, but since he couldn’t crap tar, it’d have to do.

Once at the town, they found it had a small dock and four boats. A-dom took a look and pointed out the ship that was least likely to be missed, since it was in terrible condition. Gareth was okay with this. A-dom came up with a good idea for a charm he’d like to learn. It started with just replacing the object with a cardboard cutout so no one would notice and ended with an illusion double that would last for twelve hours or so. Since a little old lady walking into town and walking out carrying a boat wasn’t something someone looked for the first time around, A-dom made himself unlikely to be noticed and retrieved the boat, bring it inland to be repaired.

Gareth made the boat as functional as it would ever be. Once it was ready, A-dom ordered everyone in the boat. They quickly reworked The Leaky Tub into The Less Leaky Tub of Doom. Then A-dom carried the boat to the sea and they sailed off.

Back on the Manse island, Tiger retired to the Manse. The Air Elemental was all happy power was coming in. They celebrated by making it snow and sleet.

They stopped at Hoen-ba island to check things out and get tar. A-dom finally understood that Gareth had made a small fleet of ships back on the Manse island that all needed to be sealed. Everything was cool in the village. Everyone loved the shaman’s new hut. Everyone hangs out there Friday nights and other huts were trying to recreate the image (like the rock garden). There were no new followers at the temple. Jade’s Luck handed out candy to the three kids and gave them more candy to hand out to others. They followed their example in saying, ‘Worship the Unconquered Sun’ when they handed it out later. When Jade’s Luck wasn’t looking, Gareth handed the honey over to the kids.

Gareth: The Unconquered Sun loves you.

Kids: (slightly mind controlled sounding drone) Yes…

The Unconquered Sun is sweet. The Unconquered Sun gives you diabetes.

Paul: (laughing) You guys are the worst at running a religion ever.

Ryan: Yes! We Win!

Gareth made lots of barrels for tar. Jade’s Luck visited the shaman. She gave her a lemon drop, but didn’t follow up with the saying. She gave Luck a weird look. Luck asked if there were any ostriches around. Hoen-ba-ba-den didn’t know what one was, but got that it was an ugly bird. A-dom talked to her about not sacrificing goats, but strange birds instead.

Eventually, they sailed back to the Manse island. They found Gareth’s other boat was now parked closer to where the other boats were in dry dock. Gareth and A-dom carted the barrels of tar in to where the boats were and set Skelly up tarring them.

Jade’s Luck yelled for a monkey. When one monkey showed up, she sent it running off to tell Tiger they were back. About half an hour later, she realized that she should have told Tiger they were headed to the other village to check them out. So, she sent another monkey to tell Tiger to meet them there.

Ranger approached Tiger twice, relaying both messages. He also relayed that Luck tired out two ‘men’ sending those messages. One of the scouts led Tiger to the other village, since he’d just get lost on his own.

Jade’s Luck realized that she should have made flying monkeys while she had access to the Wyld. Too late now. Close to the village, the two groups met up. Tiger relayed that the other town (Vancouver) was doing better now. They were living outside more. Some still didn’t like it, but they were doing better.

While they discussed how to approach the island, Gareth suggested just coming in with stuff to give and trade to them. You know, be nice and handing out presents. It worked for them before.

Tiger and A-dom went to scout the town (of London). It appeared to be a fairly normal town that lived in an area where it rained all the time. There were huts with lots and lots of awnings and overhangs. The people were walking outside the buildings a lot and they seemed to be much happier than the other village about recent events. They seemed to be enjoying the sun and its warmth (people lying down in the sun). They appeared to be fishers and hunter/gatherer types (no farms). There were a couple of caves used for growing mushrooms. No wacky mushrooms, though.

Gareth made some spoons, bowls, pitchforks, shovels, rakes, rope, torches, canoes, dreidal type tops with each side being a solar caste mark, little dolls with solar caste marks (at least one of each).

When Tiger and A-dom returned, they relaying info about the town. A-dom asked if the Circle should really be arming them and suggested leaving the pitchforks where they were. So, Gareth concentrated more on the rakes and shovels for compost heaps. A-dom suggested putting little sun signs on all of the stuff, which Gareth liked and did. Jade’s Luck came up with caste marks for the dolls. She then made a little song for the top. Gareth wished he could have made the dolls say something.

A-dom: (squeaky voice) ‘Worship the Unconquered Sun!’ ‘Bring A-dom dead bodies!’

Gareth: I was thinking the A-dom one could go ‘Would you like a zombie?’

He really didn’t like Jade’s Luck idea of putting spirits inside the dolls, but Tiger’s suggestion of magic might work. A-dom asked Gareth if he could make several extras for him. A-dom didn’t share his idea about sneaking into homes in Atlantis and planting the toys for children, so Gareth made him the toys.

Jade’s Luck’s song sounded fine to the rest of the Circle, but they weren’t music critics. A-dom got the idea for Solar booze.

A-dom: ‘Worship the Unconquered Sun! Get blitzed!’ ‘The Unconquered Sun wishes you to get -faced!’

They went into town, handed out stuff, took credit for the rain backing off, and let on that Luck & Tiger now ‘ruled’ the island. They were generally well received. The kids liked the toys. They got applause for making the rain stop. The kids picked up on the dreidal song. The people traded Gareth fish and mushrooms for the rest of his stuff.

Alex: *hands Bucky a cookie* Worship the Unconquered Lori!

Ryan: Yes sir!

A-dom encouraged them to worship the Unconquered Sun. They thought that was a little odd, but said okay. A couple of people were interested and wanted to learn more. Gareth offered to build them a temple. They liked that. Jade’s Luck talked to them about what they’d pray for.

Random Villager: Rain is a sometimes thing!

After Gareth built them a temple, the Circle went back to the Manse. Jade’s Luck checked in on the Elementals. Things were pretty good. The Earth Elemental still wanted a bit more support for the island. So, they began talking out things with the Fire Elemental about making more pillars. They eventually settled on a tripod system of stability. This would need three volcanoes. They used the two existing volcanoes to start with. There was a little rumbling for a couple of days and then they were informed that had two pillars going down to the ocean floor near the center of the island. They had the sense to have A-dom and Gareth go and move the now tarred fleet to the ocean before having another created over where the abandoned town was. A-dom also cleared out anything of value (i.e. not nailed down) from the abandoned town onto the ships. They used Squishy and the Air Elemental to help keep all the flora and fauna safe from the ash and lava (thoroughly wetting down areas and blowing ash out to sea). They had Fire do his best not to go near the villagers, but he said to tell the people to run if necessary.

With all that taken care of, they quickly discussed their plans for what to do next. No one objected to going to Heaven for a quick trip.

 

[Ao the Overkitty]

Synopsis of 01/09/06 session - “Dear God, We’re Creating the Alliance!”

Synopsis of 01/09/06 session

“Dear God, We’re Creating the Alliance!”

The Circle relaxed a little now. For some reason, Gareth thought it might be a good idea to have an undead on each of the boats, kind of as an emergency crew member. Talking with A-dom, he learned that the necromancer had learned a few more tricks and could create hybrids now. You know, like zombies with twelve arms or with paddles for arms. This concept intrigued Gareth. Not that he himself wanted to learn how to do this, he just thought it could be useful. Speaking with Jade’s Luck, she had gotten it into her head that the way to fight the Wyld was for people to start having babies. So, she asked Gareth about assessing the competence of the midwives on the island and training more of them. Gareth took this to assess the competency of the healers on the island. He found London was okay for now, since they had two healers. Vancouver, on the other hand, now had none. It seemed that their healers were part of the zealot rain cultists that Tiger suppressed. So Gareth immediately started training two new people in the healing arts.

At the same time, Jahar was being secretive in one of the caves/houses below Vancouver. All but about three people were living above ground now, so he pretty much had free range of the place. Gareth didn’t think anything of it because he was occupied and, well, when was Jahar not being secretive. A-dom took the time to go and make a zombie (skeleton with lots of meat on him). Zombboy even had vocal chords.

Eventually he took A-dom and Tiger down to his little cave in Vancouver. He showed then his little ritual room with candles and a binding circle and told them that he was going to be performing a ritual at midnight and wanted them around for protection. A-dom took the time to try and teach Zombboy how to play cards. It went poorly. He just kept repeating Go Fish!

Jahar cast his protective magic after the sun went down and, at midnight, began his little ritual. A crack opened up in the middle of the circle; a kind of violet, black doorway. Out plopped an eight feet long porcupine-snake with arms at the far end of the snake body. Jahar and the porcupine-snake stared at each other for a few minutes before the demon swore and lost the staring contest. Jahar waved A-dom forward.

Jahar: I have a single task for you. You’ll serve for the duration of this task and then depart whence you came. You’ll harvest certain plants, specified by this man, (A-dom waves) from this island on which we stand upon. You will then store them, safely, in containers or areas, specified by this man. (A-dom waves) You follow no instructions from this man that do not relate to plants or undead, unless he tells you to stop wounding or killing something. During this time you’ll harm no human, exalt, monkey, spirit, or animal, unless I or this man give you permission and it is attacking you. Do no incite an attack against you. My laptop is not going to turn off while I’m reading this. You’ll obey any additional commands of mine during this time, but they will not supersede my standing orders without explicit instructions.

The demon got Jahar to drop the no-hurting-animals clause, since animals included bugs.

Jahar: Animals may be hurt as needed during the collection process excepting humans or exalts or monkeys.

The demon made a note and stuck it on one of his quills.

Jahar then told A-dom to have the demon pick all the poisonous plants. The duo walked up the stairs with Jahar a few steps behind. In one of the huts, Gareth was awoken from his slumber by the sound of at least two people and a strange animal walking past outside. He then heard a gasp and someone running into the woods. Looking out the window (hole in the hut), Gareth saw Jahar, A-dom, and a snake-porcupine demon walking by. Gareth immediately summoned his armor and weapon. The two outside just saw a flash of light come from one of the huts, twice.

A-dom: Hopefully someone just exalted. I’m going to go away. Probably not.

Jahar said he’d deal with it and for A-dom to go along on his way.

A-dom: (yelling) Hey Tiger. I could use a second.

Gareth exited the hut with sword and armor on to find Jahar in the way.

Jahar: Good evening.

Gareth: Apparently not!

Jahar did his best to explain the advantages of having a demon on the workforce and what it could accomplish that undead couldn’t. He met with strong resistance.

Gareth: We have him (A-dom) for a reason.

Jahar: And raise the dead?

Gareth: They’re not doing anything.

Jahar: This thing is more intelligent and tightly constrained.

Gareth: We don’t need something more intelligent.

Demon: Oooh. Pineapples! *munching noises*

A-dom: I don’t think those are poisonous.

Demon: No, they’re tasty! *munching noises*

Jahar then let Gareth in on his plan. He felt he needed to bring his family back something of value, to curry favor with them and gain some capital. This money would be used to start a trading business with Jade’s Luck, a front for the Circle’s activities. The best and easiest way to do this was to sell these poisonous plants to House Cynis.

