D&D General Friday Fun: Explain A D&D Thing Badly

[Shiroiken]

Standard D&D adventure... home invasion for fun and profit.

 

[Benjamin Olson]

I swore a pact to serve a magic sword. No, not this magic sword I'm holding, a better, cooler magic sword that teaches me magic spells it can't cast itself. It picked me because I'm so charismatic, while also being a misunderstood loner. Or at least it will when I reach 3rd level.

 

[TaranTheWanderer]

Sorry, are you asking us to quote World Without Numbers spell titles?

 

[overgeeked]

My bad description of D&D combat:

"Twenty minutes of fun, packed into four hours."

It's a perfect description of bad D&D combat.

 

[overgeeked]

So I made a deal with the devil. No, not that devil. No, wait. Stop trying to guess. You've never heard of them. They live in the bottom of the well in the next town. Anyway, so I made this deal for all this power and the more things I murder the more power I get. And get this...no matter how I mess with, betray, or even kill the devil I made the deal with...I have this power forever. It's mine, they can't take it away. I just have to keep murdering all these innocent and semi-innocent creatures of varying levels of sentience. Nods. And yes, I am the good guy hero.

 

[Deset Gled]

Straight from 3. 5e:

"This spell causes an object to radiate shadowy illumination out to a 20-foot radius."

Hmm. What's a good name for a spell that creates illumination? I know! I shall call this "Darkness".

 

[CleverNickName]

It's a perfect description of bad D&D combat.

I said what I said.

 

[AlViking]

I carefully grasp my spring loaded device in my left hand and grab a stick with a small bit of sharp metal attached to one end. Keeping the metal bit as far from me as possible and carefully rest the stick end (the one with bird plumage attached) on the string that is keeping the stringy piece of wood from snapping back.

Finally I pull the string back on my device to increase the tension, look down the stick to the piece of metal and center it on a small point a few feet above the angry reptile that is approaching me swiftly. I let go of the string, turning the potential energy of the spring into kinetic energy that hurtles the stick and it's blasted pointy piece of metal far away. I reach for another stick to get rid of the next piece of pointy metal.

 

[DEFCON 1]

Well, it's called 'Constitution' because it's the foundation of who we are as a people and we're glad it's good, but it's annoying that you can never really change it.

 

[Reynard]

It's simple. First you decide how you feel about stabbing people. Then you decide how you feel about stealing from their corpses. And where those overlap, that's your personality!