Forcing Someone to DM?

[BlackMoria]

The best way to deal with this is to talk with the players. Address the problem player and ask what he trying to accomplish with his grandstanding and lack of cooperation. The answers he/she gives should give some insight as to the root issue. Maybe it is a character concept that is too 'dialed up'? Maybe the player feels unappreciated or marginalized by the others and the acting out is a result?

Once you have an idea of what is going on, try addressing the underlying causes and mutually come up with the solution.

The possibility exists that the player is just being a total dick. Take him aside and tell him in no uncertain terms that the behavior will not tolerated further and if he continues, you will stop the game and he will be shown the door. Tell him he can come to the next session but if he continues his disruptive behavior, he will be shown the door again. Let him know he is welcome back but on the third disruption, he is out - permanently.

He will either wise up and conform or get his knickers in a knot and quit.

Too many DM seem afraid to talk with or confront their characters and allow disruptive behavior. These DMs need to cowboy up and take ownership to the fact that it is their game and they have the lion's share of the responsibility to ensure it is fun and entertaining for everyone, including the DM.

Don't tolerate jerks at your table.

 

[Retreater]

Retreater - Where do you play?

At a friend's house - not the gamer who's causing the problems, BTW. In about a month I plan on moving the game to my new house. YIPPEE!

To me this sounds like you don't speak with your players outside of your games. Bad mistake! Do your players know, how you feel about this? Tell them! Communication is key.

Actually, I have spoken to the players about this. Most of the players and I spoke briefly about it after the session (the offending member left a little early that night). Others I've had dialog with through email ... probably the best way to have a group discussion when we can't all meet up at a physical location. The "problem gamer" I met with for lunch earlier this week. He says that he knows there's a problem in the group, but it's not *his* problem ... it's with everyone else.

The reason why I know this behavior is spoiling the fun for the rest of the players is because they've told me.

If no one is willing to DM, try switching games for a bit just to re-energize yourself.

That's why we've switched from D&D 3.5 to GURPS Modern, also because the "problem" player really wanted to play a modern game.



My wife is a teacher and quite a strict disciplinarian (albeit for elementary school students). Her advice is to deal with the situation ASAP, so that should be at this weekend's game.

I really don't have a problem running the game. I just hate running it for completely loose cannon players (not that I want to railroad the adventure ... there's just certain things that are so random of actions that become disruptive.)

Retreater

 

[Treebore]

I've done something like that before. Because of the grief that was constantly heaped on me, I told my group I was not DMing for them anymore so if they wanted to play, one of them would have to pick up the mantle. Some of them did . . . and got a taste of their own medicine. They learned their lesson and I later resumed DM duties.

Any time someone who has never DMed makes it known they think they can do a better job I tell them to go ahead. They are the DM as of next session. They either shut up, or they step up and give it a go. Either way I am the winner because they are afraid to DM, or they DM and find out it isn't nearly as easy as it can look to be. So they "respect the position" one way or another. I prefer it when they try to DM. Its even better when they take a liking to DMing and are good at it. I get to play.

Typically those who know how to DM know to give positive feedback and when its best to give that feedback. The few who are lousy/horrible DM's irregardless never learn. At least not before they are kicked out of the game. Afterwards I don't care anymore.

 

[Mark]

Retreater - Where do you play?

At a friend's house - not the gamer who's causing the problems, BTW. In about a month I plan on moving the game to my new house. YIPPEE!

Congrats.

Actually, I have spoken to the players about this. Most of the players and I spoke briefly about it after the session (the offending member left a little early that night). Others I've had dialog with through email ... probably the best way to have a group discussion when we can't all meet up at a physical location. The "problem gamer" I met with for lunch earlier this week. He says that he knows there's a problem in the group, but it's not *his* problem ... it's with everyone else.

The reason why I know this behavior is spoiling the fun for the rest of the players is because they've told me.

Well, you have to do something if everyone else is having a problem. If I were in your situation I might be prone to ask the offending player to reconsider his playing style and explain why it is problematic. Let him know you are thinking it is not a good fit with the group. Tell him you've had time to consider his position and the position of the rest of the group and if things do not work themself out soon you will have to take action beyond just having a talk. Ask the rest of the players to give you a month to get things straightened out.

That's why we've switched from D&D 3.5 to GURPS Modern, also because the "problem" player really wanted to play a modern game.

When switching to your house, you might want to switch to your favorite system. If the player is still a problem, that is the time to make that change, too. You might want to take the intervening weeks to try out a new player or two while you are at it.

 

[Glyfair]

I think that most of the time the work I do goes unappreciated.

Interesting that WotC just put up an article with a similar comment ("my player's don't appreciate me").

http://www.wizards.com/default.asp?x=dnd/sg/20070720

 

[Doug McCrae]

I love how the Save My Game author always kicks the cr@p out of everyone who writes in. It's pretty funny. Wonder why people keep doing it.

 

[Treebore]

I love how the Save My Game author always kicks the cr@p out of everyone who writes in. It's pretty funny. Wonder why people keep doing it.

I don't know about the rest of the articles, but that particular one may have treated him a little "rough", but what the author says is true.

 

[EyeontheMountain]

I love how the Save My Game author always kicks the cr@p out of everyone who writes in. It's pretty funny. Wonder why people keep doing it.

Ever seen Oprah? Or other talk shows. How, and more importantly, where do they get those..... people ( I think)

 

[fusangite]

EDIT: Now that I've read the whole thread, I'll just recommend that it's time to change personnel. There's no way around it. You have a social problem here not a gaming problem. And it requires a social solution, in the form of changing the composition of your gaming group.

 

[Deset Gled]

I got burned out, quit DMing, and forced another player to take over the role once; but I did warn him ahead of time. He was a good friend, and took it in stride. Eventually though, he decided the group was just too much of a pain in the ass to hold together (ex: as the DM, both of us had occasion to tell a player to put away a magazine or laptop), and things broke up.

In the end, forcing someone else to DM caused the demise of the group. But in retrospect, that's not necessarily a bad thing.