Gareth did not like any bit of this plan and made that known. He figured at least a couple of people were going to get killed in this. To illustrate this point, a couple of quills came flying past them to imbed themselves on a hut. A-dom thought this was a cool ability.

A-dom: Heads up!

Jahar: A-dom, what’d you tell it to do?

A-dom: Nothing! It did it itself. It was kind of cool.

Demon: I didn’t hurt anyone!

Gareth: We’re supposed to be making a case for Solars being okay people and not demon summoners. How is this helping to achieve this task?

Jahar: I didn’t come here and pacify an entire town. It’ll do its job and it’ll do it quietly. Watch it for a while.

Demon: (loudly) What about these? Are these poisonous?

The demon showed A-dom bananas. When A-dom spoke in the negative, the demon ate the bananas.

Jahar instructed A-dom to be a bit more explicit in his instructions or this task would take forever.

Tiger: Also, make sure it doesn’t eat all of the edible stuff on the island.

A-dom: Okay. Your island.

A-dom pointed out some man-eating plants. The demon coiled around them and spiked.

A-dom: Sweet! So, how did you become a demon? Or are you just one?

Demon: Just am.

A-dom named the demon Pointy.

Gareth: Have you considered what is going to happen when Jade’s Luck comes upon A-dom walking through the forest with Zombboy and the demon?

Jahar: That was one of the flaws in my plan. I figured I’d have to summon another demon after that.

Gareth: I was thinking more along the lines of the trouble we have between her and A-dom now. What is it going to be when she finds him walking around with a demon? A-dom is clearly going to get blamed, you’re not.

Jahar: Maybe I could finally convince her to learn sorcery so she could be my backup and learn banishment.

Gareth: So, better to beg for forgiveness than to ask for permission?

Jahar: I have been living in dragon-blood society all this life.

Gareth: I’m going to go talk to her, before this gets further out of hand.

A-dom and the demon returned at this point. The demon looked like a walking, pointy shrub of doom, since his way of carrying was to stick stuff to himself.

Gareth took Tiger aside for a few minutes.

Tiger: You have a problem with this?

Gareth: You need to ask that question?

Tiger: That was a facetious question.

Gareth: If that demon gives you any reason to kill it, do so as quickly as possible. I want you to keep an eye on A-dom and the demon until I get back. I need to go talk to Jade’s Luck before she gets the idea that this is A-dom’s fault. I’m going to the Manse now.

A-dom instructed the demon on what to do with the various poisonous stuff.

Demon: Okay, where are the barrels?

A-Dom: I don’t know. Where are the barrels? (pause) Gareth, we need barrels.

Gareth: Skelly has barrels. I’m occupied.

A-Dom: Aww. Come on… I don’t think tar and poisonous plants go well together.

Gareth: (points at demon) Do you want to be blamed for that?

A-Dom: I don’t care. I don’t!

Gareth gave up and took half an hour to make them about fifty barrels to store the poisonous stuff in (so it didn’t come in contact with the villagers). A few of the barrels were poisonous themselves. A-dom was smart enough to pick out those barrels, in theory.

Gareth left a note for his healer apprentices to practice what he had taught them and he’d be back in a few days. He then walked in a straight line towards the Manse with sword in ginsu mode. Jahar followed about fifteen feet behind. At least a road to the Manse would be useful. A few birds got in the way of the ginsu. Their loss.

Jahar: That is very demonic of you.

The monkeys were smart enough to avoid the ginsu effect. When he was about a day away from the Manse, Ranger approached Jade’s Luck.

Ranger: Boss! Boss! There is someone coming from the town to the north to here, making a road. They’ve got a shiny sword that’s *makes chipper/shredder noise*

Jade’s Luck: Anyone you recognize?

Ranger: One of your friends. Not the other boss. He’s walking straight here. He looks angry.

Jade’s Luck: Maybe you should show me which way to go…

Ranger took her up to the Air Elemental’s balcony and showed her the path of destruction in Gareth’s wake. At the tip of the path, she could see stuff just coming out of it going every which way. She decided to just wait for him.

Jahar unused quote: Aww, he’s pissed cause I enslaved a creature of the underworld to do my bidding.

Twelve hours later, Ranger approached Jade’s Luck again.

Ranger: Boss! Boss! He’s getting really close now!

She went out to meet them. She sent a monkey to fetch some washing pails with water, towers and some lemonade if there was any.

Monkey #1: Make Lemondade!

Monkey #2: What’s the hell are lemons?

Monkey #1: I don’t know but make it quick!

Jade’s Luck could two hear two men arguing underneath the sound of the buzz sawing sword. The monkeys came running out with a pitcher of something orangish.

Monkeys: It is close to lemons, we think.

She set up an area to wash off and a place for the pitcher and a couple mugs.

Gareth and Jahar came into view as Gareth’s sword wound down. They were covered in a mix of grass, splinters, pitch, blood, and feathers.

Jade’s Luck: And what are you arguing about that you had to come cutting a road from the ocean to our front door?

Jahar: Well, I don’t think we needed to cut the road, however Gareth wanted to get here quickest to tell you that I had summoned a servant of the underworld to…

Gareth: (cutting Jahar off) It’s not the Underworld. It’s Hell!

Jahar: I bound it very tightly and when it is done playing around it’ll be sent home.

Gareth: He left it in A-dom’s charge.

Jade’s Luck: That doesn’t sound very good.

Jahar: If I didn’t have to come here to explain myself I probably would have stayed with it to make sure.

Gareth: I left Tiger in charge of A-dom.

Jahar: I left it very explicit instructions to not do the things that A-dom says that could get us all into trouble.

Jade’s Luck: I see… So, after he’s destroyed the island you’ll be making me a new one?

Jahar: Precisely.

Jahar then filled her in on his plan. She didn’t like the poison business either. Gareth told her his plans were her problem and they needed to be more concerned with the demon right then and there.

Jade’s Luck: I’m not entirely thrilled about the demon being on my island, really.

Jahar offered to repeat his instructions for the demon. Jade’s Luck felt assure that the demon had enough holes in the pledge to do as much damage as it wanted to. Jahar called that assessment fair.

Gareth: It seemed to like eating fruit. Whatever fruit it could find.

Jahar assured her it was now restrained to five bananas worth for fruit for every bushel of venomous plants it collected and stored. Jade’s Luck questioned him on how much fruit this would leave the villagers. He said he didn’t have time to find this out because Gareth was going off and he needed to catch up.

Gareth: He didn’t want me coming to talk to you on my own. He was afraid I was going to put this in a negative light.

Jahar: I knew you were going to put this in a negative light. I just wanted to be here to defend myself.

Jade’s Luck: Well, you’re really not, cause, you know, summoning a demon is already fairly indefensible.

She then went on to twist Jahar’s words to make it sound like Jahar felt Gareth was too feeble to make the trip to the manse on his own and incapable of restraining her. Jahar denied this, of course, and said that they’d be done soon. This let her see that the plan wasn’t to clear all of the poisonous plants from the island, because it would take MUCH more time to clear an island of this size than two to four days.

She wasn’t the happiest about the death of lots of little woodland creatures when Gareth made the road, but understood the necessity of expediency in this matter. Besides, she could always instruct Wood to regrow that, if she didn’t like it. That had also been her plan for getting rid of the poisonous and dangerous plants as well.

Jade’s Luck: So, A-dom and a demon are somewhere on my island playing together?

Gareth: Yup.

Meanwhile, A-dom and Tiger were getting bored. A-dom struck up a conversation with the demon, finding out he was a paperweight and message holder in hell.

Back at the Manse, Jade’s Luck wanted to know why Gareth wasn’t supervising the demon himself. He responded that he thought he should come to the Manse and tell her before A-dom got blamed for this. She considered that fair.

Jade’s Luck: So, a small dog has come into my house and pooped on my rug. And then I am told there is a case to present to me.

Gareth: Well, you pick up the case, you scoop up the poop, you roll up the newspaper and go Whap Whap Whap ‘Bad Dog!’ I’m going back there.

Jade’s Luck: I’m considering that. Please take this small dog with you.

Back with the demon, a villager walked by.

Demon: (yelling and waving) Hi there!

A-dom: Don’t touch the demon.

Demon: (yelling) Run for your life before he tells me to eat you!

The villager went screaming off into the wilderness.

Gareth headed back towards Vancouver. Jade’s Luck finally got across to Jahar that she had spent several months trying to improve this island, that this was HER island and he hadn’t asked permission to do this summoning. Seeing Gareth heading back, Jahar followed after him. Jade’s Luck instructed the monkeys to keep and eye out for the demon (a big, moving other). After an hour or two of meditation and trying to keep her temper, Jade’s Luck followed.

A-dom suggested that they take a break and play cards with Zombboy and Tiger. The demon followed this instruction, since A-dom got around Jahar’s orders by involving the undead. A-dom and the demon played against Tiger and Zombboy. The demon cheated heavily, allowing them to win. Tiger was depressed that someone out-cheated him.

When they went back to work, A-dom instructed the demon not to do anything sneaky.

Demon: (sigh) Okay (yelling) DEMON COMING THROUGH! MAKE WAY! DEMON COMING THROUGH! KEEP BACK! STAY AWAY FROM THE DEMON!

He did this as he went into town to drop off poisonous stuff.

A-dom: Stop! Stop! Stop screaming demon at the people.

Months of wooing these villagers, gone in a day. At least he was efficient. Somehow, A-dom felt relieved that he wouldn’t be blamed for this, regardless.

The demon ran out of barrels, so A-dom told him to start making piles.

When Gareth and Jahar got to the village, they found lots of barrels full of stuff, lots piles of poisonous stuff, and some armed villagers trying to construct a flotilla by lashing their boats together. Gareth initially went with his first instinct, which was to instruct the villagers how to properly construct a flotilla. This was, until Jahar reminded him that they didn’t want these people leaving the island. Jahar spent the next couple hours with Harmonious Presence Meditation making the villagers understand that all was good with the world. Jahar mentioned that they currently had an associate with the demon and it was being taken care of. He then went in search of A-dom. Gareth wanted to show the villagers how to properly construct a flotilla, but figured he should help Jahar instead. Gareth stopped Jahar from wandering into the rainforest aimlessly and told him A-dom would likely come back by the road.

Back on the road, A-dom saw Jade’s Luck up ahead, walking towards him.

A-dom: ! Okay, you (the demon) stay behind me. Zombboy, you go ahead. (yell) Hi Jade’s Luck! I, uh, made a new one.

Jade’s Luck saw a zombie, A-dom, and a pile of poisonous plant material with eyes and spikey things hiding behind A-dom.

Jade’s Luck: Yeah. You should take Jahar’s little pet back to him right now.

A-dom: That’s where we’re going. (pause) Okay.

Demon: (yelling) STAND CLEAR OF THE DEMON!

Gareth and Jahar didn’t get outside the town’s borders before they came across a zombie. Following behind Zombboy were A-dom, then the demon, and a little back, Jade’s Luck.

Gareth walked over to Jade’s Luck and explained that Jahar somehow managed to calm the village down and explain everything was okay. He said they had been building a poorly constructed flotilla, but that was dismantled now.

A-dom instructed the demon to balance on one foot.

Demon: EVERYTHING IS A O K.

Jade’s Luck: Be quiet.

Jahar: Don’t worry. I’ll send you back from whence you came shortly. It is much better than sunlight.

A-dom instructed the demon to balance on the other foot.

Jahar: Oh, and stop listening to A-dom.

A-dom: Damn it!

Jahar: I do wish to point out that, if I were allowed to continue, this would have been an excellent way of clearing out the island. (to Demon) Return back to hell!

Demon: Oohh… You want all the plants?

Jahar: Take them with you. (pause) The plants that are on you only!

The demon rips a hole in the ground. A huge bale of hellfire comes out of the ground. It crawls into the hole.

Demonic Voice: Where the hell have you been?

The hole closes up, leaving burnt plants and ground around the hole.

A-dom: Did you know he spent all day just… standing on a desk?

Jahar: I really (pause) don’t care. (pause) I will say I did learn next time to word the dealings better. And to not be on your island.

Jade’s Luck: Next? (turns to Gareth) Did you hear that?

Gareth: Oh, I knew there was going to be a next.

Jade’s Luck commented on the level of badness that comes along with summoning a demon.

Gareth: There is a reason why I don’t have much of a problem with A-dom’s necromancy.

Jade’s Luck: I’m starting to understand your point of view.

A-dom: (hopeful) Really?

Zombboy: Want me play cards?

Jade’s Luck: That might be pushing it a little.

A-dom: (raised voice towards the village) Ladies and gentlemen, it’s okay. We are professionals. We have banished the demon.

Jahar didn’t think A-dom’s pronouncements were a good idea. So, Instead of A-dom there was a little old lady with them. Jahar went back to trying to point out the virtues of proper demon summoning. Jade’s Luck pointed out that the Death lord’s books and the dragon-bloods both agree demons bad.

Jade’s Luck: In several hundred years when you learn to properly bind a demon I’ll be less annoyed by it.

Back in town, there were some people talking about putting the flotilla back together again, but the majority remained calm.

Jahar: People, people, didn’t we tell you we had to take care of it? We just took care of it. It’s gone!

Villager: Are you sure?

Jahar: Yes.

Villager: Is there a corpse?

Jahar: No. It got consumed in the fire.

Villager: There was a fire?

Jahar: That was what the burst of flame was.

Villager: Oh. I thought that was the demon eating you.

A-dom: It’s okay. We know what we’re doing.

Villager: Who the hell are you?

A-dom: I’m Cindy. I’m with them. I’m new.

Gareth wandered off to go talk to his students. He tried to instruct them to let him know when something like ‘that’ was happening. That was a difficult process, since telling them to ‘tell a monkey’ is just plain weird. Jade’s luck suggested that they put a note under a rock, but they couldn’t write.

A-dom noticed Zombboy was still with him and instructed him to go back into the forest and wait for him.

Young Villager: Grandpa Billy? (yelling) Quick! Quick! Pitchforks and Torches! My grandpa has come back from the dead as a demon possessed body! We have to put him down!

Before Gareth could find his pitchforks and torches to start handing them out, Jade’s Luck fried Zombboy. The villagers calmed down again. A-dom was sad. Jahar was still making A-dom look good.

A-dom: I’ll have him wear a hooded robe next time (pause) I like that idea!

Jahar then started talking about constructing a set of rules for the Exalts so they didn’t run into these problems again. So, if they run into other exalts, they can inform them of the laws too.

Alex: Oh dear god, we’re creating the Alliance!

Jade’s Luck: Rule number one. We don’t summon demons on another Exalted’s doorstep.

A-dom: Um, crowd! Are there any Lunars about here?

*Crowd looks at him funny*

A-dom: Right. Okay then. Carry on.

Gareth took A-dom aside and made sure he knew that some of the barrels were poisonous. Jade’s Luck decided that the people needed a writing system. Gareth told her that was her task, since he was teaching some people medicine. When she asked him if he wanted his healers to be literate, he responded’eventually.’

A-dom felt like training people too, so he looked for their undertakers to impart wisdom upon them. He found out there were Catacombs and was led to them. He promised to teach them how to properly take care of bodies. A-dom liked the catacombs a lot. He tried to explain mummification to the villagers. He convinced them it was a good idea, but not to do it yet since he didn’t have all the details. He then went into telling them about the Unconquered Sun and becoming exalted. That was a train wreck in the making.

A-dom disappeared and then reappeared.

A-dom: When the Unconquered Sun looks upon you in favor, you can do like that.

He explained to them that they need to be brave and heroic. He did explain the important part that they might die without exalting.

Jahar and Jade’s Luck discussed what it would take to repair the transportation circle in the Manse. He pointed out the worst parts to her, which included the sacrifice of a loyal servant. He also tried to explain demon-blooded to her.

Alex pretending to be Jahar: When a woman and a demon love each other very much.

Tiger felt left out training mortals, so he decided to train some assassins. Eventually Jade’s Luck explained to Jahar about Pursey and the Wyld now being by Highwatch. He had problems coming to terms with how she made a deal with the Wyld, which doesn’t keep its word, while she has problems with him making a deal with a demon, which had to keep its word.

Jahar worked on a preliminary draft of rules for Solar society for review. He also looked for mortal sorcerers in the making to train.

Jade’s Luck found she had to help Gareth teach, since he was very knowledgeable but bad at imparting said knowledge.

In his spare time, Gareth built Jahar his own ship to carry the poison, because Gareth would have none of that on his ships. The ship ended up being about fifty feet long. It was named Jara’s Pride which Jahar found annoying but acceptable.

Gareth got Jahar to have A-dom get the barrels on board instead of the villagers. But, first, they once again needed tar. So, Gareth and A-dom sailed off to a nearby island that would likely have tar. While they did this, Jade’s Luck talked with the Earth Elemental about making tar on the island. He said it’d take thirty or so years and would be dangerous to mortals. She worked on natural deterrents to ward off mortals from that area.

On the tar island, A-dom made Zelly and Telly to cart the tar back barrels. They proved themselves useful in tarring the boat when they got back, too. At night, A-dom had a few new zombies move the poison barrels on board while A-dom and Gareth moved the rest.

Jade’s Luck got Gareth aside and discussed with him the possibility of putting a flaw in Jahar’s boat make it sink, poisons and all. She didn’t like Jahar’s plans of selling poison any more than Gareth. He said that would be too obvious on his part. She made doe eyes at him.

Gareth: That doesn’t work on me, dearie.

Jade’s Luck: (pouts) It worked when I was five.

Gareth: You’re no longer five.

He then told her about the poison barrels. She liked her plan better.

Jade’s Luck also informed Jahar of their finding out about portals to heaven and their plans to go there to talk to the Unconquered Sun. They decided going to Abalone would likely be the best portal to use. But first, Jahar and Jade’s Luck felt they needed to go to Atlantis first. For some reason, they felt they should make an appearance and make some accounting for their whereabouts for the past four or so months.

They discussed what they could do with their trading company. A-dom suggested zombies as native curiosities. That wasn’t well received. Jade’s Luck liked the idea of A-dom dressing up like a native to dance and such for parties.

Jade’s Luck brought up a rule about the proper treatment of slaves for the Solar code of laws.

Before they sailed off, Jahar convinced his acolytes to become sailors on his vessel.
Eventually they set sail on two separate boats. Jahar and A-dom sailed the Jara’s Pride while Gareth, Tiger, and Jade’s Luck sailed The Grumpy Craftsman. A-dom put his three zombies in barrels on Jahar’s boat.

By the time they got to Opec’s island, A-dom and Jahar looked bedraggled and fried, but Jahar’s acolytes started getting the hang of sailing a big vessel. A-dom took the time to help Gareth make a corral dock there, where they parked the boats. Jahar went to go talk to Opec while they made the dock.

 

[Ao the Overkitty]

Synopsis of 01/23/06 session - “Old Whores Make Bad Sailors”

Synopsis of 01/23/06 session

“Old Whores Make Bad Sailors”

Once the Circle sailed into the port of Atlantis, they went their separate ways.

Gareth went home, checked the shops stores and books, and was actually around to drum up business and deal with walk-ins. His birthday was a fairly quiet affair, as far as the Circle was concerned. He spent the evening with his family. His mother griped about him still being unmarried and not giving her grandchildren. One of his in-laws approached him about taking on apprentices. He got a few nice things (a leather apron, a heavy wool cloak with matching mittens, and a young cat for his shop). He spent the rest of his time expanding his business to include armor, restocking supplies and making plans for building forges on Hoen-ba and the Elemental island, chewing the fat with his friends and contacts, spending time with his family, and training two apprentices. Jade’s Luck had helped him come up with several stories to tell his nieces and nephews that were based on their recent travels, like ‘the crazy rain worshipping people of Vancouver.’

A-dom spent his time hanging around Gareth’s shop. Not much for him to do when he can’t look like he used to without being brown, and thus attracting the attention of dragon-bloods.

Jade’s Luck spent the time working for Matron Jade and explaining her whereabouts for the past several months. She talked with Matron Jade about the trading company and her possible role in it. She also talked to her about needing a bodyguard and taking one on. She brought She-Dom (think Ugly Stepsister from Shrek 2) around so that Matron Jade could inspect this new bodyguard of Jade’s Luck’s.

Jahar and Jade’s Luck had several sessions where they talked about the formation of the trading company. A lot! The spent hours, maybe even days, discussing what they were going to sell, where they were going to sell it, how they were going to procure it, where they were going to get backing from, and what they were willing to do to get that backing. They decided to employ some of the old whores who worked for Matron Jade, but they weren’t sure what they were going to use them for. For some reason, Jahar seemed to think old whores made bad sailors. But, basically, it was a very long conversation that not even Jahar paid much attention to.

They also met with the other members of the Circle about their trading company. Gareth offered to help them with what forms they’d need to file, what bribes they’d need to pay, and what permits they would need to obtain. He also offered to introduce them to several different merchants and craftsmen they might have interest in doing business with. Jahar mentioned something about needing Gareth to build a city sometime. Jade’s Luck was very grateful to have some help with the paperwork.

Jahar and Tiger went around forming the new trading company. Jahar sold the poison for capital; they talked with seedy contacts and family.

A couple weeks after returning home, Gareth went to visit the shop of his merchant friend across the street (the guy who lent Gareth a horse and told him about the Swiftstone archipelago job). He let Gareth know that the noble dragon-bloods were cracking down of dishonest merchants using illegal slave labor to protect honest merchants like them.

Sometime later, Gareth had a quick chat with A-dom back at his shop before talking to the slave, Joe. Gareth told A-dom he might have to knock Joe out if he looked like he was going to flip out and cause problems. Gareth explained to Joe that Empty Bucket had wandered off and very likely failed to file the proper papers after purchasing him, so the dragon-bloods would likely consider him an illegal slave. He then talked to Joe about getting him off the island for a brief time so they could straighten the situation out and asked him what he wanted. As Gareth explained things to him he looked more and more nervous. He kept shifting from looking at Gareth to looking at A-Dom and back.

Joe: Umm... I'd like to be free. That would be nice. But my master or at least some Dragon Blood would have to free me. I don't want to be an escaped slave. Escaped slaves are not for filling their role in the universe. They reincarnate as bugs and leeches or worse... disenfranchised. *he visibly shivers* I don't want to reincarnate as any of those. Freeing me probably involves lots of paperwork too. (looked really depressed when this came up) But they don't tell us slaves much about that.

Even if I'm freed, I don't think I could survive in the wild. I'm just a tailor. I don't need to live in a city but I would need to go to a town or village. Cause I really need a place where I could buy food. This just sounds awfully complicated.

His eye-line clearly dropped to look at the ground and he wrung his hands together.

But I don't want to be executed or tortured or anything. You've been nice to me, so I don't want you to be beaten or interrogated or investigated because of me. Maybe we should just go and tell a Dragon Blood that my master ran off and hasn't taken care of me, and they will know what to do. That's why we have Dragon Bloods. To take care of these kinds of things. We just aren't qualified. Lets go tell a dragon blood before we get in trouble. Waiting will only make it worse. You have a Dynast friend don't you? You know some Dragon Bloods who could help us... right?

He then looked up at Gareth with puppy dog eyes. A-Dom wisely waited for Gareth to respond instead of just knocking Joe out.

As Joe began to panic and talk about going to the dragon-bloods to sort it all out, Gareth realized he had given Joe too much information and, well, truth.

Gareth: Everything is going to be fine. I know some people that can help. You are not an escaped slave. You won’t be an escaped slave, you’ll be a freed one. You’ve been performing admirably in your task the past several months and the gods have seen this. Just as you have been fulfilling your place in the universe, I need to fulfill mine in making sure you get a fair cop. So, now is not the time to draw attention to yourself. It will take some time to get you freed and talking to the dragon-bloods before then about your situation will only make it worse. I was suggesting we relocate you briefly for your comfort and ease of this process. I know of a couple of villages that could use your skills and you wouldn’t have much problem fitting in.

Joe seemed more relieved by this. Gareth set him to the task of sewing something in the back and closed up shop. He and A-dom headed off to Luck’s Tea House to find Jade’s Luck. While they waited for Jahar and Tiger to show up, Gareth explained the situation to Jade’s Luck. She came up with a plan how to get Joe off the island discretely. When Jahar showed up, all he wanted to talk about was the trading company and ignored the problem at hand. Gareth talked to Tiger about forging the proper paperwork in Empty Bucket’s name for freeing Joe. Tiger said he wasn’t sure if he could do it or not, but he might know someone who could. They hung around for a while yet as Jahar kept going on about the trading company and everyone’s role in it.

Gareth collected some supplies for a sleeping potion from the market and brewed one up. The next day Jade’s Luck came over while Joe was enjoying a stew laced with sleeping potion. Once Joe passed out in his stew, Gareth told Jade’s Luck to do her thing.

Jade’s Luck: Huh what de huh?

A-dom: Purse him, woman!

Luck pulled out Pursey and asked it to grab Joe. Pursey sucked up Joe and the stew, then promptly fell asleep.

A-dom: Your purse is sleeping. That’s just weird!

With that taken care of, Gareth, Jade’s Luck, and A-dom took a quick trip to Hoen-ba island. Once there, they woke up Pursey, who now had the hiccups, and spit out a sleeping Joe.

Jade’s Luck carried Joe to town and to Hoen-ba-ba-den’s hut. Gareth explained that Joe was a tailor and he wanted him to stay in their village for a few months. Hoen-ba-ba-den said her old hut was free. Gareth told her he was a nice guy and a good worker. He explained that Joe didn’t speak their language and asked her not to eat him. She said Gelf would stick around him and said that, if they decided he needed to be eaten, they’d wait for Gareth to get back to so they could chat about it. Jade’s Luck let her know she could know speak their language.

Hoen-ba-ba-den: Good for you. Nice to see you’re getting civilized.

They found out that Chief Klun wasn’t very good at sailing his boat, so Gareth went to go teach the chief and some of the villagers how to work the sails and riggings. Jade’s Luck brought Joe to the hut and sat watch over him for a day and a half till he woke up. A-dom, now unsupervised, decided to try juggling children. He didn’t kill any, but some had to be fished out of a tree. He gave them a Solar doll to fight over.

Jade’s Luck calmed Joe down when he woke up and explained he had a bad reaction to something to his soup and they were now on the other island. Luck explained that it was a good island with nice villagers and not to discuss religion (ah, heathens). He went to use the bathroom (second tree on the right) and noticed the villagers lacked pants. He decided that needed to be rectified. Gareth came back by from teaching the villagers to sail better boats to introduce Joe to Gelf. Joe offered to make Gelf pants. Gelf didn’t like his inside leg being taken, but Gareth convinced him pants were a useful thing and that he’d like them. They got along fine. Gareth said they’d check back in a few times and the trio headed back to Atlantis.

Jahar waited a few more days before decided he had put off seeing his wife long enough. He figured out how to take off his bracers. He then went to see her cousin to see if she was in town and how she had been.

Cousin: Grumpy. Do you know what morning sickness is? You haven’t been married before. (pause) Oh, by the way, congratulations.

Jahar found out she had her Goremaul with her, so decided not to visit her in the morning. He visited Jara in the early afternoon, hoping she’d be sluggish from food or a noon nap. He found she was lounging in a Cynis garden with Isis. He went in with Harmonious Presence up, just to be safe.

Isis: Ah. Look who’s here.

Jahar: I just heard the news.

Isis: Well, that’s what happens when you disappear for months on end. You do realize you still have wedding presents you haven’t unwrapped.

Jara: (wifely voice of doom) Hello husband. (pause) Where have you been?

Jahar stood there thinking for a minute before he answered.

Jahar: I was debating on whether to congratulate you or answer your question first. I was marooned if you must know, but first, congratulations.

Jara: (wifely voice of doom) Thank you. Marooned? And how did you become marooned?

Jahar: Well, the ship we were on was stolen.

Jara: (wifely voice of doom) Why were you on a ship?

Jahar told her that he was trying to make a name for himself and their family and start up a trading company to provide for them.

Jara: (wifely voice of doom) Oh, that’s nice. You could have left me a note!

Jahar: I didn’t know where to leave it.

Jara: (wifely voice of doom) You find a slave. *whistles* Bring me a slave!

Jahar: I most humbly apologize for me extended absence. It was not intended.

He then told her he had named the new ship that brought him home in her honor. She said she accepted his apology. A slave was brought in.

Jara: You are responsible for taking all notes from my husband and bringing them to me promptly! You’ll be flayed alive if you fail!

Jahar asked her how she had been and what she was doing. She said that they had not managed to capture the anathema that had destroyed a chunk of the city during the wedding. But they did manage to find another anathema and kill it outside the city.

He stuck around for some more small talk, then left.

The Circle got together to plan their next voyage, they decided to head to Abalon by a circuitous route so they could combine establishing the trading company with finding a gate to heaven. Jahar set up Jara’s Pride to go on another voyage to establish a trading route or something.

They spent another month on Atlantis before heading off on their quest. Gareth managed to train his two apprentices enough so they could run the shop and make horseshoes and stuff, but not weapons or armor.

The trip was fairly boring. They stopped at a number of places to make friends and trade stuff. They got to the point where Jade’s Luck needed to start speaking the Koomba Barbarian language she had learned. Since they had an actual crew on this voyage (in addition to Jahar’s two acolytes), they found themselves trading for food a lot. They laid off on the preaching and no dolls or sundrops were distributed. They hit a stretch of islands that were Hoen-ba sized. Jade’s Luck did hand out candy at one of the islands though. No one went behind her saying ‘worship the unconquered sun’ though.

Ryan: Conquer the Unworshipped Sun! Conquer the Unworshipped Sun!

Spoken like a true death knight. Bad man.

Gareth realized that, from what he was told, the next island was just far enough away that, if they pushed really hard, they could get there before calibration. If they didn’t push really hard, they’d be at sea when Calibration started. So, he had the choice of staying on the crappy island they were on until after calibration or taking the chance to get somewhere better.

Gareth: We’re going to push really hard and head for the next island.

Jade’s Luck: Do we want to talk to the crew and ask their opinion?

Gareth: No.

Paul: Gareth understand the idea of being a captain. The crew gets nervous when you start asking for opinions.

The mortal crew got to sleep more than the Circle the next few days. Gareth also set up the shifts so that the mortals were all on the same shift. The day before Calibration they still hadn’t reached land. The crew got sent down below to rest.

Gareth: A-dom, push!

A-dom: Aye aye, Captain!

A-dom got off the boat and started pushing the boat and kicking. His strength was only an eleven. Jahar went down below with his acolytes to pray to the Unconquered Sun for aid.

As it got closer and closer to midnight, A-dom pumped up his strength more. Gareth kept his eye out for any land, but didn’t see any. Once it clicked past midnight, A-dom was happy cause it was his birthday. Of course, it was also now the first day of Calibration. Jade’s Luck threw a muffin down to him.

Off in the distance, Gareth noticed a small boat being chased by a larger boat, without sails. The larger boat was going faster than The Grumpy Craftsmen and seemed to be trying to catch the smaller boat before it reached the land off in the distance.

Gareth: (to A-dom) Peddle faster!

Gareth then pointed out the boats to the others on the deck and went to go tell Jahar. He found Jahar and his two acolytes praying in Jahar’s room.

Jahar & acolytes: Hummina hummina Unconquered Sun. Hummina hummina good stuff. Hummina hummina please don’t let us die.

Gareth: Stuffs going on.

Jahar sighed and left the room with Gareth. When he filled Jahar in, Jahar relayed that there were tales of pirates in the south with sail-less ships that were dragged by poorly controlled demons. He suggested they be stopped.

Gareth: They’re pirates, so stopping them sounds like fun. Cause then they’ll be dead pirates, and then they’ll be okay.

Gareth went back up and yelled down to A-dom what Jahar just told him about a demon propelled ship.

A-dom: Aww! I’m out of essence!

Gareth: I wouldn’t mind at all if, while we’re killing the pirates, the dead ones rose up and helped us kill the rest.

A-dom: Damn it! I need essence for that!

As the larger ship was getting harpoons out to grapple the smaller ship, no one noticed a raven fly off the smaller boat and fly up and over to the mast of the larger ship.

Someone asked Gareth if they could ram the pirate ship with The Grumpy Craftsman. He wasn’t sure, but was willing to try. He then got a better idea and told Jahar to ram the larger ship with butterflies instead.

Gareth told A-dom to get back onboard and that Jahar was casting butterflies. A-dom started putting finger holes in the boat as he climbed back onboard. About a hundred yards away, Jahar got to the fore of the ship and began casting. The pirates were hurling harpoons at the smaller ship and some of them were sticking. Jade’s Luck and Tiger noticed the raven drop off the mast and dive bomb towards the deck. It then did something strange, because it made a hard veer away from the ship and dove into the water. Then butterflies went off and plowed into the middle of the pirate ship, leaving a large hole and lots of dead mortal pirates. Gareth then turned the ship as hard right as he could to avoid the butterflies, but ended up scraping alongside the pirate boat. Tiger leapt across to the nose of the pirate ship and started killing mortals, followed by Jade’s Luck. No one noticed a fish leap out the sea, change into a huge bird/human creature and start scaling the pirate boat.

Tiger slashed up pirates as he made his way towards the back of the boat. He rarely killed a guy outright, but the fast acting poison on his sword finished the job. Jade’s Luck didn’t see any obvious sorcerers or demons, so she beat up a pirate by running up him, whapping him with her war fan, doing a summersault over his head as he dropped to the ground dead and whapping his friend with the fan on the way down again.

Jahar, however, DID notice the demon. The demon was a huge thing in the water pulling the pirate ship. It was almost underneath the smaller boat up ahead. He told Gareth he’d protect the ship and that the demon was in the water. He then pulled out a bow and fired an arrow into the water. Unfortunately he didn’t manage to get the arrow to the demon.

Gareth looked across to see the guys parallel to him. He leapt into the air, did a summersault, and cleaved through the mortal chump steering the pirate boat.

Gareth: Ha-HA!

The guy standing next to Gareth spat in his face, burning Gareth’s flesh like acid. A group of three pirates ganged up on Jade’s Luck, not that they actually managed to hit her.

Demon Pirate Captain: Get them! Take their ship! Arr!

A-dom leapt over and jumped down to knock another hole in the boat near the obsidian butterflies. A-dom came out the bottom of the boat and noticed that the demon was a lot deeper than everyone thought and it was surfacing rapidly towards the little boat. A-dom thought it would have been cool to fight the demon, but he couldn't get there in time. So, he just watched.

When the thing scaling the boat got to the top, the Circle and pirates could see it was an eight foot tall female human/Raven monster with feathered arms, wicked looking claws on feet and hands, and a bird head.

Female RavenBeast: Lightbringer, Demon Slayer. What are you waiting for?

She then grabbed a pirate’s head and twisted it off.

Jade’s Luck saw this raven beast near her and was a bit afraid of it, but at least it was killing pirates.

Tiger made it back to Gareth, leaving more dead pirates in his wake, leaving just the acid-spitting Captain alive.

The demon shot out of the water, hanging in the air for a second. It was a big, scary thing with lots of tentacles and spikes on its tentacles. Some of the people in the small boat were knocked out into the water by when the demon emerged. Then the demon flopped down on top of the small boat, destroying it and those within. A-dom would have clapped, if he had seen it.

A couple of pirates jumped to The Grumpy Craftsman by Jahar and engaged him in combat. Jahar managed to wound one of them. Gareth actually managed to wound the Demon Captain. For him, that’s pretty good.

Gareth: Careful Tiger, this one spits acid.

A-dom crawled into the hull of the boat and monkey leapt up through the boat, smashing much. At the apex of his jump, he realized he didn’t have a plan and fell back down through the boat, making more boat shards. Between the obsidian butterflies and A-dom's extra work, the boat was now starting to break in two, down the middle.

Tiger managed to dispatch the Demon Captain by chopping off his arms. Unfortunately, this freed the demon from its servitude and it swam away. A-dom waved goodbye. It waved a back.

With the pirate boat breaking apart and sinking, Gareth and Jade’s Luck booked it back to The Grumpy Craftsman. Also, several pirates started surrendering to get off their broken boat. One surrendered to the Raven beast. Three surrendered to Jade’s Luck. One surrendered to Jahar.

Jade’s Luck: (to the Raven Beast): Um. Hi. Truce and you can get off the sinking boat?

Raven Beast: Ummm. Suuuure. I don’t know why you’re trucing.

The big Raven Beast picked up her surrendered pirate and jumped boats.

Jade’s Luck:: So, how do you know Jahar?

Raven Beast: We’ll get to that… Who’s Jahar?

Jade’s Luck:: Well, you called him Lightbringer, but nobody calls him that anymore. We call him Jahar. Well, he was Lightbringer, now he’s Jahar. I just figured you knew Jahar.

Raven Beast: Well…

Jade’s Luck: Yeah, it’s kinda weird that way.

Raven Beast: Well…

Jahar realized that there was something he needed from the sinking boat and leapt across. He got Tiger, who was currently mutilating the body of the Demon Captain, to pick up the pieces and bring them back to the ship.

Gareth worked to untangle his boat from the pirate vessel so they wouldn’t capsize. He then went about looking for survivors in the water from the small boat. Finding one floating in the water, Gareth fished him aboard and checked him over. He seemed okay, except for some nasty bruises from hitting the water after being flung twenty feet up by the sea demon.

Jade’s Luck collected the pirates’ inferior weapons and tying up the prisoners. The Raven beast looked overboard for more survivors from her boat, but didn’t see any.

Jade’s Luck:: Should we head for land, since it is right over there and such and Calibration bad?

Raven Beast: Yes, and I’m sure the island people would love to deal with these people.

A-dom’s head bobbed out of the water, then he climbed back onboard.

The Raven beast changed into a raven and then into a young, pretty woman. Though she was only five foot two inches tall, she was built lean, so appeared taller than she was. She had black hair, stick-straight and about waist length. Her nose was a bit hawk-like, giving her a fierce appearance that was softened by bright blue eyes and a compassionate expression.

Jade’s Luck:: Well that’s unusual.

Gareth: Uh, are you a demon too?

No Longer a Raven or a Beast: (annoyed) Are you a demon?

Gareth: No.

No Longer a Raven or a Beast: (annoyed) What do you think my answer is?

Jahar walked over holding a demon head in one hand and a knife in the other.

Jahar: We’ve been looking for more like you.

No Longer a Raven or a Beast: Really?

Jade’s Luck:: So, how do you know Jahar?

No Longer a Raven or a Beast: I don’t know… *points at Jahar* That. I remember Lightbringer. This is only…half.

Jahar: He was a long time ago.

No Longer a Raven or a Beast: Lightbringer would have dived into the water and slain the demon. Instead of letting the demon be free and running about Creation.

Jahar: Lightbringer is, was a lot stronger than we are now.

No Longer a Raven or a Beast: Lightbringer probably knew a great deal more. More than I know.

Jahar and the woman then had a short conversation I couldn’t hear while Jade’s Luck rearranged her scarf to hide her caste mark and went downstairs. The woman said her human name was Ceri. She said that they were on their way to the island because someone needed healing there. Gareth inquired what was wrong with the person there, stating that he was a decent healer in his own right. She didn’t seem to know why the demons were chasing her boat, but wanted to find out. Jahar wandered off to muck with the demon head.

A-dom: I’m a demon.

Gareth: No, he’s not. (pause) Sometimes I think he wishes, but he’s not. (pause) I’m Gareth, by the way. Captain of this vessel.

Jade’s Luck found the crew had been watching outside through a porthole. They couldn’t see much, but they seemed excited about what was going on. After all, pirate battles are neat. She tried talking to the crew to misdirect them and reassured them that they were going to land.

Jahar was walking around trying to find a way to preserve the eyeballs of the Demon Captain. He decided pickling was the way to go and was looking for a jar. Jade’s Luck intercepted him and told him about the crew having a peephole. She sent him back topside while she fetched him a jar. He went to his room to spend time with his acolytes. They tried to roast some food on his bonfire.

The non-glowing Circle members set about putting the pirates in the hold where they wouldn’t interact with the crew.

 

[Ao the Overkitty]

02/06/06 session - “Calibration is Not the Time to Look for the Environment!"

Synopsis of 02/06/06 session

“Calibration is Not the Time to Look for the Environment!”

While Jade’s Luck escorted the pirates down to the brig, Gareth found himself left mostly alone to sail the ship. He found out from Ceri that the island they were sailing towards was called Ja-HA. Since it was a couple hours before time, and they were just offshore of the island, Gareth dropped anchor.

Jahar and A-dom went down below to intimidate some of the pirates.

A-dom: You there! What do you know about demons?

Pirate: They, uh, pull ships real well?

A-dom: (grumbling) Yeah, well, he’s right there…

Pirate: You don’t want to fall in the water.

Jahar: What happens then?

Pirate: They eat you.

Jahar found out the pirate’s name was Bob.

Jahar: How many ships are traveling with you in the water?

Pirate Bob Um, none.

Jahar instructed A-dom to slap Bob to jog his memory. One thump and a dead pirate later, Jahar turned to the rest of the pirates.

Jahar: I think you can apply some wisdom, if I ask how many ships were you with, don’t answer literally.

Pirate #1: What the did he just say!?

Pirate #2: I don’t know! Answer quick, man!

Pirate #1: Yes! Four!

Jahar: There are four ships?

Pirate #1: Yeah.

Jahar, at least, realized that the guy just shouted out a number because he thought Jahar wanted a number. They took him in another room to further the questioning. He found out that the guy didn’t know about any other ships in the area and that he had only been sailing these waters for three weeks. Their ship had been pirating the waters for about twenty years now, if you believed their brags.

Jahar: Who are they?

Pirate #1: Tony and Frank and Jimmy.

The pirate said their group wasn’t organized enough to have a name. The pirate captain’s name was Nunzio. The pirate didn’t know the name of the demon, since he didn’t know demonic. He said Nunzio spoke demon a lot, though. The pirate had only been on the ship for three weeks, so hadn’t visited the ship’s home port. When asked who had been on the ship a long time, he replied Bob. He did agree to point out someone in the group who had been with the ship a long time.

Once back with the other pirates, he pointed out the oldest guy in the group and Jahar and A-dom took that pirate away for questioning. When Jahar asked the old guy, Tony, how long he had been with the ship, Tony pulled off his belt and started counting notches. Seeing it had been a long time, he asked him for the demon’s name. Tony didn’t speak demon either. Jahar asked him where his ship’s port of harbor was and Tony replied he couldn’t tell him.

Jahar: A-dom, this man won’t tell us…

Pirate Tony: No no NO! It’s not that I don’t want to tell you. I REALLY want to tell you. I CAN’T tell you!

Jahar: Why not?

Pirate Tony: Spells. (pause) Demon spells.

A-dom: Can you write it down?

Pirate Tony: No.

A-dom: Can you rhyme it?

Pirate Tony: I... hold on. (pause) It sounds like...

*Tony’s head explodes*

While Jahar admonished A-dom, Tony started to melt.

Jahar: Go find me another old man now.

A-dom noticed that the melting Tony was starting to slowly eat through the floorboards. Jahar quickly went and fetched Gareth to deal with this problem. After retrieving a metal shovel, he had A-dom dump the gooey mess out a porthole, away from the boat.

Jahar: Oh, by the way. Gareth, just for your reference. There is a spell on these guys that, if we try to make them speak of where they come from, their heads explode.

Gareth: COOL!

A-dom: Ooh. Ask them to rhyme it. That does it right there.

While Gareth returned to the deck, A-dom went and had Pirate Bob’s friend point out another old member of the crew. A-dom returned to the small room with Fatty the cook. Fatty looked down at the stain on the floor and gulped.

Fatty: How can I help?

A-dom: Well first by not melting.

Fatty: I’ll try my best.

Jahar instructed Fatty to stand still and let him examine the spells on him. Fatty complied.

Up top, Ceri, Gareth, and Jade’s Luck were discussing things like Jahar and demon summoning. Ceri was quickly becoming convinced that something was clearly wrong with Lightbringer. Ceri asked if he could do anything besides summon demons. Jade’s Luck enthusiastically replied that he could summon swarms of obsidian butterflies and almost destroyed her Manse. Gareth said that Jahar did seem to think it was better to summon demons than summon elementals.

Down below, Jahar persisted in questions revolving around the pirates’ port of harbor. He didn’t seem to grasp that Fatty was the cook and didn’t come out of the galley much. He was getting rather irate over this.

A-dom: It’s okay, Fatty. Calm down, Fatty. He’s a noble. That pretty much explains it.

Jahar: Maybe we can get them to draw a map. If we can see where they are going to make the x, you’re not hearing this Fatty. If we can see where they’re going to put the x before the head explodes.

Fatty: (worried) No?

A-dom: If you want to blow up pirates, wait until we’re on the island. Then you can blow up as many pirates as you want!

Jahar: I don’t want to blow up pirates. It is messy.

A-dom: Well, then don’t! I’m betting they can’t rhyme it, they can’t draw it, they can’t mime it, they can’t like, you know, charade it.

Having heard A-dom say Jahar could blow up as many pirates as he wanted, Jade’s Luck decided to wander down to their discussion.

Jade’s Luck: Can’t you just remove the spell?

Jahar: I can’t figure out how.

A-dom: Look. We’ve already killed three pirates. I’m sure they’re noticing that they aren’t coming back.

Ryan: Why is Mr. Magoo our sorcerer?

Jade’s Luck convinced Jahar to leave the pirates alone for a while so he could figure out the spell.

A-dom: So, where are you from, Fatty?

Fatty: Uh, Abalon.

A-dom: Oh! From whereabouts? By the volcano or by the water?

Fatty: By the water.

Jahar: (talking to Jade’s Luck) Then A-dom told him to rhyme it. His head exploded.

A-dom: It didn’t work. It was COOL!

Fatty: Wait, you’re A Dom? They don’t get it, do they?

A-dom: (laughing) No they don’t. Shhhhhh!

Fatty: That’s funny.

Jade’s Luck: What, is this something you can talk about?

Fatty: Oh yeah!

Jahar: Feel free.

A-dom: Fatty! I wouldn’t.

Fatty: I can’t. He’ll hurt me.

*Jahar steps between A-dom and Fatty*

A-dom: Jahar! Bob!

Jahar: I could make you a dog.

A-dom: I could make you a zombie.

Jahar: My dog could eat your zombie.

A-dom: I didn’t mean I could MAKE you a zombie.

Jade’s Luck ushered Fatty back to the other pirates and told him to reflect on how naughty he had been as a pirate all these years. He denied naughtiness, stating he was just a cook.

Jahar headed up top while Ceri headed down below. When Ceri passed him, Jahar did an about face and followed her.

Ceri asked the pirates (well, Fatty) one question; whether they picked her ship on purpose or if it was just convenient. Fatty didn’t know, saying that the Captain ordered the attack. He then said you don’t talk to strange men who talk to demons or question the captain’s orders.

Ceri: Thank you.

Pirates: Could you not kill us?

A-dom: We’re not killing Fatty.

Ceri: Okay.

While she was walking away from the pirates, Jahar approached Ceri about trading information about what they knew of the past, what they knew and thought of creation, what they knew and thought of other exalted, and what they were currently doing.

Gareth, Jade’s Luck, A-dom and Tiger talked about what to do with the pirates. Jade’s Luck and A-dom thought they’d be a good addition to the crew. Gareth didn’t like that, that way, they wouldn’t be paying for their crimes as being pirates. Tiger suggested making the pirates trustworthy via oath.

Jade’s Luck wasn’t sure what to do about the crew and thought they might need to be left somewhere. Tiger added, ‘or killed.’ Gareth pointed out to Jade’s Luck that, for her fledgling trading company to gain other crews, their current crew needed to return safely. Otherwise, the trading company would be considered bad luck and no one would sign on with them.

As the two groups chatted, the sun rose above the horizon. When they looked over at the beach, Jade’s Luck and Tiger could see a man waving a yelling at them. A-dom saw the guy and heard him asking if they had a healer on board.

A-dom: Do we have a healer on board?

Tiger: Healers? We have Anti-Healers on board.

Gareth: Yes. We have two onboard. Myself and also Ceri.

A-dom: Ceri?

Gareth: The Lunar.

Jade’s Luck started yelling Ceri’s name and went down below to find her. Hearing Luck, Ceri headed up top. Luck quickly relayed that Gareth told her she was a healer and that there was a guy on the shore looking for a healer.

Ceri: They’re waiting for me.

Up top, Gareth was getting a dinghy ready, since he had said he would like to accompany her to the village. He wasn’t expecting her to come up on deck, shift into a raven, and fly over to shore. A-dom saw the guy on the shore look relieved and usher her toward the village.

A-dom: Apparently they know her here.

Jade’s Luck tried to get Gareth’s attention. Since Jahar and A-dom were already getting in the dinghy to go with him, Gareth told her he was going ashore and he was leaving her in charge. He clearly didn’t realize this was a bad idea. Tiger, however, did. He quickly headed towards the dinghy, but Jade’s Luck stopped him and told him she had a job for him here. He tried to tell her he was going ashore, but she wouldn’t let him.

As the dinghy lowered down to the sea, A-dom made a comment.

A-dom: Umm, she shouldn’t be in charge!

Jahar: Merely an observation.

A-dom: You shouldn’t be in charge either. Out of all of us, only Gareth should be in charge.

Gareth: Yeah, but the rest of us are going ashore, so it doesn’t really matter.

Once Gareth’s head was below the deck of the boat, Jade’s Luck started talking to Tiger.

Jade’s Luck: Wouldn’t it be much more convenient if we didn’t have to keep sending our crew below decks for fear of them betraying us, for finding out we’re the dread anathema?

Tiger: …yeah…

Jade’s Luck: So if we just make them promise to be our good and true and loyal servants and not be scared of us cause we glow sometimes. And maybe we can get the pirates in on that with the not being pirates thing. And then we can have just a whole bunch of loyal servants!

Tiger: …sounds reasonable…

Jade’s Luck: I mean, Gareth doesn’t like pirates, but if they promise not ever to be pirates again, then they aren’t pirates anymore. And we don’t have to kill them. So, we’re offering them new lives as productive members of the new Solar Empire.

Tiger didn’t have a problem with her making a pact, so Jade’s Luck had to decide which group they were going to talk to first. There was the crew, who were locked in a room. There were the pirates, who were locked in the brig. And there were Jahar’s two loyal acolytes, who were locked in Jahar’s room learning to read.

Gabe: See Spot Run. Spot Run Spot. That’s not right.

Ryan: Spot is a Solar.

Liz: Run Spot Run. Spot is a Spot.

Alex: Spot Summons Demons. Demons are okay if they are controlled.

Liz: Demons are bad. Bad Demons Bad!

Gabe then decided Jahar had to write the first reading book of the new age. Liz decided Jade’s Luck would have to write the annotated edition.

Ceri found out that a fisherman from another village by the name of Hunar arrived about a week ago. He had been blown off course and wasn’t feeling too well. Then he became very ill and someone was sent off to find her. Yesterday he died, but more people were now getting sick. The symptoms were flu-like as wasn’t always fatal, so Ceri set about dividing people up between the sick, the healthy and the recently exposed and made sure everyone was well hydrated.

The dinghy hit shore, skidded along the sand, and A-dom continued rowing for a bit up the beach. As the trio got out of the boat, Jahar found some tracks and started following them into the forest. A-dom was a little worried with the stability of Creation with city-boy #1 finding tracks.

A-dom: You don’t like pirates, right?

Gareth: No.

A-dom: Good. All is right with the world.

Gareth and A-dom told Jahar that Ceri went to the village, not into the forest, and headed off towards the village. They found Ceri in the middle of village ordering people around. Talking with Ceri and a few of the sick, Gareth determined that it was West Nifle flu; a very contagious flu, but not too lethal. She had a good handle on what she was doing, but he gave her some suggestions for making the people feel better quicker and feel more comfortable.

Not long after they arrived, A-dom started to not feel so good.

A-dom: Uh, I don’t like this island. (pause) I don’t think I can raise myself.

Jade’s Luck decided that, since the pirates already knew they were anathema, that was the place to start. She headed down to the brig with Tiger and found a crate she could stand on the talk to the pirates.

Jade’s Luck: I suppose you were wondering what was going to become of you.

Pirates: We don’t want to die!

She proposed a deal to them which hinged on them not being pirates again and working for her. Since they couldn’t rule out the possibility of her wanting them to do piracy, they agreed to just be her loyal servants.

Jade’s Luck: You have to be nice. No making undead, no killing people. Well, unless those people need to be killed.

Jade’s Luck referred to A-dom and Jahar, whom the pirates only knew as ‘The Murderer’ and ‘The One Who Makes Heads Explode.’ She worked out with them the terms of the pact. There was lots of group huddling between the pirates. They decided they would risk it.

Jade’s Luck: Okay, I think we all need to be holding hands?

*Pirates look at her like she is crazy*

Jade’s Luck: We all have to be touching.

Pirates: (sounding hopeful) We all have to touch you?

She worked out that they needed to form a circle with their hand in. Jade’s Luck and Tiger went into the brig and Jade’s Luck touched one of the pirates on a non stinky looking part.

Jade’s Luck: I promise to treat you all with justice and mercy for the duration of your lives. You all promise to be my loyal servants for the rest of your lives, never betraying myself or my circle, Tiger, A-dom, Jahar, Gareth in any way. Or betraying any of our companions that I will name later. Also, never give any indication that I or my companions are anything other than mortal.

Pirates: (unsure voice) We’ll try?

Jade’s Luck: Okay, if we screw up and do it ourselves, not your fault.

Pirates: Oh good. Yes, sure, we’re all for it.

Jade’s Luck then let them out and set them up working on the ship. Fatty asked where the galley was. Fatty was thrilled, since this was the best stocked galley he had ever been in. She found out who the best sailor was, Bob, and put him in charge of making sure all was well. Bob checked to make sure they were anchored then sat behind the wheel. She told the others to do their usual chores, but they didn’t have a demon for them to feed. She told them to make rope knots or whatnot.

Jade’s Luck and Tiger then went to the crew’s locked cabin. Luck went inside while the still glowing Tiger stayed outside the room.

Jade’s Luck: Hi guys.

Crew: Hello.

Jade’s Luck: The problem is all gone.

Crew Member #1: What was her name again?

Crew Member #2: Luck, I think.

Crew: Hello Luck. Can we come out now? Are the anathema gone?

Jade’s Luck: Uh, the demon is gone.

The crew became awful nervous at that answer.

Jade’s Luck: Okay, sorry, what I meant, I keep forgetting that regular people aren’t scholars and don’t need extra explanations. Yes the anathema are gone.

Crew: Oh good. Are you sure?

Jade’s Luck: Yes, well, cause, well, wait explanations bad. One of them ran away and we killed two.

Crew: Anathemas… What about demons?

Jade’s Luck: Well, the one that ran away was the demon pulling the boat, and it big scary, and it went that way. We stayed here.

Crew: Okay.

Jade’s Luck: Were there other anathema?

Crew: We heard a lot. And there was some glowing. No glowing out there now, just the sun. There was one glowing all gold.

Jade’s Luck: Well, anyway, it was kind of a good thing cause the pirates got all scared and surrendered. The ones that didn’t die when the demons sunk their boat.

Crew: Okay.

Jade’s Luck: So we have some new crew.

Crew: Why did the demon summoning crew surrender to you guys?

Jade’s Luck: Well, they got scared with all the glowing guys.

Crew: Okay. Who’s side were they on?

Jade’s Luck: I don’t know, but they didn’t seem to like the demons.

Crew: Can we talk to the captain?

Jade’s Luck told them he was off ship at the moment, but she’d go get him. She locked the door when she left and sent Tiger off to the island to find Gareth. She also asked Tiger to tell Gareth about their new crew before he got back to the ship.

Back on the island, Jahar decided to amuse himself by looking for a demesne. For this he’d need a new crystal and virgin’s hair. Being Jahar, he figured he could find some perfect crystals lying around in the forest, so started off on his own.

A-dom: Jahar! Sit!

Jahar: Come with me!

A-dom: Where are you going?

Jahar: Looking for crystals.

A-dom: Oh, cool.

The two wandered off into the forest. They thought that perfect crystals came from old shaman’s huts and shops in the market, so they just wandered around looking for rocks.

As they wandered, A-dom was starting to feel worse.

A-dom: A-dom feeling minus twoey.

Back in the village, things were going well. Gareth and Ceri were caring for the sick in different huts. After a while, Gareth noticed a little old lady standing behind him

Old Lady: You should have children by now!

Gareth: Grandma?

Grandma: You should have children by now! Your brother and sister both have children.

Grandma pulled out a stick and poked Gareth.

Gareth: I’ve been kind of busy! Ow!

Grandma: You should be married!

Gareth: I’ve got time! I’ve got plenty of time.

Grandma: Well, get married. Find a nice woman.

Gareth: I don’t know any. I know some insane ones.

Grandma: I’ll find a you nice woman.

She started wandering around poking women with her stick and muttering No, not you. Gareth tried to get her to stop, saying they were sick and he was tending to them.

Grandma: Why don’t I hear any prayers? Huh? Huh? Not nice enough to thank your old grandma, huh?

Gareth: Uh, I forgot.

Grandma: Oh, sure.

She opened the door and faded away as she walked outside.

Back in the forest, Jahar decided that they weren’t finding any crystals and wanted to find out what the woods were about, so activated Spirit Detecting Glance. About five feet away from them, Jahar could see all of the demons from the top of the Manse, Hooknar and a number of odd looking undead ghost type things all in a huddle. As Jahar stared at their group in shock, Hooknar noticed.

Hooknar: I think he can see us!

Jahar: A-dom. Walk normally.

A-dom swaggered as he walked.

Jahar: A-dom. All the demons you ever let loose about five feet from us watching us.

A-dom: I didn’t let any demons loose!

Jahar: And they now know we can see them. And by we I mean I.

A-dom: (confused) K? What do we do?

Jahar: Let’s go back towards town nonchalantly.

A-dom: that!

A-dom started running his fastest back towards town. Being left alone, Jahar started casting Flight of Separation. This just made A-dom run faster. Jahar turned into a flock of birds and realized he had to travel an extra hundred miles. The thousands of birds flew very fast around the island about a hundred times very fast before rocketing back in towards the island and crashing near the village.

The pirate crew started yelling Sorcerer!

Jade’s Luck told them that it was Jahar, one of her group. They asked her why no one was watching him, since it was Calibration.

Tiger, having walked to shore, walked up to Jahar as A-dom ran up behind Jahar. Jahar felt a poke in the stomach.

Grandma: (poking people) Not a girl, not a girl, not a girl.

*Woman yeeks at being poked*

Grandma: Nah, not good enough.

They noticed the little old lady, but ignored her. Jahar filled Tiger in on the demons in the woods. Since Jahar didn’t see any demons following them, Tiger went off and found Gareth.

Tiger: Yeah, Jade’s Luck had a talk with the crew and they decided they needed to talk to you.

Gareth tried to get out of it by stating he might transfer the disease to the ship. Jahar walked into the hut with a hankerchief over his mouth and told him that the demons were following the Circle around. Gareth asked them if they had seen a little old lady walking around.

A-dom: Your grandmother’s invisible?

Gareth: No, she’s dead.

All of the mortal occupants of the hut shifted away from the Circle members. Jahar then began talking about pickling heads. Figuring it was safer for his sanity to go back to the ship, he went and told Ceri he had going back to the ship for a bit. One of the helpers had relayed Jahar’s topics to her, so she asked Gareth to get ‘his friend’ to not talk about pickling heads.

Villager: No, now its sorcery during Calibration. Should we get the fire and pitchforks ready?

Ceri assured the villager that it wasn’t necessary and Jahar didn’t mean any harm, he was just stupid. Gareth washed all of his clothes and body thoroughly to prevent spreading the disease.

As Jahar and Tiger wandered out of their hut to talk, Jahar started feeling sick, but tried to hide it.

Back at the boat, Gareth found the pirate crew walking around. Some of them were fishing, some had their weapons back, one was sitting up by the wheel.

Bob: Everything is still okay, sir!

Jade’s Luck: Uh, hey guys. This is Gareth. He built this ship.

Bob: Ah, nice ship!

Jade’s Luck: He’s part of the Circle.

Gareth: (confused and slightly annoyed) I’m the Captain on this boat…

Jade’s Luck’s Loyal Servants: Excellent. We answer to her!

Gareth: (glaring at Jade’s Luck) Right…

Bob: We made a deal. There was glowing and everything.

Jade’s Luck: (nervous chuckle) They’re not pirates anymore?

Gareth definitely looked like he needed a drink at this point.

Gareth: (could this day get any worse voice) What’s the problem?

Jade’s Luck: (nervous chuckle) You might want to go see the crew. They asked to see you.

Gareth: (this day just got worse voice) Oh great. OOOkay.

Jade’s Luck: Oh, and one of the pirates made a good point about sorcerers needing babysitters at Calibration. (pause) Does Jahar have a babysitter?

Gareth: He’s got two.

Jade’s Luck: Does A-dom have a babysitter?

Gareth: Last I saw they were going around together.

Jade’s Luck: Nooooo! Noooooo. Umm… you want me to, um, to um, um go to the village to, umm, babysit them?

Gareth told her the village was very contagious and that she should stay on the boat. He told her that A-dom looked like he had gotten sick.

Jade’s Luck: So maybe they don’t need babysitters?

Gareth: All I know is that my grandmother is wandering around the village poking people.

Jade’s Luck: But, well, you said I was in charge…

Gareth: Clearly a mistake.

Jade’s Luck: But, umm, I didn’t want you to kill them all, so now you don’t have to kill them all because they’re loyal and they’re loyal.

Bob: And you’re all perfectly normal.

Jade’s Luck: Cause, they didn’t want to die and I didn’t want to kill them…

She did eventually fill him in that the crew had seen glowing the other night and weren’t happy about it. She didn’t really tell him why the crew wanted to talk to him.

Back in the village, Jahar wandered around looking for Gareth’s grandmother.

Jahar: What’s your name?

Grandma: Grandma!

Jahar: Do you bleed?

(long pause)

Grandma: (threatening tone) Don’t make me go get my grandson!

Jahar: He’s a friend of mine.

Grandma: No wonder he doesn’t have a wife yet!

Jahar settled down with a pile of rocks examining them. Some of the rocks exploded.

Down below on the ship, the crew quickly ushered Gareth into their room.

Crew member #1: (whisper) We think some of your crew are anathema.

They said that, besides the glowing the night before, when Jade’s Luck left, she locked the door and had a conversation with someone who said he was glowing. They weren’t sure, but they thought it was either Tiger or Jahar. Also, when they asked her if the anathema was gone, she got all dodgy.

While Gareth was talking to the crew, there was a knock on the door. Grandma said she needed to talk to him.

After watching a flow of essence make a wave in the sand, Jahar wandered over to the healthy villager that was keeping an eye on him and asked him if he knew where he could find some gemstones. When the villager said he didn’t know what a gemstone was, Jahar said they were crystals; shiny stones.

Jahar: Do you have any pretties?

The healthy villager immediately went to Ceri.

Healthy Villager #1: The sorcerer is asking about the women folk now.

When asked what else he had done, the villager responded that Jahar had made five rocks explode, then made squiglies in the sand.

Healthy Villager #1: Then he asked about the women-folk. He wanted the pretty ones. I think he wants them for a sacrifice.

Ceri told him to stay away from the sick people and walked over to Jahar.

Jahar: You know where I might find any gemstones?

She said no and asked why the villagers thought he was looking for women. He replied that he had said pretties and was trying to use a word that would make them think of gemstones. She told him gemstones had no worth here. He asked her if she knew how he could find one, because he wanted to find a demesne.

Ceri: You know what? I’m not helping you find anything until Calibration is over. You’re exploding rocks.

Jahar: I had no idea essence was so troublesome during Calibration.

Lori: How come I have control of myself and Jahar doesn’t?

Gabe: Because you have sense and Jahar doesn’t.

Ceri looked at Jahar’s bloodshot eyes.

Ceri: I have a special hut for you.

Jahar: I can drink water out here.

Ceri: You can drink water in the hut! There are healthy villagers wandering around out here. They don’t need to pick it up from you.

A-dom: Yeah, sicko! *Cough, cough, gag, wheeze*

A-dom and Jahar put up some resistance, but Ceri wouldn’t take no for an answer.

The crew asked Gareth if they could get out, since a lot of them needed to urinate and they were hungry. When Gareth told them there was a plague on the island, they didn’t want to get out anymore. He took their full bucket, said he’d get them a few more buckets and some food.

Once out, he locked the door and ushered his grandmother away before talking to her. She told him she had found a wife for him.

Grandma: Really pretty one. Good hips. Running around giving orders to everyone.

When he said he had a few thousand years, she said that meant he could be married twice! That’s a lot of kids he could have.

Jade’s Luck walked up and asked Gareth who he was talking to. He dismissively responded his grandmother. Grandma poked Jade’s Luck and said she might be good too.

Gareth: No, no, no she’s not.

Back in the village, Jahar was being a bad sick person. He was wandering around looking for dying people to write down a prayer. Ceri saw this and ushered him back to his hut. He wanted the prayer for the artifact he was trying to build and tried to explain it, but Jahar isn’t good at explaining when he is well.

Gareth told Jade’s Luck that the crew was okay for now. He dumped the bucket, found a few more, and wandered into the galley.

Fatty: Would you like something to eat, sir?

There was a very long silence as Gareth took in the scene. Fatty had clearly made himself at home and had reorganized the shelves.

Gareth: I had that all organized.

Fatty: It is organized better now. I’m the cook!

Gareth: I’m the Captain!

Fatty: Hello Captain. I’m loyal to this nice little girl. She’s perfectly normal.

Gareth: (muttering) No, no she’s not.

Jade’s Luck: He’s perfectly normal.

Fatty: Yes, you’re perfectly normal too.

Gareth just gave up at this point and told Fatty he needed some food for the crew locked in their room. Fatty was really fast. It is amazing what demon-summoning masters will do for your speed. Gareth brought the food back and told them he’d be back in a while.

Gareth told Jade’s Luck that the crew would need to be fed and their pee buckets dumped every so often. Fatty took up the task of the of feeding them.

When Gareth went back on deck, he zoned out into a vision.

He remembered sailing up to this little podnock piece of land. He remembered getting off and meeting Calibration’s Diplomacy (Tiger) here.

Evening Tide of Autumn: The island is a success. The door works. It looks like a perfectly normal hut. And I didn’t want just anyone to use it, so you have to get permission from the current ruler of the land. And if you don’t, you’ll just end up in a closet.

Calibration’s Diplomacy: What if there is no leader?

Evening Tide of Autumn: Well, then the door stops working. We don’t want just anyone to walk into heaven. I mean that would be bad!

Gareth knew he had been talking about an island to the south.

Shaking himself back to the present, Gareth smiled and headed off for land. He found out that Tiger was off wandering around looking for coral and would be back in a couple hours, so he went to check with Ceri on how the villagers were doing. She said they were getting better fairly rapidly.

Gareth: And how are the wonder twins doing?

Ceri: You know them better than I do. Do they always talk insane or is it the illness?

Gareth: There is no good answer to that question.

Ceri: I heard they were looking for gemstones, which I can understand, being from civilized lands, but the villagers thought they were looking for pretty girls…

Gareth: Ah. You were talking to Jahar!

She told him about the exploding rocks and the sand and that she had banished them to a hut and had someone keeping an eye on them.

Ceri went and relieved the poor old lady watching the duo. She said they had been talking about making a ghost ship.

Jahar slept and dreamt of zombie sheep.

When Tiger came back, Gareth filled him in on the crew’s situation. He also filled Tiger in on his vision. When Tiger heard you needed permission of the ruler of the land, his first thought was that they needed to take over the land.

As the sun set, Grandma faded in.

Grandma: She’s in the hut. With your two crazy friends. You should go talk to her.

Gareth put her off by telling her he would in a little bit. The two went back to the boat to deal with the crew. Gareth really wasn’t sure what he was going to do when he got there, but felt it needed to be dealt with.

Crewman #6: Sir. What’s with the pirates on the ship?

Gareth told them that the pirates had sold themselves into the ship’s service to pay off their bad deeds. They still didn’t understand why the pirates could walk around and they couldn’t. Gareth explained that it had to deal with the Anathema thing.

Crewman #6: So who is it and when are we going to jump him?

Gareth sent Tiger out of the room and whispered.

Gareth: Okay, listen. I need you guys to make a deal to be loyal to me. Otherwise, well, you know how I said we had an anathema problem? I can assure you everybody here lives. But, if you don’t swear, the one out there is going to start killing people. And I’m pretty damn sure he can take on everyone in this room. He seems to be cool with it if you guys are loyal to me. I seem to be able to reason with him and he listens to me.

Four of them said they’d swear. Three of them said, We’ll save you sir!, pushed Gareth out of the way, then opened the door.

Gareth: I’m fine, its you I’m worried about.

The battle was short and not as brutal as it could have been. Apparently Tiger didn’t see the need to kill three unarmed men attacking him. Three people trying to force their way out of one door slowed them down, not that they had a chance of acting before Tiger. Tiger took a step forward, kneed the one in the middle in the groin, grabbed the other twos’ heads and smashed them against the wall.

Paul: Plus two stunt. You actually used the damn environment!

Gabe: I’ve been looking for the environment…

With three wounded and unconscious men on the ground, Gareth leaned over to tend to them. Tiger stepped into the room and closed the door.

Tiger: Now we have a deal to make with you.

Remaining Crew: We’re all for it sir. It was just those three -ups.

Tiger: That’s good to hear.

The crew offered to throw the men overboard or give them to the plague-ridden people.

Tiger got the conscious crewmembers to gather for the oath binding. Gareth recited a slightly altered oath from Jade’s Luck’s.

Gareth: I promise to treat you with justice and mercy for the duration of your lives. You all promise to be my loyal servants for the rest of your lives and never betraying myself or those I travel with. You also can never give any indication any of us are anything less, umm I mean anything more than mortal.

Crewman #7: Can we get paid a fair wage?

Gareth: Yes, you’ll be paid a fair wage. You’ll be paid and treated fairly.

They agreed and Tiger flared. Gareth told the crew they could go mingle. Tiger and Gareth took the unconscious trio and locked them in the brig. The crew was instructed not to let them out till he said.

A-dom got better the next day, but Jahar puked essense. The sorcery use may have made his sickness worse. Ceri gave A-dom a clean bill of health, but told him he needed to stick with one of his friends because he was still a sorcerer during calibration.

Gareth returned to the village and his grandma kept motioning for him to go into the hut.

Jahar: Grandma, is that you?

Ceri:: That’s not your grandma.

Gareth: (to Grandma) Yes, she is very lovely.

Grandma: Good childbearing hips.

Gareth: My grandma says you have good childbearing hips.

Ceri:: Uhhhh. Thank you? It’s going to bee a while before they’re put to use.

In another hut, a voice could be heard.

Squeaky Voice: Grandpa? Aren’t you dead?

They saw a little boy run out of a hut and through the village.

Jahar: A-dom, what’d you do?

In the other hut, A-dom and Gareth found a fairly solid old man. The old man gave Gareth flack, so A-dom said he wasn’t a zombie. They went to find the kid and calm him down. A-dom picked the kid up. He explained that it was okay because it was calibration and his grandpa wasn’t going to hurt him. Once A-dom put the kid down again, the kid hid behind Gareth. A-dom amused himself by going ‘Boo!’ at the kid.

During that day, Gareth filled A-dom in on his vision and how the portal worked. A-dom got worried about the whole permission part. He wanted to know if everyone needed permission.

A-dom: Umm.. You know about volcanoes? You know about getting thrown in volcanoes? I kinda avoided that. Not in the good way. The leader, umm… he doesn’t like me so much.

Gareth asked him why he couldn’t just look like someone else. A-dom didn’t explain why not.

A-dom: Especially the leader. Um, well, the leader. You see… I kinda stole his hat. He was called ‘Feathered One’ and had a big feathered hat. Yeah, well, he kinda doesn’t have one. And you know about the horses and the bad stealing? I kinda got caught.

Jahar gave him the idea that he could just give the hat back, if he still had it. A-dom said he still had it. Well, it was hidden near the volcano. After all, it was in a thing so it might still be there.

Jahar then told A-dom he shouldn’t be afraid. After all, he had seem A-dom jump a hundred feet in the air and come crashing down on the pirate ship to destroy it. He could do that to Abalone.

Gareth explained that that was a monumentally bad idea. Since the island was constructed to be a doorway to heaven, it was, in essence, one big manse.

Gareth: Don’t break the island. You might open up a portal to Malfese or something.

Jahar: Well, we need to go there too anyway.

Everyone else: NO WE DON’T!

The next day, Gareth sought out Ceri.

Gareth: We’re going to go to heaven. Wanna come along?

Ceri: Umm. You all seem to have a problem with not explaining what you’re saying. So, huh?

Gareth: Oh. Sorry. The Unconquered Sun is not really good with the giving of instructions and how he wants his religion run and all that fun stuff. So, we’re going to take a trip to heaven to have a chat with him. Find out a couple things.

Ceri: Just… going to heaven?

Gareth: Yeah.

Ceri: Walking in?

Gareth: Well, through a portal, but yeah.

Jahar: They probably sell some decent crystals there…

Gareth smacked Jahar for that response.

Ceri: I need a little time before I can give you a response. I need to pray.

Gareth: I don’t know if your god gives you more instructions or whatever or if you want to go talk to her or something. We’re going to talk to ours. All we’ve seem of him is ‘You want to live? You want to work for me? Ah good!’ Zap!

Ceri: He asked you if you want to live? My god won’t grant you anything until you have decided to live.

Gareth: Yeah. Our god is kind of an opportunist.

Ceri: Let me get back to you on this.

While praying, she recalled that the point of meeting during Calibration was so that you could take care of people who weren’t currently up to speed on things. It strongly appeared to her that she was the only one anywhere near to being up to speed, so the other clearly needed her help.

Ceri: I have a slight counter offer.

A-dom: We’ll take it!

Gareth: A-dom!

She offered to take the group to see her mentor. She said he might be willing to clue the Circle in a bit more. They’d have to behave or he might eat them, but they might learn a thing or two before they went into heaven blind. She said if they were willing to do that she’d feel much better about going into heaven.

Gareth: I think we’d like to meet other anathema that didn’t want to kill us.

Jahar: To be fair, we have met other anathema that didn’t want to kill us. What about A-dom’s buddy?

A-dom: Skelly?

Jahar: No, the Death lord.

They decided to take her up on her offer.

Ceri: You definitely need to go somewhere else before going into heaven.

A-dom: The Underworld and Unconquered Sun have certain relationships and I’m just a liason…ish.

Jahar let everyone know about the demons following them around and to be careful about going off alone. The group decided to while away the remaining days of Calibration before setting sail.